"Blessed Be The Mall..." March 24, 2000

"Blessed Be The Mall..." March 24, 2000

Well After Midnight...

.....okay, not too much after midnight, but it feels like it. The ache in my lower back, the headache that I have been fending off all day, my arthritic ankle, are all yelling at me that it ought to be well after midnight, and that I as well ought to be getting some sleep. The Goddess, having stayed up probably too late for her in light of trying to reverse insomniac tendencies, is just now settling into bed. She had a big day, but a bigger one in store tomorrow.

For both of us.

She did not get much sleep last night; after getting out of bed due to feeling resless, she subsequently fell asleep on the couch to the television blaring. Such was the state I found her in when I got up this morning to get the overnight client ready for school.

When she is overtired, she is prone to fits of irrationality, is highly emotional and much too sensitive. No matter how innocent the statements I make about anything, and even if I try not to say anything but the most general thing, she is bound to start crying.

Today was no different, and I ended up apologising all over the place, only to have her remind me how insensitive she thought I was being, had been, and would likely be. So, in order to get through the evening with a shred of sanity, few tears, and definitely none of the fighting that was burgeoning, I did the only thing I could do.

I took her shopping.

Which, truth be known, suited me just fine this evening. She had a list of things we "needed", and I even had a list of my own, so after arriving at the mall, we parted ways. Which is a good thing.

In light of all the household items she had been purchasing over the last few weeks, to be fair, she gave me some money today out of the household budget to spend however I wanted. Normally I would balk at the suggestion, or end up spending the money on bills. Tonight, however, I spent it on myself. I went into the men's clothing store and saw that a bathrobe I had been coveting for a while was at half price, so I snatched it, even though it was two sizes too big. The bigger the better I say, in the robe department. It is light cotton plaid, in a combination of blues, greys, and white, and I wasted no time putting it on upon arriving home. There is nothing like having a nice bathrobe to wrap into after a long day, and The Goddess has earned extra points for this one.

I also got a new CD by David Arkenstone called The Celtic Book Of Days. I had not heard of this artist before, and felt as though I really needed to listen to this CD when I saw it in the store. So I succumbed to the inner voice. Even in hearing the first few tracks right now, I have no regrets.

And The Goddess got what she wanted: to breathe in that commercial air, and purchase things for the house. She was in a much better mood when we returned home, and seems to be settling into bed comfortably.

Make that no regrets, squared.

I cannot help but worry about her sometimes. There is something about her wiring that makes it very arduous for her to turn her brain off at the best of times. Sometimes I have to ask her just to practice being still for a few moments. Nevertheless, the issue becomes exacerbated when she is sleep deprived, yet it is this hyperactivity that keeps her awake at night more often than not. It is a double edged sword, and I am thankful that the medication seems to be working, as long as she lets it at any rate. I have found her to be trying to force herself to stay awake a couple evenings this week when, as indicated by just her eyes, she was clearly in need of being in bed. I am hoping that this week it is her excitement over Brianna's arrival tomorrow.

The house has been a flurry of activity all week in anticipation of her former roommate's visit. We have to leave in the wee hours of the morning to drive two and a half hours out of town to the train station.

I think I'll try to rest up now.....

....Blessed Be...