 |
This page is best viewed with browser setting at 800x600 fully maximized & with 32-bit True color. |
 |
|
This page is best viewed with browser setting at 800x600 fully maximized & with 32-bit True color. |
|
Training
with Guest Speaker, Lady D of PEP Atlanta
(continued from previous page)
Dungeon Chat is held Wednesday Evenings 9-11 EST in the Dungeon @ Fantassia's Palace.
All are welcome with the understanding that we all have the right to disagree without being disagreeable.
(following text has been edited ~ foregoing greetings, etc.)
Wed Mar 15 8:05:18 2000
~nadine~: this is all so new . .never heard of certificates before. Have heard of learning collars for v/t schools but never certificates. Interesting.
Lady D enters and the open forum section of Q&A begins here.
Wed Mar 15 8:06:02 2000
LADYDPEP: THIS IS LADY D
Wed Mar 15 8:07:10 2000
Harpoon: Evening Lady D.
Wed Mar 15 7:49:49 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: well . . *light laugh*Lady D HAS arrived . .. due to the miracle of electronic coaching . . .
the floor is open
Wed Mar 15 8:07:38 2000
LES IS MORE(m): Welcome, Lady D
Wed Mar 15 8:07:44 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: Lady D....You keep referring to submissives as slaves...can't a person be a submissive without being a slave?...
Wed Mar 15 8:08:18 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: greetings Lady D...
Wed Mar 15 8:08:47 2000
~*~baileyi~*~: curtseys gracefully and lowers her eyes with the
greatest of respect to Lady D.
Wed Mar 15 8:09:01 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: (Let me make one quick note: The prior
interview was cut and paste ~ and Lady D was not here to read most of it . . . )
Wed Mar 15 8:09:55 2000
LADYDPEP: In response to an earlier question, yes, submissives do not necessarily have to be slaves, I tend to use the term interchangeably because my submissives are my slaves. Slaves denotes ownership and not all submissives belong to someone...
Good evening everyone, it truly is a pleasure to be here and speaking with you
Wed Mar 15 8:11:16 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: thank You for that clarification Lady D...
Wed Mar 15 8:12:22 2000
LADYDPEP: This is so cool, especially for someone like myself who is completely unknown to this thing I am using......I think it is called a computer, lol
Wed Mar 15 8:12:45 2000
The Henchman's falon: ~*charm*~ smiling hello to my sis..patting the pillow beside me for her to join Master an i as we listen to Lady D~
Wed Mar 15 8:13:07 2000
interesting one's~*bambi*~: ~laughs softly~ is that what it's called! i barely know it myself.
Wed Mar 15 8:13:23 2000
Harpoon: Fair warning, a lot of real life BDSM gets really muddled here and in other chat sites on-line.
Fantasy role play is prefectly fine if you want to do that, but the fantasy can vary a LOT from what is "true to life" in BDSM.
Wed Mar 15 8:13:46 2000
LES IS MORE(m): Lady D welcome to the internet where the
MEN are MEN and so are half the women
Wed Mar 15 8:14:29 2000
interesting one's ~*bambi*~: ~bol at LIM~
Wed Mar 15
LADYDPEP: I will try to answer questions but be patient until I
can acclimate myself to this.......
Wed Mar 15 8:16:59 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: Lady D from LES IS MORE:
Do you find that the over abunance of male subs to females subs can be explained by the June Cleaver style of submission satisfying most females rt in their marriage?
In other words they submit to their husbands like good little wives as society requires.
Wed Mar 15 8:19:07 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: Lady D or ~CC~...i am ~*~the light{MDS}~*~...apryl will do as well...i have a question...although You are not particularly into the S&M aspect of the lifestyle which is primarily what Thee MARQUIS and i practice...i have a problem with welting...the problem is...i don't welt...i bruise...but that is it...how or what can be done to fix this...so that i can welt?
Wed Mar 15 8:20:52 2000
LADYDPEP: Well, Les, I think that since we live in a male dominated society, women are expected to be submissive. I came from a home where my parents were married for 61 yrs and Mom taught me that my job was to make my man happy and that did not at all take into account my happiness.
However, I always knew that this was not for me and I think that women are becoming more assertive and all realize that they want more than to be subservient to a man, at work and also at home.
Wed Mar 15 8:23:40 2000
LES IS MORE(m): Lady D and what about the poor woman that likes being JUNE CLEAVER?
