Ranma 1/2: The Magical Mystery Hibiki Tour

by Jaelle and Orla

***

The characters in this story are the property of Rumiko
Takahashi-sama. We prostrate ourselves at her feet and beg her
forgiveness for our temerity in using these characters. We're
not worthy! We're not worthy!

The other characters are copyright to Yukie Nasu and Pioneer
LDC.

C & C is welcome (although we don't like flames!). You can
contact us at either: ladyorla@yahoo.com or jaelle@ihug.co.nz

For more of our fanfiction visit our site 'Insane Musings'at:
http://homepages.ihug.co.nz/~jaelle/Jaelle_Orla.htm

***

This story occurs four years after Ranma 1/2 volume 38.

***

Part 21

***

"Ukyou!" Akane called. "Ukyou wait!" she ran after the
departing woman. "UKYOU KUONJI!!!"

"SHUT UP!" Ukyou rounded on her. "Just leave me alone!"

"No," said Akane. "I won't. At least not until you let
me get in a few words."

Ukyou glared at her with a mutinous expression. "As long
as you're QUICK."

Akane took a deep breath and martialed her thoughts.
"I know you're angry right now, but before you go and do
something irrevocable would you please just think it
through? You're walking out on a good thing here. Ryoga
_loves_ you."

"Ryoga is a JACKASS!" snarled Ukyou.

Akane thought about it, "Well maybe he is. Nobody's ever
claimed he's the brightest spark in the works. But he's
honest, hardworking, loyal, and very very dedicated to you.
And right now he's really upset because of what you did
to him. You may not realise this Ukyou, but right now you
have more power to hurt him than Kazeten, Ranma or anyone
else could ever have. Because unlike them, he actually
cares about what you think of him." Akane paused.

"Well I don't care!" There was an edge of doubt in Ukyou's
voice, which gave Akane the courage to persist.

"Really? Then why were you trying to protect him?"

"Huh," said Ukyou. "Much good it did me."

"Well," said Akane, "You did go a bit too far. You have
to understand, Ryoga's a martial artist - accepting
challenges and fighting is not just what he does, it's
what he _is_." She drew a deep breath. "And I hate to
say it, but you shouldn't have butted in on his man to
man fight, that's just not something you do. You just
have to trust Ryoga. He'll come back, he's very good about
keeping his word."

"I'm SICK of hearing about how WONDERFUL Ryoga is." Ukyou
spat, her temper flaring again. "YOU don't know the half
of it. Were you aware for example, that your loyal, honest
and dedicated Ryoga was also P-chan???"

"Yeah. So what?"

Ukyou stared at her. This was not the reaction she'd been
expecting. "You... you _knew_???!!!"

Akane shrugged, "Oh come on Ukyou, I'm not _completely_
stupid. I've known since just after the aborted wedding."

"And you didn't SAY anything about it? You didn't HATE
him? You weren't MAD?"

"Well of course I was mad," said Akane. "Who wouldn't be?
But Ryoga was away, lost again, and by the time he came
back I'd calmed down and realised that yeah, I could tell
him I knew and kill him for everything that happened
because of it... or I could get over it and keep a very
valuable friend."

Ukyou gaped at her. "What?"

"I decided that friendship was more important than the
fleeting, VERY fleeting joy of revenge." said Akane.

Robbed of a devastated Akane, Ukyou could do nothing
but storm off. Akane watched her go, and hoped that her
words had made a difference.

***

Cautiously Ranma approached Ryoga who was seated on the
driveway, his head buried in his hands. Depression rolled
off him in waves.

Ranma cleared his throat. "Uh... Ryoga?"

Ryoga looked up and glared balefully at him. "What is it
Saotome?"

Ranma took in Ryoga's empty eyes and strained face. *This
is not good.* He sat down beside Ryoga.

"I know what happened." he said.

Ryoga grimaced. "Great, just great. More people are witness
to my humiliation as my life collapses around me." He threw
back his head. "Why?" he howled to the sky. "Why are the
Gods punishing _me_!"

"She was wrong." Ranma said, ignoring this outburst.

Ryoga stared at him. "I thought you would defend her." he
murmured.

Ranma fiddled with his pigtail. "Well, in this case... well,
no, not exactly." he struggled to say his piece. "Ukyou, she,
well, I guess she panicked."

"And that's a good excuse for what she did?!" Ryoga shook
his head. "She didn't believe in me. Akane always believed
in me."

