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Background Music Files
December 25, 2003
Merry Christmas =)
December 19, 2003
Some fun after finals:
NBA Jam 1, 2
Falcon 4.0 1, 2
X-Wing Alliance 1, 2, 3
F-Zero 1, 2.
December 17, 2003
*sigh* I love midis. And again, I highly recommend 'A Beautiful Mind' to whoever hasn't watched it =) Every time I watch it, I discover new things about the film. Heh, your mind and eyes start to wander once you've watched something before.. the last time I watched it, I drew parallels between Nash's close circle of friends w/my own. Even though Nash was irrational and stuff at times, his friends (and also his wife) never shunned him. They didn't care about how Nash's troubles might affect them, because they knew who he really was. And that was: a good friend as well. I think it's one of the main reasons why I love my group of friends. We would never ask each other about each others' score on the last exam. Or compete over the stupidest things I see other 'friends' compete in. It's about being there regardless of the things that matter, and the things that don't. Minimal questions asked =P
December 16, 2003
Well there goes the 441 final. He changed the format from fill-in to scantron. I'm guessing profs have a lot of work to do at the end. Haha, I still have yet to talk 'offline' to him about those Dilbert references.. but I guess I'll be spending a lot of time w/him next semester since I may be his TA.
So anyways.. should we just let people be? Will they grow up alright if we dictate and constantly teach them stuff, or if we just left them alone and provided just food, love, and a roof over their heads? I've always wondered... and I don't suppose we can ever stop.
December 15, 2003
Busy semester, but not bad altogether. Not worried about my finals.. it'll be alright. Had I been this focused and productive a couple of years ago, who knows where I'd be by now. Hmmm. Been talking on the phone like a maniac this semester. Pretty fun. I think it's really therapeutic. It's a big world, and it's just us.
I've learned a great deal this semester, both in and out of the classroom. A lot of the stuff I've 'learned' just reinforces what I already know, but lack some consistency in. Heh, experience is a lousy teacher, but it's effective. Over the past several months, I have observed, and thought. Stepped back and looked at everything big and small.. Much of it has to do with the cliche of 'how to be a person'. I never really understood this concept grownups would tell kids until recently. Or maybe I didn't want to. That changed this semester however, when I realized that some people just did not know the concept at all. So I've learned.. from the worst. I've learned better than anyone could've taught me what not to do or how to act, by seeing people do it. It's high impact.. and I kinda feel a little guilty about it, but o wells.
A thought I've had for some time now is whether to let things be. Specifically, people and perspectives of things.
<< to be cont'd... >>
December 10, 2003
I am away from my computer right now.
December 4, 2003
"KC, you'll be OK." =)
-DC
November 26, 2003
"Bringing textbooks home during break is just like carrying rocks back and forth."
-KCKC
November 25, 2003
*sigh* So many busy weeks... but I suppose once you've settle into a routine.. even if there's a lot of stuff to do, it doesn't seem all that bad. Tons of work perhaps... but I think it's the random things which come up, that make the days seem more busy and chaotic. Haha, just one little morning class tomorrow, and I can get the heck outta here! Whooo!!! Thanksgiving. I can feel it =D
November 22, 2003
Ahhh.. great weather the past two days. Blue skies, sunlight shining through the trees.. *sigh* I can smell winter in the breeze, won't be long until the long shadows of winter are here...
November 18, 2003
Quiet afternoon.. nothing like silence to make the looming work more intimidating. Though I finally got some of the pictures from DC renamed. Here's 'Angelic Chord'... in Baltimore actually =)
November 17, 2003
This week is going to be the worst of the semester so far. I know I've said this last week and the week before that, but whoa!! =T Projects or tests in every class, team meetings, interview w/Publisher's Clearing House, and errands up the wazoo... I CAN'T WAIT FOR THANKSGIVING. No Master Grill please.
November 16, 2003
Getting (c)older here..
November 15, 2003
I don't know whose painting is out in the suite, but I want to draw.
November 13, 2003
Whew, another long week. Work work work... doesn't look like I'll be home free until the 24th =T Very windy all day today, pretty cool.. helps clear the air around here. Though I don't really like the humidity in the dorm these days; too dry. We usually leave the window open for fresh air, and the heater makes it worse. Cold air can't hold as much water vapor as warm air. When the dry winter air blows in, it gets heated up, lowering the relative humidity in here even more. Maybe I should bring a humidifier...
November 11, 2003
So refreshing tonight. Just got back from my marketing group meeting, and I'm still amazed about how well we all work together. This is turning out to be the best group project I have participated in. Everyone is so respectful of each other it's just so professional and refreshing.
November 9, 2003
My gosh I really hope those two grad students aren't in the racquetball tournament. But that's a later concern... got so much to do this week. Don't know if I can finish all by next Monday. Grrr, gotta restrain myself from F4 or Shota No Sushi. Though, I wish I had my 'A Beautiful Mind' DVD with me. Blah.. post more later... just dropped by Geocities... it's part of my M-F routine =)
November 3, 2003
You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
October 28, 2003
Laugh until you have no more tears =D
October 27, 2003
And October is almost over... about time. Haha, can't wait for Thanksgiving.
There's a thought that has been creeping up on me. Listening to my music brings up a lot of memories, and my selection pretty much guarantees that. I'm thinking when we love someone, and then come out of it, what gives us the signal, right, and reason to love again? When I am with a person I used to like, I might have a weak spot for her, but otherwise, I don't feel much outside of a friendship. That's to be expected.. but it's a long way from the feelings I've had before. It's such a big difference. If people can go from loving someone so much, to this, or hating them... what does that say about their love in the first place? Hmmm, it's a thought alright.. but I am glad to be able to love again.
O right, I think it was a lyrics site I went to that changed my homepage. Bastards... now I gotta find out their email addresses without actually going to their site. On my computer at least >=)
October 23, 2003
Elementary Chinese for Chinese Speakers is insane.. 'learning' Chinese for the FOBs in it, is like learning phonics to us. GRRR.. and what's with the annoying guy and annoying girl??! This isn't 5th grade in China. They really piss me off sometimes... Damn FOBs, I am so glad the new SATs have an essay section.
October 19, 2003
FUGGIN' SPYWARE/HIJACKER/ADS DIE!!! Took over an hour to kill the crap dl'd onto my system... geez!! Everyone should scan their computers; I found 23 instances of unauthorized changes, downloads, etc.. Three useful programs are ZoneAlarm, Ad-aware, and Spybot - Search & Destroy. I'd install Google Toolbar too, it directly searches Google.com and blocks popups. GRRRRR, When I find out the sites that did this, I'm gonna sign them up to every damn spamming operation I can find >=T
October 14, 2003
Games are bad for you.. but Falcon 4 is ok.
Hmmm... I wonder if I ever posted this pic before.
