The History of

The Demons of Stupidity

On the offchance that we have any fans of Deadheadian proportions, we offer this handy chronology of Demonic events that we would have forgotten long ago if we hadn't decided this was a good idea when we started the site. For your convenience, all historical points of interest will be written in blood red, while website dispatches are featured in this lovely shade of baby vomit green. So drink deep from the trough of trivia, and pray it doesn't push anything useful out of your mind to make room!

02-18-2000: Andy and Oscar form the short-lived "Vermin and the Drew," and record two songs at the Templeton Studio (Korn off of SYH, and the now-defunct-intro for SYH)

02-19-2000: The beaver comes to Andy and Oscar in a dream and tells them to ask Stacey to join the group.

February vacation 2000: The Demons of Stupidity form as an almost-full unit, several songs recorded at the Templeton studio. The first ever CD (Test Copy of SYH) is released in certain private sectors.

03-22-2000: The Demons perform a cover of "Dead Puppies" and their first single: "The I Got the Ebola Virus from a Crazed Monkey Blues" at Cafe Wednesday (see image at top of page)

April Vacation: The Demons finish SYH, CD sent to post production at the Templeton studio.

06-03-2000: In anticipation of the CD release, the web site is made.

06-05-2000: Perhaps the most awaited CD in the history of Parker, Save Your Hair is released to rave reviews!

06-15-2000: The Demons perform "Go Home Alabama" and Jimmy Gruesomes' "Mr. Ed" (later added to MFC) at the Big End. The CD sold out and Demons spread to world-wide fame.

06-17-2000: The new web site is up! Plans go underway for their summer tour of Massachusetts with performances planned in Templeton, Ayer, and West Townsend.

06-18-2000: The Demons get into some legal troubles following an incident in Washington DC where Chief Zabu of the mole people, inspired by lyrics in SYH, attempted to overthrow Congress. Fortunately for the United States of America, all of the Senators and Representatives were on their usual 3-hour lunch break, and the Capital Police captured the small mole army and sent them to a equally small airbase in Arizona. Oscar, Andy, and Stacey were arrested for treason, but charges were dropped after the FBI agents, President Clinton, and Madaline Albright were given copies of SYH. President Clinton is reported to say "Pardon me, but this CD sucks."

Summer 2000: Demons meet a few times, start to prepare for the second CD. This is also when the fourth Demon, Alfred (Bud) the "drummer."

10-31-2000: Demons perform a Halloween Bash in Ayer making up and releasing "The Night of the Living Dead" The now hit song got rave reviews from two 8 year-old trick or treaters dressed as the Dallas Cowboys.

New Years Eve/Day 2001: Demons meet again at the Templeton studio and finish the first rough cut of the Monkey Fear Cafe.

01-24-2001: Demons perform again at Cafe Wednesday, debuting the incredibly popular "Generic Rock Song." T-Shirts are almost sold out, and the band officialy releases the first test copy of the Monkey Fear Cafe in certain circles.

01-25-2001: The Demons are asked to be part of the first Cafe Wednesday compilation album. They later privately release the "Live at the Herbert House" tapes.

3-21-2001: Cafe Wednesday CD is released. The Demons recieve a standing-o for their performance of the "Generic Rock Song"

3-30-2001: Nothing Happened.

April Vacation 2001: Finished recording the MONKEY FEAR CAFE. Off to post.

05-11-2001: As a majority of our class is at the Prom, the Demons add a section on the site for the Monkey Fear Cafe and a section on our favorite links.

05-23-2001: NEW SECTION ADDED! Bios of the Demons!

also 05-23-2001: Official release date of Monkey Fear Cafe Announced

5-27-2001: Web Site Reborn. New Features and Links Galore!

6-3-2001: After a long wait, the Demons of Stupidity officially release MONKEY FEAR CAFE! ORDER NOW!!

7-1-2001: We just finished a long sweep of performances (well, long by our standards...) of Emily's Graduation(Guitarist Andy's sister), the June Cafe Wednesday (which featured a special tribute to Jed Lippard) and our second Parker Big End. The CD is currently SOLD OUT!!, but more are coming in soon.

8-2-2001: Just a quick shout out to all those down at badmovies.org, particularly Peter Johnson for all their good publicity. PJ was the first order to a person really outside of the Demon Community, and hopefully more orders are on the way.

