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As Taylor walked through the front door of East High a week and a half later, a shadow of Gabriella by her side, she felt the eyes on the pair of them, wishing she could make this first day back for Gabriella easier. Gabriella had arrived back yesterday afternoon with Mary and only Taylor had seen the brunette, a bit shocked when she first laid eyes on Gabriella. Taylor would have been more so but Sandra had kept her promise and had been updating Taylor with Gabriella's progress while Gabriella remained in L.A. and Taylor intended to keep hers to the other girl in keeping Gabriella under watch and care and updating Sandra. While walking within the first few feet down the hall, Taylor felt numerous pairs of eyes turn their way, staring at them but more specifically at Gabriella. Taylor hadn't felt this many stares since the time Gabriella and she walked into the cafeteria after the callback listing was posted listing Troy and Gabriella along with Ryan and Sharpay last spring.
Luckily, as Taylor glanced over at Gabriella to see how she was taking the attention, it appeared that her best friend hadn't even really registered it, keeping her eyes trained on the floor, seeming like she was more afraid of tripping over her own feet. At the same time though, Taylor felt her heart go out even more to Gabriella as she saw a single tear travel down her pale cheek, watching as a shaky hand reached up and brushed it away followed by a quiet sniffle. "Gab?"
Gabriella turned her eyes to meet Taylor's, knowing her best friend would see the tears waiting to be shed and blinked rapidly to clear them, satisfied when her vision was no longer blurry. "I'll be fine, I think. Mom was right, I need to get back into this or I'll never get back into it at all."
Taylor nodded her agreement. "I agree with your mom but that doesn't mean you have to force yourself to be the 'happy, nothing is wrong' Gabriella either. Your friends will care for you no matter what while those who dare to try to take you down a few notches with their taunting aren't worth your time anyway."
Gabriella just nodded her understanding, following Taylor up the stairs to their lockers. She automatically entered her combination before the door opened, somehow relieved to know there was no picture of her and Tristan to be seen as their only picture together there had been taken home the day of her fight with Troy. 'Troy,' she thought as she allowed herself to gaze at a picture of them on her locker door.
As the tears gathered again, Gabriella put her focus on getting her books and binders together, knowing Taylor would be waiting for her in homeroom. It had taken a lot to convince Taylor to let Gabriella go to her locker alone so Taylor could go to hers, meet Chad, and make it to homeroom on time. For that reason Gabriella didn't want to be late and worry her now.
She closed her locker and started walking to homeroom, catching some students staring at her as they whispered among themselves. This only served to confirm Gabriella's suspicion about being talked about but she brushed it off, gossip being the least of her current problems. Gabriella tenderly placed both hands on the opposite upper arm, crossing her arms in the process, feeling the soft material of her sweatshirt with her fingertips, careful not to press too hard as she continued her walk to class.
Sharpay was walking to the same classroom when she spied Gabriella gloomily walking in the same direction of their mutual homeroom, shaking her head in superficial pity at the black sweatshirt and sweatpants Gabriella had on. 'Bet she got those at Wal-mart too.'
Sick pleasure filled Sharpay's veins as she watched Gabriella stop walking from the opposite direction only to see the brunette's face fall even more at the mere sight of Troy talking to Zeke and a few cheerleaders who were standing close to him, one even with her arm wrapped around his left. Sharpay's heart skipped a bit at Gabriella's reaction only because it meant that she and Troy were for sure splitsville, if not before, definitely now. 'Whatever you did Tristan, fabulous job!'
Sharpay silently cheered, knowing her window to pursue Troy was even more open as Gabriella managed to blend in with the crowd and entered homeroom from the back of the classroom via the second door. Sharpay had worked especially hard the past several days to gain Troy's trust again as a caring friend and felt the change to that relationship was finally within her grasp.
As she sauntered up to the small group in front of the first door to the classroom, Sharpay saw Zeke notice her first with a big grin on his face so she promptly waved back before sliding her own arm around Troy's right arm, giving Troy her best smile. "Morning Troy, Zeke," she greeted, smiling more as Troy gave her a small smile. "Bell is about to ring. We better go inside."
Troy allowed Sharpay to lead him into the classroom, shaking off the hold of the cheerleader only to be immediately distracted by the sticky feeling of Sharpay's lip glossed lips on his cheek, catching the corner of his lips with hers before she left him at his desk. He put a hand to his cheek to wipe off the foreign substance while he stared at Sharpay in wonder.
