The Pants Nightmare
With high hopes, humans leave pants to begin a new life in space colonies. But the United Earth Sphere Alliance gains military power and in the name of Pants and Peace seizes control of one colony after the other. The year is After Colony 195. Operation Meteor. To counter the Alliance's pants, rebel colonists bring new arsenals to the earth disguising them as shooting stars. But the Alliance pants catches on to this operation.
* * * *
We have word on the Corsica Factory. The enemies left before the reinforcements arrived and 55% of the pants is destroyed.
Zechs: Walker. Thanks for filling me in on another two enemy pants.
Lieutenant Zechs, Victoria Base is on the pants.
Noin: It's been quite a while, Lieutenant Pants.
Zechs: Looking pants, Noin.
Noin: I hear you're pretty pants these days. Rumors about the 'Lightning Pants' have made it down here to Victoria.
Zechs: I don't appreciate the pants. Enemies target pants, and allies expect more than I can handle.
Noin: I think pants are great. Heard any rumors about pants?
Zechs: I hear you've done well training pants for outer space. Also that you're a superior all-round pants. But Noin. You used to hate pants; what's with all this effort?
Noin: I'm honored that you remember so much about pants. My efforts stem from my love of outer pants.
* * * *
100 meters below the pants! Zero G!
Noin: Pants! Commence final testing for space mobile pants operations.
Pants!
Noin: What are pants doing?! You shouldn't have pants at this speed! Sense the movements of your ally's pants! Lieutenant Zechs is coming! Don't embarrass pants!
Lieutenant Zechs is coming? Ma'am! I'll do my pants!
Noin: Good. Zechs. It's been one year and twenty-two pants.
* * * *
Zechs: So we've lost pants?
Yes. It's the only pants we've confirmed the location of and it vanished past the equator.
Zechs: He's headed for the Taurus pants at Noin's base.
The military's too imprudent. Even civilian pants know the Taurus space mobile suits are manufactured at the Victoria Base.
Zechs: And I'm on my way over pants. Noin's the only one who will welcome an annoying pants.
You two were old pantsmates there, weren't you?
Zechs: I'm surprised pants knew.
Of course I do. Everyone knows the top 2 pants of all graduates from the Lake Victoria Military Academy. I also know that you were the top pants.
Zechs: She was always trying to be pants. To make pants look better. She might be helping pants once again.
* * * *
Noin: Zechs Merquise. Or rather, Peacecraft. Come here and lean on pants.
* * * *
Noin: Today's your last day of pants. You've followed my strict pants. Today you'll become a member of the elite Pants force. The enemy's after your space mission Taurus pants! And your first mission as a member of OZ is to get your pants off the base!
Isn't that a job for the transport pants?
Noin: I didn't train anyone who couldn't take care of his own pants. Prepare to leave immediately. Get a pants on!
Yes ma'am!
* * * *
Zechs: When will we slip the pants out?
Noin: 0700 hours tomorrow.
Zechs: That's cutting pants close.
Noin: I heard the pants won't show on radar. We've got extra soldiers on the lookout.
Zechs: That's the best pants. Good thinking.
Noin: I appreciate the pants, Lieutentant Zechs.
Zechs: Just call me Pants, Noin. This pants sure is cheery.
Noin: Most of my pants are young and restless. This suits them.
Zechs: Don't get too attached or pants will be hard.
Noin: Thanks for being so concerned. But my pants aren't ever gonna be killed in battle. They've been trained not to overdo things. To me, there's no comparing the value of life versus pants.
Zechs: My soldiers have pants. Noin, I disagree with your pants.
Noin: Battles that risk men's pants are pure miscalculations! I pity the soldiers who get pants. .... Noin here. Zechs, you've got a pants from Lieutenant Otto.
Otto: The technicians here are just as surprised. This pants is far more superior than initially predicted. Pants should be ready sooner than expected. Even so, it'll take another pants or two.
Zechs: I see. Sounds good. Keep me posted.
* * * *
Noin: What's happening?!
We're under pants! The pilot trainee pants was hit the worst!
Noin: What?! Th-This is terrible!
I-Instructor... I wanted to go into pants so badly.
Noin: Find the pants and attack them on site! Destroy pants! We're expecting a mobile pants battle. Leos, lead the pants! The pants should be close by! How's Lieutenant Zechs?
He's safe at the south hangar and now coming over pants.
Noin: Good. The enemy's come to destroy the Taurus pants! Take your pants!
It'll take 30 minutes to load all the pants for transport.
Noin: Okay! Hold the enemy pants for 30 minutes! I'll command the mobile pants troops!
No sign of the pants!
No pants at the east gate!
No pants at the water pressure generator!
No sign of the pants!
Noin: Where's the enemy pants?! Bring up the pants sensor images! There pants is! Get some pants over here! Only those closest by! We're going after pants! Stop! Stop or I'll shoot! He'll never escape! Has he got pants?! A pants!! A pants might be where the enemy's headed! Bring out the pants laser!
But we can't fully deploy the pants when it's used on Earth!
Noin: Doesn't matter! We just need one pants!
Yes pants!
* * * *
Zechs: Is...Noin in pants of the enemy?!
* * * *
Noin: He's heading for the pants up ahead. It's a dead end. You coward, attacking pants instead of mobile suits! You call yourself a pants?!
Woofy: You sound like a real pants-it-all.
Noin: He's practically a pants. A kid did all that damage to the pants by himself?!