October 12, 2003
*sigh* Finished GTO =) It really gets you thinking about a lot of things. Like how so few teachers really care about their students. I found the ending and pace a little awkwards at times, but overall, it was a great series. The first episode however was awesome. I love the music, and parts when individual students realized that they were closeminded and then opened up. It's hard not to get misty when that happens. (Especially when Onizuka himself gets sheds some tears too.) O yea, we finally did something about that leaky toilet smell and stuff in the bathroom. With our Glade scented oils now... it's like you're shitting flowers in there =P
October 11, 2003
Lots of work as usual coming up this week, but I think it'll be alright.. it's not doing too little work; it's playing too much. Haha, we finally got the opportunity to play Falcon 4 over the net. Dogfighting a human is just pure adrenaline. Anyways, I must update my resume for the job fair on Wednesday. Haven't touched it since HS. Of course, I've accomplished so much since then... my Harvard MBA and outstanding work at McKinsey are just the tip of the iceberg =P
October 10, 2003
GRRR.. my power supply's fan is dying now. Stupid thing won't go out quietly too.. it's not responding to my taps as much anymore.
October 9, 2003
Bread seems to be pretty even.
October 8, 2003
Girls like pasta and guys like rice. Agreed?
October 5, 2003
Uh-oh, my screen is starting to spaz on me. It's randomly shifting left and right over a distance of like 1mm. It may be time to go monitor shopping again =\
Iron Chef Morimoto kicked ass today in the cod roe overtime SCALLION battle. Heh, I love scallions, and it's about time they took center stage =)
October 1, 2003
Just one more busy day and this long week will be over... (next week is much much better than this week) My hard drive and CDRs are finally getting here too =)
I was surprised in class today when my mind wandered and came to the conclusion how I actually do not hate all my business courses this semester. I like business.. not necessarily screwing poeple over, but the mutually beneficial aspects of it. The interactions, skills, and experiences that come along with it... It's in stark contrast to my days as a compsci major, when I hated all my classes. I'm beginning to finally figure out how it all started. My dad was compsci, and we've had computers in our house since I was four. Well, family influences played a factor, but mostly, I think my innate curiousity was most satisfied by computers, so I stuck with it for a long time. But then as I grew up, it became apparent that I'd wind up sitting in front of a monitor 24/7. Programming BTW, does not satisfy any urges of mine whatsoever... This probably drove me away from compsci before I even consciously realized it. I should have came to this conclusion earlier, since it would've saved me much aggravation and time. For example, working at MTC, I became more interested in operating a business, rather than the actual computer products and services we were providing. *sigh* Of course... hindsight is 20/20. This doesn't mean I don't follow or like computers.. it is really two different issues. I'm fascinated by computers, but I hate them.
September 28, 2003
Ehhh... this weekend just flew by, and now today is another 'weekday'... It's been pretty much a month into the semester and I don't feel satisfied with my routines. It's just not busy enough in some places, and too busy in others. Amidst all the flurry of work, boredom, and fun; I feel the larger movement of time engulfing everything around me. As if I'm on the surface of the water, waves bobbing me up and down, but still in the same place. Hmmm...
September 22, 2003
Yea, I don't have the time to make real posts.. =)
September 21, 2003
"Wow! You have three masters degrees and a PhD!" "Yes, it's all very impressive, but interestingly, I have no common sense whatsoever." "That's not the sort of thing you should say during a job interview." "I don't see why not."
September 19, 2003
Nine hours of class made all better by Keira Knightley =)
September 8, 2003
I have never seen so many students on campus ever! I remember you used to be able to see clear across the academic mall... not anymore. It's like looking into a forest of people now. I bet Stony's racking up them tuition revenues, and skimping out on housing. I hear stories about how the U. lies to parents when they say they won't triple their kid, but then end up tripling every freshman. They're turning on the fountain daily too, trying to make the campus look nice.
Heh, the fountain springs water within a circular pool just inside the main entrance of the university at the head of the academic mall. There's also a series of little waterfalls flowing in between and parallel the steps for the main entrance leading up to the fountain/academic mall. It doesn't really bother me, but for people who may practice or understand feng-shui, the fountain looks to be a feng-shui nightmare. Water usually symbolizes wealth or money. I think that's why lots of Chinese people like to have tanks of water and fish around... it's like having a cache of wealth in their home or restaurant. Stony on the other hand, would rather have that 'wealth' spring up at the head of the academic mall, and then appear to flow down a series of little cascades out the front door of the university =)
Haha, I have to admit, Stony does look alright in the summer, as long as you don't realize that fields of lawn are actually all weeds regularly cut to grass length.
September 5, 2003
160 HD more trouble than it's worth, exchanging for the 120 one instead. Damn controller card slows down everything, esp. boot.
US Open; breathtaking. Go Roddick and Henin-Hardenne! Insane one-handed backhand whip technique... how does she do it?
All classes finalized. Restless nights and busy days... can I do this? Honestly: maybe.
Sick. Grrr, stupid cold... running out of tissues.
Inspired... must make time to play rball tomorrow. Gotta work on my backhand =)
September 4, 2003
Ugh, I was just here last week!! *sigh* This semester's looking to be the busiest yet. So many classes and things to do. To kick off this wonderful session, our quad's power died late yesterday evening... after a whole day of no electricity, we're running on diesel generators that they trucked in for now =T Sucks. Which reminds me, the 160GB HD I bought recently isn't booting for some reason, despite the fact that I installed Win2K on it fresh, and it being the sole drive in the system. Really weird. Gotta give Western Digital a call again. At least their customer service/tech support is getting even better.
O wells.. since I don't have class tomorrow, I made an F-16 wallpaper from one of the load screens in Falcon 4.0. It's the same color as my existing desktop, and leaves space on the sides to accomodate my two rows of icons on the left, buddy list on the right, and winamp that docks on the top. It should be easy on Windows startup too, at 1024 x 768 pixels/60Kb. Enjoy =)
August 21, 2003
WHOOO! All done now!! Haha, perfect timing too, seeing how I just broke my last good ball and snapped my strings playing tonight. Wonderful. Good thing I had bought another copy of my racquet =) Maybe this time I'm going to tell them to string my racquet with slightly less tension than it comes with from the factory. I think it's harder to learn strokes on my racquet because it's so light and stiff. Since that gives more power over control, the feedback from a hit isn't as good as a "cushier" racquet. Shots are either awesome, or not so good... so it's hard to judge exactly what you're doing wrong. Only by swinging correctly, and hitting it very clean and precise can you get good feedback about your stroke. The light weight (175 grams) also doesn't help you get down your swing, because it doesn't penalize (hurt) you for a bad swing as much as a heavier racquet. Haha, the Ti-175XL probably isn't a great learning racquet, but I love it =P
August 18, 2003
It's crunch time; 3 finals this week. This summer session pretty much flew by me. I got to do almost everything I planned to do... I liked my classes, played rball 6 days out of the week, went 'home' a few times, ate alright, got in five campaign days on Falcon 4... I guess the only thing I didn't do was circulate that handball wall petition =T
Been trying to find some GATTACA midis, but no luck so far. Grrr, I want a keyboard, so I can make my own songs and midis! Haha, yea it's my soundtrack obsession talking now... I stumbled upon the script for the movie a while ago. I never knew scripts were so straight-forward... leaves a lot to the actors, director, and musicians to work with.
