ATTENTION

Later this evening the new url will be posted along with all further updates. I just need to finsih changing over my personal facts page, a second journal, and the guestbook and then I'm ready to go! I'm so excited.

I just wanted to give a special thank you to everyone who has been encouraging me and putting up with my fried brain while I do a new layout and get used to having a webhost for the first time. A special thanks goes to Bevie for helping me with all my technical questions. I just wanted to let everyone know that the page is finally in transit to it's new destination and home.

Everything is still functional though, so feel free to post comments and leave me some loving in my guestbook. I can always use more love!

Back to my regular posts.

Procrastionation Queen

So incase you were wondering why there has been no grand and glorious announcement of my new domain is...I keep putting it off. I was sick last night. Heh.

I am better (so far) today though. So maybe tonight I'll work it all out. Who knows. Surely not me. Let's just hope that the sore throat and the inability to breathe properly will go away and stay away. I hate colds. I'm allergic or something like that. Yeah that's it, I must be allergic to colds because they make me feel like shit. Total and utter shit. It's not a total bust though.

Today was payday. That's always a good thing. So on my way home for lunch I bought a coffee, so this means I won't be heading out to the clinic today for my checkup and blood test. Because coffee drastically alters several things, such as your heart rate. Since the doctors all give me the "You're fat and have a history of diabetes in your family so therefore you must also have high blood pressure" sermon, I'm not wanting to give them any amo such as being hyped up on caffiene. Oops. Naughty Bren. But I can pretty much do the blood test any time, and damnit, I needed deserved the coffee.

Well, you know, they don't actually say I'm fat, because they're all politically correct. And they don't want to offend me too much as they shove their fist up my backside in order to steal my pay check. Doctors can be nice that way you know.

Mmmm...coffee...yeah so where was I? Actually I've been making the rounds to everyone's blogs. Redesigns everywhere! I'm amazed. I'm thinking of doing several things to celebrate getting mine up and going with the domain. Hope you're all into games and links and what not. I'm feeling frisky, and well to be honest, it's time I ripped off some great ideas that other people have already had. Heh. I love blogs and I love the little games. Oh yes I do.

Anyways I should so my work and then head back to the lab. Kisses.

 
Gratuitous Swearing

This whole post could be filled with explitives, but since I'm assuming you're an imaginative bunch you can make up your own. I'm tired and I think I have a cold this morning and I can barely breathe.

My entries are not showing up as they should. It's a pain in the ass. Seriously. However I'm 50% finished with the new layout. If my webhost is working tonight, as it wasn't last night, I expect to finish. So here's to hoping!

 
Try, try, try again..

I swear I posted earlier today. It's not here. So if you don't see it, it's okay because I don't see it either. Although it could be like one of those group hallucinations, but I kind of doubt it. To top it off I can't really remember what the post was about. There isn't a whole lot happening lately. You know, except the wonderful things that I've already mentioned. That I'm painting again and continuing to read my books. Go me!

I'm working on my new layout. For real this time. I'm on my third possible design idea. I've pretty much given up a whole new look and I'm sticking now with what works for me. So it'll be somewhat similar to this layout, except it'll have a whole new mood and an entirely different feel because of the header graphic. Heh. I went bonkers in photoshop. Why? Because I can, and because I love that program a little too much. And because I'm paranoid about having recognizable images on my page and I am too cheap to pay for stock photos when I've already bought a domain.

So I should have the layout completed by the end of the week. Probably. It's just that I'm fighting with writing my html from scratch after so many years of using the editor at Geoshitties. Well that and I'm totally new to the world of ftp and I'm going kicking and screaming into the learning abyss. I'm a visual learner, so everything that I pick up online is simply a miracle because I don't do well reading and learning. Not well at all. Everyone pats me on the head though and all is well. And finally I'd get a lot more done on the whole layout if my host would quit being such a bitch, and yes I'm saying that with a smile. I keep getting ftp errors that generate random numbers that are supposed to mean something to me. 106601 to you too buddy! Heh.

Anyways I'm going to finish my stinky breath food consisting of onion rings, and blow out my rain scented candle and go tuck my little tush into beddy bye. All the while praying to all that is holy that I'll fall asleep and not lay there for two more hours like I've been doing. It's total hell on waking up early. And it would be nice to get to work on time.

Oh yeah, work. Heh. It sounds like this summer might possibly be insanely busy. I really hope so. But we're getting figures in on some of the touristy stuff around here and numbers have been very high. We're guessing that a lot of it is because of the wave of patriotism in the United States after September 11th. Living next to a shrine of democracy could really benefit us. This makes me feel a lot better, after all, Mama's gotta pay off her car.

Anyways it's time for that sleep thing I mentioned because I'm rambling. Amen.

 
A Day's Work

I thought I'd showcase my afternoon's progress. It isn't finished, perhaps it's about half done. I'm exhausted, but very happy with what I've accomplished. Of course with only a webcam to capture what's been worked it doesn't do a very good job. But here's an idea at least.

The work in progress.

A tired Bren.

Together.

What isn't shown is that the flower is actually more of a creamy yellow color, and of course all the brush work. But it's all there. More buds need to be added and more lighting in the background as well as more leaves and such.

In a totally unrelated subject, I went to the 80s party last night. We didn't stay all night because I'm really allergic to cigarrette smoke and we were sitting next to some really heavy smokers, and sitting right under the speakers, AND there was a fan vent blowing the smoke directly into my eyes and nose. I couldn't breathe and my eyes were burning, so I totally wimped out. It was fun, and the music was great but only for a little while.

But while we were there this guy came up to our table. He was much older (40s?) and very creepy in so much that he made me not only uncomfortable, but made me squirm. I don't know why I always wind up the target. He asked several questions of us trying to engage us in conversation but we were stonily silent. It was the oddest thing.

him-What do you guys do?
Kath-Work.
Me-(sat there staring at him with the whole smoldering thing going on.)
him-What do you guys do for fun?
Kath-Drink. A lot.
Me-(pretty much the same staring thing while I idly stir my drink.)
him-So um, you guys live together? (cue hopeful look that we're lesbians.)
Kath-Yeah we do.
him-Coooool!
Silence for a couple of cold akward moments. Finally he asks,
him-So like, do you guys have cats?
Kath-Cats?!?
him-Er yeah, like the little furry things? (Suddenly he waves around a wedding ring which he'd been hiding that hand under the table.) Me and the wife have two we're trying to give away.
Kath-(she just starts to look at him as I've been doing and he begins to squirm.)
him-Yeah well, it's been nice talking to you guys.

At this point he does the oddest thing. He reaches over the small table and touches my chin and pulls it up so that I'm staring directly into his eyes. I'm totally frozen not sure what to do at this point. He stares at me for a moment and then lets go and looks me up and down and leaves his eyes on my chest and says, "You know, you really are a very beautiful woman." Then he let me go and walked off.

Creepy for sure. But anyways that was my night last night.

 
Break All Rules

My new rule is of course to break every rule that I know I should follow. Because, quite simply I feel great.

I have three songs on repeat, and what weird songs to be listening together. NIN Closer, LedZepplin D'yer M'ker, and that song that Jay sent me, Pretty When You Cry. I'm quite sure that I'm a freak. But it's okay with me because guess what?

I'm PAINTING! God it feels good too. It's nearly better than sex. I have no clue why I haven't done it in six or more years. I'm rustier than a hundred year old iron nail in the middle of nowhere. But it's slowly becoming something. I always start with one image and just work it until something starts to appear. I have the weirdest style. It's somewhere between photo realistic, impressionist, classical renissance. I don't know why exactly and I should take photo real out of there simply because I never acheive this. But it's one of my influences.

I'm so incredibly mellow and relaxed and in the zone. It's a place I've missed being. I think it's too big to scan or I'd give you an "in progress peak" at what I'm working on. But maybe the surprise will be more fun. Ahhh...I'm rambling happily.

 
My Worst Enemy

You know, I think if I really want something I need to NOT tell anyone about it or write about it in here because then that garuntees that it won't happen or I won't get it or that I'll chicken out or that I'll do something I said I wouldn't. I should live by this rule always.

But no, I mention things like, "I don't want to spend money." The first thing I did when I got off work today was buy candles at Pier 1. Why? Do they really smell nicer than the nice smelling candles at say...WalMart? Um...YES! Yes they fucking do! Woooo! maybe they just have more variety of smells.

So two extravagant candles later and in an artsy mood I ask Kath if it's okay to post pone her nap maybe half an hour more. She agrees when I explain that I just sort of wanted to roam the aisles at the hobby store. We fight our way through traffic which is a total bitch today by the way, and arrive at the most magnificent hobby store of all. Hobby Lobby, filled with all sorts of hobbiness goodness for me to gawk at for hours.

I blame Trading Spaces for this I really do. It's just a good thing I don't spend my days at home or I'd be watching nothing but design shows like that on the Learning Channel because I'm that asinine. I rent, it's not like watching these shows can help me with home improvements since I don't own anything to improve upon. I also live with my anal-retentive-pushing-40-acting-like-a-14-year-old-sister who's design tastes are the opposite of tres cool.

I'm off my rocker because after spending a small bundle last time on gorgeous paper and trusty colored pencils so that I could draw, and draw in color no less, I haven't drawn a damn thing except my sketches in my sketch book. The gorgeous paper sits patiently tucked away in a little nook next to my portfolio stuffed with all my old favorite drawings, and the pencils are scattered hither and yon. So today, history seemed destined to repeat itself. The paints were crying out to me in their lonliness. Begging me to rescue them from the indefinite shelf life in the hobby store, aching to come home with me. How could I refuse?

Seven tubes of acrylic, a canvas, some thinner, and some brushes later I escaped by the skin of my teeth. I rushed home for fear that another store would cry out to me, that there would be some lonely item needing a new home with me.

