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11/27/01 ~ Luke
Tonight......tonight is not a good night. Tonight
everything is where it should not be. . .
11/27/01 ~ Luke
Children, this is a call to arms!! The time
has come for us to unite in pursuit of a common goal, a common
destiny even. We need to put aside our petty differences and
achieve the challenge ahead of us. For it is greater than
any one of else will ever be on our own, we need to stand
together, and defy the odds. The Hooray for Boobies™
section at Luke's Domain must open!! Ladies send pics of your
boobies, and hurry! There isn't much time left, we need boobies,
and we need them now .
Just to give a sample of what we're looking for, I've included
a promo picture. Sorry, not gonna let you guys enlarge this
one. The real boobie section won't be censored either. So
there you have it. SEND BOOBIE PICS!!!! We need to get this
section up and running, believe me it's for the greater good
of humanity. So ladies it's up to you, send me some pics,
get your friends to do the same. And guys, I know you've all
got some boobie pics laying around somewhere. Get them over
here, and I'll open up the new section ASAP.
On a lighter note, look at Paul!! Ah ha ha ha. . .
That's all for today kids, go,
play, have fun. Send pics!
11/26/01 ~ Luke
I know that I have not posted in a while, sorry
I'm lazy. Well I trust that everyone had a good holiday, I
did. I went to Illinois and checked out my parents new house,
it's a nice place. My favorite part of the house is the small
sticker on the front window that says, "No Solicitors,
No Peddlers allowed on property." The fuck is that all
about?!? Anyway, I have nothing to give you in this post,
but I do have some pics of me and some of my friends from
college. I'll have more for you tomorrow I promise.
Happy people at college, so
here we go from left to right: Nate (Blingo),
Kelly, me; Half of Alex, and me again. Sorry kids, that's
all I have for now. Keep it real.
11/20/01 ~ Luke
It's almost Thanksgiving, I suppose I should
gives thanks for some things that mean a lot to me. I'm thankful
for my health, my friends, my dick, my
drums , my car, my.........
Bah!! I must have fallen asleep. As I'm sure you did, like
anyone gives a shit what I'm thankful for. On a lighter note,
Porno Tuesday™ is something that has become a regular
event in my dorm. For a full report I'll direct you to my
boy Blingo.
He'll fill you in on the
story of Porno Tuesday™. Look at Paul, he's so happy
with his new XBOX. See me in the background, right in front
of my nose is a pic of Britney Spears on the wall, in case
you were interested. This is kinda a pointless post, so I
think I'll just leave you with some things that I've been
kicking around in my head. Why do television shows do translations
for foreign interviews and such into American but yet keep
an accent of that language on the translation? I find that
fucking stupid. Why do people go to fast food restaurants;
order a double cheese burger, super sized fries, and a large
diet coke? That just goes to show you how stupid the
general public is. Don't act so surprised, you've all done
it at some point. Why is it that I have ranted on about nothing
for this long? And why have you kept on reading it? I just
don't have the answers for these questions, so I'm going to
go play some GTA III in the hopes that blowing shit up, shooting
cops, and stealing cars will bring me the answers I seek.
Happy Thanksgiving, and good night.
11/19/01 ~ Luke
Well it started out better than we had anticipated.
Out of the 30 XBOXs that came into Cadillac, our group got
12. With so many of these in our possession we felt pretty
good  about
ourselves. And then we went to eBay and realized nobody wanted
them. Which is a real shame cause I really wanted a lot of
money. I ended up making about $150, which is still money
I did nothing to earn, but hey I wanted a lot more.
Man did we ever do a lot of driving in last few 5 days. We've
been up and down this state, just to find out what we already
knew. . . THIS STATE FUCKING SUCKS GOAT ASS!! Seriously, I
hate this state, I moving to Idaho. That's about all I have
on that, draw your own conclusions. So we were at WMU for
the weekend, and in that time we fucked some major shit up.
We dropped a computer down a hill, beer bottles down six floors,
and threw caramel apples at people. I guess there was some
football game or something, and I guess that we lost. But
hey, I don't give a fuck. "Hey, our network runs at 2kbps,
should we update our systems to perhaps a respectable network??"
"What?!?! Fuck no!! The football team hasn't had new
uniforms in 3 days, they're never going to be playoff material
if we don't get them new uniforms." Anyway...I hate this
place. Good fight, good night.
11/14/01 ~ Luke and Ryan
Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you the
wisdom of Alex Correa, "FUCK EM' IN DA EAR!!" There
you have it, straight up from CMU. The wonderful things $10,000
a year can teach a person. Such as: calling a person an "Anal
Astronaut" is wrong. While having non-consenting
anal sex with the cheerleading squad is sometimes acceptable.