8-29-2001: As the Demons of Stupidity prepare themselves for their Junior year in high school, a special MP3 Sample Kit (.zip file, roughly 3.5 MB) has been prepared for your listening pleasure. In it are two songs off of the latest CD: Monkey Fear Cafe. Download it! Put it on whatever Napster clone you use to get your MP3 fix! Spread the demonic joy! Just don't forget to tell people where you got it from!

11-23-2001: The Demons of Stupidity officialy become members of the practically brand new film studio: "Collective Fedora Films" , with head director dude and good friend Webster Batista. Look to see the Demons and their music in some of the upcoming masterpieces out of Ashby Massachusetts.

Summer, 2002: The Demons play their biggest gig ever at the Different Drummers Summer Camp in Saco, Maine. The set was so big it got an actual intermission, and the two dozen sexually frustrated middle schoolers in attendance were duly impressed. Rock!

10/21/02 - The Demons website moves, Oscar steps in as webmaster, the new CD is announced... The plot thickens...

10/22/02 - As promised, information on the Demons' BRAND NEW ALBUM! Also, the Bio Page has been completely overhauled, with all-new photos and up-to-the-minute information on those lovable demons, the Demons. Enjoy, won't you?

1/10/03 - NEW FREAKIN' SECTION! Gaze upon the beauty of THE VAULT, where we take stuff that wasn't good enough for the albums, and repackage them as collectors' items! Yay!

1/24/03 - The Demons of Stupidity make their triumphant return to the Littleton UU Church coffeehouse!

2/20/03-2/25/04 - Better known as The Week From Hell. Despite clashing schedules, way too little time, and a veritable drought of creativity, the Demons of Stupidity attempt to record a fourth album. Unfortunately, time wasn't on our side, and what little we did record represents the undeniable nadir of our existence. (One track from this week, Roberto, was eventually salvaged and posted. Keep in mind, this is the best thing we recorded that week).

3/1/04 - The Demons perform at a four-school talent show (the other three schools were The Groton School, Lawrence Academy, and Groton-Dunstable, all of which know Parker as "The gay stoner retard school"). Nothing really earth-shaking came of this performance, but I still have the date, so I'm including it here.

7/9/03 - Well, it's been a few months, so I guess it's time for another check-in...

First of all, it's past June, and there's still no new album, so I suppose we've got some 'splainin' to do. Due to a combination of conflicting schedules, overwhelming workloads, and chronic Lazy-Assedness, we just never got a chance to record very much. But don't worry-- to make it up, we're scrambling to get an album together over the summer, in hopes of maybe getting it distributed on a label of some sort. We've already recorded a few tracks, and they sound pretty sweet. You'd like 'em. In the meantime, you can still order our existing albums, Save Your Hair, Monkey Fear Cafe, and Radio Hour, if you haven't already.

But hey, onto the good news: the Demons are now, one and all, college men! On June 11th, 2003, Oscar & Andy graduated from the Parker School (Stacey's been going to Mount Wachusett Community College for a year now). This means I finally get to get rid of the closing sentences on the bios!

So, now, the question arises: What will become of the Demons of Stupidity? Well, like I said, we're working on the album over the summer, and trying to get it distributed, so there's that. After that... Well, we'll probably slow down. I don't want to say we're splitting up-- after all, Andy & I are only moving to Boston, so the three of us will probably still hang out-- but Demonic activities will probably be put on hold in favor of pursuing collegely interests. But don't worry; we'll still come back for reunion gigs at Cafe Wednesday when we're all on break. And the recording deck isn't going anywhere, so who knows? Maybe we'll get bored and do an internet-only single or something. Maybe. At any rate, I'll keep you posted on any future developments, album-related or otherwise. Rock on, and keep your squirrel monkeys spayed or neutered. - Oscar

10/21/03 - Yeah, yeah, yeah-- summer's beyond over, and we still don't have a goddamn fourth album. Before you get all up in my grill, yo, let me explain my epiphany.

We're not going to get rich being Demons. We've sold, at the most, 100 albums, at least 90 of which went to people who know us personally. Hell, right now, we can't even make new albums-- I'm the only one with the masters of the cover art, and I'm stuck in Boston with a laptop that's older than recorded sound, let alone CD burners.

"Duh," you smirk, "Did it really take you this long to realize that a lo-fi comedy band isn't a surefire economic endeavor?" To you I say, Shut up. I wasn't finished, you impatient snot.

This website has been visited by roughly 1500 people, most of whom are probably goths searching for "Demonic Activity" (I have no idea why this would happen, DEATH PAIN GOAT URINE). Chances are most of these people don't own our albums. Therefore, their only exposure to our stuff is the scant MP3s in the Vault, which were outtakes from Save Your Hair. I'll repeat that: THEY DIDN'T MAKE IT ONTO SAVE YOUR HAIR.