I think I'm certifiable, if not a whole hell of a lot worse. At the very least I'm my own worst enemy.

 
Afternoon Rambles

I have the afternoon off, which is good because I was in the mood to have if off. So there. I was going to have yesterday off and Bev was supposed to be able to be home and help me out with my layout woes. Only we both wound up working. I wish work would quit interferring with my page here. Bahahaha. Yeah right, so um, anyways I rented movies last night and today instead of working on the layout I'm getting some other things done.

I'm going in to see Ducine and redo my manicure. With all the mechanic work that I've been doing on the machines at work lately the nails have suffered unfairly. I wish I wasn't such a girly girl that it mattered what my hands looked like, but it does. I just feel like if my nails aren't gorgeous it doesn't matter if I look like a bombshell. I need to be the whole package damnit! Heh.

Anyways I also have been cleaning because I need to crate up some of my art work at my folks and bring it here. Before I crate it permanently for storage though, Bill has graciously offered to help me photograph most of it. He was actually shocked to find out that I even did art work. It was quite a hoot, and I wish I had a picture of his face when I told him that I was actually an artist and photography wasn't something I even considered myself good at. But it'll be nice to get decent photos of my work finally. I wish I had wall space that I could frame and hang some of my still lifes. I really love some of them and it's fun to see my different moods in my work.

I'm hoping that once I get some of my work around me in some manner that I might be a little more inspired to do some fresh things. Other than the sketches I've done to see if I can still even do it. I'm aching to paint. I have a primed canvas that's been sitting bare for nearly six years now. I don't know what goes on it, but I'm sure that something does. I'm also trying to figure out how I could concievibly paint in this little apartment, but I'm sure it could be done.

Tonight Kath is in the mood to go out. And there's a 80's part at one of the bars in town, so I'm going to see if we can get a few people together to go. I don't think it's my sister's thing at all to go to a theme night at a bar, but it sounds fun to me. Besides I knew there was a good reason that I collected all those Madonna posters. Now I'll know how to dress. Anyone have a pair of lace gloves with the fingers cut out that I can borrow? No? Oh well, maybe Ducine will have some ideas. I'm sort of hoping she's planning on going so if Kath won't go I can hook up with her group instead.

Time to go wash the cars and paint the nails. Kisses.

 
Friday Five via Smattering.

1. What was the first thing you ever cooked?
Toast. I burnt it. I still burn toast to this day.

2. What's your signature dish?
Actually I have a lot of signature dishes. It all depends on who I'm cooking for. When I'm home I make omlettes because my dad is addicted to them and he claims its the only thing I can cook, and I do it better than my mom. If I'm having friends over I'm famous for my lasagnae or manicotti. If I can get away with it I love to cook enchiladas, but not as many people like enchiladas as like my Italian dishes.

3. Ever had a cooking disaster? (tasted like crap, didn't work, etc.) Describe.
I'm most famous/infamous for Kraft Dinner disasters. No you really can't screw up plain KD, but when you get bored with it as I did, and add stuff to it. Hilarity and vomiting might ensue. I guess my scariest KD was when I added a pint of spicy homemade salsa and a diced chicken breast and then added habenero sauce. I ate it, but it burnt my insides out. It took me a year or more to grow back a lining to my stomach. But I'm all better now.

4. If skill and money were no object, what would make for your dream meal?
I absolutely have no clue. I don't really have a dream meal I guess.

5. What are you doing this weekend?
I'm going to beat Kath over the head and try to force her into making a decision on vacation. The money is in the bank and I have other things to spend it on if she's not going to name a destination. Bill wants to sell me a camera. A professional one no less. I'm nervous and excited as it's going to be a wonderful camera at an amazingly cheap price. Other than that I'm going to try to NOT spend any money until I know what it needs spent on. I'm also going to try to go tanning. White girl is starting to glow in the dark here.

 
My Funny Valentine

I was working. You know, doing actual work while I was at work. It was a great day for actually working and not just looking like I was working while I was instead actually praying to the powers that be that people would bring me work to do. Three really neat things happened today.

One was that I've decided after all that I DO want to go on a cruise. I've been arguing with my sister over that for over a year that it just didn't sound fun to me. It seemed cheesy and cliched somehow. But I've done soooo many rolls of films of cruises at work. Today I did seven rolls of a Jamacian cruise and they had such fun things to do on that one. I'm telling her that if she wants and we can find a way to actually do it, I'd love a Jamacian cruise.

The next really neat thing was that Kath stopped in to wish me a Happy Valentine's Day. I giggled and told her she was silly. Then she whipped out gormet carmel corn and a teensy box of chocolates. I giggled but I couldn't stop grinning. Carmel corn is my ultimate weakness. It was so thoughtful, alibiet embarrassing that she showed up to work to bestow these wondrous munchies on me.

The third really neat thing that happened to me today was that a lady came to pick up a restoration that I did for her. It was to be a Valentine's Day gift to her husband that she's madly in love with. The unique thing is that they've been married over ten years now and her gift to him was a picture she had me do where I took a picture of each of them as young children and put them together. It was so adorable, and no one would guess that the picture she has now of the composite isn't an original. She was so excited, she asked my name and then had me come out and thanked me personally for such a beautiful job. It really was so moving that she was so touched by the work. It also made me feel especially wonderful and proud of the work that I do.

So now tonight I'm off to do more neat things and wish my sister a happy day as well with gifts of Tigger to grace her bed. Oh, and chocolate. In order to tell your sister that you truly love her you must give her chocolate and silly stuffed toys. It's a rule I think. I hope you all have a wonderful day too with those that you love.

 
Leap Frog Love

There's this really interesting thing that I've sort of stumbled onto. Every time I find a new blog, I can usually find another blog I seriously like from that person's linklove. It's amazing. So I keep finding more and more and more people that I have to see what they do every single day.

So today, as I was wandering around a link from a link, I found a new blog. And wouldn't you know it? Today is her one year blogaversary. She's got a wonderful blog, and she also runs her page off of moveable type, which as I find more moveable type pages I'm liking them more and more. But that's all beside the point. What made me take notice of her is that each day she asks a question. Here is today's.

What one song can make you break down into a pile of snot and tears? You know, that song that makes you think of the first time you kissed, an old love that you wish you never broke up with, the day you got married, divorced or laid..In other words, your most emotional song. Song and story behind it please.

Normally I would have just answered it in her comment's as you're meant to do. But instead I thought that the two or three people who haven't seen her that come here should go check her out and I can get her some hits for her blogaversary. After all, my own one year blogaversary is coming up very soon! So here is my answer to her question.

I'm not a very musical person. People often ask me what type of music I like and typically I laugh and say whatever is on the radio or whatever my friends are listening to. So going by that you can tell that I really don't get drawn into music all that much. So you wouldn't even think that there would be a song. But there is and it has a lengthy explanation, or perhaps I'm just exceedingly long winded. Don't tell me which you think I am, I'm fragile damnit. Heh.

You've all heard about the boy, Bradley. My one true love. The whole tragic tale. How we broke up, got back together, broke up, stayed friends, nearly got engaged, and then lived together, then I left him, and he moved out, and then he died. Whew, what a long sentence. But anyways, back in the days when we were in high school and spent this amazingly magic summer together before he went off to the Coast Guard he had an obsession with Clint Black.

More importantly he had an obsession with one song that Clint Black sung with Wynonna Judd called, "A Bad Goodbye". He'd make me sing it with him because it was a duet, but the premise of it all was that the man didn't want to leave the woman with a bad goodbye, he wanted her to just let him go. At least that's how I took it. I'd look it up for you, but it's enough that I'm sharing this story without taking another look at the lyrics. The last time I heard this song was a year ago riding in a car with my little brother. I sat and quietly fought the tears as they streamed down my face. He growled at me for still being so emotionally attatched to Brad, who was his best friend by the way, but thankfully turned the song off.

But basically the whole reason for his obsession was that he was leaving very soon to go into the Coast Guard and he didn't want to leave any strings dangling behind him. Mainly me. He wanted a fun romantic summer, but he also wanted it to come to a nice clean end and we'd still be 'friends.' Well unfortunately for both of us, I fell madly in love with him and 18 year old girls in love don't give up so easy. We wound up bitter and not talking to each other for many months.

Then he got sick. He later would tell me that when he was really sick, and at one point had been close to dying, that he had realized how important I was to him. Even if we couldn't figure out exactly what type of relationship we had, he knew it was important. And we never really did figure it out either. But years later when we were living together I made the decision that I couldn't live with him any more because I didn't feel safe with his drug addiction and I couldn't help him because he refused to help himself.

It was one of the hardest things I've ever done. What's more is that we never really worked it out or reconciled it and he abruptly passed away. He was just gone, with no goodbye, let alone even a bad one. So there is my sad story for all of you. Heh. It's not as sad as it once was, and I've grown much more as a person since then. You move on, but you never really forget.

 
Learning Sucks!

Bev has me thisclose to figuring out how to do my next html trick. Although I learned some things on my own. I opened an old program that I have on my computer that I've barely used and merely takes up space on my harddrive like the useless whore that it is. I suppose I really COULD use it more often. But that requires me dusting off my lazy brain. Like THAT is going to happen!

I'm feeling sassy today. Perhaps it was because of a bit of the round and round with Kath last night. Perhaps it was because I had a little heart to heart with Bev. Who knows, I'm the oddest duck of them all.

Today is Ash Wednesday. I have to be the most screwed up Catholic girl one could ever wish for. I've broken more commandments than even exist I'm sure. And if I were a better Catholic I could tell you about them all, as it is I never got around to making my first confession. I just made sure I got my booty baptized after those naughty bouts of adultery and made me all shiny and new again. Man I have a bad attitude. It's probably because I just ate meat, which you're not supposed to do on Ash Wednesday or for every Friday through the Lenten Season. I should also give up something. I thought about giving up sex, but I'm not having any to give up anyways. And who am I kidding? Given the opportunity I'd probably jump the proper person if I had the chance to. I've given up coca-cola before, but as I've already gulped down my daily dosage of that I'm thinking I need to pick something else. Chocolate? We shall see.

