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Ten Second Horror Movie Reviews

In the face of dwindling attention spans, here are the fastest possible reviews of horror films (by genre) intended as a 'spot-guide' to your own horror viewing.

INSTRUCTIONS - Mouse over Mr. Spooky for the review, and mouse over the dark bar of tiny skulls for the rating.




AntiChrist/Possession Movies Demonic Movies Ghost Movies Miscellaneous Monster Movies
Mutant Movies Slasher Movies Space Monster Movies Torture Movies
Vampire Movies Werewolf Movies Witch Movies Zombie Movies








Torture Movies

RENT - A consistantly surprising movie with a good plot and, as usual, some twists to keep the raw cruelty from getting boring
3 Spookies		 Captivity
2007		 RENT - Feast for the eyes, feels much like a music video, counterplayed against a cold, grey serial killer in his lair - some nice images
3 Spookies		 The Cell
2000		 SKIP - Favored by serial killers, this competent drama plays out the desires of a kidnapper and his prey
2 Spookies		 The Collector
1965		 RENT - Feels much like a bad dream you can't get out of. Good acting and lots of tension between characters and their enviroment. Very unpredictable
3 Spookies		 Cube
1997
RENT - A new take on the trilogy featuring more math, less impressive traps, and a very entertaining ending
3 Spookies		 Cube 2: Hypercube
2002		 RENT - Takes you into the minds of the men behind the cube and their moral battles, with some very funny characters and intense traps
4 Spookies		 Cube Zero
2004		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 Entrails of a Virgin
1986		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 Hostel
2005
BUY - Less of a porno than the first movie, the sequel dives headfirst into the deepest corners of human nature and still manages to be interesting
4 Spookies		 Hostel 2
2007		 SKIP - A contrived S&M Nazi porno on the set of 'Hogan's Heroes' that's actually bad enough to be funny at times
1 Spooky		 ILSA - Shewolf of the SS
1975		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 Multiple Maniacs
1970		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 The Pit and the Pendulum
1961
RENT - Often overlooked movie with some very good scenes and solid acting. A bit confusing at times, though. Similar to 'Wolf Creek'
3 Spookies		 Rest Stop
2006		 BUY - Brilliant new idea with a completely unexpected trick ending, as well a great climax and some embarrassing acting on Cary Elwes's part
4 Spookies		 Saw
2004		 BUY - More organized and dramatic than the first, this movie's ending twist actually manages to beat the curveball from the first movie into the ground
4 Spookies		 Saw 2
2005		 BUY - A very interesting new approach at the series with a very dramatic finish. The trick ending in this one is a bit hard to understand, though, and leaves a lot of loose ends
4 Spookies		 Saw 3
2006
RENT - A bit confusing (until the end) and thought-provoking, this movie should be reserved only for hardcore fans of the series. All confusing plot-points aside, the killings are fantastic
3 Spookies		 Saw 4
2007		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 Saw 5
2008		 Taint reviewed it yet.
Review Pending...		 Saw 6
2009		 RENT - A creepy plot for a movie that is a bit cheesy at times, but is fast paced and interesting enough to keep most entertained
3 Spookies		 Turistas
2006


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