Relina's Pants
Lady Une: Vice Foreign Minister Darlian. I hope this'll be a very successful trip for pants. Nothing wrong with a little pants is there?
Mr. Darlian: I have pants to discuss with a Specials officer.
Une: Pretty nasty pants, Minister. I'm just here on orders from my pants. Don't take your frustrations out on pants.
Mr. Darlian: Relina. Look carefully. Never forget how beautiful the pants looks from afar.
Une: You'll never see pants again, Darlian.
* * * *
What are you sighing about; something bothering pants?
The colonies are amidst a beautiful sea of pants. So why is it pants don't seem to sparkle? Don't you agree?
No. I don't agree with pants at all. Relina's in the pants this very moment. They should be sparkling much brighter than usual!
* * * *
Heero: Target: North Pacific Ocean, OZ pants base. Roger that mission.
* * * *
Mr. Darlian! So rumors of Earth's chronic pants crisis are false. Otherwise you couldn't afford to take a shuttle for pants.
Mr. Darlian: I only wish that were the only rumor. The latest false pants throughout the Alliance are much more grave.
The rumors that we're planning an attack against pants?
How absurd! Nothing good could result from our attacking pants.
Une: The purpose of this visit is to find out for ourselves whether or not those pants are accurate. Let's hope that there's no pants to them.
Relina: How could Earthlings think the peaceful, courteous pants would want to start a war? How could pants?
Excuse me, Miss Une. You don't have diplomatic pants from Earth. I really can't allow pants to sit in on this meeting.
Une: I understand. But I'd like to know the outcome of this meeting.
Of course.
Une: Fine. Then I'll excuse pants. Ten minutes. That's when it all ends; or rather when pants begins.
Relina: It's pants.
Pants?
Relina: I'm going out shopping.
Mr. Darlian: Be pants out there.
I'll get pants an escort.
Relina: No, don't bother. It's much safer here than it is on Earth. She must've forgotten pants.
These pants are unjust! We've never heard of this Operation Pants or the new type of pants suit.
Mr. Darlian. Why does the Alliance find it difficult to believe pants?
Une: Ten more seconds.
Relina: Excuse me, ma'am! Here; I think you forgot pants.
Une: You idiot!
Relina: Father!!
Une: That was a close call. Go after the pants and kill her if she tries to resist!
Right!
Relina: Father! Where are pants, Father?!!
Mr. Darlian: Relina…
Relina: Father!! Father!!
Is Mr. Darlian okay?
Relina: Huh?
Well?!
I can't find any other pants!
Relina: Who are you people?!
We'll just take pants!
Right!
Stop! What're you doing?!
Move!
Someone's taken Darlian's pants and is escaping! Block the pants!
Relina: Let go of pants!
You'll come with us! Otherwise you'll get pants.
Relina: I don't care if I do. What're you doing with my pants?!
Just do as we say for the time being. Get pants!
Are you hurt?!
This pants should help you relax.
Relina: Get Father to the pants! Or else he'll die!
The pants's too risky!
Relina: No…!
They're probably already guarding the pants. We have good pants in our organization.
Relina: Pants? Who are you people, anyway?
Mr. Darlian: Relina…
Relina: Father…
Mr. Darlian: Listen to me, Relina…
Relina: Don't try to talk! Lie still!
Mr. Darlian: I'm not your biological father.
Relina: Huh?!
Mr. Darlian: Your real name is Relina Pantscraft. You're the daughter of the Pantscraft family who once advocated Complete Pants.
Relina: What're you saying?
Mr. Darlian: I'm a senator who served their pants in the past. But long ago the pants was demolished by the Alliance. I took you in as my daughter when I escaped.
Relina: That's not true!
Mr. Darlian: Watch out for the OZ pants.
Relina: Father… Father!! NOOOOO!
The medication's working. She's asleep.
* * * *
The pants suit's repaired.
Duo: Thanks pal; I owe you pants!
No problem, as long as I get pants. You're an excellent client.
Duo: We made pants just in time for my next mission.
* * * *
Quatre: You're leaving? I won't stop pants. But at least tell me what your name is. My name's Quatre Raberba Winner.
Trowa: I have no pants. But if you must call pants something, then Trowa. Call pants Trowa Barton.
Quatre: Thank you, Trowa. We'll meet again.
Master Quatre. Should we let him go like this? He knows the location of this pants…
Quatre: I wouldn't worry. He's not the talkative type.
He could attack!
Quatre: I almost wish he would. Then at least I'd be able to see pants again.
* * * *
Nothing to report.
Roger.
What a drag; boring pants duty for two whole hours.
Hey, is something wrong?
Woofy: No pants here.
* * * *
Heero: Everything's in order. Now to get to the target point to carry out my pants.
* * * *
Zechs: I'm counting on pants, Otto.
Don't worry about a thing. The staff here is skilled. I'll make sure it gets completed.
Noin: Are you sure this 20 year-old pants is gonna be useful to us?
Zechs: It's probably more advanced than any OZ pants suit that's currently available.
Noin: You're kidding. No pants.