So where am I going with this? As an old friend of ours once said, "Hooray for communism!" That's right, from now on, we're throwing monetary gain to the wind and posting all our new stuff (as well as the best of our old stuff) for all to see in the Vault! Take that, RIAA!

So far, we've only got one track: the brand-spankin'-new pop single Soylent Green. More will probably show up around Thanksgiving, when I'll be able to mix the masters of all our new stuff. Until then, stay demonically posessed! - Oscar

7/17/04: The Demons play a set at the Concert for Willard Brook, opening for Charlie Atlas and the Sandkickers (who, completely coincidentally, featured Andy on guitar and Oscar on keyboards, and were engineered by Stacey).

11/15/04 - Wow... It's been over a year since I last updated this thing; hilariously, my last update was about all the new updates that were about to happen. Riiiight. Anyway, as webmaster/spokesman, I figure it's my duty to pretend like people actually read this and give those imaginary people a heads-up on what we've been doing.

The Demons of Stupidity, much like Jason, refuse to die. In the year since the last update, we've made sporadic appearances with no particular rhyme or reason. We had an impromptu reunion in the middle of one of Andy's solo sets at the All Asia in Cambridge (this was actually recorded-- if you ask real nice, I just might upload it). We debuted Soylent Green at Alumni Day at Cafe Wednesday. Most recently, I joined Andy on stage to perform Soylent and Narcissistic Love so I could get a free meal out of his contract.

But the biggest deal was the full freakin' set we played at the Concert for Willard Brook, a free benefit concert (wrap your head around that one!) headlined by Charlie Atlas & the Sandkickers, an ad-hoc band featuring Andy on guitar and Yours Truly on keyboards. The Demons' set went great; every person with a dog got in their cars and left during "Dead Puppies," I seriously bruised my foot kicking the mic stand across the stage, and by the end, Andy's fingers were bleeding, I sounded like I had swallowed a toilet brush, and Stacey had blown out three kazoos. In other words, it was a good show. If I were a good webmaster, I'd have posted something about this before it happened, but if you're reading this, then chances are I told you in person.

Yes, you ask, but what's new? Well, for starters, if you'd be so kind as to head over to The Vault, you'll notice that I've uploaded two brand new tracks, as well as sorted all the old downloads into a new, handy format, with all new snarky comments. Diggit.

Also, I'd be remiss if I didn't point out that Demons of Stupidity guitarist/straightman Andy Sellars has gotten hisself a page at PureVolume.com, which is sort of a more supportive, less defunct version of Mp3.com. Czech it out for the latest news and downloads from Andy's burgeoning solo career (and by the way, a little squirrel monkey told me that a certain comedy band might be getting a page there as well. Watch this space...)

Phew. This is a long update, ain't it? Consider it a release after a year of websitular constipation. I feel better now that it's out of my system. Anyway, that's about all the news that's fit to post for now, but keep watching-- There's gonna be more updates real soon! Alright? Guys? Where are you going? I'm serious this time! Come back! -Oscar

11/17/04 - You see? Two updates in two days! I'm a good webmaster! Honest!

Anyway, my little wave of inspiration has led to a sort of spring cleaning of the website. First off, I've dug through the website, ferreted out all the broken links, and either fixed or eliminated them. Secondly, I've updated the History section with all the site updates since July 2001, plus a few historical points of order that for some reason were never included as updates. Thirdly, I've gotten rid of the old "MP3 Samples" page, as it's now been completely outmoded by the Vault (which itself has been bumped up on the menu).

You may have also noticed that the goofy old "Photos" page is no longer up there. Don't worry, it wasn't thrown out with the trash-- it just moved to the BRAND NEW SECTION! Gentlemen and ladies, I humbly introduce Odds 'n' Ends, a home for all the neat little tidbits that don't quite fit anywhere else.

That's it for now. I have a bunch of stuff in the works, which I won't name quite yet so your hearts aren't broken when I lose interest and don't follow through. One thing that is on the horizon, though, is a move to a new server. Watch this space, kids. -Oscar

12/6/04 - The Demons are on PureVolume! Of course, if you're learning that here, there's not really much news for you there, but still...

12/21/04 - The Demons make their triumphant return to Parker's Cafe Wednesday, in front of a positively rabid crowd. How rabid, you ask? Click here for Oscar's harrowing account!

If you read all of that, I must say, I am very impressed. So why don't you go back and order the CDs!