comedy

Comedy

Disclaimer Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

Best Intentions : March 2001

Category- Challenge response #1004, humor, smarm
Season- 4 somewhere between The Light and Exodus
Spoilers - none really so even though it takes place season 4 it doesn't spoil anything
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- nothing really…just some innuendo, and an ornery Jack
Summary- If my math is right Teal'c's birthday is March 15 (47 days from the airing of The Light…wonder how SG-1 celebrates it????)

Bits and Pieces : July 2000

season- 4 between Small Victories and The Other Side
Content level - Older kids/Teens
content warning- cruelty to...bugs, a little language
summary- stress relief
spoilers- Nemesis, Small Victories, Urgo

Blame it on the Primta July 2003

Denise & Adi
sky_diver119@yahoo.com , dr_bev_crasher@yahoo.com
Season- 6
Spoilers - Nothing really
Content level - Older kids/Teens -
Content Warning- Silliness, what happens when you're playing around on MSN messenger and decide to write a two person round robin
Summary- Jack discovers something about two members of his team

This all started out as a nice serious discussion about just how many sentient beings are involved if a Jaffa or host get into a relationship…and careened nicely downhill from there. You have no idea how much fun we had just coming up with the title. ;)

Bowl Blues March 2003

Season - 4ish
Spoilers - None
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning - silliness
Jack and bowl...an unstoppable duo, but will they come between him and Sam?

If you've never heard about it, check out Jack and Bowl

Reconciliation April 2003

Season - 4ish
Spoilers - None
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning - silliness
Jack and bowl...will he see the errors of his ways? Sequel to Bowl Blues

If you've never heard about it, check out Jack and Bowl

Chitchat

Season- 7
Spoilers - Divide and Conquer, Desperate Measures, Chimera
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Nothing really, one swear word
Summary-Teal'c has a little talk with you know who. <BEG>

For Hoodat and anyone else who just -adores- Pete ;)

Convening Authority :August 2002

season- 6
Content level - Older kids/Teens
content warning- my bad sense of humorcruelty to...bugs, a little language
summary- The challenge was to use Jonas, a klingon costume, a fly swatter, a public restroom and 'Geronimo' in a fic
spoilers- Small one for 'The Other Guys

Dressing the Part May 2003

Season - any
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning - slight hint o ship/slash
Summary - It's short, why summarize

Eavesdropping August 2002

Season- 6
Spoilers - Descent
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- mmmhm….some suggestiveness, little silliness
Summary- What's that saying abouteavesdroppers?
Thanks to Sel and Adi for their advice.

Glow Me February 2002

Season- 5
Spoilers - Meridian big time…Urgo, 100 Days, Broca Divide, First Commandment, Absolute Power, Maternal Instinct
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little Language, some suggestive language
Summary- An episode parody of Meridian
Mmmhm….there are so many rules now…. Yes it has Daniel in it…But yes it has Jonas in it…(that simple fact is enough to get me flamed)…yes it is a little risque and there is a vague mention of slash…but the only real contact is het…but it's NOT NC-17 although it does have its poor taste moments…pairings…well does contact count or only thought? If thought then Jonas/Daniel, Jonas/Jack, Jonas/Teal'c, Sam/Teal'c, Sam/Bob, Janet/Daniel, Hammmond/Other…and I think that's it…but the only real contact is Janet and Jonas…aah to heck with it. <G> Read on, enjoy it or hate it, feed me back or flame me….I give up.

Good Morning September 2003

S&J, vignette, Chimera Challenge
Season- any really, although later is better
Spoilers - None….one oblique reference to an old tv show, bonus points if you get it <G>
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Nothing
Summary- aah, it's 2 pages long, what's there to summarize?

Totally innocently, this idea came from something Lisa said to me in an e-mail, so thanks Lisa. It's been a while since I had a fic go from idea to completion within 24 hours.

The Hazards of Too Much Cake June 2002

Season- 6
Spoilers - Redemption 1&2, 48 Hours and many others in passing
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little Language
Summary- What you can eat can effect you in odd ways

Ice Dreams December 2002

Season 6
Spoilers - Abyss, Meridian
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Summary - So...they serve Ben and Jerry's at the SGC???

It's Not My Fault December 2001

Season- 1
Spoilers - emancipation, the movie, Solitudes, Politics
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Never, never, never let men or aliens do the Christmas Shopping <G>
Summary- It's Teal'c's first Christmas <BEG>

Jaffa Faux Pas December 2002

Season- 5ish
Spoilers - Crossroads, but only vaguely
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- little language, threats of violence…someone's on a tear
Summary- Teal'c commits a very, very serious violation…<BEG>

This is an answer to the H/C challenge, sort of an ABC challenge but the letters were STARGATESG1JACKDANIELTEALCANDSAM. Enjoy!

Knit One, Purl Two October 2001

Season- 5
Spoilers - Ascension, a little bit, Solitudes and Red Sky very, very vaguely
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Umm…bad jokes????

Summary- Jack really should be careful about shooting his mouth off.

Life's Little Ups and Downs May 2004

Season- eh, somewhere between 3 and 7, nothing explicit
Spoilers - Nothing really
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Sexual content, nothing massively explicit, but not for the kiddies either
Summary- Jack…has one of those days, or should I say nights

Blame this on one too many commercials featuring men, pills, and a four hour time limit

Maktel Schree Lotak Meta Setak Oz : October 2000

Season- 4
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content warning- Just a couple of swear words, and some bad jokes
Summary- What, there's supposed to be a plot? Well...umm...ok word spreads among the Tok'ra of a new system lord. Yeah, that'll work.
Spoilers- Tangent, Upgrades, Divide and Conquer, Tok'ra, real little one for Deadman Switch and a very vague one for Serpents Venom.

