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Who the Hell is That Guy? It's Tien!
Every once in a while, I see this guy walking around while I'm watching DBZ. All I know about him, is that his name is Tien, and he has some big long Japanese name too. If anyone else knows more about Tien than that, they have no life, and I pity them.
Ok, so like, what the hell does this guy have ANYTHING to do with the series? Oh yeah, the other thing I know is that Vegeta killed him. Why Bulma? Why did you bring him back? He did nothing! I haven't seen him in the Buu saga yet...So like, where the hell did he go? Does anyone care?
To add to the uselessness of this character, we also have his little fuck puppet Chauzou(I don't know how to spell it and I don't care). Ok, like, when they were brought back to life again, Chauzou was all over Tien and hugging him and crying. First of all, they were together in death and were never apart for two seconds, so what the hell was the big deal??! I think those two have a lil something goin on....SIIIIIICK!
What else can we say about Tien? Hmmm... He has three eyeballs...for what reason? Who knows. Ok, WHY does he have THREE eyes??!! It doesn't do anything...it just sits there lookig creepy. I mean, I here about how you need to open your third eye to use your ki and everything, but I think this guy took it too literally...Plus, it's ugly, and he could never score with anyone else other than some painted clown puppet that's emporer of nothing.(What is he the emporer of anyways? C'mon all you Chauzou fans...you very few...)
I heard rumors about how Tien used to be evil. What kind of a villian was he? Did he pull his pants down to terrify everyone? I mean, how was he a threat of any kind? Did he scare everyone away with his scary triangles? I mean, I could probably kill Tien because he would just be standing there, checking all the guys out with his three eyes, then I'd poke him and he'd die. Then poor Chauzou would cry and kill himself and there'd be this whole Romeo and Juliet scene. And then no one would notice because everyone would be off fighting, you know, actually DOING something. Ok, back to what I was saying......Did he hurt Goku or something? I mean, did he rape him in his sleep or something? What else could this guy do? I mean, he's more worthless than Yamucha....and that's bad. Hell, I'm more afraid of Puar than I am of Tien. Hell, Oolong is more threatening than Tien! What I'm trying to say is, this guy, um, Tien I think his name is, he had to be the shittiest villian ever because he is such a HAH! Loser! As Vegeta would say.
There have been rumors of Tien joining Rockafella Records, and using the Rockafella symbol to attack others. He was also rumored to be at parties, mostly with Jay-Z. Those two are notorious for using the Rockafella symbol, as a sign of advertising Rockafella Records. We think that Tien uses his "triangle" attack to in fact, advertise Rockafella and promote his new album entitled, "Chauzou's hot." and his new single, "I suck". Look at the photographic evidence...what do YOU believe?
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