Like father, like son, why won't the American people listen to me? Sheesh, I didn't want to judge Georgy-boy until I saw him in action, but, alas, I have. Ah, crap. What are we trying to do? I can see them in the white house now, "hmmm, I'm bored, lets go and drop a few bombs in the area where we shouldn't in, oh, ah, hell, why not, Iraq! We'll still have a few months to get rid of their NUCLEAR WEAPONS." I'm not quite sure if our white house staff really understand the fact that being dead is really quiet permanent. Not to mention that if they kill off half the country they won't get re-elected, oh, wait, they will! AHHHHH, you have no idea how much I hate American logic. Lets look at what the little guy has done so far.
1. The-Lets-Screw-America's-Poor-Tax. This is my personal favorite. Why all the nice upper-class people romp around in their new Lexis', the, well, rest of the world gets to buy a new muffler for their nice old Ford that sits in their lawn with four other pick up trucks. I know this really doesn't describe all of America, but when you live in Vermont you kind of get certain stereotypes about, well, people in general. All of those trailers with satellites bigger than the actual home that you see on TV, they really are the norm in this side of the county. Not all of the population, but certainly enough for it to be truly depressing.
2. The-Lets-Solve-The-Energy-"Crisis"-By-Taking-Out-More-Of-Our-Natural-Habitats-Bill. Okay, does anyone else find it a tad bit ironic that Bush suggests opening up MORE oil reserves to help with the oil PROBLEM? Geeze people, lets think about this. If we're running out of oil, a non-reusable resource, how much sense does it make to solve the problem by making another nice big oil hole? I say the term "solve" lightly. I don't mean to demean our fine president, wait, yes I do, but please, all the man is doing is giving the Comedy channel a nice boost of funds.
Here's some things that Bush has said. (These are worst than the lines I hear in the halls of school, does this say anything?)
"Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning?" Yep, I agree, that isn't asked a whole lot.
"One of the great things about books is that sometimes there are some fantastic pictures." Yes Bush, pictures, the ones with fairies and leprechauns that dance in the pretty circle of lots and lots of illegal substances, crack head.
"It's going to require numerous IRA agents." Oh yeah, so they can sing naked in a Celtic frenzy while singing "death to the Prostitutes!" (Prostitutes, Protestants, I can never keep those religions straight.)
"It's clearly a budget, it's got a lot of numbers in it." Go! You mathematician you.
"I think we agree, the past is over." No, George, the democrats have a different position on that one.
"If affirmative action means what I just described, what I'm for, then I'm for it." Hmmm, Bushy Boy, you've got such a stimulating intellect I can hardly tell you, but when I do, I'll tell you, cause that's what I'll do,
"I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family." Yeah, I really hate that. Havin' a good day until mom won't let you smear peanut butter over her crustily luscious legs. Ah, shucks.
"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." And where I cry, and cry, and cry.
"I know the human being and the fish can coexist peacefully." Just like the Chinese and the Amish.
"If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign." Yah, stupid principles, they just get in your way.
"Dick Cheney and I do not want this nation to be in recession. We want anybody who can find work to be able to find work." Woohooo, then maybe they can find some more work so the people can work after they found the work that they were able to find. See, I could be president.
"There's a huge trust. I see it all the time when people come up to me and say, 'I don't want you to let me down again.'" It's a comforting thought that this is the leader of the free world. Yes, oh yes it is.
In light of everything I have learned about Bush, I can only say one thing.