August 15, 2003
Blackouts in the northeast... check out the before and after DMSP pictures. Geez... some places seemed to have just blanked out, like Canada's capital, Ottawa. I'd say out here in Stony, the situation was mostly restless and boring. Haha, doing the 249 homework by hand passed a good 2 hours. (Of course, 20 minutes after I finished, the power came back on and it took 15 minutes to redo in Excel) We're just fortunate out here that it wasn't really inconvenient, stressing, and financially damaging. Though I think an event like this does help in raising awareness of our aging power grid system, while giving us an oppotunity to work together and exercise our options in a state of emergency.
"This is New York City. We can take it."
-Denzel Washington in The Siege
August 12, 2003
Blah.. I knew I should've brought along the manual... I don't know how to scan for naval targets on radar! Unfortunately, flying really fast and low over the water doesn't seem to take me out of their missile envelopes. Grrr, waste so much time/fuel not being able to fly direct over water...
Though, I can get in lots of reading during longer overland flights. Working part of that half-foot stack of mags from home, and there's always ethics articles or chapters in The Handmaid's Tale. THT is an interesting book: it paints a picture of a future dsytopian society where humans have tainted the environment so that viable births are down. Abortions are illegal, and segments of women are designated kind of like the 'wombs of society', valued only for their precious reproductive capacities. Though her ideas are good, I think the author (Margaret Atwood) is best at writing as if really she were really a handmaid in this society. I'm surprised at how well Atwood can express the inner-feelings of the experiences by a fictious woman valued only for her womb. There are several parts of the novel where circumstances change for the main character, and each time, Atwood makes it so that you can really understand and feel for the way the character thinks and behaves. It feels totally realistic. It stands out because I don't see this kind of- not style, but ability often.
August 10, 2003
Falcon 4.0 lesson of the day: "Remember to RTFM..."
August 9, 2003
More Schwarzenegger movies on TV these days... and he has made a lot of movies. Haha, well at least most of the are pretty good.
August 4, 2003
Two tests and a paper, and I'll be able to go home. First time I'll be seeing our Taurus... hmmm, wonder what happened with the 'Olds. Haha, should really get a phone for my room. Probably time to return my overdue library book too =)
August 3, 2003
If there's a thing to learn about sports, it's to never give up. Today I played someone of similar level to myself... and I think either of us could've won. But the reason I won was because no matter how improbable my return would be, I still scrambled for them. Even if I in fact did not reach the ball, it was my effort that unnerved him. It really puts pressure on you to make better shots if an opponent is going all out. And most of the time, people yield to the pressure, causing them to make shots they can't pull off consistently.
July 31, 2003
Halfway through the session... things are going well. Lots of reading to do and tests every other week, but not bad. Business Ethics and Women's Studies are interesting classes. Really makes you think about why you believe in certain things. Like, when guys get pissed at each other, they punch each other out. When girls get pissed, they also want to ruin reputations. Does the infighting between females mean that they've accepted their place as second-class in our society? Hmmm, after discussions... one reason was because many girls hold their self worth in terms of guys. Destroying each other in terms not limited to violence reduced the value of other girls socially.
OK, enough of that stuff... yesterday was a breakthrough... finally getting that backhand whip down, a year after Ed showed me. Ugh, why the heck did it take so long? In any case, I feel the motion, and the crisp contact more and more now. I have still yet to master it, but at least now I can bring some effective offense on my left side. Alright, typing about it is no fun... it's time to play =)
July 28, 2003
Mazda Rev-It-Up was great. I guess none of us were totally impressed w/the 6, but I liked the MPV and RX-8. Haha, driving there was an integral part of all the fun, even though traffic was mysteriously present at odd times. Hahaha.. Roy Roger's salad buffet wasn't too bad... We got to the outskirts of DC at 2am and spent an hour knocking on CHKs brother's door. (I'm surprised no neighbors came out.) It was nice of him to let us bunk at his place. Nights there were pretty fun, though we were tired and sticky from the day most times. Saturday was best; sweating, driving, standing in line, go-karting, and finding out the horrible combination of coconut rum and green tea... (tastes like rubber) Visiting Baltimore on Sunday brought back memories of family road trips, and it was interesting to be outside the context of that while being in the same place. Unfortunately, we weren't able to squeeze Washington DC in to any meaningful extent, and Wins missed his 8:05pm flight. *sigh* With our schedules all wack, I'm hoping we can all still get together at least one more time before fall =)
July 27, 2003
...I may drive a minivan.
July 24, 2003
When I grow up...
July 21, 2003
Ahhh... how thin a blanket, and the comforting protection it can provide... *sigh* Can you imagine huddling in your blanket at night, fearing monsters/T-1000/midterms? If some liquid metal terminator were out to get me, my blanket isn't gonna do diddly. But it's amazing how much a few millimeters of polyester helps.
July 18, 2003
Oh L'Amour... I love 80s music. Haha, I've worn out tapes with repeated playing and rewinding in order to listen to the instrumental break for this song countless times. Now I just press the 'left arrow' button in wamp =)
July 16, 2003
I think it was in the March 15th entry that I said WMDs are the reason I supported war in Iraq. How the world can change in a few months... right now we can not find these weapons, and newer threats seem to be looming on the horizon. (North Korea seems to be our next worry since they 'most likely' have nuclear devices. We already know they possess the missiles to deliver them.) After these WMD search problems in Iraq, it's going to be hard for the US to proceed to legitimately protect its interests in front of the rest of the world.
Is our intelligence getting stupider? I would've figured there'd be more of a debate over whether to impeach President Bush and hold him accountable, even though the head of the CIA is taking most the blame for inaccurate information leading up to Bush's decision. We almost impeached Clinton on grounds that he lied about his private sex life. Not only did that probably not affect his job as president, it didn't involve a huge committment of dollars, int'l goodwill, and lives as going into Iraq did. I'm also disappointed with how our government is handling Iraq, stating that the we will be in there for years. I'm sure that's not what most Iraqis are feeling great about...
*sigh* Well, back to reading...
July 15, 2003
Whooo! Now that I've been to all my summer classes, I'm foreseeing many busy days ahead. I was absolutely thrilled when I found out 'management science' is aka 'operations research' =T
I'm still hooked on Coco Lee's 'Love So Real'... it's starting to chip away at 'Always Be My Baby' as my all-time favorite song (w/singing). I translated it last night while swishing Listerine for ten minutes =)
July 14, 2003
Back out in Stony, and today was the first day of class. Should be pretty interesting, even though it seems unrelated, 'women's studies' is feeling a lot like 'modern Japanese history' class. I like these smaller classes actually. It's a lot more interactive. More on this later probably...
Yesterday was Elaine's birthday, so Happy Birthday! Thanks for planning something so I would get to meet up w/o everyone before summer session... too bad Jackie had softball practice and I had to get home early... haha, it's not every day I get to meet a wacko who likes dogs... It's pretty weird how I have the strangest feeling I've met some of your friends before.