"You know, you are such a jerk Bolton," said Kelsi in the most disgusted voice Troy had ever heard leave her lips. He watched Kelsi walk away from him as Martha gave him the dirtiest look she had ever given him too before looking away as if Troy were merely dirt on the bottom of her sneaker.
"And you know it's true when Kelsi says it. She saved me the trouble," stated Taylor before she began to walk away to follow her two friends. She stopped though when Troy put out his hand and laid it on her shoulder. "What?"
"What do you mean 'what'? You've been acting super bitchy and cold with me lately. Just because Gabriella broke up with me doesn't give you the right to dis me like this," replied Troy, still not feeling himself since the last time he heard Gabriella's voice ending things.
Taylor scoffed, letting out a harsh laugh. "She broke up with you? Not likely. You know how I know? Gabriella wouldn't look like the way she looks when she needs you the most only to find you with other girls! I saw you out in the hall, we all saw you, now and in the past few days with Sharpay, with cheerleaders, with any other girl who wants to try you out now that you and Gabriella are clearly over. You're oozing that you are single and ready for game again when my best friend is heartbroken and falling to pieces. To me, that makes you a jerk and you deserve more than a cold shoulder!"
With that, Taylor shook off his hand and walked towards the back of the room while Troy's eyes followed her, subconsciously hearing all the murmurs around the room. Troy's gaze passed the desk that had been empty for so long in the back of the room only to double back when he saw someone there, surrounded by Martha, Kelsi, and now Taylor. From where he was standing, he could see the dullness of her usually vibrant eyes along with the paleness of her skin, making Troy worry that maybe Gabriella was really sick.
'Does it matter? She broke up with you!' he argued in his head but found a part of him was fighting back, forcing Troy to realize that no matter what, Troy still loved Gabriella and nothing would change that, even the heartache he was experiencing of his own. Despite this realization, Troy held himself back from approaching her like he wanted to, from drawing Gabriella into his arms, knowing that Ms. Darbus was due in any time now along with the bell while ignoring the fact that he was actually just unsure if Gabriella would really want that now.
Instead, Troy forced himself to sit down in his seat, feeling like the scabs had been ripped off his barely healing heart to ooze with pain and sadness once again with the fresh reminder of what now resided outside his grasp. He barely acknowledged Chad as he, Jason, and Zeke walked in just before Ms. Darbus, currently confused as to what had happened in the past two weeks and how and if the past could ever be achieved again, a place where he and she were both happy, especially with each other. As Ms. Darbus started with homeroom announcements, Troy decided that he would give Gabriella her space for now, knowing that something had to be really wrong for her to be like that but also considering that she broke up with him, which hurt more each time he thought about it instead of less. Little did he realize that his one resolution would send so many wrong messages to everyone else in East High, especially the brunette who was silently staring at him from her seat in the back, wondering how everything had gotten this bad.
Gabriella allowed the soft breeze to ruffle her hanging dark strands, knowing she should find comfort in being up on the rooftop where she had so many happy memories but they seemed to only want to terrorize her instead of comfort her. It was up here that she and Troy really had their first meaningful conversation, where they continued to come to be alone, to enjoy stolen moments during school together to just share their lunches, to talk.
'God, where have all those happy times gone?' she wondered, shaking her head as she began to despair about the situation she was in again.
Just before she had reached her locker fifteen minutes ago, Gabriella had spied Troy with yet another pair of girls hanging on him, feeling what was left of her heart constrict with pain but continued to go on, knowing after observing him all morning that Troy really was off to find someone new, someone better than her. 'Face it Gabriella, you have baggage and baggage that makes you unappealing and unattractive to any guy, especially a guy like Troy. I mean, who else would want you after you killed another guy so early on in life?'
Gabriella stood between her mother and Sandra on the grass, just another mourning body covered in all black as a group of forty people or so who were mostly family and very close friends stood around Tristan's grave, watching as his body was lowered into the ground, housed in a casket of gleaming wood. All throughout the service and most of the sermon here in the graveyard, Gabriella had listened to the words being spoken but nothing quite stayed in her heart and mind as she struggled with the pain, the grief, the silent cross she was beginning to feel herself bear.