I am in the midst of a second re-redesign. You all aren't going to get to see the first one. I'd be committing a major faux pas by doing two pink layouts in a row anyways. So I'm going with my crazy lunatic mood swing theme. It might not last, but damnit I'm determined to learn something. I can't beleive I just said that.

Anyways more foo foo stuff later. Off to work. Now where did I leave my clothes.

 
Catty Things Said Last Night

Kath irritates me soooo bad sometimes. She is so unreasonable as to make me go completely insane. So I make fun of her until she realizes it. At times it takes her awhile to catch on. Last night was a perfect example.

Me Do I need to buy handsoap again already?
Kath We can't be out of handsoap yet. You just got some.
MeYeah I know, but there is none at the sink and I need to wash the chemical off from work.

At ths point she walks in and laughs.

Kath Silly the handsoap is in the shower.
Me Right because we all wash out hands in the shower.
Kath No, I used it when I first got my tattoo because I needed a mild soap.
Me Oh, right because handsoap is more mild than body wash.
Kath I didn't think you could get more mild than Ivory soap.
Me Well I can understand how Dove bodywash would seem harsh. I mean doves are violent harsh creatures. You skin would probably fall off if you used that soap. I'll get more handsoap.

She didn't say much. She just sat there blinking at me. I was a bit rough but she annoys me so bad. We cooked steaks last night and she started cooking hers cos we cook them one at a time because she can't cook. So I always do my own, but she swears she doesn't like how I do it so she insists on doing her own. Which is fine. But last night she cooks her steak on low heat until it's completely well done. She adds no salt or pepper and then douses the nice cut with ketchup and complains that it's "flavorless."

I shook my head and turned the heat up a little, seasoned my steak and seared each side of my steak and then cooked it to medium. I suggested it might be the way she cooked it and showed her my perfect juicy steak and she actually told me that perhaps I had a nicer steak than she did.

Someone save me!

 
Working Hard at Hardly Working

Today was the most bizzarre day at work in that I wasn't busy, but I came home exhausted. I got a lot done, but the weird thing was that I didn't know it needed done. I do all the tedious little maintenance things on all our printers. Today I worked on three different machines and my back and shoulders ache from all the effort.

I also cleaned out a room which is to become my "office" area where I'll eventually have a computer to do restorations on. Bill went to get me some sort of 'table' today which will hold the computer. I didn't see it, but I'm assuming he got one because he almost always does whatever he says he will. I had to hide a chuckle as he said he was going to get a cheap table, but immediately changed it to a good table instead of cheap. He's always lecturing me on not getting cheap things. I waited until he was out of earshot and then had a good laugh. It's always funny when people do the very things they tell others not to do.

I took way too much time off this morning, but I don't feel the slightest bit guilty because I didn't bill them hours for the whole time I was gone and then didn't take a lunch. I feel justified and slightly naughty all at the same time. It's not like I had real stuff that HAD to be done to do.

I'm in a real dark mood and I can really tell by the music I'm listening to. For some reason I seriously like Godsmack. I feel weird saying that as I'm this midwest farmer's daughter type of person and should be consequently listening to the Beach Boys or Brittany You-Know-Who. Instead I've got Godsmack and NIN on heavy rotation. I have a new one that Jay sent me mixed in. It was the first time I listened to it because when I first got it it said the file didn't work. It's called "Pretty When You Cry" and it's dark yet seriously good. I love it like crazy.

Seems to fit me lately as everyone keeps asking me why I am so moody. I honestly don't know why I am so moody. I'm having a hard time with it. I'm hoping that when I get that doctor's appointment they'll be able to tell me something other than that I'm going crazy. I'm ultra sensitive to people. They'll tease me and I'll take it the wrong way and be really hurt. I know I am unreasonable yet helpless because I can't really do anything about it.

I'm also constantly thinking about Rob suddenly. I haven't seen him since before I quit working at the video store. In fact I think the last time I saw him might have been the Christmas Party. Yet I'm not sure on that. But it's so strange. Suddenly he's on my mind again and he hasn't really been since perhaps a week or maybe two after my last day. I have no clue as to why I'm thinking about him again. I am even dreaming about him. Nothing huge or that I could even write down in any kind of format the way I write the other dreams down. I don't remember enough to document it.

But he's there when I close my eyes. I hear fragments of our conversations. His deep voice on repeat and whispering intimately to me, "Brenda, you know how I am." And my soft, breathy reply, "Yes Rob, I know how you are." Our two voices back and forth entertwining in my head. His tired posture, the way his hands shake when he's hopped up on caffiene, the way he ducks under the hanging signs because he's so tall, the way his jeans drape his legs, and the blue-green color of his eyes etched into my mind so that I see it all played in my head when I'm trying to rest. I'm simply amazed because those things haven't been IN or ON my mind for about two months, until the last few nights/days.

I'm renting a movie for Thursday night to console myself because Friends won't be on. Perhaps he'll either be there, or Anna will be and I can ask her where he is. I hate admitting it, but I've already thought of the most casual way of asking her about him. Because, you know, I can't just out and out ask about him like...I'm interested in him. Heh.

 
Elmer Fudd Ain't Got Nothing On Me Baby!

Shhhhh! I'm werking! Hehehehehehehehehe. Here wittle scanner. Hehehehehehe.

Okay so my Elmer Fudd impersonation really needs work. So sue me. Or shoot me and put me out of my misery. You choose as either one would work for me. We're so slow at work Bill sent me home to work on some things and I'm going to do it...s-l-o-w-l-y. As proof on the way home I stopped and got one of my iced caramel lattes, but only got a tripple so I could at least pass as human instead of the hyper megolamaniac that I truly am. Actually I'm not really a hyper megolamaniac, but I've always wanted to use megolamaniac in a sentence. I'm not entirely sure what it means although I am sure that I did know at one time. I need to spend more time reading Paige's words she gives us every day. She probably knows what it means. Anyways go coffee go! As you can see it's doing it's work because I hop from thought to thought and ramble endlessly. Aren't I truly adorable?

Just going to recap a few thoughts from the last couple days. My brother and sister-in-law never reached us Sunday. I'm pissed as hell as there is this huge ass (technical term for extremely large) lasagnae in my refridgerator. You're all invited for the yummiest leftovers ever. I've even got booze. Ahem.

I finished my first book that I bought on my spending spree two weekends ago now. It was Anne Rice's, Merrick, which is yet another book in her vampire chronicles. I know, last week I said vampires creep me out, and well they do. But they're so very fun to read about as long as they belong to Anne Rice and not to Pentiction, BC.

Last night I started tackling the next books that I bought which was a desk set of The Lord of The Rings which also includes The Hobbit. But just so you know that I'm not normal at all, I started with the third book which is actually the second in the trilogy because I needed to know what happens to Frodo and Samwise. I couldn't wait another year to see what happens next. Although I've heard that if you go see the movie again soon, there will be previews of the second movie which is slated to come out this next December. Who wants to be teased for that long though?

I've also updated some of my linkage and taken my beloved Shel and moved him to my list of links rather than the aortal site. It isn't that I don't think he's wonderful enough to stay there, because the man has one of the biggest boobie fetishes I've ever seen which is a good thing, but I needed to put something new in there. So I put Ag in there even though she's already a link. Why you might ask? Because the woman went and got a domain and did yet another redesign, all after I bought MY domain and have YET to stick a design in there. And if it counts, I have it designed in my head.

Sunday was spent seeing my daddy for his birthday. I spoiled him and it was a relatively painless affair, unlike the usual trips home. Plus I remembered to get my much loved hairbrush and bring back. It's been there since we spent the night at Christmas. It's taken me this long to figure out WHERE I left it. Heh. Oh, and I also discovered the cause of the pesky mystery of why my icq was showing me online when I definitely was not. I had left the user set to 'me' instead of 'mom' on my mother's computer at home. So everytime she was online it said that I was online. She never uses it and doesn't even know what it is. I giggle when I think of all the messages people must have sent to her instead of me.

And because there was a little wondering and it doesn't bother me now to say it, and it did bother me a couple of days ago, here is the reason I've been slightly upset lately. When I had my chat with my mom the other day over my health she said I was showing symptoms of diabetes. Which I have to go in every couple of years anyways to be checked for it. The main reason being that I have diabetes on both sides of my family and with all my health issues growing up, the doctors always targeted me as the person most likely to get it out of anyone in my family. Which I suppose is slightly logical when you look at the rest of my siblings. Anyways I've had some things going on lately that were cause for concern and I didn't know which doctor I ought to go to so I mentioned what was happening to my mother.

She told me that my aunt's diabetes had started this very same way. My aunt has had pretty severe diabetes since she was in her early 20s, but she has had a healthy life and is still doing fairly well in her 60s now. I think if I do have it, I'm much more likely to have a very mild form that can easily be controled with diet versus my aunt who has insulin shots in her hip daily. And I'm okay with it no matter what it might be because I'm confident that I could do what I had to do to take care of myself. BUT here I am rambling and we don't know if I have it or not.

So, the deal is that my tax return should be in my bank account in the next couple of days, and soon as it is I'm seeing a doctor. I'm going to tell him what's been going on and we'll get my usual blood work done. It could just be that I'm over stressed because I worry about work too much. Which is typical of me. I over stress about a lot of things. When I get more stuff going on in my life the stress goes down because my worry is spread out over many things instead of just one thing. Since all I have is work, thats what I think about the most which isn't good for me. Heh.

So now, everyone is caught up with me and Bev won't have to pump me full of zoloft.