"Yeah, well, Ukyou's _not_ Akane." Ranma's voice was firm.
"Ya gotta get that straight, man. They're different women
and they react to things in different ways." Ranma licked
his lips. This whole talk was _hard_. "Y'see, Ucchan is a
bit... insecure, because of what Oyaji... Oyaji and _me_
did, She gets a bit... possessive about things and people.
She likes to take care of people, and she's so used to
being on her own that she tries to... well, she tries to
control people." Ranma took a deep breath, this had gotta
be the longest speech he'd ever made. "She saw what Kazeten
did and lost it, I guess, so..."

"She lied to me." Ryoga interrupted. Then he paused.
"Insecure?" he asked. "Are you sure? Ukyou always struck me
as very... in control."

"She wouldn't have been chasing after me for so long even
when she knew how I felt about Akane if she wasn't." Ranma
pointed out.

"Hmmm..."

Ranma tentatively put a hand on Ryoga's shoulder. "Yes, she
lied. But do you really want to lose her forever because she
made one mistake?"

Ryoga remained silent.

Ranma continued. "People say and do things they regret all the
time. I know I regret alot of the things I did four years ago.
You've just gotta sort it out with Ukyou, let her know your
limits, let her know that she can't control you." Ranma let go
of Ryoga's shoulder and stood up. "I'll bet you anything that
she regrets her actions now."

Ryoga looked up at him. "Who knew." he muttered.

"Huh?"

"Who knew that under that selfish, womanizing, rude exterior
there was a mature man in Ranma Saotome." there was a ghost
of a smile on Ryoga's face.

Ranma blinked, then he grinned. "Who knew," he countered.
"Under that angry, depressed, directionless exterior there
was a smart arse in Ryoga Hibiki." he walked away.

Ryoga stood up and looked down the driveway. "I'm not going
to let it end like this."

***

Ukyou stood in line at the ticket counter and tried to stop
trembling. She had been shaking since she left Akane, at
first she thought it was with rage, but now she wasn't so
sure. Doubts were assaulting her, drawing away her rage and
leaving her feeling drained and miserable.

"<Next!>"

Ukyou moved up to the counter. "<One to Shanghai, please.>"
she managed in halting Chinese. She passed over the money
and he gave her a ticket.

"<Platform 2, ten minutes.>"

"Xiexie."

She walked away, staring at the ticket in her hand. *Before
I started this tour I couldn't speak or understand Chinese.*

A recent memory presented itself to her troubled mind. Hong
Kong, Ryoga's hotel room, lying in bed and laughing as Ryoga
corrected her Mandarin pronounciation. Ukyou sighed. *He was
so patient, so _kind_.* Tears trickled down her cheeks and
she brushed them away. *I swear, I've down more crying in these
last weeks than in my whole life! But...*

*You laughed alot too.*

Ukyou stopped in the middle of the crowd.

*Ryoga made you feel good. And you... you just thought about
yourself, not him. Ryoga was right, you should have believed
in him.*

"No." Ukyou whispered oblivious to the people bumping into
her as they hurried on their way.

*If you leave now you _will_ be alone forever. Don't run.
Take responsibilty!*

Ukyou looked at the ticket in her hand. Over the bustle of
the station she heard the announcement.

"<The 10.40pm train to Shanghai will be leaving in five
minutes. All passengers please board.>"

The ticket fell to the ground and was trampled on as Ukyou
ran... for the exit, for the hostel and Ryoga.

***

Ryoga stood in the driveway of the hostel, staring down
the road that Ukyou had run down when she left him.

"Ukyou... Ukyou..."

"Uh, Ryoga, I'm over here."

"UCCHAN!!!!" Ryoga spun to see Ukyou behind him. She was
pale and had tear marks on her cheeks, and she was not
looking at him.

"Ucchan?" he asked.

She bit her lip. "I... I... All I can say is I'm sorry,
and I know you've heard that but I really mean it this time
I didn't think about your feelings I was just so scared
and so selfish what we have is so special and wonderful I
didn't want it to ever end and then you got hurt and it
was all my fault if I'd never talked to that guy he wouldn't
have found you and..."

"WHOAAAAA!!!" Ryoga threw up his hands. "Please stop! I
forgive you already!"

"You do?" Ukyou looked up into his big brown baby seal eyes.
"But I was so horrible to you."

"Well I wasn't exactly polite back."

"But you had good reason."

"That's still no excuse. Ukyou, I love you, and I don't want
to lose you either. But if I don't fight Kazeten, I won't
BE me, and you'll lose Ryoga Hibiki anyway."

Ukyou smiled. "I wouldn't want that." she said softly. She
walked over to him and putting her arms around his waist
she leaned her head on his shoulder. "Who would I have all
that fun with in bed?" she tilted her head and smiled up
at him.

Ryoga blinked. "I was hoping our relationship was based on
more solid grounds." he said putting his arms around her.

