the engineer hymn

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     With clear voice and strong heart, every true engineer will belt out this song for all to hear. Many schools have many 'strains' of this song, as it apparently migrated around the world. Nicknamed "Godiva", it seems to have originated from somewhere in Great Britain. Here's the 1997-1998 McMaster Official Censored Unisex Version:

Chorus:
We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we can, we can demolish forty beers,
So come, so come, so come, so come, ¹ so come along with us,
For we don't give a damn for any old man who don't give a damn for us ².

"I've come a long, long way" she said, "and I will go as far
With the one who takes me from this horse and leads me to a bar"
The ones who took her from her steed and stood her to a beer,
Were a blurry-eyed surveyor and a drunken Engineer.

My father was a miner from the Northern Malamute,
My mother was a mistress in a house of ill repute,
They kicked me out at a tender age, not shedding any tears,
And said, "To McMaster you son of a gun ³, and join the Engineers!"

The army and his navy pals set out to have some fun,
Down at the tavern where the fiery liquids run;
But all they found were empties, for the Engineers had come,
And traded all their instruments for gallon jugs of rum.

Sir Francis Drake and all his ships set out for Calais Bay,
They heard the Spanish rum fleet was heading out that way,
But the Engineers had beat them by a night and half a day,
And although as drunk as hooligans you could still hear them say;

An artist and an Engineer once found a gallon can,
Said the artist to the Engineer: "Outdrink me if you can."
The artist took three drinks and died; his face was turning green,
But the Engineer kept on going; it was only gasoline.

Now Venus was a statue made entirely of stone,
There's not a fig leaf on her, she's as naked as a bone;
On noticing her arms were broke, an Engineer discoursed,
"She's a busted hunk of concrete and she should be reinforced."

Elvis was a legend, he's the King of Rock and Roll,
But the life he was leading, well it finally took its toll,
He realized too late that he chose the wrong career,
So he faked his death, and came to MAC, he's now an Engineer!

An Engineer once came to school so drunk and ever late,
He was carrying a load that you'd expect to ship by freight,
The only thing that held him up and kept him on his course,
Were the boundary conditions and electromotive force.

On reading Kama Sutra, a man learned position nine
For proving masculinity it surely was divine
But then one night the girl rebelled and kicked him on his rear
For he was a feeble artsie and she was an Engineer.

So now you've heard our story, and you know we're engineers, ⁴
We love to love each other ⁵, and we love to drink our beers.
We drink to everyone that comes from far or near,
'Cause we're helluvahelluvahelluvahelluvahelluva Engineer!

...In other words, Lady Godiva is the goddess of Engineering.

A nurse ⁶ and an Engineer were sitting in a park
The Engineer was busy doing research late after dark,
His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
While his right hand wrote the figures, his left hand traced the curves.

I happened once upon a maid whose eyes were full of fire,
Her physical endowments would have made your hands perspire,
She shocked me when she told me that she never had been kissed,
For her boyfriend was a tired Engineering Physicist.

Now Caesar went to Egypt at the age of fifty-three,
But Cleopatra's blood was warm, her heart was young and free,
And every night when Julius said goodnight at three o'clock,
There was a Roman Engineer just waiting 'round the block

There are at least two more verses out there, but they're way too randy to post.

1. Sometimes the "so come"'s are replaced by "drink rum"'s.
2. This line was censored. Let's just say that we're not giving a something else, and we don't refer to the old man as a guy at all.
3. You can probably guess what has been censored here.
4. Almost every school has a different last verse.
5. Generally, each of us will substitute "each other" with "our men" or "our women" - depending on your preference - but then it gets garbled.
6. Some universities use "maiden" instead. However, as legend goes, nurses always pair up with engineers.

Engineers have many other chants and songs from their respective universities, but most of them are probably too off-colour to put down here.

Note: I am, in no way, condoning or endorsing the consumption of alcohol (Heck, I don't even drink!), irresponsible drinking, (fe)male chauvanistic behaviour, or the trading of expensive drafting tools for rum jugs. It really is just a song. Thank you.