 
Kharma Is a Bitch

I feel this morning like kharma took one look at yesterdays post about my dream and saw how good it made me feel and totally bitch slapped me for it. Because last night was a truly horrible dream.

I was in some sort of prison or other sort of institution. We were all taking tests. They looked like the kind I always took in college where it was one slim piece of paper with little circles for "a, b, c, and d" that you had to fill in with a No. 2 pencil. If you scored badly you would pay the ultimate price. But before all that started to happen there were people there that were to be thinned out immediately.

You'd go into these rooms that looked a little like classrooms. You'd sit in these seats or on benches that made it seem like you were in a lecture hall, but keep in mind there were bars on all the doors and there were no windows at all. Up at the front of the room instead of chalkboards and other teacher paraphanelia there was a little caged off area and huge men who were executioners. You knew which of your fellow companions were meant to die because they were naked and it was dirty in the rooms because people were so scared they were getting sick and urinating and all sorts of grisly things.

As it became each person's turn for their execution they'd stand up and two men would haul them forward forcibly and they'd be taken inside the cage and made to sit in this chair. They were strapped down and the chair leaned forward and then you could see how the chair was actually a guillotine. Their heads would be poked through this little opening in the cage and a huge heavy blade would come down to remove their head. You heard the thump and felt the blood spatter no matter how tightly your eyes were closed and no matter how roughly you tried to cover your ears.

They went in order and as people were taken from the front more had to scoot forward to take their place. I was sitting there huddled with a nude Michelle. We were both crying and holding each other. I wasn't nude, so it meant I was not to be executed, but they did mean to punish me by making me watch as Michelle was. It was horrible. We had our arms wrapped around each other tightly and tears were streaming down our face. She told me that I didn't have to stay, but I wanted to be there for her. She said not at the end, I didn't have to see, just wait til it was her turn to go up. I knew they'd let me go at that point too.

Eventually it got to be her turn and we held tightly to each other for one last moment and then I had to go. I stumbled towards the back my eyes closed and my ears covered by my hands. Against my will I heard the slam of the blade and I felt liquid splatter against my back. I rushed out of the room and began to furiously look for a way out.

I was upset, but I was also confused. I didn't know why we were being executed and I felt as if I had to hurry or they'd decide I was next. I went from to room to room. If an execution had started you had to sit in the room until it was over and the next person was brought up. There was blood, but there was also a lot of water because they were constantly hosing the ground off to move the blood out.

It was grisly and the rooms all ran together eventually so it all looked the same. You'd step out of the hallway and into a new room only it would look just like the last room. I got more and more upset. I was busy trying not to see things because there began to be stock piles of headless bodies around. Then I noticed something upsetting. As I stumbled around my clothing seemed to be disappearing of it's own volition. I was now shirtless and shoeless.

As I stumbled into a final room I looked up and saw that one of the executioners was Michelle. I gasped and watched her do her work. Yes it was definitely her. I wanted to ask how it could be when our eyes met. But I knew I hadn't actually seen her die. She stared coldly into my eyes for a moment and someone pushed me forward, ripping the rest of my clothing off of me. I was nude now, and apparently I was next.

She walked up to me, lay her hand on my cheeck and stared into my eyes before manuvering me into the chair.

Startled, I woke up at that point. I was crying. I shook it off, surprised it was still so dark and tried to sleep. But everytime my eyes closed I was stumbling from room to room again. Like I was unable to escape the dream.

 
GAH!

I feel so silly. It took me hours to get up the courage to post my last post and I can't even say why. I should be brave more often I'm sure, but for some reason it just gets harder and harder for me. I wish I was strong enough to say I just don't care about who reads what. Or probably the more correct thing to say would be, that I wish I were strong enough to say I don't care what people think about me or anything they find out about me. I'm such a chicken so much of the time. And a worrier even though I pretend I'm not either of those things. People call me on my bluffs so often and accuse me of lying to them, but really I'm fooling myself as much as anyone.

And I also added to all the info you can dig up on moi. I don't know why, but I just did.

 
Dream a Little Dream

I dream all the time and often have nightmares, but since I started writing them down I've had fewer of them. Instead now I have dreams that are weird, but pretty normal really. When there is something in them that I don't understand I look it up in my book. When I have friends that dream weird things, I look it up in my book. It gives me comfort. Amazing comfort.

So I am about to go into a lot of history here for you, and a lot of detail. I've finished one of my books from last week and you can tell I've spent all week long reading a very descriptive book. Because that's how the next entry is going to go. If you get bored, it's fine, I'll probably write something more up your alley in a day or two. But right now I want this time to just do my thing the only way I can. So if you skip it, you skip it.

In the dream I was with some little kids, a boy and a girl, and I can't remember who they were now but in the dream I knew them. Perhaps they were me and my little brother, it feels right to say that but again I stress that I don't know it for sure because many details escaped as I woke up fully. The weird thing was that we were in my dad's parent's house. Only the house was in good shape, not the shape that I always knew it to be in.

The house was always a shambles so far as I remember, with no indoor plumbing. I'm not sure if it even had a bathroom in it but it must have had at one time. I know it had a kitchen sink that they piled things in, but to wash your hands there was a wash basin and you had to pour fresh water into it to wash your hands and then dump out the dirty water if need be, or not if your hands weren't very dirty. You conserved so that more trips to the well didn't have to be made. Fresh water sat nearby with a dipper if you wanted a glass of water. And if you had to use the bathroom, there was an outhouse nearby. If you've never had to use one it's the most vile disgusting thing that you could imagine.

When I was a kid we'd drive out to the house to visit and to get milk from the farm. I hated going and I hated the milk. To this day I hate milk. I never could stomach it and it just sours my stomach. The house that they all lived in was old military housing from the 40's maybe. It was just one long building and not very wide, with one hallway that ran the length of the house in the center. And they lived there like packrats. The tile on the floor was coming up and if you weren't careful you'd trip over it as you walked from room to room. Everything was coated in a fine covering of dust year round because half the windows were broken out and had been covered up with newspapers. The house was heated from one woodstove in the living area of one end of the house. It was cold in the winter time and everyone would huddle out there on the broken down couches. The furniture was probably from the 50's and 60's and every single piece had the insides taped into them with duct tape so you weren't sitting on the wood beams and coils of the springs.

I guess when I was older I hated going there because I was ashamed of how they lived, but at first I was just incredibly uncomfortable while I was there. My grandmother never had teeth that I ever remember and she'd pinch us kids and grab at our baby fat and tell us we looked like our mother and maybe we weren't really her grandkids. And we didn't want to be either. Our grandfather would just look on and laugh at the spectacle and we'd hide behind our mother. If I were there with my father I'd stand beside him and he wouldn't allow anyone to do those things to me. And let me clarify one last thing, the only reason I was ashamed of how they lived when I got older, was because I knew they only lived that way because they were lazy and cheap. It wasn't because they were poor and couldn't afford a better lifestyle. In fact, I knew that they could. Another thing that I knew was that my grandfather was cheap and didn't want to spend money on the luxury of indoor plumbing. That is the truth in so far as I know it. It was the 80s and 90s and it could have been different.

So in the dream, the windows were not broken, and it was summer time. Everything in the house was clean and amazingly the furniture although it was old, was in good repair with no busted springs or duct tape. It was comfortable and I think there were bright lamps everywhere. The kids were telling me I had to try on dresses and I was and it was fun. There was even a large mirror where I could see my reflection. In the store room on the very outter edge of the house there were all these dresses on this big store rack in all colors.

Something else was truly bizzarre, but let me explain something first. My hair is very curly, and it's shoulder length now and the red tones that are in it naturally have been enhanced with months and months of coloring it a deep rich auburn. Naturally my hair is a deep golden blonde and I wear glasses. I've worn the glasses since I was two years old because some stupid expert said I had to. I've had doctors that tell me now that my vision probably could have been corrected with an eye patch like pirates wear. If that had been done there's a good chance I wouldn't need my glasses now, but as it is they are like part of my body. I'm also chubby. Yes I am, I'm curvy and round just everywhere and all over me. My cheeks are plump, my tummy is round and not thin and concave like the women you see on television and my legs are soft and curvy, and I have chubby woman breasts. They're not little and they are a focal point of many people if I wear a low-cut shirt. It's just how I look and how I am. It's taken me years to become accostomed to this body when I see the gorgeous women in magazines and on tv.

In my dream my hair was long, long the way it was when I was a teenager. Long down to my waist, and instead of it's natural color it was red the way it's been for months now. Normally when we dream we have a picture in our heads of how we look to ourselves. And normally in my dreams my hair is shoulder length, although in past dreams it's been long, but most of the time it's blonde. But I notice here lately I look a lot different in my dreams. I'm thin not scary thin, but a lot thinner, and I've got long red hair, and I don't wear glasses. In this dream I was gorgeous, my long red hair falling freely until I started trying on the dresses and I caught it all up in this little crystal clip and my curls all seemed to arrange themselves all around my face. I looked like I was out of a magazine as I tried on dresses.

The kids would hand me dresses and I'd protest saying I couldn't wear that cut as I was too chubby for it, or it wouldn't look right because it was cut wrong on top. You only understand what types of cuts of dresses you can wear when you have large breasts. Everyone loves gorgeous women with them, yet realistically they're just a huge pain and an embarrassment a lot of the time.

But in the dream every single dress fit comfortably and I remember looking down and seeing everything fit very naturally over my breasts. It was odd. There were even a few dresses that had the midsections that were made of see through material or lace and it showed off my midsection and they looked good. I'd never show off my tummy, but it was very natural to in the dream. Somehow the dresses changed from formal dresses of silk and taffeta in bright shades of magenta, and tourquoise, and indigo, and off white to white dresses. In fact they all became wedding dresses.