Days before, she had been interviewed by the police to give them her verbal and written account of what happened. They had shared with her that they were confident it was an act of suicide and no foul play was involved afterwards, a routine check-off process they had to go through, letting her know that they were sorry for her loss. Gabriella had just stared at the officers and nodded her head, wondering somewhere in her mind how many times they must have said that to people who have continued to grieve for lost loved ones to much more violent acts or lesser ones. At that point of her stay in L.A., Gabriella began to feel herself grow numb, a way she felt she was trying to preserve herself, but the numbness disappeared with a call from Ian, who wanted her to attend the service and burial of his cousin.
Now as Gabriella watched with glazed eyes as dirt piled on top of the casket, shovel full of dirt by shovel full of dirt, the agony in having to say this final good-bye ripped through her body, the sobs pouring out from her very soul while she let the tears fall. It seemed as if with each shovel full of dirt, Gabriella's own heart grew heavier and heavier, causing so much pain that Gabriella placed her left hand over her right hip, pressing just enough to give her some comfort, drawing some of the pain away from the one organ that was beating so fast now as she continued to watch the coffin disappear under the mounds of dirt.
Lydia watched from across the grave as the young brunette seemed to be genuinely torn apart by Tristan's death. For a fleeting moment, Lydia felt sympathy for the young girl but it quickly disappeared as Lydia's eyes returned to the grave of her young son, her only child, who she felt she should never have had buried. "It's all her fault, she took my baby away," she murmured quietly, so softly that only Ian had heard her.
Ian turned his head sharply to look at his aunt, surprised to hear the words. He felt the short hairs on the back of his neck stand up as he saw the glacial look she was sending an unsuspecting Gabriella, feeling something warn him of what would come later.
More and more people continued to give Lydia and the rest of Tristan's close family their condolences as they began to leave, leaving only a few people, including Gabriella, Sandra, and Mary, still around Tristan's grave as it continued to be filled with dirt.
Once it seemed that Gabriella had calmed down some, seeing the last of the dirt being piled on top of Tristan's casket, Mary wrapped a comforting arm around Gabriella's shoulders, getting ready to lead her daughter and her best friend away from such a sad place. Gabriella's face stayed turned towards the grave, her eyes never leaving the mound of dirt now there until Mary and Sandra had escorted her too far to see it clearly, almost to their car. As soon as the car began its drive to Tristan's family's house for a sort of celebration of his life, the fatigue that Gabriella had tried fighting off all day finally won and Gabriella allowed her tearless eyes to finally close as her head rested against the cold window.
When she awoke, her forehead was pressed up against the same window and Gabriella blinked a few times before looking over and seeing both her mother and Sandra talking quietly with their seatbelts off. Puzzled, Gabriella looked around and saw that they were parked on a familiar looking street.
Seeing Gabriella's confused look, Mary gave her daughter a small smile. "Sandy and I thought it best to let you sleep while you found it sweetie. You haven't been sleeping and you've started looking so sick we knew you had to have rest sometime."
Gabriella opened her mouth to speak but found her throat was really dry so she tried to clear it before she said in a bit of a broken voice, "How long has it been?"
Sandra offered Gabriella the water bottle Gabriella had drank from before the funeral that was in the backseat next to Sandra and replied, "It's been about an hour or so since we've been parked. You've been out probably close to two. You needed it Gabriella and you looked so peaceful that your mom and I couldn't bear to disturb that. It's the calmest and almost the happiest I've seen you in the past week. Did you dream at all?"
After drinking from the water bottle, Gabriella nodded her head, a sad smile on her lips. "It was mostly a dreamless sleep but I remember just now seeing both Tristan and Troy smiling back at me. Maybe that's my heart's way of telling my mind what it wants, happiness for both of them."
"I'm sure wherever Tristan is, he's looking down at you now wanting the same for you," replied Mary, reaching over and taking her daughter's hand in hers, squeezing it a little. "He'd be upset Gabriella, knowing that you are this sad over the loss of him. Remember what the priest said which I think is very true. A person only dies if you let them leave your heart and I know you well enough to know you'll never let that happen."
Gabriella nodded, breathing in deeply before letting it out, allowing her mother's words to root themselves into her being for the first time since Tristan's death. From the backseat she heard Sandra add, "Tristan may be gone but you still have so many more people who love you that are here for you Gabriella. We're all worried about you and know that this must be tough. Just, don't think you're alone in this all right."