Ukyou tightened her grip. "Heh." she grinned. "Of course
it is... oh." she pulled back and still within the circle
of his arms, she pulled the ring he had given her off her
finger. "Here." she held it up. "There's no need for me to
have this now."

"Why not?" Ryoga said.

"B-but... you only got this because you thought I was..."

"That doesn't mean I _don't_ want to marry you. We can
just move the timetable back a bit."

Ukyou's mouth opened and shut several times for a moment.
"Well, I... yes, I guess so." she fiddled with the ring.

Ryoga took it and her left hand and pushed it back onto
her ring finger. "I'll get you a better one later." he
said softly.

"Don't." said Ukyou. "I like this one." She moved close to
him again. "So, where's my kiss?"

"What?"

She raised an eyebrow. Ryoga grinned and kissed her.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING IN PUBLIC!!!!!!" screamed
Mikado.

"Who are you to talk?!" said Miya. "You've been kissing
everyone in public!"

"Whoa... now _that's_ a kiss." said Godai.

"Yes, don't they need air?" asked Kiyone.

"I've done better." sneered Ranma.

"Aiyaa... Airen very good kisser." Shampoo beamed at
Ranma.

Akane gripped her trusty mallet. "Oh yeah?"

Mousse opened the window and leaned out. "Would you two
_please_ go to your room? Some of us are trying to think
pure thoughts here!"

"Shut up Mousse!" Ryoga yelled.

"My my, he managed to unlock himself to say that." said
Nabiki. "But I don't think it will last, yes, there they
go again."

***

The next morning:

"Okay, so what's the plan now?" asked Mousse over breakfast.
"I presume you want to take care of a certain stuck-up
martial artist Ryoga."

"No, I took care of Ranma ages ago."

"WHAT??? WHEN??!!!" Ranma spluttered.

Mousse coughed. "I was referring to Kazeten."

"Oh," said Ryoga, ignoring Ranma. "That's definitely high
up on my things to do list, however at the moment I don't
know where he is, or where he's heading, and I don't want
to go out and get lost trying to find him. So we're just
going to continue on as normal and if we run into him,
well... this time we won't stop to see if he's okay." He
smiled nastily.

"Ryoga's so strong!" Ukyou cooed. Most of the table felt
physically ill.

"Ukyou's so smart!" Ryoga cooed back.

Ranma made gagging motions.

"Enough already, okay, you're back together and everything's
happy. And... stuff went on last night that I don't want
to know about... although from now on someone ELSE can sleep
next door to you guys... So can you PLEASE STOP DOING THAT
CUTESY WUTESY stuff?? Pleeeeeeeease..."

"Ohh..." said Ryoga. "All right, if it'll make you feel
better."

"Thank you," sighed Ranma. "The floor you save could be
your own."

"Yuck. Stay away from me Saotome."

"So, onwards and outwards?" asked Suka.

"Up, up and away!" grinned Godai.

***

The bus travelled down the road at it's usual breakneck
speed. On board, the group were once more singing. This
time united in a chorus of "I Wanna Hold Your Hand".

"And when you touch me I feel happy inside,
It's such a feeling that my love... I can't hide!
I can't hide! I can't hide!
Yeah yeah yeah oh please...
Say to me..."

"Why are we stopping?" asked Akane.

"I don't know what the next line is," said Ranma.

"I meant the BUS. Why is the BUS stopping?"

"Sorry gang, roadblock." said Ryoga. He pulled over and
leaned out his open window. He opened his mouth when
suddenly Mousse got in his way.

"Allow me to translate for you Ryoga," he said, nudging
Ryoga ineffectively in the ribs. "Remember, you don't
speak Chinese!" he shot a meaningful look at Shampoo.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Go ahead Mousse."

"<What seems to be the problem officer?>" Mousse asked.

"<We've had reports of some terrorists in the area,>"
replied the policeman. "<They blew up a nightclub in
Bangkok and destroyed a border post in Burma and we've
been tipped off that they're travelling around here in
a bus matching this description.>"

Ryoga tried not to panic.

"<That's terrible!>" said Mousse. "<But I can assure you,
we're just tourists.>"

The policeman looked at him narrowly. "<Possibly sir, but
do you have any ID?>"

"<Certainly,>" Mousse fished around in his shirt sleeves.
Ryoga sweated as he noticed other policemen checking out
the registration of the bus.

"<My passport,>" said Mousse. "<As you can see, I haven't
left Hong Kong in a while.>"

"<Yes,>" said the guard. "<But... wait a minute... I
thought I recognised you!>"

*Oh NO!* thought Ryoga. *We're DOOMED!*

"<You're Mu Shu! My daughter has all your albums! We saw
your movie seventeen times! You're much shorter in real
life.>"

It was all Ryoga could do not to facefault. Shampoo was
laughing up the back of the bus.