The children said it was smarter to pick out a white wedding dress and have a formal wedding. And I realized I was getting married. It felt kind of silly and goofy and the children and I giggled at a lot of the dresses. So I tried on wedding dress after wedding dress. Eventually we picked out a dress that we liked and they had me trying on bridesmaid dresses. I laughed and said maybe the kids should dress up too because they'd be in my wedding also. They shook their heads no, but we were all smiling when someone came in the living area in the room next to us. I came out into the light of that room wearing a deep red violet dress that had a tight bodice and buttoned up to my neck with a mandarin collar and was trimmed in white satin piping with a very beautiful oriental style.

As I stepped into the light of the other room a man walked in. In my dream I knew who he was. So did the kids. It was someone I knew and he was the one I was getting married to. I just remember smiling a lot and being smiled at and this comforting feeling. It was wonderful. He knew I'd been trying dresses on and he teased me about seeing which dress I'd picked out and the kids protested saying it was bad luck for him to see me in my wedding dress. We all laughed and then I woke up.

In all it was a strange dream because I looked so very different. It was a huge difference because I was in that house that has now been torn down five or six years now. It doesn't even exist except in my dreams now. The children, if they were indeed my little brother and I, no longer exist. And the man, what about him? I wonder if he only exists in my dreams too. But it wasn't so strange because it was just really nice. In the dream I remember feeling incredibly happy and loved.

 
When It Snows It Blows

Sort of like when it rains it pours only a lot colder. We've been having a wind storm since last night and this morning woke to a veritable blizzard. Only it wasn't a real blizzard, only a pretend one. You know, one of those storms that only drops an inch or two and then blows it all over the place so you can't see a damn thing. But I made it to work, only to get sent home by Bill. He just said there wouldn't be enough people out and about and I might as well stay where it was warm.

So I went grocery shopping, stalking up incase we'd be holed up the rest of the weekend. I made it home and the weather did a 180 as the wind died down and the sun came out and melted all the snow. It was the most bizzarre thing. Kath then informed me that our older brother called and they were in town for a dart tournament. And she told me if it was okay with me we could go watch this afternoon. I figured it sounded like as good a plan as any.

Before we went over there we got a call from my mother. Reminding me that tomorrow was my father's birthday. I told her I'd never forget a parent's birthday and giggled guiltily and she just laughed. She said we could bring dad flowers for her to enjoy if we wanted. I laughed some more and then we talked about a couple of things. She's convinced me that I need to see a doctor for some of my ailments.

I grew up sick so much of the time that I absolutely hate seeing doctors now. I've been poked and prodded and not in the good way. That and I feel like it's a total waste of money because nobody ever figures anything out at all. But this time I'm showing some definite symptoms that need checked out, and even though it's probably nothing we're going to get some blood work done. I'm sure it'll come back like all the other times but just in case it's always better to know. I just feel releived that someone had some good advice for me and not just a bunch of silly worry or a lot of unsureness of what I ought to go about doing. And mom's suggestion just feels 'right.' I'm being silly.

Anyways so after a really nice chat, Kath and I wandered over to the dart tournament. Have you ever gone to an event and feel like you're being whisked away to a different world? Well that was this feeling entirely! They had transformed this huge room in the civic center into a huge pub-like atmosphere. The room had dartboards as far as the eye could see, lining each wall and taking up the center of the floor in areas, and in any area not containing boards had makeshift bars where you could purchase booze. Lots of booze. They had little side rooms with makeshift shops where you could buy any kind of cigarrette you could imagine and other shops that you could be dart accessories and yet other shops that made tshirts. It was weird, especially to someone who's not all that familiar with the game other than seeing dartboards in bars I've been to.

To top it all off, it seemed that I had stepped back in time as well. It was the 80's again, and I felt like a person from the future who didn't blend in very well. Everyone was dressed in tshirts and blue jeans and sneakers, half the men and women sported mullett hair-do's and everyone but everyone smoked and darnk beer. You'd see a sophisticated group here and there that one or two of the group would have a sweater and a more updated haircut and they'd be drinking a mixed drink.

It was so out of the ordinary I expected to see people in leg warmers and parachute pants next. And the music. They had music piped in somehow because I couldn't tell where it was coming from, but the music was music from my highschool days or before. All hair bands and country two step music. I'm not kidding you when I say they played Poison followed by Achey Breaky Heart. I could have sworn I was 17 again!

But after about twenty minutes of the strangeness of it all, I started getting into the games. It turns out that even though my brother and sister-in-law have only started playing darts they're very good at it. They played 25 games yesterday, winning 19 of them. I was very impressed and even more so as we watched today's events. By the end of the evening I was yelling and shouting as much as everyone else. They had to win so many games today and they'd make it to tomorrow's games which means that they'd be playing for money.

And wouldn't you know? They won the required amount of games! They're garunteed 8th place and some money for all their work. I was so happy for them and they really deserved it. It was so much fun watching them. So the plan for tomorrow is to run down to wish dad a happy birthday and spend a couple hours, and then we're coming back to see my brother and crew again. I'm going to make one of my lasagnae's when it's all over as well.

All in all it was such a fun day. The only cloud today was that I wasn't feeling well at the end of the night. I had some fries to munch on and I'm afraid I was either allergic to the ketchup or something in the grease. I've been feeling real icky. But I'm sure I'll be fine tomorrow after a little rest. So until tomorrow, I'm headed for bed.

 
Title Goes Here

The deal is that I have the morning off because I'll be working Saturday morning. The number of times that this has happened since I started 2.5 years ago is exactly two! So I slept in! Wooo! I crawled out of bed at 9:30 kissing my dream Matt Damon goodbye and stumbled into the rest of the apartment. After doing my morning routine of blinking furiously as I wait for the world to come into focus and realize I won't be able to even breathe until I go to the bathroom I stumble out to the computer so that I can discern what the world has been up to in my abscence.

It turns out that my favorite Paki, Hasan, has been living in his new adopted city for a year and now he's all mushy and thinking of cutting his hair. Please tell him not to, as this would seriously hinder my pinup poster of him over my bed if I had to change the hairstyle on it to make it look like him again. Besides, he's so yummy with all that hair! Rawr! And is it just me, or did anyone else look at the picture of him when he was 18 and notice he hasn't aged at all? He must be well preserved with beer or something.

Then I learned from visitingBevie that today is Friday! Which means I have to do my Friday Five and I also noticed Valentine's Day is just around the corner. About this time my tummy rumbled signalling it's wish for food. So I microwaved some of my left-overs from supper last night when I did my impression of a Souther Chef. Last night's menu included chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, collared greens, and sticky buns.

You think of food like that and it's just real hard to care about what you're reading. So I ate, and it was good. Then I surfed and found this guy. And I read most of his page for an hour or so giggling maddly. I'll leave you with this gem.

Every time I go to a hotel there's always this Bible in the desk drawer. I don't know who this Gideon guy is but he certainly is pretty adept at sneaking the word of God into my nightstand. Luckily I'm onto his little game. I replace those Bibles with slabs of pork or razor shavings or several plastic cups from the bathroom bonded together with bile to form an elaborate sculpture of Picasso's "Woman." Usually on a long trip, I end up with five or six Bibles and I always get a kick out of dropping them off on the doorstep of this guy who lives down the road. His last name is "Gideon" so in the long run it all makes sense. And then I make bubble pancakes with asparagus chunks.

And after reading that silliness it makes me all prepared to answer my Friday Five.

1. What's the most romantic thing you've ever done for someone else?
Oh man this one is hard. I have a ton of things I could say, but see none of the people I ever dated were really romantic and the things I'd list would fall quite sort of the normal list of romantic things. One time I flew clear across the country to have wild sex for a week. One time I did a threesome with a friend of mine because she just really liked me and I didn't feel comfy being with "just" her. One time I sent a guy a special necklace because he used to have one that meant a lot to him and he gave it back when the relationship ended, so I replaced it and he hasn't taken it off in years. Those aren't your typical romantic things, but I'm not your typical romantic girl either.

2. What are your erogenous zones?
My ears and neck especially, but really pretty much my entire body is one big errogenous zone for someone that knows how to work it.

3. How old were you the first time you had sex? Care to expound?
I'm an open book. I already wrote all about it and it's right here for your viewing pleasure. The whole damned story.

4. What's the most unusual place you've ever had sex?
Really, no place unusual for me. The most risky spot would have been on the couch in front of the bit picture window in the daylight, with the drapes open. But other than that, the floor, the bed, a motel room. That's pretty much it.

5. Do you have plans for Valentine's Day or is it just another Thursday?
Unfortuantely it's most likely just another Thursday unless I fall madly in love with someone by next week. Which although it totally could happen because I'm a love at first sight kind of person, or a love after maybe an hour with someone kind of person, it's really not likely to happen. You know, unless someone wants to come see me and convince me I'm in love with them. Its totally possible then. Any takers? Anyone? Yeah, I didn't think so.

So happy Friday everyone. The rest of my day's plans including scanning a bunch of stuff for work, working, and then possibly tonight we're going to catch a comedian before I have to come back and finally have my conversation with El Gus. When we talked the other night I barely caught him in his room and he had to go eat because FORT Nelson has no place open past 10PM at night and after working twelve hour days Gus apparently needs food. So he's going to hurry and get food before I call back tonight. So I will FINALLY catch up with him.

 
Shoulda Called In Dead

Thats how I felt this morning. Let me tell you the true pain of caffiene and tequilla. You wind up so drunk that all you want is sleep and you are so wired that it's the last thing you can do. Ouch!

Okay, here is the rest of my pain. Heh. I didn't eat last night. I got to the Mexican place where we have our margaritas and it's truly one of my favorite restaurants, but I wasn't feeling like eating. I don't argue with myself when I don't feel like eating I don't eat. It's that simple. But I did feel like drinking. I had two liters of maragritas. Ay carumba! Vaya Con dious my darling!

