Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely

*~* Chapter 5: Let Go *~*

AJ and Vykki came up from under the covers of her bed gasping for air.  "Oh my God, AJ what have we done."  Vykki said still trying to catch her breath.  "Uh, um I don't know." AJ stammered still trying to catch his.  Vykki found her clothes at the side of the bed and quickly slipped them on.  "AJ I think you should leave." She said quietly.  "I think we should just forget about all this."  AJ put on his boxers, which were hanging from the bedpost and put them on.  "I think you're right.  It never happened." By this time, AJ had on his pants and shoes.  

"Where's my shirt?"

"Um, in the kitchen." Vykki sniffled.  

"What's wrong?" AJ asked noticing the tears running down her cheeks.  

"I don't believe we did this AJ.  I slept with my sister's boyfriend.  I'm such a whore! She's never do this to me." Vykki yelled dropping to her knees, burying her face in her hands and crying loudly.

AJ could feel tears in his eyes too.  "It was an accident Vykki.  It just happened because we're both very vulnerable right now.  And you couldn't feel half as bad as I do."

"Why do you say that?" Vykki replied in a semi sarcastic tone

"Nikki is dead because of me.  That night when she went to celebrate with her friends, she met some guy and he drugged her and raped her.  Brought her back here and I walked in on them.  And being me, I thought she was cheating on me and we got in a huge fight.  Then I left and went home and she followed me.  We fought some more and I told her I didn't want to see her again.  And when she left a car hit her."

"You killed my sister!" Vykki growled getting off the floor.  "AJ, I really think you should leave.  And I don't ever want to see you again.  You and I both know she'd never do something like that to you.  And this is how you repay her!"

"You were in too Vyktoria, it takes two to tango sweetheart!"

"I must have been crazy to think I ever liked you Alexander! Now get the hell out of my house!"

"My pleasure!  And I must have been crazy to think I ever liked you.  You're just a cheap knock off of you're sister!"  At that, AJ grabbed his jacket and walked out of Vykki's apartment.

"Oh yeah!" Vykki screamed after AJ as he walked down the hallway.  "You know for a Backstreet Boy you're far from larger that life!" Vykki slammed the door.

*~*

"Nikki! I'm so sorry.  I never meant to do what I did.  I feel so bad."  AJ yelled out.  

Nikki was at the foot of his bed, just as always.  With he white dress and 100 watt smile.  

"AJ I'm not mad at you." She began.  "I know what happened, and believe it or not, you a Vykki need each other right now.  It wasn't you're fault that I'm dead, it was just my time to go.  I'm just glad that I got to experience true love before I died.  You gave that to me AJ, and dead or not I know I will always have your love.  And you will always have mine.  But AJ you need to let me go.  If you don't you will feel guilty and have these dreams for the rest of your life.  AJ I'm not on earth anymore, but you are and you have to live for life because trust me, you're not leaving for a long time.  Don't worry about it, one day you'll be here with Brandon and me.  Because we're soul mates.  I love you AJ and never forget that, but Vykki has feelings for you too.  And you have feelings for her.  And you two have to be together, or I'll never get my wings." She laughed.  "But anyway, I just want to see you happy Alexander James McLean, because you had me happy.  Always and Forever AJ, Always and Forever."

*~*

AJ woke up, with his heart racing as always.  Those last word echoed through his mind.  "Always and Forever", that was the name of the new album.  He sat in his bed for a while thinking about his dream.  He knew exactly what he had to do.  He got out of bed, threw on some clothes and ran downstairs.  He flung open the door to find Vykki, standing at the doorstep, soaking wet from the rain.

"Vykki, what are you doing here?"

"AJ we gotta talk." Vykki sighed.  Tears began to trickle down her cheeks.

"Yeah we do." AJ agreed as he closed the door behind him.  He was about to talk but Vykki cut him off.

"AJ tonight I had this dream.  It was Nikki, telling me that we should be together."

"I had a dream like that too." AJ replied. "In fact, I was going to your house to tell you about it."

"What are we going to do?  I still feel guilty about what we did."

"I know." AJ replied.  I do too, but this is what she wants.  I think it's kind of uncanny that we had the same dream at the same time, but maybe that is showing us that it wasn't just a dream."

AJ walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her. She wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face into his chest.  AJ looked out the window, noticing that the rain had stopped and the sun was raising.  

"Well check it out.  She's happy." AJ commented.  

"Yeah, I guess so." Vykki replied

Chapter Six
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