livius drusus:

In case of terrorist attack, use the sperm faucet to neutralize chemical agents.

Mageth:

Never, and we mean never, rescue Pigpen.

Linda:

In case of national emergency, don't even think about stealing your personnel file!

Mageth:

And that's not all you get with this amazing TV Home Terrorist offer. In addition to the jumbo size bucket of plutonium, the regular size canister of plutonium, and the handy purse-size plutonium dispenser, for a limited time we'll also include this versatile bomb ABSOLUTELY FREE! Strap it on or stuff it in a briefcase! All for only three easy payments of $19.95! Plus applicable shipping and handling fees. Not sold in stores. Nondescript delivery vans and briefcases sold separately.

Evilweevil:

If you see a nearby explosion, pull over and watch the fireworks


It's probably just a Toys 'R' Us

cartographer:

By the way, the hottest toy for this coming Christmas is going to be
Dr. Frankenstein's Monster!

Some assembly required.

PS. It's pronounced Franken-steen

DarkBronzePlant:

I want my two dollars!

Nazon:

"Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow"

Mecha_Dude:

In the event of a terrorist attack the LIBERAL MEDIA will begin spewing their EVIL anti-american LIES!!!! Protect yourselves by watching ONLY the FOX NEWS!

Nazon:

WARNING:We are the thought police. Even thinking of terrorism will result in your arrest. Big Brother is always watching.

JustVisiting:

If your ever caught checking out your buddies ass, drop, cover your face and roll around until your sexual preference has been re-established.

JawiKunn:

In the event where a terrorist may steal your vital organs, suitable replacements for lungs are jellybeans and honeycomb for a stomach.

philechat:

I thought God does not smite IIDB users...

Corona688:

This is the song that doesn't end...


Yes it goes on and on my friend...


Some people... staarted singing it not knowing what it was...


And they'll continue singing it forever just because -

Linda:

That damn Chicken Little - - I thought he was just lying again!

JawiKunn:

While being attacked by terrorists, blowing a whistle may cause excessive amounts of hairloss. Shouting is a good alternative, but by that time you may have probably already lost all your hair from blowing that damn whistle!