Hehe. I told Kath to stop and get me a burger on the way home last night and then while stopped at a stop light I groaned, "Oh don't drive so fast!" So she didn't stop for a burger but took me home and straight to bed in fear I'd ralph in her new car. I don't even remember climbing in bed. I woke up hours later in my pjs though so I'm assuming it wasn't that big of a deal. She did snip at me with comments on how I must feel this morning in referrence to my drinking.

So I got even with my anal retentive sister. I told her that I made myself a snack while drunk last night and I used some silverare, but not to worry cos I licked it off real good before I put it back. She gasped and I'm sure she came home on her lunch break and washed all the silverware. You don't tease me when I'm grouchy. Warning to my future husband, you probably shouldn't talk to me before my lunchbreak honey. I'll bite your head off. I'm mean like that.

Today I made it to work and I swear I was shaking harder than one of those little hairless chihuahuas in -40 degree windchill weather. Then to top it off I was having other issues. Bleh. I hate doctors. I don't like seeing them. They all want my blood like sick little vampires. But it's gonna be hard to avoid seeing one at the rate I'm going. Anyways I don't really wanna talk about that but I did want to share my hangover with you. So happy hangover to all of you!

 
The Doctor Is In

Just so you know, never ever take medical advice from me and also do not follow my lead. I'm dangerous I tell you. I'm sure you think I'm a rambling idiot, so I'll just prove you right and here I go. Hehehehe. Not only do I suffer from chronic nightmares, but I used to suffer from chronic headaches which at times were so bad they were migraines. Nasty stuff I tell you. Once upon a time I also thought I was in danger of having chronic bronchitis, but after moving to a different climate my respitory problems seemed to be solved. But back to the whole headache thing.

If you suffer from a lot of headaches they, meaning medical practitioners of course, have several pieces of useful advice for you. One, and this is the biggy folks, cut out all caffiene intake. No coffee, no chocolate, nothing with any caffiene in it. This also includes all over the counter headache releif tablets who's main ingredient is caffiene. And by golly I know this cardinal rule so well that I can even explain WHY in medical terms you have to quit the caffiene.

So here it is as briefly as I can explain. Your brain is filled with tiny little veins and blood vessels. Caffiene makes the blood vessels expand allowing blood to flow through much easier and faster and feels really good to your happy brain. When your blood system is depleted of a certain amount of caffiene the blood vessels shrink back down to slightly smaller than they were to begin with and the blood moves through slower. This not only doesn't feel good anymore, it downright hurts and can be one of the causes of your headaches.

So they tell you not to have caffiene. Another thing they told me was to cut off all my hair. I had waist length hair at the time and it was so thick that when I wore it in a single braid down my back it was thicker around than my wrist. BASTARDS! Hehehe. You know what? None of those things helped me. It was determined that it was probably all stress related which caused muscle spasms in my neck which in turn caused the headaches. And so I took to drinking and moved to a happier atmosphere. Just kidding. I didn't really take to drinking but I learned some ways to deal with stress and the headaches and neck pains are gone for the most part, although occasionally I still have them like anyone does and I get about one or two migraines a year. I think mostly my migraines are caused by the muscle cramps in my neck and if I can massage the muscles enough before I get completely knocked out and can crack my neck I avoid the migraine.

Last night I had one. So today I was feeling the after effects and feeling really sick. So I broke the biggest cardinal rule ever. I had a mocha, quad-carmel-iced. Now I'm not just moving, I'm floating everywhere. Things don't happen at a regular pace, they happen at warp speed. It feels amazingly cool and I am soooo going to pay for it later. So next time I do something this foolish remember the worst headache you've ever had and think twice about trying to cause it on purpose. I KNOW I am going to pay for today's foolishness. But this mocha tastes so amazingly good.

And you know what? I just found out it's margarita night. If I don't die before the evening is over I'll be sure to let you all know how much fun it was. Heh.

 
The Search Has Been Called Off

For the millions of readers who've been tracking the disappearance of Gus, he has now been located. If you are tuning into our story late, two nights ago Gus made a phone call to a long time internet friend only to be cut short by his errant calling card. He had a one minute warning and was able to gasp out several clues as to his whereabouts before the abrupt end to the conversation.

These clues included the name of a town called "Nelson, BC" the motel chain of Travelodge room number 242 and the area code, "250." Precious little else was known. But armed with the 800 number of the motelchain his desperate friend waited 24 hours before trying to track him down.

When questioned as to the reason for waiting for 24 hours before begining the pain staking search his friend replied, "Gus is a pain in the ass. I figured he'd be out drinking beer and hitting on waitresses anyways. He most likely wouldn't notice that I'd even waited a day because all his days blend into one as it is."

So when his dearest friend got in gear the search began in earnest. A call was made to the reservation center of the hotel chain and when given the name Nelson, picked up the strangely named town of Penticten. Stranger yet was two short phone calls with a woman of unknown nationality who seemed to have an Eastern European accent faintly reminiscent of Dracula, according to the friend. After two terse phone calls with little to show for it, the friend gave up.

Luckily for Gus, the friend lamented to a source of the troubles in finding a "Nelson" in Brittish Columbia. Fortunately, the source turned out to be an expert on the area and provided pertinent information to the case. It turns out that "Nelson" is actually "FORT Nelson" and there is indeed a Travelodge there.

This case was quickly winding down as all the clues were falling into place. Then tonight about 10:20PM MST, a call was made and the errant Gus was located. A reward to the source is still being established. If you would like to donate to this cause please leave comments or email.

 
Calgon Take Me Away

Yeah, so incase no one but me has noticed, I've been suffering from an exceptionally long and painful case of writer's block. It's been going on for about a month to six weeks. It's either that or I've hit middle age and I'm going crazy so I'm going to paint on a happy smile and call it writer's block because 27.5 is too young to be middle aged. Although I might have one vericose vein on my right butt-cheek. It's either that or a really ugly bruise that doesn't hurt. I'm praying it's a bruise on my curvy dimply rear end and not that other vile ugly thing that will stay there til I die.

The symptoms of my writer's block are as follows. Firstly the inability to make up my mind which includes the following list of questions: How do I want my layout to look? What do I want my domain name to be? (Which I did pick out but I haven't used it yet. Heh.) Should I start out each of my entries with a cute little title or let readers be shocked by the contents of my entry? Should I post my MSN conversations in lieu of any real material? Which details should I write about in my life, and which should I keep private? Should I stop taking those cutesy little tests, or just quit posting the cutesy little tests, or take the tests but don't post them? (Those cutesy little tests aren't accurate in my case anyways since I never answer them the same two times in a row.) Should I put my naked ass on the page or just my boobies? (Okay I was just checking to see if anyone was reading this. I'm not putting up nude pictures again.)

Other symptoms include me boring the hell out of myself, falling asleep and winding up with that embarrassing 'keyboard face'. The unconditional fear of posting the same story more than once because I'm too lazy to go through my own archives. I find I pay the utmost of attention to every trip I make to the store incase it's blog worthy. Now that is truly sad. But then again it's my way of getting revenge on people for being stupid. Isn't that right Mrs. Dracula? One of my latest fears is that if I put up links to blogs that I truly admire and love, what if the person who writes the blog sees my blog and laughs? I would die of shame and embarrassment. Okay not really, and the truth is all the people I've been stalking following who've in turn checked out my site have been incredibly gracious and a few have started stalking following me in return. Now that is flattery baby.

Honestly, I hope this writer's block thing ends soon. Because my latest thoughts are that I'll be returning to work at the video store again very soon. I've visited there several times recently and while it's been amusing to say the least I haven't been talking about it much. I'm not sure I want anyone else to influence my decision on whether or not to go back. But I will admit that it gives me the giggles when I walk in the video store and I'm the only customer that always gets greeted by every single cashier in the place. It's like walking into a McDonald's and getting a standing ovation or something. It's also funny when I ask everyone what movie I should rent and they gasp and bow their heads and answer that they just don't know. But then they'll giggle at me and say things like, "Remember when you told me I had to see *insert movie name here*? Well I did and you're right I LOVED it!" Or they'll say "Mr. or Ms. CUSTOMER was asking about you the other day."

It just makes me feel wanted. I like that. I like that a lot. Plus it helps that I'm bored out of my mind at my other job right now because it's so slow. I work really hard to do a good job there, but it's frustrating to not have work to do. But admittedly Bill has been the most fun lately. I love it when we get along like this because I learn so much during these periods. He's amazingly smart and he can be really funny too, so I can't help but enjoy him very much.

So soon as my last greatest plan that I'm refusing to discuss is over with, the decision about the video store will be made. Maybe that's when the writer's block will end too, who knows.

 
APB on Gus

So I didn't attempt to call him last night, but I tried to play detective and call him back tonight. After several calls, a wasted phone card and no success I give you my conversation with Bev instead. And I am not kidding one little bit about the woman I talked with either. Read on.