Their encouraging words seemed to give Gabriella a bit of relief from the constant heartache that had plagued her, lifting Gabriella's spirits a little as she realized how much she really was loved and cared for by both females. "Thank you. I guess we better go inside," stated Gabriella, undoing her seatbelt and looking at the house that was several down from where the car was parked.
When the mother and two girls walked through the front door, they immediately felt the grief echoing through the large house. They greeted those they knew, Gabriella bravely meeting the eyes of so many people she hadn't allow herself to look at directly in the past out of guilt, making small talk here and there while they continued to move through the rooms on the first floor.
It was when Gabriella had stepped away from the constant companionship of her mother and best friend to look at a table with pictures of Tristan ranging from when he was a baby to his last football game that Gabriella's brown eyes locked with Lydia's green eyes. Words quickly escaped Gabriella having Tristan's mother standing right in front of her, knowing how much the older woman must be hurting, must be mourning.
The two pairs of eyes continued to stare at one another, the silent tension building as each second passed by before Lydia spoke the words she had been keeping checked all this time to the girl she felt may as well have pulled the trigger of the gun Tristan used to kill himself with. "You have some nerve coming into my home, where I raised my son, my darling Tristan, my baby, after you murdered him! How dare you show your face here you little tramp! It was hard enough having to watch like you actually cared about my son at the service and the burial but did you really have to come here and remind me that your worthless life is still on this planet when Tristan's is gone?"
Tears welled up in Gabriella's eyes as she looked back at Lydia in horror, her chin trembling a little as she felt her small amounts of positive energy slip away with those chilling words. "I'm sorry. I just…"
"Just shut up! How could you have played with my sweetheart like that, with no regard to how he would feel after you broke up with him especially the second time? Tristan loved you despite all my telling him not to get involved with the little tramp that you are! I begged him to stop seeing you the second time around, seeing him getting wrapped up all around you again, but Tristan wouldn't listen to me. You are the only topic we ever argued about, that he went against my wishes in regards to! And your form of gratitude? You damned Tristan to his depression that consumed him! I found several of his medicine bottles full in the medicine cabinet the other day. Do you know what that means Gabriella? He stopped taking them around when he met you again. So I'm sorry but your apology means nothing to me, not after killing my son, not after tearing this family apart and forcing me to live through a day I never wanted to see, the day I had to bury my only son," seethed Lydia, her eyes narrowing on Gabriella's face, ignoring the tears that freely fell down her pale cheeks. "It should be my son here in this room with me, not you, not after everything you did to Tristan. You murdered my baby!"
"Aunt Lydia stop!" exclaimed Ian, running over to the pair just ahead of Mary and Sandra. "You don't know what you're saying, you're hurting deeply and speaking from grief."
"Stay out of this Ian, I want Gabriella to know the truth, what she really did to Tristan. She deserves to know," argued Lydia, not taking her eyes off the brunette, not seeing how Ian had stopped to stand by Gabriella, grabbing her hand and holding it in his to give her some type of comfort. "Gabriella, you've taken my life away from me and all that knew Tristan. I want you to understand that if it wasn't for you, Tristan would still be alive today."
Before Lydia could say more, Mary stepped in between Tristan's mother and Mary's daughter, breaking the direct eye contact the two had shared. "I cannot imagine the amount of pain and grief you are experiencing, losing your son this way, but I beg you not to torment my daughter right now the way you believe she did him. Gabriella loved Tristan with the purest form there is, young love, and did not wish him any harm, despite their true hardships."
"You can't even begin to think you know what I feel so don't assume you do," returned Lydia in a low tone. "And if she loved Tristan as you say she did, how could Gabriella have allowed Tristan to remain off his medication, to allow him to slip away like he did?"
"Because he didn't need them Aunt Lydia!" Ian sternly retorted, now wrapping an arm around a trembling Gabriella while Sandra ran a comforting hand up and down her back. "He was happy with Gabriella, he truly was. In fact from what Tristan told me about this summer and fall, even with the breakup, Tristan had no regrets about his time spent with Gabriella or the choices he made. Tristan respected and adored Gabriella Aunt Lydia. Why can't you see that this sweet girl didn't do it? It was my cousin, your son, who took that gun and pulled the trigger, not Gabriella, not me, and not you."