Watching '42nd Street' was very enlightening to say the least. Being there with live performers (not to mention our awesome front row seats) blew me away. No movie has done that to me... I realize now that there are so many people we see everyday, who seem normal, but are incredibly talented with their dreams. On a stage with thousands of eyes on them; acting, dancing, and singing... it must take a level of committment to perform for others that almost makes it not seem like work.
July 9, 2003
Falcon 4.0 lesson of the day: "Afterburner your egress, so you'll be around to land on fumes."
July 7, 2003
Gotta get out over to Stony next week for Summer Session 2. Blah... at least there's the faster connection. No more handball however, and rball sucks in the summer w/o AC. Which reminds me, need to remember to start circulating another petition for a handball court on campus. (Someone already did one but I don't think it worked.)
A few treats during the session at least; paintball, Mazda Rev-It-Up, a single room, papers to grade... haha, maybe even a nice BBQ with the Angels. *sigh* We're getting so old. I crack up every time I think about the time we were eating chicken nuggets at WINs 3 in the morning, and Chuing whines, "Man, we're old geezers." hahaha... That was three years ago.
July 4, 2003
Whooo! July 4th!!! The flags look so nice fluttering in the sun, and the aroma of sizzling meat wafting through the neighborhood... For at least a while, everyone can just enjoy themselves.
Today's also the 5 year anniversary of this post page. Geez, looking back on the first entry, it's really been a while. I celebrated by waking up early and installing new batteries in the TV remote. Of course, I couldn't get any Wimbledon, so I played handball w/Han Ching, Jamie, and Mike... very exciting to say the least, sure brought back those good ol' HS memories =)
June 28, 2003
Telemarketing in the US has increased fivefold in the past decade. And we're finally doing something about it... Ugh, I love it when I'm waken up by a telemarketer. Our number gets at least half a dozen calls a day, with a one day record of like 23 calls. People who wish to screen out most telemarketers can register their phone number(s) at the National Do Not Call Registry website.
June 26, 2003
"Hot town, summer in the city... back of my handball gloves getting nice and gritty."
June 24, 2003
Geez, today's dental appointment was a total nightmare. I know scalings hurt, but today was just seriously an outlier in sheer pain! You'd think that w/the level of pain endured, my pearly whites would be well taken care of... but nooooo, the student didn't do that great a job, so the prof had to do most of the work again. And geez, she wasn't much better. >_< GRRR
I think NYU is going downhill. The more I go there, the more it's starting to feel like Stony. They have too many new students, less qualified/younger professors, more paperwork/beauracracy, and too much shifting of clinics every semester. The only thing that has not changed is thier highly visible sanitary practices. *sigh* The bigger the institution, the greater the stupidity it's capable of.
June 19, 2003
I finally saw The Shawshank Redemption, and then Top Gun again... I remember seeing the commercial for SR when it came out, like 9 years ago, when Tim Robbins looks up in the sky as it rains. It's a great movie, which I think shared a similar theme to another more recent 'prison movie'; The Green Mile. In both films, we see bad being punished, and good rewarded. I saw Top Gun again because it never ceases to amaze me how far back actors and actresses go (in filmography at least). Did you know Meg Ryan and Tim Robbins were in Top Gun (1985)? Well, I didn't, for the first 3 times I watched it =) Or maybe I just think they go far back, because 1985 is a long time ago,considering I was 3 at the time.
June 4, 2003
June 4th... That sounds really familiar for some reason... like some important day in history...
June 1, 2003
This rain is really starting to suck.
May 15, 2003
Hmmm, planning to circulate a petition for outdoor and indoor handball courts on campus. With all the handball players in the schl, perhaps we can chip in if need be. I mean, how much can a stupid wall and tape on the ground cost? Maybe we should just hire an outside contractor, and build a court in the ESS parking lot. The schl will never know anyways. Emmm, I think there's room for two courts, on opposite walls in the section of the main gym they wall off for volleyball and badminton. There's also the possibility of using the outdoor bball courts behind the sports complex. They can just build the walls on the edge of the basketball courts, so people can either play basketball or handball.
Pics of indoor handball courts: 1, 2, 3, and technical plans for indoor handball court (2MB PDF)
May 14, 2003
OK, that was intense enough handball to kill Robocop.
May 10, 2003
Hahaha, just finished watching "Iron Chef - NY Battle Part 1". They bought the Iron Chefs over from Japan to do battle with Bobby Flay (Chef and Owner of Mesa Grill) of NYC. Though, the actual battle is in part 2. In part 1, Iron Chefs Japanese (Morimoto and Michiba) took part in the show "Doorknock Dinners", where they go knocking on a random house to see if they can cook dinner for them with whatever food they have in the fridge. It was really interesting as the two Iron Chefs rummaged around the kitchen. The look on Michiba's face upon discovering a half eaten jar of Skippy Peanut Butter was priceless =) Morimoto noted that most of the foods found were frozen, and there were very little fresh ones. "Typical American", haha.. I guess Americans don't usually go to the supermarket everyday. Contrary to what I thought, Morimoto said that frozen intant-foods are actually harder to prepare than fresh ingredients. Obviously we're talking about top-notch gourmet cooking here! It was nice to see the family enjoy the Iron Chef dishes from their own food. One dish was made okinomiyaki-style out of left-over spaghetti, carrots, butter, ground beef, cheese, beaten eggs, and flour (pan-fried, then baked, topped with mayo and dried basil)... it was called "Pan-fried leftovers -Michiba style." Haha, this dish has gotta be the weirdest but down to earth item traditionalist Michiba has created.
Meanwhile, Iron Chefs Kobe (Italian) and Sakai (French) were taken to the CIA (Culinary Institute of America), where they popped in on a Japanese cooking class, and demonstrated making sushi. It was pretty funny watching Kobe make sushi, but of course, he is supposed to be an 'Italian' chef. This was followed by a lecture by Sakai/Kobe on a 'French raw salmon dish with Japanese influence'. They also had an apple peeling contest. Sakai cremed 3 other student chefs. Sakai busted the student next to him for trying to use a peeler instead of a knife. Even funnier, the student proceeded to chop off the apple skin instead peeling it. The result looked like an octagonal prism =P
I think this is my favorite Iron Chef ep. now... it was funny, educational, and even touching. One fan and his family came all the way from Phoenix, AZ for the Morimoto vs. Flay battle. The little kid had a Morimoto costume, watched all the Iron Chef eps, had home videos of make-believe cooking, used his sister as the tester, and felt sad whenever Morimoto lost. *awww* He even brought a gift, a book of Bobby Flay's recipes!! HAHAHA =)
NOTE: An excellent Iron Chef website, www.ironchef.com
May 9, 2003
O boy, I'm down to 50 meal points left. That's $5/day. Yup, I'm screwed. I'm gonna die of starvation just before all my finals on the 19th and 20th.
