Event Reports
Tom Speaks Out
Bentonville------------------
April 2000
Bentonville was the first big battle of the new year, and it seemed to be a success. Little did we know what was in store for us on the way there. We stopped at a local Burger King on the way, and discovered that it was not Burger King at all! Seems their "burger machine" was broken. Broken!? We had no idea they made their own hamburger now.(or so it seemed).Needless to say we all got something else. We came up with more appropriate names for this place, such as, "Burger Queen, Chicken King, etc. As we ate, we discussed the situation and observed our surroundings. Then it hit us, we were in Mexico! The waitress, cooks, and other customers, were all Mexican! Seems the Mexican customers got burgers too. Oh well. We complained under our tongue and left for the event.
Where's Longstreets Corps? We arrived at the event and discovered that the confederate army was camped in the woods. We tramped up one side and down the other looking for the corps. Captain Stowe looked for the largest fire in the woods, as he knew the captain of the First Kentucky would have the usual bonfire blazing. We set up camp and settled in for the night.
Saturday morning we formed up and marched to battle. We were guided through a cotton field, the first time I had seen cotton like that. Some of us fell out to the tune of" Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" to pick cotton. What a site to see, confederate soldiers picking cotton! The battle was tense. We pushed the yanks through the woods. Once we got em running, we never let up! Some men from the green army were appearing out of no where with little cards, telling us we were wounded, dead, etc. but we paid them no mind and pressed on!
After all that hard fighting, it was time for apple pie! It was not your normal apple pie, as this apple pie contained a bit of liquor! With all cups full, it was bottoms up! After a few cups of apple pie, the singing began. Songs of all kinds were heard. All joined in and all had a most joyful time! The second day's battle did not go as well as the first, for us anyway. We popped off a few yanks, then made a gallant charge to the breastworks. The battalion was destroyed, and Sherman moved on to Durham. Oh well, we didn't changed history that day.
The battle being lost, we packed up, and headed for home. Of course, the journey home was not without incident. We stopped at another place to eat, and afterwards stood outside, to talk a bit. The next thing we knew, a car was slamming on breaks and coming to a screeching halt in the parking lot! Before he stopped, he ran over the curb only to destroy his front tire and axle! This being done, he tried gallantly to get back on the highway, but to no avail. His car did not want to cooperate and only drove in circles. We all laughed, but from the laughter came a new sound. Wendy Wilson explained the man's situation in two words. As I have promised not to disclose this information, you can ask her husband David for details. That being said and done, we all started for home.
It was good to be back in old Virginny. We were late getting back, but it was well worth it. For those who missed it, you missed a good time. We will return to Bentonville one day, and maybe next time we will change history.
-------History on the lawn--------------
This year's "History On The lawn" at the Sutherlin mansion was a success. Major Snyder had his trusty sidekick, Richard II with him. Little did we know that Richard was "The Dark Lord of the South. "Ask Lester for details. There were drills, fireing demonstrations, camp life, etc.
Saturday was the usual camp life activities. When nighttime came, it was time for Captain Stowe's own version of apple pie. (See recipe below)His version was even better than the First Kentucky's version. David and I were assigned to gather up the ingredients. Being South Bostonians, and not knowing Danville that well, we had a time finding the liquor. We took the scenic route to get it, and drove for what seemed like hours. Only after we returned to camp did we find out we were only a few miles from the place! Oh well, thus ever it be to us "Halifax County people."
Lawfully wedded husband and wife?
We were all pleased to see Starlett Boswell and Cpl. Josh Austin "take the vows". Starlett" walked down the isle" to wed her future husband, Josh. The ceremony took place in front of the waterfall on the grounds of the mansion, which provided a beautiful backdrop. Major Snyder performed the ceremony. (Lord help em!)Lets all pray they have a happy future together.
We also witnessed the first amputation, on yours truly. Lester performed the task, of course, and removed my leg at the knee. I was screaming as he was sawing. Hearing that saw cut through the bone was not a comforting sound. As I passed out from the pain, my mutilated leg was simply tossed out to the crowd. With sounds of astonishment, the crowd stepped back and wondered if it was all real. As I made my way back to my tent, I was amazed to see that my leg was intact and I could walk again! How Lester managed that, we may never know.
If that wasn't enough for `em, Sunday, I was put on report by Cpl. Brooks for insubordination, bad, example to the men, and disruption in the ranks! I was made to wear the ball and chain for a while. Beau and David tried to defend me, but it was to no avail. It was rumored that Wendy was the one who convinced the Major to chain me up. The truth about it is still "in the air."
With Sunday, came the rain, and we all decided it was time to say good-bye once more. We broke camp, packed up, and headed for home. We all had fun, and now look forward to the next event.
How to make apple pie----
1 gallon of cloudy apple cider
1 jar of cinnamon sticks
1 lb. of sugar
100 proof smearnoff vodka
Until next time,
Sgt./Reporter
Tom Ward