Stormy Skye says: Okay I'm ready to bust a cap on someone.
Bev says: why?
Stormy Skye says: i'm trying to find gus and i can't AND i just talked to freaking mrs dracula
Bev says: mmmkai *L*
Stormy Skye says: okay...Gus gives me the 800 number for travelodge...says he's staying there in nelson BC and there isn't a travelodge in nelson...there's one in penticton and the bitch mrs dracula says not only is it NOT Nelson because the town is freaking penticton but there isn't a rm 242 which is the number gus gave and of course he's not registered there..oh and get this on the travelodge website penticton is 0 miles from nelson
Bev says: lol swift
Stormy Skye says:no shit...i'm so pissed cos i didn't want to call him last night and now even though i feel should call i can't
Bev says: hmm
Stormy Skye says:and there isn't even a 142 or anything because they only have 36 suites so i don't know what to do
Bev says: There must be a good excuse for this. *L*
Stormy Skye says:well it doesn't really matter...he'll have to get his act together and call me back
Bev says: I guess so..
Stormy Skye says:i don't even SEE Nelson on the map
Bev says: ive never heard of it.
Stormy Skye says: he always stays there so i don't know...
Bev says: weird.
Stormy Skye says:and i can't exactly go "do you have a seismic crew there" to mrs dracula because i'm afraid she'd suck out my will to live over the phone
Bev says: do it anyway..
Stormy Skye says:every time i call it costs me a dollar...i'm wasting my calling card...and bitch..er mrs dracula hung up on me not once but twice
Bev says: bitch her out.
Stormy Skye says: she barely speaks anything but bohemian suck your blood...i'm serious..she answers the phone "GUTE eeeevinning, dravalaudge"
Bev says: lmfao
Stormy Skye says: she answers one question...and ONLY one question and hangs up immediately...if your question isn't a decent one she'll hang up before she answers it IE:if you ask for room 242 and there are only 36 rooms
Bev says: So ask for someone you can have decent conversation with *L*.. or ask for the manger.
Stormy Skye says: call back and ask if Mr. Russ ****** is registered ...mrs dracula:"NO YOU AFF WRONG OTTLE"...me: "is this the travelodge in Nelson?"...mrs dracula-"NO PENICKTIN!!"...me: "where?" "PENICTIEN!!!!!!"... dial tone...
Bev says: niccce
Stormy Skye says: besides, do you know ANYTHING about hotels with only 36 rooms? there is NOT a chance in hell there's a manager there at 8:30PM lol
Bev says: I dont know anything, actually *L*
Stormy Skye says: yeah well i used to work front desk at a place...so i do...there's NO chance that there'd be anyone there but her at this time of night
Bev says: wait till till tomorrow then.
Stormy Skye says:lol she probably just works the night shift...because she's not allowed into the sunlight
Bev says: or near people.
Stormy Skye says: i wonder how many people die there every night in their sleep from bloodloss
Bev says: you're silly.
Stormy Skye says: i am NOT silly...vampires creep me out man

 
From Sweetest Slumber Wakes

I'd laid down and read for a little while from one of my new books when I gave up. I turned off the light and crawled beneath my big fluffy comforter enjoying the coolness of the cotton sheet as it slipped along the bare skin of my legs. Before I knew it I was sound asleep nestled within the warm cocoon of my blankets and pillows. I never heard the phone, instead it was Kath's voice.

"Bren it's Gus."

I stumbled out to the phone as he's the only one allowed to wake me up day or night for no apparent reason. It's been like this for about six years. Gus doesn't follow time schedules or normal rules. He's the only one I ever allow to do this to me. It's funny because I never know when he'll call or what he'll have to say. It always amuses me though and I never fail to laugh or completely enjoy the calls.

Even when they're five minutes long and he runs out of time on his calling card and all he remembers is his room number and the 800 number for reservations at the place he's at.

So, once more I'm going to take my sleepy self back to bed as I can't find a calling card because Kath has freaking cleaned my space again. No one ever sympathizes with me when I explain or lament this fact. Bev tries to reason that cleanliness is good in a work area. No one understands my anguish that everything is now misplaced or that there was order in my disorder. Perhaps Gus will try to call again tomorrow. Or maybe I'll get phone calls from the girl that stole his phone. Heh.

Off to dream.

 
Part I

So this is a three part entry. So settle into your computer chair and maybe make sure you're extra comfortable and that you have a beverage. If it's dark, you might want a light on because I have a nightmare to get out as well as my usual stuff. Not a real thriller, but still creepy. And then I'm going to end with why you might not see as many entries here for awhile.

Yesterday I went in for my over-haul and I'm gorgeous. My coppery red hair was trimmed into gorgeous silky curls that Ducine insisted on making bush all over the place yesterday. I had rock-star hair and you could tell I knew it because I had this extra little bit of attitude in my walk. My eyebrows were sculpted into two perfectly molded arches over my eyes. Ducine always is slightly amazed at the difference when she's finished and typically can't help but comment on the color of my eyes. Yesterday she described them as a shade between summer grass and sunshine. In reality I think they're a very plain olive green, but at times they have these topaz gold lights in them that make them glitter. Very unnoticable behind my lesbian-Velma glasses. Yet apparently some people do notice, especially since my defined brows seem to make people look a little longer than normal. It's nice though when people stare at your eyes instead of your breasts.

Ducine finished my repair work with my perfect manicure, complete with icy pink polish. When I first started getting my nails done she'd oh-so-subtley remark about the "old lady" colored polish that people usually pick out. Which I very quickly noticed to be true because 99% of women in this town that get manicures pick these dull pinks or browns or nude colors. It makes me wonder why they spend money to make their nails look beautiful when they turn around and paint them invisible colors like that. In her own way Ducine was only encouraging me to pick something splashier or different, or as she often says, "To make a statement." I always pick rich shades, or shades so beautifully pure that it's shocking, or if I'm feeling subtle I pick such soft beautiful colors that they're anything but invivisble such as my icy pink.

So I walked out of there yesterday looking fantastic. I also walked out with a new addiction. When I was a little girl I tagged after my father constantly. He'd take me with him to coffee with the other guys and the waitresses always thought it was adorable that a six year old would drink black coffee to fit in with the men. Once in awhile the other adult men would order cream and try to temp me with it or they'd make a big deal of watering down or sugaring their coffee. Perhaps it was out of concern for me as I tried to be tough, but much to their amusement I always drank it black, and they'd chuckle as the waitresses would try to warn me it was extra strong that day. I quit drinking coffee in my teen years because I developed chronic headaches. The first few remedies mentioned when it comes time to cure constant headaches is cutting out caffiene and to cut off long hair if that's what you've got. By my sophmore year in college I never had caffiene and I no longer had my long hair.

Which I've since taken up the caffiene habbit again, headaches aren't as much of a problem now that I have other ways of dealing with stress and I'm getting long hair again. So my new addiction (you were wondering if there was a point to all this weren't you?) is coffee. Not any coffee mind you, but coffee house coffee. I went and picked Ducine up one of her favorites yesterday and got one for myself as well. Quad, carmel, iced. Which is a carmel mocha with four shots in it and then iced. It's cool, refreshing and will make anyone bounce off the walls. Probably a bit much for me to try for my first one, but I went ahead and got a second one for msyelf anyways. I'm in love with them.

 
Part II

Kath and I picked up a couple of movies and had a quiet evening. It was very nice and I crashed early after my day of beautification. You wouldn't have thought I'd be exhausted, yet I most certainly was. I plan on detailing my visits back at the video store in the next few days, but not yet as I'm still turning a couple of things over in my mind first. So as I said I went to sleep. It was a restless sleep to say the least and I was stiff and sore, yet exhausted so I really couldn't wake up. The sleep gave way to nightmares sometime early this morning as it was 3:30 when I got up and got myself a drink of water a couple of asprin and then crawled back between the crisp black sheets of my bed.

I tossed and turned and finally started dreaming. It was something about rescuing these miniature kittens. They looked just like regular kittens only it was nearly as if they were less than half the size of normal kittens and much more well developed than even new born kittens because their eyes were open and they could crawl all over me. I'd rescued maybe ten of them myself, and then I demanded my father go and get the rest for me to take care of until I could find homes for them.

But he and my step father went together. Which is weird because I don't have a step father. Yet in the dream I knew that that was who this other man was. They took this old pickup truck of my dads which I haven't seen this truck since I was about ten. It's really odd how you remember things in your dreams. They took off in the pickup and before long my mother came and interrupted my play with the mini-kittens and said that something had gone really wrong and now the rest of my family had gone to try to rescue my two dads. I felt incredibly guilty and it was suggested by my mom that I should go and try to save my family. I made the excuse that I had to take care of the animals and she got disgusted with me and in turn went after everyone.

I had the radio on to listen to the news, and I heard on the radio that my whole family was presumed dead. That in an apparent attempt to rescue some animals that everyone had been trapped inside this building that burnt down. The man on the air said that "IF" there was anyone left alive there was no way for anyone to get to them. Tears streamed down my face at this point because I had demanded that everyone else help me with the rescue and I basically guilted my dad into it. I felt so awful so I wrapped the kittens up to be warm and left food for them and ran outside to get a vehicle so I could go to the burning building myself.

The only vehicle left me was my dad's semi. Of course there was no trailer on it, just the semi itself. So I steeled myself and opened the door and lifted myself up and into the huge vehicle. I can't even drive a stick, and I felt overwhelmed at the thought of driving this semi but I knew the basics, and I managed to get it to where the building was burning. Everyone there was crying and pointing at me accusingly. The crowd pushed me closer and closer to the building, and eventually shoved me inside and as I got inside I looked out through the flames and there was my whole family standing outside talking to each other. They saw me somehow and cried out my name and I was mad because I was trapped and it was so hot and suffocating. Instead of trying to escape though I just walked deeper and deeper into the building because I was looking for the kittens again. I eventually found them and put them in my pockets of my jacket. They were crawling all over me and their little claws pricked at my skin and I just kept getting hotter and hotter until I could barely breathe. I saw a door to the outside and my grandmother was standing there and told me I couldn't come out this way.

It was very weird because I asked why not, and she said because I wasn't dead yet. Which made sense, because she was. At this point I was so startled I woke up. But for the first few minutes I still had the sensations of little tiny kittens with sharp claws crawling all over me. It wasn't that scarey, but was definitely bizzarre.

 
Part III

So this morning I woke up early for a Sunday. Crawled out of bed by 8am. Came out and settled in my comfy chair and soon heard Kath come out as well. We watched our other movie, then took turns showering, so we could be seen in public. I was lazy and just piled my damp hair up on my head and we went and returned the movies and I went to this store that I haven't been to before. A book store. Borders is a store I'd never head of until we got a huge one here in town. I've wanted to go there for quite some time but never really took the time. It's a lot like Barnes and Noble and other places such as that. I indulged in another of my carmel mocha's, although only a triple and hot versus iced.