Wed Mar 15 8:23:59 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: ~*~the light~*~ agrees with Lady D...submission by gender...not by pleasure or choice~
Wed Mar 15 8:24:33 2000
LADYDPEP: Although I have no problem with those women who still do like to be subservient, lol, more playthings.....hmmm, sounds good, don't you think?
Wed Mar 15 8:26:17 2000
LES IS MORE(m): Lady D I agree
Good night and some day hope to get into a deep discussion on mind sets in the future. D/s
Wed Mar 15 8:27:48 2000
LADYDPEP: Apryl, about your welting and bruising.....our bodies are what they are and some people don't show welts very easily but if you are really difficult to show signs and you want them and many subs do, it is the instrument that will cause a welt so I would need to see how your body responds but some things will probably show welts.
Wed Mar 15 8:28:11 2000
~delphinium~: but as in some cases, it is possible to be dominant in all things dealing with a relationship except when it deals with sexuality, i know for myself i run the the household and make all the decisions but want my partner to be dominant in our relationship, it is a hard balancing act at the best of times
Wed Mar 15 8:29:24 2000
LES IS MORE(m): Apryl also you should have a good physical as easy bruising can be a sign of problems
Wed Mar 15 8:29:50 2000
~nadine~: delphinium: very true, its not easy to balance is it?
Wed Mar 15 8:30:18 2000
LADYDPEP: I totally agree and that is why there are no absolutes
because you will find that in this lifestyle what works for one will not for another and vice versa.....
Wed Mar 15 8:30:32 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: ~*~the light{MDS}~*~
Lady D...Thee MARQUIS has a fondness for leather...so that is what is used...ie...crop..whip..cat~o~nine...even a paddle and yardstick...i am a bit heavy...would that have anything to do with the lack of welting?...also...i do get welts from rope burns...wrists and ankles...
i do not bruise easily Les...it takes an awful lot of dead-on blows for me or welt..usually with the crop or paddle...yardstick sometimes..
i was told that a 'lucite' rod would help to make me welt
Wed Mar 15 8:32:26 2000
LADYDPEP: Some people can switch and some want that control taken away, at least in the bedroom and that is ok, if that works..you know, if it ain't broke, don't try to fix it...I was just the opposite, I was telling people what to do all day at work, 12 to 14 hrs and I just couldn't see myself coming home and saying, now honey, what would you like me to do?
Wed Mar 15 8:34:31 2000
dea{TNT}FG: i agree with my sister delpi....i own a business and am very dominant in my public life....but i crave a man's dominance and strength and it is freeing to give my power over to one i trust who still allows me to be myself but understands well how to feel this part of me
Wed Mar 15 8:34:57 2000
Harpoon: Lucite (in the shape of a rod) is like a cane. Lucite's easier to come by than canes which will stand up to be used in a BDSM setting... I gather it's cheaper too, but I've never looked into that.
There are some materials I've heard of being used for "caning" that are VERY bad though. Best to test things out first before trying to bring out welts on a subbie's rump.
Wed Mar 15 8:34:59 2000
~delphinium~: ~nadine~no i find it very hard at times, like today, i had to find and replace a water storage tank and i got it done without his help, he was at work, but when it comes to "O/our time" i want him in the dominant
Wed Mar 15 8:35:29 2000
LADYDPEP: I don't think that your size has anything to do with welting or not, it is your skin type, the lucite rod may do it and a cane should also, leather usually does not leave welts if your skin is difficult to welt unless it is a singletail.
Wed Mar 15 8:36:33 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: the light, ~ arnica montana, ~ an herbal supplement, is often used to reduce bruising
Wed Mar 15 8:36:48 2000
dea{TNT}FG: willow cane?
Wed Mar 15 8:37:04 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: ~*~the light{MDS}~*~ thank You Harpoon...i have never looked into lucite...was told of it only last night...i have never been struck with a cane...guess that could be tried as well...i do so want to welt...~sighs~...it disappoints me that i don't .
Wed Mar 15 8:38:03 2000
~delphinium~: ~dea~nods, yes that is what it is like for me , aftyer 5aking care of everything in the day to day running i want to give over and be His ,to enjoy being what i am, strange but true *hug*
Wed Mar 15 8:38:16 2000
dea{TNT}FG: willow used to work quite well for my grandma......i welted.....
Wed Mar 15 8:38:24 2000
MARQUIS DE SADE: ~*~the light{MDS}~*~
thank You ~CC~ and Lady D...Your suggestions are greatly appreciated....and ~CC~...i know they are bad for me....but i like the bruises...
