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	There once was an old man of Esser,
	Whose knowledge grew lesser and lesser,
		It at last grew so small,
		He knew nothing at all,
	And now he's a college professor.

	There was a young lady one fall,
	Who wore a newspaper dress to a ball.
		The dress caught fire,
		And burned her entire,
	Front page, sporting section and all.

	A mouse in her room woke Miss Doud,
	Who was frightened and screamed very loud,
		Then a happy thought hit her,
		To scare off the critter,
	She sat up in bed and just meowed.

	There once was a kid named Darren,
	Who's room was surprisingly barren,
		He had no toys,
		Like all normal boys,
	But he did believe in sharing,

	There was a young lady from Niger,
	Who smiled as she rode on a tiger,
		After the ride,
		She was inside,
	And the smile was on the face of the tiger.

	There was an announcer named Herschel,
	Whose habits became controversial,
		Because when out wooing,
		Whatever he was doing,
	At ten he'd insert his commercial.

	A wonderful bird is the Pelican,
	His beak can hold more than his belly can,
		He can hold in his beak,
		Enough food for a week!
	But I'll be darned if I know how the hell-I-can?

	A dinosaur stomped into a mall,
	Where people are tiny and small,
		"Now why did you think,
		I was really extinct",
	The dinosaur roared with a drawl.

	There once was a fellow named Clyde,
	Who went to a funeral and cried,
		When asked who was dead,
		He stammered and said,
	I don't know, I just came for the ride.

	There once was a lady from Spain,
	Who was sick as she rode on a train,
		Not once, but again---,
		and again and again---,
	and again and again and again.