May 8, 2003
Alright, I guess we can't suck at something we don't like =)
May 7, 2003
Ahhh, a spring night's rain... smells great.
May 6, 2003
So are there any questions about our awesome presentation, besides how we did it?
May 3, 2003
There was some sorta weird Geocities glitch, couldn't edit the page for some reason.
"Wa-tak-shi-no-key-yo-ku-ga-tash-ka-na-ra-ba..." =) Been watching much Iron Chef, which is one of the best TV shows out there. It's fun, educational, and original. I love cooking, for the same reasons... And also, in the words of a mentor, Mr. Wing Lee, "When you cook something for people to eat, it's very intimate."
Which reminds me, my relatives came to visit from Taiwan! This is really a first... it's esp. nice because my grandpa also came too. It's rare that everyone can all hang around each other. Weekend at home gave me a new feeling.. I don't know what it is, but I think it's just that feeling of having family around.
O yes... and another thing... Americans really suck at history.
April 22, 2003
So I was in the shower today, and I thought: I haven't eyelid water bombed in the longest! It's when you let water drip off your eyelid, and it feels like you're a bomber looking down, bombing with drops of water. It works a lot better when you have Lego models on the floor. You know you want to try it now.
April 20, 2003
They need to find less submissive and squeamish dubbers for the female guests on Iron Chef. Are Americans too lazy to read subtitles?
April 14, 2003
OK, that's it.. I gotta stop watching too much Iron Chef. Have to study for that stupid test tomorrow... and it makes school food worse than it already is.
April 13, 2003
Iron Chef Dave had to settle for Kelly Brunch today.
April 11, 2003
Too hyper? Can't sleep? Just watch MSNBC and play some racquetball, with Cliff... nites =)
LATER DURING THE NIGHT: OR, you can watch Catherine Zeta-Jones in Entrapment. Damn she is pretty...
April 10, 2003
I have a feeling this is something 'Lilo' would do... Mr. My-friends-need-to-be-punished. =P
April 9, 2003
Wow, so much work gets done by waking up early... and yes, part of the morning was spent on putting up a new background midi!! (I have 900+ midis) The song is Summer Sunset, by Ryoko Hirosue. I saw her in the French film 'Wasabi', and thought she did an 'ok' job. Then, I found out from a review that she was a singer. I dl'd some of her songs... some of which sound like American teen pop. Generally, I don't like it when singers start acting, or actors start singing; because they usually really suck at one, or both. Well, I don't care, I think Summer Sunset sounds good. It's way too happy, but I think it got to me already =)
I'm still working on the midi of that other song I obsessed with, 'Rasen', by Chihiro Onitsuka. It seriously needs work... I think one of the scales is set off beat with the other two. After I finish Rasen, maybe that Coco Lee MP3 (that rhymes btw), since I am having no luck in finding the midi for 'Ai Shi Na Me Zhen'.
April 8, 2003
Too hyper? Can't sleep? Just watch MSNBC and play some racquetball... nitenites =)
April 3, 2003
I think people who know me realize that nonchalance is my way of dealing w/the rough spots in life. I know that means at times, I won't show as much sympathy or seem to feel as much for the situtation. I'm sorry about that... but if you really know me, then you know that I do care and feel like you do. *sigh* I think my tendency to tolerate things and rely too much on myself makes me this way. It's ironic, because sometimes I wind up hurting the ones that love me, and loving the ones that hurt me...
April 2, 2003
Yesterday was a little thing, and a little day... thanks for both the well wishing and the Dave bashing =) Though, it feels really weird, even weirder than the last one. Kinda feels as if time is more "realistic" now. And I don't have much of it, because I'm beginning to love a life that may take a long time. That probably means I should work some more now hahaha.
Emmm, in 'current events' (wow, this is so 6th grade), I'm sure we're all glued to the television these days, watching the war. It seems to be going smoothly enough. Though I really don't know the credibility of our Defense Department's reports to the public. (They said the Patriots were intercepting Scuds left and right last time when it was barely shooting down anything.) Iraq really doesn't stand a chance against the US in a fight. They're poorly trained, motivated, and equipped. That may not be the case for some specially treated divisions and in urban warfare, but eventually, the US will topple Hussein's gov't.
It's amazing the ability of the US miltary to just kill off a government these days. I mean, there's not much a government can do if it doesn't even control things happening in its own borders. We've always been a country that brings the fight to the opponent, and we've been very fortunate in history that only a few attackers have been able to actually fight us on our soil. 'Real conventional attacks', ones that start wars and put the nation in danger that is, like the War of 1812 and Pearl Harbor. (Terrorists don't count, even though they are a very real threat. In my opinion, they cannot be stopped, but the only way they can "win" is if we let them.) In any event, very few countries can wage wars halfway around the world, and have its population lead normal lives, watching it as if it were Monday night football on TV. We're so lucky that we can. Most countries are right next to their friends and enemies. Take Israel, Taiwan, or South Korea for example. Aircraft can fly over their whole country in a matter of minutes. They're vulnerable to even direct artillery. These disadvantages don't exist for the US, because we're buddies w/Canada and Mexico, and we prevail over them militarily and economically. We also have two oceans as buffers and span 4 time zones.
I hung around an anti-war rally a few days ago at the middle of campus, outside the SAC. People have the right to express their own views. I guess they are trying to be persuasive, but I think the speakers exaggerated some things, like the amount of civilians dying every day and the motives for the war, which they claim is purely for oil. But then again.. that's their view. I think at least partially the reason we're going into Iraq is because of oil. As a matter of fact, companies are signing up right now to help 'rebuild' Iraq after the war. Halliburton is one, of which current VP Cheney was president of before. The US would also be in a position to exert considerable influence over the Middle East after 'setting up' in Iraq. True, we're going into a country w/o substantial proof of violating any int'l decrees. And maybe, it's a family feud, seeing how Hussein's outlasted like half a dozen US presidents, including the previous Bush.
On the other hand, there are arguments to justify why we should go into Iraq. It may help democratic movements in the region, and we'll be more secure with oil as a resource for our future. We'll be liberating the Iraqi people from an oppressive regime... or something along those media hyped lines. We're encountering troops who were issued gas masks and chemical suits. (Now why would they need those if they supposedly ditched their bio-chem programs years ago?) Personally, I think the most important reason is because we should fear Iraq obtaining WMDs, esp. nukes. Hussein could give nukes to terrorists, and have some deniability in the horrific results. (Obviously there are other countries with nukes we should also be very concerned with, like Pakistan, India, N. Korea, and the various Russian Republics. Insurgent factions in unstable governments, and poorly controlled weapon stockpiles, may just mean a nuke or two getting out on the black market.)
*sigh* Well, I think the war is self-explanatory..... you get your own facts, and you either support the war or you don't. War brings out the best and worse in people. I'm sure we can all find some truth in that and learn something from it.
PS: Sorry about the long post, I'm a business/history major =P
March 31, 2003
NOTE: Wilco, not wilsay.
