Hey Aaron
Story by Anonymous

~~*Chapter Seven- June 2000*~~

June 3, 2000 Saturday

Hey Aaron,
    Bri's still mad at me. I tried talking to him, but he always turned away. I'm really depressed now. I feel like I'm losing my best friend, my older brother. Bri's a part of me. I don't want to lose that. I wanted to say something like that to him, but I ended up getting at him and calling him an asshole. Bri was really hurt by that. I didn't want to hurt him. I don't want him to be mad at me. Why is this happening? We're best friends! We shouldn't fight like this. I wish Howie would step in. He's a good peacemaker. But he's not. Howie, AJ, and Kev are staying out of our disagreement. I dunno why. I can't handle it anymore! I wish that we could just make up and be friends again. Please, Lord, help me. I don't wanna lose Bri. I don't wanna lose our friendship, God. Please, please, help.

I don't think Bri wants me as a friend anymore. I heard him talking with Kev about me. He said that I was a sour mouth loser with no life. He said that I didn't care about him at all and that I was a selfish little jerk. Kevin was like, "You don't mean that." Brian answered firmly, "Yes I do. Either he goes, or I go." I was surprised. We weren't THAT mad at each other! Or were we? I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't stay to listen to the rest of their conversation. I ran to my room and bawled. This wasn't fair. Bri is...WAS my friend. God, I told you I didn't want to lose him! What made me deserve this? God, what did I do? It's not God's fault...it's my fault. It's my damn fault. I just wanna kill myself. I wish I hadn't said anything like that. Bri's a better person than me, God. When he dies, send him to heaven please. He deserves it. He's a good person.

Nick

June 5, 2000, Monday

Hey Aaron,
    We're here in the Bahamas to write music for our new album. I know Bri's still furious with me. I hate myself. Marit couldn't come with me; she was busy with her friend, and bandmate, Marion Raven (they're singers called M2M). It seems like everyone's mad at me. Howie shouts at me constantly, especially when we're writing music, AJ snaps at me a WHOLE lot, and Kevin is angry at me cause of what Bri said. Maybe if I quit everyone will be happy. But I don't want to. The Backstreet Boys are a part of me. It's what brings me to music. I love my bandmates, it's just that they're mad at me, well, except Brian, he HATES me. I know it.

Kev just came in. He said that AJ, Howie and him weren't mad at me; they were just worried about Bri and me. I said that's alright...he deserves to be mad at me. I was a jerk. Kevin gave me and hug and said, "Everything's gonna be alright. Just wait. Bri doesn't hate ya." I said, "Thanks Kev." He just gave me a small smile and left the room. At least they weren't mad at me. But I'm not sure about Bri not hating me. I could just see his anger and hate toward me. I just wanna cry. I don't wanna lose him.

Nick

Chapter Eight
Back to this story index
Back to Hosted Stories