Note- thanks to Lems and Sanna. Their suggestions made this a far better piece. (Of what I don't know.)

Man on a Mission

Season- 8
Spoilers - Vague one for New Order
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little language
Jack O'Neill is a man on a mission

Masquerade December 2002

Season- 6
Spoilers - Smoke and Mirrors, Foothold
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- slight sexual situations, but nothing explicit (sorry)
Summary- Everything is not as it appears

The Naked Colonel Was Bare :August 2000
season- 4 during Window of Opportunity
Content level - Older kids/Teens(somebody is running around in a state of undress, but no gory details <Sorry>)
content warning- Mention of nudity, mention of violence, bit of language
summary- Gee, wonder what else happened during one of those pesky time loops? <g>
spoilers- Big huge one for Window of Opportunity, littler ones for Touchstone, 100 Days

One Man's Dinner :December 2000
Season- 4, during The Curse
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Just pick on T-man a little
Summary- Word of the month for January which is…you'll figure it out.

Oh Yes it is!! December 2001

Season- 1
Spoilers - This is a sequel to 'It's not my Fault', COTG, Emancipation, Singularity
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little Language
Summary- Revenge is such a sweet, sweet thing <BEG>

One Majorally Bad Day January 2001

Season- 4-5 only because they're packing P-90's
Spoilers - Actually, none really. Wow I must be slipping <G>
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Just a couple of swear words, nothing too bad
Summary- Umm…It's just one of those days with SG-1 <BEG>

Notes- I know I go the punchline for this fic from either Jmas or Rowan in chat, I just can't recall who. So thanks to both of you.

One Toetally Embarrassing Day September 2001

Season- 4 (only cause it mentions that cabin in Minnesota, no real plot)
Spoilers - COTG, The Curse(very, very vaguely), Singularity also very vaguely…but no real plot spoilers
Content level - Older kids/Teens, depends on just how dirty your mind is <G>
Content Warning- Little language, someone's nekked (but I'll leave that part up to your imagination)
Summary- Did you know that most accidents happen in the home? <BEG>

Thanks to Lems for the beta. The poor girl actually had to do this one on paper in the hotel room in Vancouver. Betcha she regrets convincing me to come now. <G>

Note- this is written for the soon to be newlyweds who just happen to get to guest star in it too. Congratulations guys. Peace, love and many, many years.

Ricochet : April 2000

spoilers- none really
summary- Daniel + automatic weapons = no/no
Content level - Older kids/Teens for language, violence, character injury and decapitation
season- Takes place just prior to Broca Divide, contains Janet's 1st day
Note: Ever wonder why, no matter how big of a bad guy they go up against, all Daniel gets is that wimpy pistol? With his track record, he should run around in full body armor. So did I and hopefully this story offers one explanation.

Stargazing March 2002

Season- 3/4
Spoilers - Nemesis, little ones for FIAD and Crystal Skull
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little language
Summary- Just a plotless piece of three people talking under the stars. (Plot, what plot?)

Tea Time July 2002
Season- 6
Spoilers - Meridian
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- My warped sense of humor
Summary- Why does Jonas drink tea??

Third Time Lucky January 2004

Season- 7
Spoilers - None beyond Daniel being back
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- My evil mind.
Summary- It's the third annual Wormcon Convention. Third in a series, Wormies Watch Out and It's an Experience. This is based on the premise that some members of SG-1 are fans of Wormhole X-Treme and go to the convention in Vancouver BC

Thanks to Sel for the wonderful beta. And to all the girls in chat who helped me come up with fun things for them to do. And dedicated to all those wonderful and wacky folks that make the yearly trek to Vancouver every year. See you in July.

The Things People Do in Public November 2002
Season- 6
Spoilers - None
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- My warped sense of humor
Summary- The title pretty much says it all

Watch where you step :April 2000
season- 3 only cause Sam's a major
Content level - Older kids/Teens for language
spoilers- singularitysummary- what happens when our heroes don't watch their step
Note: Thanks to the person who wrote on a web page, I honestly don't remember which one, how sorry they felt for the poor slobs who had to clean up the messes the various SG teams drag back. That idea was the inspiration for this story.

What is it this time? : April 2000
summary- Top secret programs don't make good neighbors.
Content level - Older kids/Teens
season - 3, right after foothold.
Spoilers- refers to foothold and had very oblique references to Broca divide, Hathor, enigma, spirits, message in a bottle, matter of time, but nothing that would spoil the eps for you...I think the TV guide will spoil it worse.

Wormies Watch Out!!! November 2001

Season- 5ish
Spoilers - Big ones for Point of no Return, Wormhole Extreme, smaller ones for Upgrades, Divide and Conquer, Crossroads, Tokra, Enigma, Ascension, Rite of Passage and Fair Game, all very vaguely.
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- nothing too horrible. The guys are on vacation after all. There is a tiny bit of language but you hear worse on TV <G>
Summary- The military advisor for Wormhole Extreme is sent to the first annual Worm Con…mix that and my evil mind…Vancouver will never be the same.

Wrong Number December 2003

Season- any
Spoilers - None really
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- nothing too horrible.
Summary- What if the phone number for the SGC was published on NORAD's site?

It's an Experience April 2003
Season- 6
Spoilers - a sequel to 'Wormies Watch Out!!!'
Content level - Older kids/Teens
Content Warning- Little suggestiveness, much silliness
Summary- They go back to Vancouver….Wormcon 2002 will never be the same again

Many thanks to Sel and Sue for their advice. And to all the con goers who contributed to this story, even if they were 'there'. Thanks to Darren for letting me use his 'Wormguide'. Good luck to Darren in his archive and it is a great honor to be the inaugural fic.

HOME