As a tribute to my town, I would like to introduce my very own soap opera: As The World Turns Counterclockwise. For a few of my highly esteemed characters, I will be using replicas of my classmates. Others will be taken from my teachers, alleged family members, and even, just maybe, the very talkative voices in my head. Before you read my newly acclaimed episodes, though, be sure to read my easy plan 1, 2, 3 Step Out Of Reality of how to write your very own soap opera.
On second thought, instead of soap operas, I am going to start an anti soap opera fund. For all of you who would like to join me in my quest to do nothing, you can come and do nothing with a spiffy meaningless title! Put it on your college applications, kiddies! Anyone who has the misfortune to stumble over this page can, if you choose to accept, can be part of the AMOPGRLF (anti mutilation of perfectly good rubber laminators fund,) which supports the destruction of all soap operas and their cause. If you want, I'll even send you an imaginary loli pop that you can eat in cyber-space. Now, wouldn't that be spiffy?