Wed Mar 15 8:38:37 2000
LADYDPEP: I have a friend that is a professional dominatrix and really enjoys it but is a collared slave in her personal life so I tip my hats off to those of you that can make that kind of a transition, it is not always easy but personally I think that you probably have the best of both worlds
Wed Mar 15 8:39:09 2000
dea{TNT}FG: delphinium....yes, we understand each other, sister
Wed Mar 15 8:40:28 2000
Harpoon: the light, Caning can be VERY intense. From what I understand (I don't have practical experience in caning), it's rare for a submissive to be able to take more than a few solid blows from a cane.
I did have a chance to watch a cane being used on a submissive once. Thee's a lot of technique that can be applied to a cane, but this submissive only took 3 or 4 hard blows from the cane, the rest were eithier teases or from other impliments...
Afterwards the submissive was pretty worked up and it took her a while (half an hour maybe?) to come back down from the scene.
Wed Mar 15 8:43:06 2000
~delphinium~: ~Lady D~, perhaps but some times it does not feel that i have the best, it is oft times confusing, and also since he is not a Dominant ,"am bringing this out in him slowly" i find myself very frusytrated at times
Wed Mar 15 8:43:47 2000
LADYDPEP: Caning is definitely something that takes training but you can cane someone for quite a while if you build them up and if you cane them correctly. Caning is something that you don't just feel immediately, it radiates throughout your body and so you need to wait between strokes
Wed Mar 15 8:46:11 2000
dea{TNT}FG: delphinium: that is hard, delphi, because it is hard to be sub when you are controlling the training.....the Master i hope to be with someday 24/7 is experienced and we have been talking for a long time about this....
Wed Mar 15 8:46:14 2000
Harpoon: Lady D, I guess it's all in the application...
Wed Mar 15 8:47:14 2000
LADYDPEP: All relationships take work and d/s ones more than most but when you feel confused and frustrated, discuss with someone in a similar circumstance or better yet, someone who has gone through that and now is on an even stance and that will at least help you to alleviate some of the frustration. That is why I am all for support groups.....of all types because there is safety and comfort and understanding and acceptance in numbers......
Wed Mar 15 8:49:37 2000
~delphinium~: ~dea~, i am not controlling the training so much as letting him know my needs and letting him decide on how to act, he is definately Dominant but just hasn't figured it all out yet *ss* i almost wonder at times if he is shy to act on it thinking i may not like it, i try and ease new things in to our life slowly and he has been quite good at responding, tis just a slow process for me , and i also am married to him r/t.
Wed Mar 15 8:49:56 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: ~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: Lady D ~ I feel that PEP is an
accepting, nurturing place . . that encompases both education, support and fun.
Does it get any better than that? *S*
Wed Mar 15 8:51:40 2000
LADYDPEP: When a dominant is new, they have many insecurities and they do not always know how to be dominant, even if their natural proclivity is that.....before I was formally trained, I met a sub who taught me so much, in essence the student taught the teacher but he did so tactfully and tastefully and never made me feel that I was the student.
Wed Mar 15 8:54:22 2000
~delphinium~: ~Lady D~ *smiles softly* thank you for those words
Wed Mar 15 8:55:03 2000
dea{TNT}FG: delphinium....sounds like you two have the makings of something really good then....patience will be worth it
Wed Mar 15 8:55:15 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: Lady D ~ as delphinium said she "knows"
he is dominant . . .but dominant does not necessarily denote Dom . . .
Lady D . . .what was the most significant thing that the submissive taught you? (question from the galleries) *winks at Alabaster Femme*
Wed Mar 15 8:56:13 2000
LADYDPEP: Now being married puts even a third equation into this since you can be his sub but at times that needs to be put aside when you need to be his wife, if a dom comes home and says we are going to buy a 200,000 dollar house and you know that you can only afford a 100,000 dollar house, that is not the time to say, yes sir, anything you say.....so the dynamics just constantly change but isn't that what makes this so exciting anyway?
Wed Mar 158:58:10 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: Lady D ~ this is from Barracuda:
I would like to know, when she starts travelling while getting spanked, do I stop, do I continue....do I move to another part of the body,... because she is unaware of her level of pain.....thank You..*s*
Wed Mar 15 8:58:56 2000
LADYDPEP: The most significant thing that he taught me was that I could be myself and let my natural dominant personality surface and that I didn't have to be a hardass, cold, brass and unloving dom, the way they are usually portrayed in the fantasy magazines
Wed Mar 15 8:59:34 2000
~delphinium~: ~Lady D ~ that is exactly my point, i control all those aspects of Our life, it would be me who bought the house *g*
Wed Mar 15 9:00:08 2000
LADYDPEP: And thank you for your comment about PEP, I try very hard to make it an educational place but also one that is comfortable for EVERYONE....