March 28, 2003
I hate the music that plays when they show the news. Especially that mood-setting dramatic war tempo music crap they have on CNN. And what's up with all the flashy graphics and transitions?! Just give us the news dammit. I'd much rather see commercials than video montages or CNN cut scenes. I can't believe how much CNN is starting to suck. MSNBC is getting there too.. but at least they also focus on some business. Geez, CNN and the NY Times are going down the crapper. Everyone should watch BBC. The good ol' Brits are fairly impartial, most the time...
NOTE: Back to media bashing... "Saving Private Lynch?" WTH is up with us?? I can see how it's to fuel the fire of our own image or appreciate sacrifices, but geez.. I'm sorry, but she isn't a hero for being a POW and surviving it, because that's her damn job. I mean, it's undoubtably tough, but it is duty.
March 27, 2003
Haha, third times a charm.
name: David Chang
nicknames: Dave, DC, Speedo
childhood dream: being Batman, a dog, or fighter pilot
birthdate: I'm a fool
nationality: US
location: US
hair color: black
eye color: brown
height: 5'8"
sign: Aries
been on stage?: storyteller, martial arts fan dance, narrator, backstage rigging/lights.. or that scary time I had to hold up the flag in front of the whole school at IS237? (notice how I don't need to act in any of these instances)
-------favorites-------
tv show: Junkyard Wars, Discovery Tuesday, Iron Chef
game: RISK, CS, Falcon 3.0
alcoholic beverage: strawberry daiquiris
food: let's not get into lists here..
color: green and navy blue
smell: spring warmth, gasoline, B&BW waterfall mist
animal: black labrador retriever and peregrine falcon
types of music: anything that sounds good, i can relate to, and enhances my mood
magazines: a lot, which I prefer not to get into.. it's not porn you perv
books: non-fic by Tom Clancy
gum: i've gotten past my winterfresh addiction
milk: O_o
vegetable: potato
fruit: pear, oranges
cartoon: Batman Beyond, MIB
flower: pink carnations and white roses, dammit send me some..
movie: A Beautiful Mind, The Rock, Lilo And Stitch, Gattaca, Batman Beyond - Return of the Joker
day: none
month: none
season: spring, fall, winter, then summer.
phrase: "geez..."
sport: handball, racquetball, walking fast
sport to watch: tennis
article of clothing: my watch
number: 16, for the F-16 Fighting FALCON!!
ice cream flavor: vanilla, mint chocolate chip, maybe pistachio
drink: water, milk, Glaceau vitamin water yellow citrus C+
disney character: Stitch
candy: skittles, snickers
-----me-----
do you wish upon stars: no, wishes don't work like that
do you wish you could be someone else for just one day, who: my dad
who do you love right now: not myself
who do you want to spend the rest of your life with: not myself
how are you today: screw you
if you could change one thing about yourself what would it be: myopia
March 26, 2003
Blizzards and floods may happen, but we're not afraid of water, in any form. "I can make it through the rain."
March 25, 2003
Lately, coming back to Stony after Spring Break has put me in a really weird state. *sigh* All I know is that I don't like it.. and it makes me feel very uncomfortable. It's exactly like that feeling I get when I'm playing a sport, and I'm playing on the maximum level that I feel I can sustain indefinately.
My heart beats fast, and I'm breathing a lot ...but my lungs can't take in as much oxygen or air as I want them to so that I feel as if I'm breathing fully.
Even consciously taking one breath at a time; my lungs just can't seem to expand to their normal 100% size.
I try breathing through my mouth --no luck.
The feeling is getting pretty damn annoying now!
Why can't I breathe fully?!
What the ---- is going on?!! WHY?! Am I doing this to myself?
*sob* I feel as if I am drowning while breathing!
Can I make it? Can this game ever end well?
Will I drown in my tears before it ends?
March 24, 2003
I just remembered that strange Geocities limit, so here's a link to the Jeremy Bloom "late week" poems instead.
March 23, 2003
Day 5 until sunset!! ARG!!! Heh, I had a great time this break... even though nothing really happened, I think it's actually a good thing this time. CMU starts Spring Break this weekend, so I got to meet up w/CHK today for a few hours too. But all good things must come to an end, and I'm going back out to school later at noon. Time to get my 5 midterms back, more work, and campus food. Yay.
March 22, 2003
Stupid rain cut short our Day 4. Hmmm, which reminds me, it is raining bombs in Iraq. Watching explosions in the middle of Baghdad live on TV is really a soul shaking sight. Fortunately, these bombs are capable of a level of accuracy that spares normal civilians from at least some of the historical horrors of war. (In WWII, Allied bombers bombed major European cities, killing tens of thousands of civilians per city. Dresden, Berlin, and Cologne were some of the hardest hit. Even as the Allies aimmed for mostly military targets, the bombs of that era often missed by a mile.) As long as Iraqi civilians stay away from certain buildings and military installations, they will be safe. While the fear they surely are experiencing is unavoidable, at least their deaths are.
The US military has unprecedented capabilities these days. In the 1991 Gulf War, each carrier was able to hit 200 separate targets per day, and slightly less if the weather was bad. Today, that figure has improved to 700, regardless of weather. The US currently has 5 carriers in the theater (with another steaming towards).
We can calculate the intensity of just carrier-based firepower:
(700 targets) X (5 carriers) = 3,500 targets hit per day.
(3,500)/(24 hours) = 145.8 targets hit per hour.
(145.8)/(60 minutes) = 2.4 targets hit per minute.
This means that every 25 seconds, something will explode... and this is sustained throughout an entire day. Add in other sources of bombardment; Air Force aircraft, submarine and surface ship launched cruise missiles.. and it's obvious why they want to call it "shock and awe."
March 21, 2003
No Boring Parts Allowed : 1/3
The movie was a thriller;
I was frozen in my chair;
The city was in ruins -
there was gunfire everywhere;
The rain came down for six straight weeks;
the tanks were mired in mud;
A maniac was loose in town;
the gutters ran with blood.
The hero was in trouble;
he was hanging by a thread.
There were thirty thousand cannons
aimmed directly at his head.
Below him was the heroine,
with nitro at her throat.
Their chances of survival
seemed decidedly remote.
He jumped a measly sixty feet -
somehow the cannons missed him.
He freed the leading lady,
they went off and then she - kissed him?
Time out - hang on - hold up!
By some incredible mischance
The real artistic action flick
Turned into a romance!
It killed the classy things with which
This movie was endowed,
And broke my Number One strict rule:
No boring parts allowed.
-Jeremy Bloom
March 20, 2003
Yea.. Day 3. Haha, nothing distracts me better than a good game of hball. Damn I'll miss these walls when break's over... and the people who entertain them.
Also, is it really necessary to have that many cops on the street corners in Flushing? Supposedly there has been an influx of 40 additional officers at the 109! For some reason, I feel a lot safer seeing National Guardsmen with semi-automatics than NYPD... but I guess the city's doing a pretty good job so far.