Aside from all of this CMU is a mother fucking joke. The apex
of corruption and greed, I have a feeling politics took over
education a long time ago. Care to argue, try paying $50 to
park a 1/2 mile away while two lot's sit unused less than
a 100 yards away. But my personal favorite is something I
learned just this weekend from one of my professors. The teachers
and staff here at CMU must also pay $50 to park in their own
place of employment. How fucking stupid is that. I'm mostly
just pissed because of the slow Internet connections and fat
stupid bitches living next door.
The day has arrived. Tonight a talented young group of men
will embark on a journey of wit and perseverance Tonight capitalism
shall be extorted for all it's worth. Tonight the world shall
be ours. Or at least some XBOXs. We're heading to Wal-Mart
in Cadillac, MI to camp out for the night and buy XBOXs when
the store opens in the morning. We will be the proud owners
of these for a day at most, seeing as we are selling them
on ebay that night. Although it may be necessary to act like
hard asses for 10 hours, fending off skinheads and one-toothed
farm folk. We will be victorious, and we will make much money.
Expect a full report in the next few days, hopefully with
a slew of pics if we can get our hands on a digital camera.
So from Ry ry and I, peace out. We're off to get rich!
11/11/01 ~ Luke
Hey your all in luck. I've completed this weeks
clip
of the week, and hopefully it isn't going to be a bitch
this time. Well I recently got my first credit card and I
already hate it. Upon applying for my credit card online,
the site told me I would receive a call to make sure that
I really applied for this card. Understandable, but when I
called I basically had to go through the whole application
procedure again due to the fact that the a certain credit
card company who shall remain nameless can't read a damn address
to save their lives. The company surely had enough CAPITAL
ONE would think.  But
since I'm not gonna say their names, we'll just leave it like
it is. After that bull shit, I got a letter in the mail from
the fraud dept. of the nameless company. Stating that I needed
to send like 6 forms of ID and a fucking utility bill in before
they would lift the hold placed on my account. All of this
had happened before I even had a chance to use my card once.
It's nice to see that companies treat new customers like crap
before they even start doing business with them. I find it
assuring, a new form of marketing almost. They don't lie to
you, they let you know that your just another fucking idiot.
I kinda like that. But needless to say, I got the hold lifted
without going through the shit dance of the major corporations
annual crap on society festival. Way to go me.
The new site will be up soon. I'm waiting until after my xbox
adventure, and then that will become my primary project. Until
next time kids, enjoy the clip of the week. Drop me a line
sometime. . .
11/09/01 ~ Luke
Well my children the day grows ever closer.
This day of course is the release of Xbox, I'm quite excited
for the event. Not that I give a shit about the system, but
because it means much money
for myself and some of my boys. We're camping out in front
of Wal-Mart for a day to get our own copy and selling them
that night on ebay. Hooray for us, hooray for money, and hooray
for the stupid fucks willing to pay four times the face value
to get one. We've made a couple different versions of the
auction site, all stressing the holiday theme. Cause ever
good parent knows that Billy must have an Xbox under the tree
this Christmas. Check out my Xbox
auction site layout, and let me know what you think.
Well some of the fellas and I took a trip to the Midland Mall
tonight, and guess what??!!?? It really fucking sucked! That
is a horrible mall, and Midland is a stupid place. It's sad,
the place reminded me of Cadillac with a Mall in place of
a Prevo's or something. Rednecks everywhere, mullet mania,
inbreeding infomercial. Yes it's true, all this and more is
available to you today in Midland. But you must act quickly,
these wonderful people might get lost in there own ignorance.
Robbing you, the consumer, from the chance of a lifetime to
understand why America is what it is today. These hillbillies
collectibles have a limit of 1 per customer to ensure to no
reproduction of the phenomenon is possible. Not much else
to bitch about tonight, so I'll leave you with that. Check
ya lata.
11/06/01 ~ Luke and Ryan
My bad, I know its been awhile since my last
post, but I'll try and make up for it tonight. 
So Ry ry and I were sittin around his dorm
earlier tonight brewing up the fine details for the newest
and greatest infomercial of all time. We dabbled through dreams
of shoes that never untie, and paper clips made for graham
crackers. I was browsing the National Archives to assure these
inventions weren't already in circulation when I happened
to stumble across a forgotten society. One of honor and prestige,
one who's message was pure and true. For the first time in
many years, we brought light upon the pages of the United
Legion of Mennonites for a Paul Free Society. 
This group struck a chord with Ryan and I, and we now are
proud affiliates of said organization. Now I understand what
a vast wealth of organizations like this may be claiming to
be "legit", but believe me this is the real deal.
Nobody hates Paul more than the UTMPFS. Act now and you yourself
can become a proud member as an official Paul provoking warrior
like us. Join here!!
And join TODAY!! You and only you can make the difference
in the war against Paul. Sign up today!
Just so you know, I'm leaving Speedy the Rabbit takes a ride
up for another week. I pretty sure that it deserves it. Well
people, it's late and everyone else is playing GTAIII, so
I think I'm gonna sign off for now, keep it real and drop
me a line.
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