Mousse grinned at the policeman. "<Always happy to meet a
fan. I'm taking a break after finishing the movie and
getting away from it all for a while.>"

"<I see, well... watch out for those terrorists, though
I bet with those moves of yours you could take them out
without any problem!>"

Mousse grinned. "<We will... would you like me to sign
something for your daughter?>"

"<_Would_ I?>"

Five minutes later the group rolled off again.

"Oh my GOD!!!" Ryoga gasped quietly. "I thought that was
it!!!"

Mousse looked at him oddly. "What's the matter Hibiki? It
was just a case of mistaken identity... they were looking
for some terrorists, that's all."

"Err..."

Mousse stared at Ryoga. "Oh no... Don't tell me that YOU..."

"It was an accident!" Ryoga wailed. "Although I did do it
on purpose in Burma but it was necessary!"

"Argh! I just lied to a police officer!!!"

"Sssssshhhh..." Ryoga looked around worriedly. "Ucchan, I
think we'd better stick to the back roads from now on. The
next guy might not be a fan."

After she had been filled in on the conversation, Ukyou had
to agree with this strategy. And so it was that the group
found themselves bumping over a dirt road in a deserted
area.

"Hmmm..." said Konatsu. "You know, back in my ninja days,
this would have been the perfect spot for..."

"HIBIKI! PREPARE TO DIE!"

"An ambush. Oops."

Kazeten stepped out from hiding as the bus came to a halt
in front of a huge roadblock.

"Oh no!" moaned Kiyone.

"Oh yes!" said Ryoga. "It's payback time!"

"You go get him honey. I believe in you." Ukyou chirruped.

"WILL YOU TWO PLEASE STOP DOING THAT!!! SOME OF US HAVE
WEAK STOMACHS!!!"

Kazeten waved an arm as the group got off the bus and they
found themselves surrounded by henchpeople.

"Still trying to run away Hibiki?" he asked. "You may
have evaded the police, but you won't evade ME!"

"YOU set the cops on us," said Ryoga. "That was pretty
low."

Kazeten laughed, "Nothing more than you deserve - framing
you for the actions of a group of heartless terrorists
seemed only fair."

Everyone sweatdropped.

"Now, you will take what's coming to you!" Kazeten
cracked his knuckles.

"Give it your best shot!" Ryoga snarled. "I'm really ready
for this." He got into position.

"Oh changed your tune now have you chicken?"

"I'LL SHOW YOU WHO'S A CHICKEN!!!" And with that, Ryoga
attacked.

The battle was fast and furious. Few of the group were
able to follow it completely, mainly because to prevent
their interference, they were now being attacked by the
henchpeople.

"Kisama!" yelled Suka, punching another one in the face.
The henchman went down.

"Take THAT!" yelled Miya, wrapping a chain around anothers
throat.

"They're GOOD," said Akane. "Not martial artists, but I
wouldn't wanna meet them in a dark alleyway."

"Pay attention to your own fight stupid!" yelled Ranma.

"Don't worry about me you baka, I'm just... FINE!" Akane
brought her mallet down on another henchwoman's head.

"Argh!" yelled Mikado. "I need to be on skates! I need
to be on skates!"

"This is why you should learn different techniques," said
Konatsu, throwing shuriken left and right.

Nabiki ducked. "Some help would be appreciated. I'm not
a martial artist you know!"

Ranma punched out her attackers.

"Hey... thanks Saotome."

"That's okay... sis." Ranma winked at her.

Godai desperately threw dirt in the faces of the three
henchpeople advancing on him and Kiyone. Kiyone was trying
to tell him to let her handle it, but he was beyond hearing,
concentrating only on protecting her.

Meanwhile the competition between Ryoga and Kazeten raged
on. Ryoga was tough... but so was Kazeten. For every
lightning fist there was a bakusai tenketsu, and both
men took serious damage.

Finally Kazeten whipped out a throwing knife and hurled it
at Ryoga's heart. Ryoga deflected it with a bandanna, and
it buried itself in the bus.

"HEY!!!" yelled Ukyou. "THAT'S MY BUS!!!! YOU JERK! RYOGA!
I INSIST THAT YOU KILL HIM NOW!!!"

"I'm on it!" Ryoga called back.

"This is stupid," Shampoo said. "Lost boy no can win. He
loser. Shampoo finish stupid... other boy." She leapt up.

"Shampoo NO!" Mousse yelled. "This is RYOGA'S fight."

