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What if the book had
been written by a different author
Like Shakespeare, or Milton, or Dickens or Chaucer
And then giving my ponderer a little more juice
I thought: what if the Book of Mormon had been written by Seuss?
Nephi: Of goodly parents I was born
I've never drunk, I've never sworn
This is Lehi, he's my dad
Laman, Lemuel, they are bad
And who is this? Why this is Sam.
Sam: Yes, this is Sam;
Sam I am
Laman: That Sam I am, that Sam I am
I do not like that Sam I am
Sam:
In a tent, my father dwelt
Laman: And it's
so hot, I think I'll melt
Lemuel: Our father's
brain is out of whack
Laman: Yeah, it's
too hot, I'm going back
Lehi:
Then go and get the plates my dear
Laman: On second
thought, I'm staying here
Nephi: You
said you'd leave and go away
Now all you want to do is stay?
Lemuel: That Nephi
always gets his way
Laman: Here
we are in this damp cave
Sam:
We would not be here if you'd behave
Nephi:
I will go and I will do
There's the angel, that's my cue
Laban's had too much to drink
Now he'll lose his head, I think
Nephi: Look
what I found, a brother from the quorum
Sam:
We will take him home, we will call him Zoram
Laman: Our gold and
silver we have spent
I do not like it in this tent
Lemuel: I cannot read the
Liahona
I must have drunk too much Corona
Laman: We hate it here,
we have no lives
Lehi:
Then go back to the city and get some wives
Lehi: A
tree, a tree, I see a tree!!
The fruit is white, the fruit is free!
A floating building, could it be?
Why do they laugh and stare at me?
Laman, Lemuel, come and see!
Laman: We will
not eat your precious fruit
Lemuel: We will not
wear a tie and suit
Laman: We will
not help you build your boat
Lemuel: We do not think that
it will float
Laman: No not this boat, it
will not float
Not even in a shallow moat
I do not care what Nephi wrote
Lemuel: We will not eat your
fruit I say
Laman: We will not eat
it on a tray
Lemuel: And we won't eat it
in a tent
Not even if your clothes you rent
Laman: We'd rather have a can
of spam
L&L:
We will not eat it, Sam I am
Sam: You do not
like it, so you say
Try it, try it, and you may
Try it and you may I say
Laman: Sam, if you will let
us be,
We will try it, you will see
L&L:
Say, we like this fruit of life
Sorry that we caused such strife
You've saved us from an awful jam
Thank you, thank you, Sam I am |