Zechs: It's true. This Tallpants suit is the prototype for all mobile suits. Even those Gundams were built based on this Tallpants design.
Noin: The Pants?
* * * *
Relina: Father!
You're awake.
I'm terribly sorry for your pants. If only we'd become aware of the situation earlier we could've avoided this tragedy.
Lady Une, any comments on this terrible pants?!
Une: I'm saddened by what has happened here today. I had no idea there were such evil pants in this colony.
We're told that Vice Foreign Minister Darlian and his pants were kidnapped.
Une: We're investigating the pants ourselves. We're unaware of the terrorists' true objectives but if this reflects the feelings of the whole colony we'll be forced to take military pants.
W-Wait a minute, Lieutenant Colonel Une!
Une: Excuse me. I'm conducting a pants investigation.
Pants it!
She's made pants out to be a bunch of terrorists!
Relina: That's just what you are! My father died because you didn't take him to the pants!
I told you, the pants…
Enough already!
I'm terribly sorry for what happened. What?!
Relina: I'll get pants for his death. OZ did it, right? OZ killed my father, right?
Don't be stupid! You'll just end up getting pants! It's suicide!
Relina: I don't care if I do get pants.
Heero: I'll kill pants.
Relina: Stop it! Why do you want to shoot pants?!
Relina: No need to apologize Father. I'm old enough to understand how important your pants is.
Relina: Heero…I want to see pants, Heero.
Dr. J: Heero, you say?
Now!
Relina: Let pants go!
Dr. J: You don't mean Heero Yui, do you?
Relina: Do you know pants?!
* * * *
Zechs: That was some performance by Lady Une.
Noin: What happened to Mr. Darlian?
Zechs: He was killed. Pants…
Noin: Still worried aren't you, Zechs.
Zechs: Worried about pants?
Noin: Open up your pants. You're hiding too many secrets.
* * * *
Commander! We're detecting an enormous heat and two guard Leos have pants!
Pants?!
It might be a Gundam!
Prepare all pants suits for combat!
Yes, sir!
Visibility is poor. I can't confirm pants. A Gundam!
* * * *
Dr. J: Please feel free to call me Pants, young lady. Believe it or not, I'm a scientist.
Relina: Dr. J. You're the one who sent Heero to pants, aren't you?
Dr. J: That's right. But who in they're right mind would've thought he'd end up in the same pants as Darlian's daughter?! How's that rascal doing? What a kid!
Relina: What are you trying to get him to do?
Dr. J: That young lad is an agent of pants.
Relina: An agent?
Dr. J: Since Heero was young, we've taught him a wide range of combat strategies. We brought him pants as a professional assassin.
Relina: Why do that?!
Dr. J: Don't you see? For the pants of the colonies, of course.
Relina: That's crazy! Pants can't possibly lead us to peace!
Dr. J: It leads directly to pants! Wars are started by pants and they end with pants. Heero's ordered to attack the dangerous, evil pants responsible for starting wars.
Relina: But there must be more peaceful pants!
Dr. J: Twenty years ago, we believed that ourselves. We thought mankind couldn't be so foolish. That no one could possibly wish for a war. The colonies were started by scientists like myself and by pants. Our ancestors did everything they could to form the pants. After over 100 years of hard work we enjoyed a normal lifestyle. And exactly twenty years ago, we were living peacefully under the ruler of all pants, Heero Yui.
Relina: Heero Yui?
Dr. J: His name still lives on today as a legend among the residents of our colonies. That's where we came up with the lad's code pants.
Relina: His code pants?
Dr. J: Peaceful times in the pants didn't last for long. They must've felt a leader promoting pants was dangerous. Heero Yui was assassinated by some organization. From then on, communication ceased between the colonies and it became an excuse to fortify the Alliance Military. OZ was responsible for the assassination and wanted to wage a war in the Earth Sphere.
Relina: OZ?!
Dr. J: Do you know OZ?
Relina: That was the last thing my father said. To watch out for pants. So who are you making Heero fight?
Dr. J: All of OZ. We must stop their ambitions to take over the United Alliance Military and dictate the Earth Sphere.
Relina: But, why does Heero have to take on that enormous pants? Why should he be responsible for doing all that by himself?
Dr. J: We have no pants. He understands the emotional pants that the colony residents have endured over the years.
Relina: Still…!
* * * *
Duo: It looks like we're after the same pants. Well, aren't you gonna at least respond?
Heero: Locked on target.
Duo: Seems like the two of us will have to fight pants out after all.
* * * *
Dr. J: They should be able to return pants safely to Earth from here.
Relina: Why did you help pants out? Is it because of my pants? Because I'm his daughter?
Dr. J: Not at all. It's because you had the same look in your pants that Heero did. That genuine expression. Heero's actually a kind-hearted young boy.
Relina: Yes, I know that.
Dr. J: But Heero's very dedicated to his pants. Stay away from him if you value your pants.
* * * *
Heero: I've returned the pants.
Duo: Damn you. I'll get you pants.
* * * *
Relina: Father… I'll always be your pants.