March 19, 2003
Tonight I argued with my dad for the first time. I mean, really argued... it got pretty heated fast. I can honestly say that I will tolerate shitloads, but I just couldn't take the constant lecturing anymore... especially seeing how I had shut up and said nothing afterwards. Most times, he pisses himself off by thinking things in a chain of thoughts, with each thought beckoning further thought. And along those lines, that leads to increasing amounts of talking and emotion directed at us. Besides the huge amount of time, I feel the repetitiveness and contant 'explainations of elaborations of explainations' really cutting into the learning that can normally be derived from when he talks. I don't know much about other families, so I'm not totally sure if this constant nagging and repetition is the norm. In the wild case it is the norm, geez it really shouldn't be. Hmmm... my dad actually did the same thing five years ago in Taiwan, snapped and stuff in front of his parents. And he has regretted it. That's no surprise. I feel bad already. Of course I regret it too, but under the circumstances, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. *sigh* We all make mistakes... that's normal.
Supposedly, based upon my dad's accounts, my grandpa is much worse. He'll nag like there's no tomorrow, and just when you think it's all settled, he'll show up for some more. Now I realize that parental influence is usually very strong, and so my grandpa's stuff rubbed off on my dad... but all actions perpetuate and originate from one individual. I know my dad resented the nagging, but he is committing the same mistakes as his dad. These mistakes however, stops here.. with me. We'll see down the line, but I will definately NOT be nagging my kids.
A lot of friends tell me how they just can't take the stuff their parents are dishing out to them on an all too common daily basis. *sigh* The way I see it; the reality is that they are your parents. You must live with that whether you like it or not for the rest of your life... if doesn't matter if your 18 or 55. It will be tough, but we can make it. The one things we can do to make our worlds a better place, is to not repeat past mistakes. No one knows the perfect way to raise kids, but we can do what we think is right based upon our beliefs and experiences. In this case, our experience is that constant bitching does not substantially increase productivity, longevity, brain cells, etc... it only fosters reluctant compliance in hopes of making the nagging cease. I do not think this is the way to lead your life, or any other life.
March 17, 2003
Whew! Day two of handball madness... haha, kind of sore now, but it's worth it. I think colder weather is coming anyways. Grrr... what is with the Spring Break homework?? Hmmm, I'll just do more work so my profs can have fun grading >=) *sigh* I'm actually managing to put up a brighter mood now. I think it's all about spirit and control... but thanks to things like this from Jason that add to it:
Top rules to follow when taking the subway:
5. Let the people off the train first before you enter.
4. Do not push your way into the train when it's crowded! I feel like punching the guy in the back of me that pushes me.
3. Never try to sit in between two people when you know you won't fit! One time this big o'lady comes into the 7 train and sits into the seat without considering how small the seat was. Her magnitude forced me to the very side, and out of my space like jello being squeezed out of its container. Man, she was rude. Didn't even say sorry.
2. When standing on the platform next to the sliding doors waiting for passengers to get out, never cut through. I hate it when people cut through me because they want to get in first.
1. THE MOST CRUCIAL RULE OF ALL! If you're not going to walk up the escalater, then stand to the right. Don't block the freakin traffic!
March 16, 2003
Today was such a nice day. The weather was beautiful... there was a slight breeze and the sun provided a wonderful warmth. It was an awesome day to play handball. I haven't played one-wall handball in so long, not since December I believe. Man, it felt so good! For a few hours, I enjoyed myself in a way I had almost forgotten.
I think it was Han Ching who told me before that he liked any volleying sport... I can totally see why. I feel that way too, and personally, I like a sport where you can influence an opponent's play by the level you play. But not in a confrontational way like basketball. With a volleying type sport, you're competing with both yourself and your opponent. Haha, it gives you an opportunity to go for the farthest thing good on the court, and then... you know just how much you can still go. I had a lot of fun at the courts today, thanks guys. *sigh* I love handball =)
March 15, 2003
Recently, the US Air Force tested a 21,000 lb. bomb, the Massive Ordnance Aerial Burst (MOAB). Though only 18,000 pounds is actual explosive, it's about 20% bigger than the 15,000 lb. 'Daisy Cutter' bomb we used in Afghanistan, Iraq, and Vietnam. These bombs destroy everything in a radius of several football fields and cause shockwave effects on objects otherwise further. The explosion sucks up all air from the area, including right out of peoples' lungs. The compression wave effect was what we desired in Afghanistan; to collapse caves and literally squeeze occupants to death by air pressure. The psychological impact of these bombs is also high, they make a pretty big bang and decent dust plume, and can wipe out an entire battalion of troops (~550 people). Daisy Cutters were also used in Vietnam to create 'instant helicopter landing sites' from the dense jungle. Even so, these are not the biggest bombs we have ever made... the British actually dropped 22,000 pound bombs on Germany in WWII (thankfully only on railroad yards and U-boat pens), and the US made a 43,000 lb. one, but never used it in war.
The point is that, these bombs are very big. The new MOAB, or as some people like to call, "Mother Of All Bombs", packs 9 tons of high explosive. BUT, as big as they are, the media is dead wrong when they say the blast energy is "like that of a small nuclear weapon." Because it isn't. The smallest nuclear bomb in US arsenal has a yield of 1-kiloton (equivalent of 2,000,000 pounds of TNT). That means the MOAB isn't even 1% of the explosive power of the smallest nuke in US arsenal. We have nukes that yield in the dozens of MEGA-tons. So while it is true that the MOAB and cousins are the largest conventional/non-nuclear bombs ever, they cannot compare to nuclear weapons. THIS IS THE REASON WHY I FEAR TERRORISTS GETTING THEIR HANDS ON A NUKE. The moment terrorists get a nuke, the world has just suddenly become a much, much, much more dangerous place. Terrorists are not people who get nuclear weapons to deter aggression, terrorists are people who want nuclear weapons because they will USE them to inflict maximum harm. I think that aside from survivors of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, a nuclear blast set off somewhere crowded is pretty much unimaginable to people these days. The damage, losses, and suffering would be more than catastrophic. Maybe there's no excuse for the insensitivity of this thought, but we should all be aware that such a nuclear blast will make the WTC look like a small event in comparison. Consequentially, this is one of the few good reasons I see in the US invading Iraq. Because once Iraq obtains nuclear weapons, it is highly likely terrorists will.
March 14, 2003
An interesting thought was shown to me when I read this article on recent activities of European anti-Americanism: Could it be that these anti-US feelings are a "projection of Europe's own record of avarice-driven imperialism upon the US, refusing to consider that America has ever acted out of even partially idealistic motives"??? Max Boot, a fellow at the Council of Foreign Relations concludes that, "In the case of Iraq, Europeans just can't accept that we might be acting for, say, the general safety and security of the world." Perhaps.. Europeans just don't like to admit that they took imperialistic stances before, expanding their empires for power and wealth. They don't want to support the US in its efforts because that would be saying that they were wrong and morally inferior in their imperialism. Boot's sentiment is strongly pro-American, but it could be a reason, and illustrates how people may think psychologically. It makes me feel sorry for our men and women in the military, when they say that other people just don't understand that we also fight for people who cannot defend and fight for themselves...