I flirted with the guy at the information counter and he joked with me how he was petitioning to make cowboys the eighth wonder of the world. I raised one of my perfect eyebrows and grinned impishly as a chunk of coppery gold curls fell over my right eye and he was smitten. He explained to me why as we both watched a silly cowboy browsing in vain through the cooking section for the "Anarchist's Cookbook." We both smiled at each other rolling our eyes at the silliness of people in general when I was interrupted by the lady who'd run off to answer my question. I peeked at him and flashed my impish grin one more time before running off to stare lovingly at the set of books she'd found for me.

All in all I spent $50 in books. I really shouldn't have done that just yet, but as we figured my tax return and I did a good thing by paying in too much money, I should get a nice amount back. What's more I could get it as quickly as a week so I felt justified in spending the money. However I now have five books to curl up with on my soft bed covered in even softer bedding and my ten pillows. So today was a good day, but you may not see much of me. I get caught up in a book and I've been meaning to go back to just reading for quite some time. I find reading really improves my ability to tell stories, even when they're just recountings of my day. I like telling a good story almost as I like reading one. So if you don't see me, don't miss me too much. I'll be back shortly.

Ahem, and I really will get my domain running soon. I'm just procrastinating. But I'm so lovable I'm sure I'll be forgiven. I know this because Bev tells me all the time how everyone loves me. The funny thing is that my sister always scoffs at this, but at Borders today the lady that rang me through said almost the same thing. Causing Kath to nearly choke. I smiled my sweetest at the lady as she teased me about my purchases and teased my sister even more for picking out yet another Princess Diana book. I told her that I couldn't really complain about Kath's choice as I was spending way too much money myself and the woman to my shock said, "But that's okay because everyone loves you!" I giggled in delight as my sister growled at the woman denying the possiblity of everyone loving me. I just winked and made my way to the car with a silly smile of my face.

 
So I really do mean to get my domain up and running this weekend. Honest. I'm trying to decide whether or not to do a splash page or not. I'm thinking not because in general I don't like them overly much. I like to get right to the heart of the matter and read the juice immediately. I'm greedy. I'm a greedy greedy woman. Heh.

I'm getting ready to go get my tune up first though. I'm going in with only one big ass eyebrow which I'm hopping can be turned into two and an afro which I can only hope looks humanly normal when I leave. I'm also going in with yet another bum nail, which I'll wave accusingly under Ducine's nose like it's her fault it isn't the perfectly squared masterpiece that she created two weeks ago. Which I'm not sure it isn't. It's everyone's fault but mine and that's for damn sure. I never use my nails as tools. Ever. Hehe I'm so glad my nose doesn't grow when I lie. The truth is I smashed my finger yesterday and the nail couldn't possibly survive all that pressure. You should all just be really glad I don't have a digital camera to show you my ugliness in all of it's glory.

I want to go see a movie too. But I don't know what to go see. Any suggestions? But anyways I thought I'd leave you with some laughter. Laughter is always the best way to start off a weekend right.

Finally, I've found a REAL friend when I need advice on what to wear. He's sincere and positive in every single way. I no longer have to rely on my favorite gay men online for that special advice.

Not only that, soon as I find a date, I can be seen in public with him because I'll have that special reassurance. Because I've learned to dance. Footloose ain't got nothing on me baby!

 
So some days this is a blog, and some days this is a diary because I am the woman who can never make up her mind. I shouldn't admit that, but I don't mind sharing this little secret with anyone who might peek at this. I think of it as the little price I pay for people who are curious enough to read this. Today I thought since I had put in so much blog stuff (use your imagination here) I would put in something else.

I used to live with Michelle. Michelle was ...is bisexual, although her admitted preference is women. We were best friends. She very definitely had romantic intentions towards me. And one night, we were very romantic, with our next door neighbor. There was another time that we could have been romantic with another guy, but once was enough for me and I was already involved with a man I shouldn't have been with. What I haven't mentioned before was Nicole.

Michelle had a thing for Nicole. Nicole's girlfriend was in prison for being caught with pot or selling pot or something like that. Nicole was about as butch as you could get. She had this dark hair that was shaved in the back and kept all of it on top in a pony tail. She wore lose clothes and boxers. She smoked and did drugs as well, and she was on parole. Michelle was madly in love with her, and I think that if Nicole had been available that perhaps Michelle wouldn't have been so distracted by me. Maybe she would have been. I'm not sure.

But one day Nicole and I nearly drove Michelle over the edge, and to this day I know Michelle wonders if anything happened between Nicole and I. To tell the truth, if Nicole had put the moves on me, or asked me, I think something might have happened. I've never admitted this before. I can't say what it is, because normally I'm not that attracted to women and when I am, I really like beautiful feminine women and Nicole was definitely not of this type. But I loved her smile, she had these perfect teeth and this really distracting piercing on her lip and her tongue and I was, curious. Nicole often admitted she preferred girls who'd never been with girls before and she winked at me.

So Nicole and I spent all afternoon together. We talked and talked while Chelle was at work. We played on the computer and listened to music. She smoked some pot and offered me some. She knew I'd never tried it before. She laughed as I tried it. I got paranoid, but other than that I felt nothing really. And I knew that if there had been more time alone, she might have been more tempted. I definitely wanted to kiss her. She just had a beautiful mouth and I knew from experience that girls are great kissers and there was something about her that was...knowing.

But nothing happened. Nicole later admitted to me privately as I was moving away that there were several times she'd nearly approached me. She said that Michelle had even told her she was sure that if it were the three of us that I would have consented. I was surprised by this and then she asked me, "Would you have?" I smiled slowly and said that I might have.

"What if it had been just me," she whispered.

I smiled.

I never gave her any other answer but my smile. She looked at me for a long moment and just smiled back and told me goodbye.

 
Pischina rules for this quiz.

Which
Carbonated Beverage Are You?

I know I've heard that old adage "You are what you eat." But who knew it was true of what you drink too?

Anyways I'm so evil today. I'm taking time from work to work at home. I should have done all this work so very long ago, but no, I kept putting it off. Heh. Anyways so here shortly I'm going to have to actually DO all that work. It isn't difficult or anything at all. But most likely it will end the honeymoon that Bill and I've been on. Which will be brought to a bloody end when he yells at me for not telling him how much computer work had to be done. I don't know why I seem to have this perverse pleasure from keeping him in the dark. It's just that it's so easy to say "Everything's fine!" when he asks what all's happening.

Maybe secretly, without my own knowledge, I just enjoy having him yell at me. That must be it. Because I never change. I don't like arguing with him because he's smarter than me, not to mention a hundred years older than me. I was taught to never argue with your elders. I wouldn't want to upset him and have him break a hip or self combust. That would be bad. And really and truly I think he's the most wonderful guy and I've learned a lot from him.

So I'm just taking half an hour here and scanning a couple of things. That's all. I won't go to hell for half an hour will I? After all, if all my sins were forgiven when I was baptized, and trust me I'd committed a whole bunch of the seriously bad ones at this time. Can anyone say adultery? Then this shouldn't do me in. Procrastination isn't a bad bad thing allll the time.

Anyways it'll help my afternoon go faster. Perhaps I'll finally break down and finish writing code for the new domain. I got it all designed finally. It should be reminiscent of my favorite layout last summer. I know I just did this design. Er BEV just did this design, but I didn't do enough work with this one so I'm feeling guilty like I didn't design it myself. Even though the general idea of it was mine, I felt foolish putting up another's design. Even though it was made with love by my favorite Bev, and even though it's very very pretty, it just doesn't feel right.

 
My Friday Five via Smattering.

1. Have you ever had braces? Any other teeth trauma?
Actually I had my wisdom teeth removed, as well as one tooth in the very front of my mouth. I have a little mouth and I just didn't have room for all my teeth. You'd never know by looking that I'm missing any.

2. Ever broken any bones?
Never. But I've sprained nearly everything.

3. Ever had stitches?
I've needed them before but the injury was in a place that couldn't be stitched.

4. What are the stories behind some of your [physical] scars?
Along the inside of my knee I have about a three inch scar from a barbed wire fence from when I went hunting with my dad when I was about five or six. By the time my folks found out that I had been injured it was nearly healed. Extra crease along the inside of my hand was from trying to carry nine glass ashtrays across a wet dining room floor at a job during high school. Because the laceration was along the inside joint of my fingers it couldn't be stitched and now it just looks like an extra crease in my hand instead of a scar. I have a tiny scar on my chin from 'rescuing' a stray cat and then having my dog run around the corner and scare the bejesus out of the cat when I was about 7. From the same incident I have a scar above my left breast about an inch long. It was one scared cat.

5. How do you plan to spend your weekend?
I have the weekend off. I have no plans. I know what I should do, but will I? Most likely not.

I'm a boring person. Well it seems that way. If any of you can think of anything you'd like to ask me I'd be more than happy to answer. I know there must be plenty of interesting funny things to write about it's just that at the moment I can't think of any. Other wise I'm just going to sleep the weekend away and hope I feel better.

Oh and tomorrow I have a 'date' with Ducine. I'm going to have her overhaul my engine. Well not really, she's going to give me a desperately needed manicure, haircut and cure my unibrow. I have to talk to her about how to solve my hair color problem too. I've decided that as much fun as it's been to be a screaming redhead for the last year I now have to get back to blonde. The reason being is that when I fixed my hair the other day I noticed that I don't have just a few stray strands of grey hair any more. I have a huge chunk along my left temple that has turned completely white. So to avoid something that happened to my mother when I was really young, I'm going to go back to blond. Mom once tried to color her silver hair red and wound up with bright shining pink hair. We've never let her forget. Teehee.