There were too many requests from the golfing public to not share this one, and seeing as how Nut C. has prime viewing on this hole with all the surrounding trees it is only fair that we share his report with you all. Mike Muller shot a nine on this simple, simple par 3 on the South side and below is the map for your viewing pleasure. This travishamockery of golf was almost overlooked after all the hoopla on the previous hole when initial reports of a Sasquatch sighting only turned out to be The Load wearing half sandles and a lot of muck. Enjoy!

It is usually famine time when it comes to Hilbert Pond sucking in a golf ball or two. Most of us dread the thought of having to listen to nineteen other people have fun at our expense for the rest of the night, and the thought of possibly having our own name added to the Tom Hilbert Memorial Swamp Award at season's end is just down right un-bearable. But there is a movement afoot to rename that pond and trophy. It seems that Dickzel, despite using a precautionary iron off the North side's first tee, walloped three mighty blows in succession into that infamous tee side puddle, much to the delight of the gallery! To make matters worse (or better depending on your perspective) Dickzel even had to borrow a golf ball from his opponent after the first two went in. I'm not sure if that was because Dad is too cheap to support his own partner, or if he was just being prudent, because that one followed the first two along with some serious lawn clippings according to my field reports. With that ol' Dickzel just muttered something about giving him his ten and moved on! So the question remains! Is it still Hilbert Pond, or Dickzel Pond, or Weitzel Pond? You make the call!

OK! OK!! You got me! There were too many requests for details on this one and it really was sucky golf by your's truly.

It's almost a given that South #7 is going to make the Hole of Shame and week 6 was finally my turn! But don't get used to having your way with me being featured here anymore, even if I do stink up the joint again. This is a one shot (I mean 11 shot) deal, OK?

As you know the thunderstorm helped cool us off a little after driving everyone off the course for 30 minutes. Upon our return I was lucky enough to be able to tee off on the venerable par 5 seventh. Not wasting any time, I promptly took a mighty swing off the tee and got to watch my ball sail all of 30 feet to the left front corner of the tee.

Of course this didn't phase me other than ruining a good chance at par, so I walked up and took swing two. It was a fine skull shot that made a bee line for the roped off area filled with 2 foot high grass halfway between the tee and fairway, where it promptly died. No problem! A simple unplayable drop, and now I can get my approach shot out of the way early in the hole with a fine seven iron to the fairway. Now we're back in business!

A masterfully executed five iron leaves me in position 'A' at the top of the hill fronting the green where I can simply wedge one onto the green, drop the putt and walk away thanking my lucky stars that I won't be Hole of Shame material.

I wish!! Instead the lovely wedge bounces off the back of the green and into the thick crap barely a foot from being OB. Now my choice is go back and take unplayable again, or hack it out. Not wanting to risk a nasty bite from the plethora of snapping turtles guarding the return route, I opted to hack.

Wrong choice! I only moved the ball 4 inches on the first attempt, and sent the ball back to the front of the green on hack two! From there it was masterful putting. By the time I finished it was really a pickup ten but I opted to play it out and sank that last two footer center cut baby!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!!! You're welcome

Our first featured Hole Of Shamer for 2004 is none other than Muller T. Despite a series of lessons this spring, the gods of ugly golf were in a vengeful mood this wet and dreary Wednesday evening for the senior Muller brother.

The site was the infamous North # 4, that testy little par 3 that can humble us hackers in a heartbeat. Tom's tee shot was a nasty low screaming slice that entered Joe's Creek well right of the cart path that separates the 4th and 5th holes.

Well the only place to drop of course is behind the water but it's a very simple wedge over that to the green not counting the pine trees and sand trap that you have to also carry. So ball two is put into play, and very willingly follows ball one to it's demise. Out comes ball three, and once again into turtle territory. Now ball four comes out, after a wedge planting ceremony, and guess what! Ball four and its wet too! By this time Tom is incensed enough to hurl the wedge over the creek, which ended up drier than any of his balls did!

Tom's partner Roger is feeling pretty bad about all this by now (while I'm laughing my ass off) and tells Tom to just drop one where his club ended up on the dry side of Joe's Creek. The rest is just a couple of chips and a putt before having to pick-up and call it a hole. The rule's committee overlooked the favorable drop granted by Roger only because if we let Tom continue we would have had to rename the creek and the league!

Joe...your record still stands at five! Congratulations Muller T. on a fine display of JCGL style golf!