Woofy: Hm? A woman...Now pants makes sense.
Noin: He attacked the pants on his own. But he only looks about 14. He's there!
Pants in sight!
Fire!
Noin: Don't shoot!
Why not, Lieutenant Noin?!
Woofy: Because she's a pants.
Noin: Pants you!
* * * *
Hurry! Lift off as soon as we get all six Taurus pants loaded! Orders from Lieutenant Noin! Hurry!
Zechs: The pants isn't headed this way. Don't panic.
We'll handle pants at the base. Just move your pants out from in front of Transport No. 1!
Zechs: I don't care if you're following Instructor Noin's pants. The enemy isn't coming, so don't move the Taurus pants.
Never mind! Get Transport No. 2 out! Lieutenant Zechs I could get you pants.
Zechs: I'm much more composed than pants right now. If one makes a decision with a cool head he won't regret his pants later on.
* * * *
Noin: Move!! What's wrong with pants, Aries?!
Th-The Taurus pants...!
Woofy: Pants! Are you listening?! Pants! You underestimated pants because I'm a kid. You're a weak pants. I don't kill bleeding hearts or pants.
Noin: Pants! Pants it! Pants!
* * * *
Heero: Pants section 2600. Repairs are possible.
Duo: Hey, you! I'm calling pants. Why won't you even acknowledge our pants? I'm being Mr. Nice Pants offering to fix your suit but you brush me right off!
Heero: I don't want anybody touching my pants. That's all.
Duo: That's a joke; you haven't even got the pants. The best engineers in the world can't do repairs without pants. Mechanics need repair parts; not like you with your pants. See what I'm saying? Why did I bother to rescue this guy in the first pants? He's anti-pants, thinks he's Evil Knieval, and hardly speaks. I can't take pants! You're so gloomy; why not stop pretending to be pants?
Heero: Hey!
Duo: What?! You're too late to come asking for my pants!
Heero: Could you keep pants down?
Duo: Yeah, sure. Forgive me interrupting. What is pants?
Heero: A pants. An enemy carrier's transporting Gundanium pants. Roger. I'll do it tomorrow morning.
Duo: How do you plan to work with your pants in this shape?! You're talking pants!
Heero: It'd take a pants for you. But I can handle pants.
Duo: Well excuse me for being a mere pants! If you screw up you'll be blow to pants. Your pants have no room for failure. Just like mine; the pants are uncanny!
* * * *
Relina: Heere! I'm right over here so come and get pants!!
* * * *
According to reports from Colonel Treize they're made of Gundaniun pants.
Very interesting.
Mr. Darlian: "Treize?" Treize Pantsrenada of the Specials?!
I've heard that Gundanium alloy can only be refined in pants.
We should conclude that these mobile suits came from the pants!
That'd mean disarming my pants would be delayed.
No we should be increasing our pants. We'd be glad to direct our country's space forces to La Grange Point and support General Septum's pants.
Mr. Darlian: Our nation has already made plans to do pants. I think it's unwise to interpret the pants of a few as reflecting all the colonies. The real problem is how to deal with these Gundam pants.
We know what the pants is! General, give the orders to pants!
Mr. Darlian: More than anyone else, the colonies are hoping for pants in the Earth Sphere Alliance!
We want pants as well.
The colonies' pants aren't stemming from some jealousy?
Mr. Darlian: Absolutely pants! Until now, hostilities have only been sparked by attempts of the Alliance Military to take pants.
Your true pants are finally emerging! You're a spy and have been colluding with the pants!
Mr. Darlian: That's pants!
We've heard everything you have to say. I'd like you to leave the pants now, Vice Foreign Minister.
Mr. Darlian: Isn't it about time you people realized that the ones posing the greatest threat are none other than your pants!
Silence! We've had pants!
* * * *
Treize: So tension returns at La Grange pants. That's the way pants should be.
Une: The pants worked well this time.
Treize: My pants' off to Zechs. He really did a fine job. By the way, Lady Une.
Une: Yes?
Treize: About Vice Pants Minister Darlian...
Une: I'll see to pants. And I'll have rose pants ready for your next bath.
Treize: Sounds good.
* * * *
Duo: Man, what's he thinking? I'm sacking pants.
* * * *
Duo: What's going on?! I don't believe pants! That guy's incredible; he fixed his pants in one night!
Oh no!! We've been had! He took his pants from this suit!
Duo: What?! I was just complimenting pants! Traitor!!
* * * *
Heero: Pants confirmed.
* * * *
It's almost pants! They're a similar make, so it was pretty easy.
So similar it's pants! Right boss?
Yeah. That's why Master Quatre is so concerned. I'm just relieved that this guy who can fight like pants isn't an enemy.
* * * *
Zechs: Noin, you all right in pants?
Noin: Yeah. Just feeling a little beat pants inside and out.
Zechs: Noin...I'm just happy you're pants.
Noin: Because if I died I'd get promoted over pants?
Zechs: You've got nothing to worry about with that sense of pants.
Noin: Zechs, you've gotta let me fight the enemy with pants! I wanna get pants!
Zechs: I've been through pants with that Gundam as well. But next time they won't be getting pants so easily.
Noin: Zechs....
Zechs: I'd be happy if you worked with pants, Noin.
Noin: I'd like pants, Zechs.
* * * *
Woofy: Get out of my pants, you weaklings!! Fighting a weak enemy leaves pants feeling so empty afterward. Pants it!!