Shampoo ignored him. He ran a few steps and launched himself
up in front of her. "I won't let you interfere. Ryoga is my
friend. Now."

"Mousse get out of way!"

"Dammit, I told you to stay out of it!" Mousse yelled.

Shampoo drew her fist back and struck out, but she never
connected.

"I won't let you screw up anyone else's life! You've done
enough damage! LEAVE THEM ALONE!" said Mousse. "Take THIS!"
From out of his sleeves he made appear two swords, a
carving knife, a steak knife and...

"That's MY umbrella!" Ryoga yelled in outrage, halting in
mid throw.

"Oh." Mousse looked embarrassed. "Is it?" He tried to look
innocent.

"Yes it is!" Ryoga continued to yell. "I lost that three
years ago. I looked _everywhere_ for it. Obviously I
should have looked up your sleeves!"

"Hey now... I found it, that's all." Mousse waved his hands
but Ryoga would not be silenced.

"You STOLE my umbrella!"

"I did NOT!" yelled Mousse. "You left it lying around."

"Ryoga honey calm down." said Ukyou. "It's just an umbrella."

"You don't understand!" said Ryoga. "It's not just ANY
umbrella - it's a family heirloom! It's been in my family for
eight generations!"

"Passed down through the ages by chance encounters," muttered
Ranma, ducking a nunchuk.

"You shut up! You have NO idea the hell my father put me
through when he found out that I lost it." Ryoga was furious.

"Father?" said Shampoo. "You have a father?"

"Of _course_ I have a father," snarled Ryoga. "I have a
mother too! Somewhere." he added.

"Uh, excuse me," said Kazeten. "But weren't we supposed to
be fighting to the death here?"

"No, before we were just fighting." said Ryoga. He grabbed
the umbrella from Mousse.

"NOW we're fighting to the death."

Kazeten shrugged, what good was an umbrella going to do
him?

"YAAAAAAAHHH!!!"

Kazeten ducked as the umbrella nearly took his head off.
*Alright, tactical error. Mental note: next time, don't
let him get his hands on the umbrella!* He looked around
quickly, *Diversion. I need a diversion!*

The two strange Chinese people were now at a standoff.
The rest of the group were putting up a good fight against
his henchpeople, in spite of being outnumbered five to one.
The Chinese girl avoided the Chinese man and launched
herself at him. He realised that he would be unable to
avoid her sword.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Ryoga yelled. "This is MY fight!"

"You too useless," Shampoo smiled cruelly.

Kazeten backed away. "I see you have another girl to help
you." he taunted Ryoga. "Are you screwing your way around
the world Hibiki?"

"WHAAAAAAT???!!!"

"YOU I KILL!!!" screeched Shampoo. *THONK* She keeled over.
Mousse sheathed the ornate carved Indian pole he had hit
her with. "Damn, that felt good. Carry on Ryoga."

Kazeten sweatdropped. This was not a good situation.
Suddenly there was a change in the status of the fight
below.

"Godai!" screamed Kiyone, as a henchman's fist slammed
into his stomach. He went down, and the henchman raised his
foot to kick him in the head.

*Yes,* thought Kazeten.

"You're DEAD!" she screamed, and reaching into her jacket,
she pulled out a gun.

*Oh Q@#%!!!!!!!*

Kiyone looked around her. "Where did they all go?"

Everyone stared at her incredulously. The henchpeople had
run the minute they saw the weapon.

"Where the HELL did you get a GUN???" demanded Ranma. "Is
it real?"

"Of course it's real!" And just to prove it, Kiyone blew
apart a nearby tree. "Errr... it's a laser gun. I'm
probably not supposed to use it unless it's an emergency,
but Godai..."

"Ufff..." said Godai.

"Put it AWAY! Do you want us to get arrested?" demanded
Nabiki.

"I... is it a crime in China too? I know it is in Japan,
but..."

"You mean you've been carrying this around for the _entire_
trip???!!!"

"Uhhh... yes?"

Everyone facefaulted. As they picked themselves up, Ukyou
noticed someone was absent.

"Where'd Kazeten go?"

Ryoga looked around and spotted a letter. He picked up the
hastily written missive and read it.

"It says: This is not the end! I shall return and you
shall feel my wrath. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!"

"Whoa, he's seriously unbalanced," said Mikado.

"Oh you only just picked that one up did you?" asked
Ryoga. "Sheesh. Well, one thing's for sure." he patted his
trusty umbrella. "I'm ready for him... and anyone else
that feels they have something to take up with me!"

"RYOGA-CHAN!"

"Oh hell!"

to be continued... 

 

Chapter 22

Index