Wed Mar 15 9:00:40 2000
Alabaster Femme: LadyD, I'd wither if I couldn't be playful. I *like* my laugh lines!
Wed Mar 15 9:01:18 2000
LADYDPEP: Good, Delphi, that's one less argument (smile)
Wed Mar 15 9:02:25 2000
~delphinium~: ~Lady D~ *soft chuckling*
Wed Mar 15 9:04:55 2000
LADYDPEP: Now that depends, travelling does not necessarily mean that they have reached their pain tolerance, have you ever tried to stay still while someone was beating your ass......some people react differently and you can tell whether you need to move more by the physical body and what it looks and feels like and also you have to know how your sub reacts, she may be a mover and likes to squirm, I have one that does and she is never saying enough, just likes to jump around.....
My girl loves spankings and squirms but she still
wants more spanking.
Wed Mar 15 9:06:55 2000
~ecstasy~{H}: LADYDPEP, may i ask..in Your opinion..during a scene, i am a counter..i count everything (yes, i am compulsive) however, tend to be very quiet and very still..have You found this common and does it create a problem?
Wed Mar 15 9:07:47 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: Lady D ~
Would you please tell us more about the formality of your training? That which you received and that which you give?
Wed Mar 15 9:08:24 2000
LADYDPEP: Feel her butt and see if she has any bruising or how warm it is to the touch and when all else fails, ask, if she cannot handle anymore, unless they are in a place where they cannot communicate, she will tell you
Ecstasy, when you are counting are you doing this to yourself or out loud and are you counting strokes or what?
Wed Mar 15 9:12:11 2000
~ecstasy~{H}: LADYDPEP i count to myself and it is everything that i count..my Masters breaths..strokes..footsteps..and then i am unaware of what He is doing..
Wed Mar 15 9:14:20 2000
LADYDPEP: The training that I offer is not as regimented as what I went through and basically I talk to find out what type of training is needed and we train in those areas. My classical training was extensive and very similar to old guard training, regimented, stressing respect, ettiquette and manners
If counting helps you to get into head space, then by all means count away, however, if it takes away from your Master and his communication with you, that is the only time that I see it as a problem.
Wed Mar 15 9:16:43 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: ~ looking at the clock ~
Thank you so very much for coming this evening Lady D . . .and all that have participated in the discussion either with questions or listening in the shadows.
Wed Mar 15 9:17:59 2000
LADYDPEP: Thank you Chrysalis, you provide a wonderful
service to the community and I wish you all the best........
Wed Mar 15 9:19:00 2000
Harpoon: LadyD, ecstasy is My submissive, in real life and on-line.
She counts EVERYTHING, it seems to be part of her sub-space experience.
When W/we're in a scene she becomes VERY aware of her surroundings, a hyper-sensitivity. She counts blows from a flogger or paddle or My bare hand, and she also counts My footsteps, breathing... Ticking of a clock if it can be heard...
Wed Mar 15 9:19:04 2000
LADYDPEP: Good night all and I look forward to the opportunity to speak with you again.....keeping love in the lifestyle.....Lady D
Wed Mar 15 9:20:05 2000
~*~baileyi~*~: wishing You a wonderful world LADYDPEP.. *soft
smile* and thank you for Your insight
Wed Mar 15 9:20:15 2000
~sara~: from one who is listening...thank you *S*
Wed Mar 15 9:21:36 2000
Harpoon: LadyD, I haven't noticed that her counting limits O/our
communication during a scene.
I'm VERY aware of her body language and other "clues" as to how she's doing during a scene and when I need to ask her something she answers just fine...
I will say though that the communication W/we have during scening has taken some work and most of that's been done OUTSIDE of the "bedroom"
Wed Mar 15 9:23:31 2000
TheHenchman's falon: I have enjoyed your views very
much and please come back again soon Ma'am......thank You
Wed Mar 15 9:27:24 2000
Harpoon: Goodnight Lady D, thank you for joining U/us.
Wed Mar 15 9:27:32 2000
~Cyberotica-Chrysalis~: keep watching the BRC for the Topic of the week . .
Oh, and there is now a forum up on the site as well . . . your participation is what it is all about.
Mirror site: http://www.thebrc.net/
Sign The Guestbook 
View The Guestbook
Sign The Dreambook 
Read The Dreambook