Without realizing what she was doing, Lydia's hand flew through the air and slapped Ian's cheek, leaving a stinging, red mark on his face, the sound from the contact traveling through the room that had gone quiet to observe the confrontation. "Don't you dare tell me what to do and how Tristan supposedly felt. I did so much for that boy, as did his father, and he left all of us! We did nothing wrong and yet he felt his life without this girl wasn't worth living. That's the real heartache here! Gabriella didn't have to pull the trigger because she's the one that turned the light switch off on his happiness weeks ago. Tristan merely made that blackness permanent."
Soon other family members came and swept a hysterical Lydia away from Sandra, Ian, and Mary as they quickly turned their attention to Gabriella, who had her face pressed firmly into Ian's chest, letting quiet sobs escape as Gabriella somehow found even more tears to cry, feeling now like they would never stop.
"His mother was so right too, despite what Ian and Sandra tried to tell me later that night after I calmed down. I am responsible in so many ways for his death," murmured Gabriella, blinking her dry, unseeing eyes.
Moments later, Gabriella's heart started pounding faster as she heard the door to the stairwell open followed quickly by steps up the stairs. Her brown eyes regained their focus as she stared at the opening of the stairwell, waiting to see who it was. As Taylor's black hair and then face became visible as she climbed the last few steps of the stairway, Gabriella's heart slowed, silently kicking herself for thinking that Troy would try to come and find her. 'After all, he has all those other girls now. You aren't even a blip on his radar these days.'
"Hey Gab. The gang wanted to know where you were. They're worried about you especially as they don't know where you disappeared to or what happened. Are you sure you don't want to tell them?" asked Taylor, gingerly taking a seat next to her best friend.
Gabriella shook her head. "I feel horrible enough as it is. Having everyone looking at me with sympathy in their eyes would be too much right now. Some random kids are already because they know Troy moved on from me but I just, I can't take anyone else knowing."
"Then they won't," echoed Taylor, giving Gabriella an encouraging smile. "Hoping that Troy would come find you huh?"
Surprise filled Gabriella's eyes as she looked back at Taylor, who only shook her head at seeing that emotion caused by her words. "It was stupid of me."
"Not as stupid as he's being. Gabriella, maybe you should try talking to him, hear it from him as to why he's moved on, been seen with Sharpay and these other girls. Maybe that will help you," offered Taylor, hating to see Gabriella in more than one type of pain. Seeing her best friend in pain was already too much to bear but knowing Gabriella was suffering from the loss of her first love and what Taylor suspected was Gabriella's true love shortly after pained Taylor even more.
"There's nothing for him to say. I know why Troy ran for the hills when he found out about me being in L.A. because of Tristan. He's scared I'll kill him too," murmured Gabriella, pure honesty heard in her voice. "Troy has moved on, his lack of approaching me and not speaking to me at all shows that. Maybe I really would kill him in the end. I'm better off just by myself."
Taylor reached out and placed a soft hand on Gabriella's upper arm in an attempt to comfort Gabriella and was so worried about Gabriella's words that she missed Gabriella's jump of pain. "Well you aren't by yourself. You have me, you have Sandy, you have your mother. We'll never leave you alone, promise."
Distantly, the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch period a few moments later, ending the quiet moment the two girls had shared. "We better get going," said Gabriella, standing up first and waiting for Taylor to do so as well.
Taylor tried her best not to give Gabriella a sympathetic look as she joined Gabriella at the stairwell, both walking down together and to their next class together.
Neither saw the blue eyes trained on them, specifically on the shadow of a once vibrant girl who was hiding herself away in sweats and solitude, watching them from down the hall where he had been for most of the lunch period. Troy had started to head to the rooftop for his own solo time but had seen Gabriella head up there on her own just as he rounded the corner to go to the same door. Instead, Troy had spent most of the lunch period debating on whether to go up and confront Gabriella about why she ended things, to ascend the stairs and demand Gabriella tell Troy what was wrong with her, or to just keep his distance, letting her come to him if she really wanted to. He had decided on the latter, knowing full well that he wouldn't be able to talk to her without his emotions chocking him yet again. Something inside Troy though was fighting to be heard, a part of him that was trying to warn him that something more was going on, something other than Gabriella just breaking up with him but Troy's misery wouldn't listen, leaving Troy in a state of confusion as to where his heart really lay and what he could do to change things.