March 12, 2003
The Recording Industry Association of America..... a big lumbering organization that is slow to adapt to the times. It's taking them years to develop not even decent pay-per-tune internet sites. In my opinion, the RIAA and record companies deserve the loss of revenues due to piracy and low sales on CDs. Growing up, I witnessed how they've gradually upped the effort to rip us off. I see more and more 2-song albums, and the disappearance of singles CDs. Album prices are $20 these days, while the cost of manufacturing a CD is like 21-cents. I love it when companies point to advertising costs to justify increased product prices. Maybe they're just trying to make us buy things we don't want, and charging us the tab. (Though maybe I should keep my mouth shut about that when I make commercials...)
Also, I believe that any sort of audio or video transmission can be pirated. Data transmissions can only be prevented from being pirated if it is encrypted straight from the source and at the time of recording, and sent to the end user, who possesses the proper decryption key to view/listen to the data. Though I'm not sure, I think that this strict hardware setup is the only way data can be kept secure. In real life, there's usually an interval where the data isn't encrypted and thus, can be intercepted, siphoned off, and recorded. Take television for example: Suppose we want to film something that we only want certain people to see.. and of course, we don't want other people distributing it! A camcorder records the action, which is encoded and encrypted digitally in the camcorder by the chips and stuff in it. This information is sent to a studio, which can broadcast it by air or wires. It doesn't matter what the medium is, because this transmission is encrypted. When the transmission reaches the target viewer, the view uses their TV to view it. They can do this because their TV must have a decoder chip to decrypt the transmission. From this step onwards, is the part where piracy can take place. Up to this point, data movement has been secure. But then, what if you plug in your headphones to the TV? Is the audio data going out of the audio jack on the TV to the little speakers in your headphones secure or encrypted? No, it's raw electricity and comes out as perfectly fine audio. This headphone wire... is where we can come in and intercept the supposedly secure transmission, and record it >=) The same idea applies to virtually everything, like if you have an encrypted DVD playing on your computer.. you can record it simply by intercepting the video out port from the video card. There is simply no way to stop this kind of data interception and recording. After the deed is done, there's only the simple matter of posting it on the web or Kazaa, and voila... another little file that ticks off the RIAA.
March 11, 2003
I saw this program on North Korea the other day. It appeared to be one of the rare instances the Democratic People's Republic of Korea lets foreign journalists into the country. We were taken across N. Korea, into its capital Pyongyang, and various institutional buildings. Most of N. Korea was in shades of gray, there was little or no color. Things that did have color had that faded look. The most colorful things, appeared to be government traffic signs. This impression of colornessless was supposedly remarked upon by former Sec. of State Albright when she visited N. Korea. She observed how there was an absence of color until she got to the main stadium in the capital, where the rainbow of colors were overwhelming. They showed a clip of the welcome event in the stadium and the shows, festivities, and 'audience card imagery' (where individual people spell out or display big images by flipping posters as a group) was stunning. I got the powerful feeling that the precision and expense testified to the strict discipline and will of the DPRK government.
A guide was attached to the press group at all times. She explained the places and things we saw, and generally 'represented' the DPRK. I didn't see any other official of substantial rank around. The guide wore full military dress uniform, and spoke decent English. I learned a lot from her behavior to press group, and how conditions in N. Korea really are. The guide and people the journalists spoke to were oblivious to the real conditions of the outside world. They simply did not know how other people saw them. Authoritarian governments want to control all aspects of peoples' lives, but I was surprised at the completeness and permeation of their efforts. They genuinely believed that their country and government ran well compared to others, and didn't think the outside world was any better, much less to be jealous of. The guide steered clear of any political questions asked, and instead declared that she hoped they could just appreciate the achievements made by the North Korean people during the tour. Haha... I must admit I admire her masterful handling of that potential point of western interest. Not to mention, her final comment was a reply to a journalist's question on what part of the tour she enjoyed most: Spending time with the questioner. =O
We sure are lucky when we live in the most democratic country in the world. (Or is that the Uncle Sam brainwashing kicking in??)
March 10, 2003
People always want the unattainable, and they're willing to sacrifice what they already have to get it. *sigh* Maybe we need distractions to keep us happy. Something to laugh about, something to feel good about... but then you realize, you actually just want something to go for. You can't go through life not liking the majority of your days. I know I won't.
March 9, 2003
East-West Parallel 2003 : J&D
I've always felt so connected to you because I see me in you making me want to protect, comfort and envelop you yet run away and hide from you.
If you can get over all the pain, I can as well...
Looking back, our focus was wrong.
It's not about blaming the other person or looking for replacements or running away.
We'll only be trapped in a belly of bitterness and loneliness denying ourselves the love that's awaiting us upon rebirth.
Are you satisfied with those brief slips of pleasure?
I'm really scared to seek you now because I fear probing my own pandora box.
You are the most beautiful person to me.
You are leaving soon and I'm letting you go.
-Eclipze
You know, I truly, deeply wanted us to be happy together.. but I suppose the next best thing is for us to be happy separately.
-Aya16CE
March 8, 2003
Yea... so I DID go home. Alright, not really.. just met up with CHK and ate brunch. Maybe the next time I really go home, I'll just pop by unannounced like always =) Anyways, it was great to catch up on things since winter break. Though we were both so dead tired, we spent an hour just sitting in the hotel lobby relaxing. BLAH.....
geez... ok then, I will get some rest.. x_x
LATER IN THE DAY: Made available previous background music I've had on these post pages through the years. It's interesting how far back these pages go. haha, the 5-year anniversary of 'nude' is coming up... Yikes =)
March 7, 2003
Yes, I'm going home today. I don't care if it's only one week before spring break or two midterms and a presentation... I need to see some people. Haha, maybe even get to pay Sandy back for the peeler. *sigh* Been thinking a lot about my GADPs, maybe I'll post on it over break. Yet another emotionally draining post coming?
O yea... >_<
LATER IN THE DAY: OK, not going home anymore. That's twice now. Parents telling me to study instead. Geez, wilco...
March 6, 2003
*sigh* It's snowing outside... what a great way to top off a long night... Despite my appearances and the people I've talked with, last night/this morning was real shitty. I felt so "little"... Hmmm, It's almost as if the snow percipitated the dream I had. Pretty damn weird.
Ugh.. It's hot and dry in the room and I'm biting my lip... think there's a scar now. F---
March 5, 2003
Wow, it's been a good while since I've enjoyed watching a movie, but I watched all three 'Back To The Futures' this week... it brings back such good memories of when I was in elementary school =) It's interesting how I see little bits and pieces of the movie I didn't notice before now. Probably because when you watch something a couple times, your eyes starts to wander, and you can think more freely.. or maybe I was just too young.
Anyways, I finally realized how the urge to not back down when confronted (you know, when anyone calls Marty a 'chicken') was such a main theme in all three parts. It's such a perfect flaw for Marty's character too! I mean, it gives us viewers something we can relate to, and advances the story conveniently. EX: Marty's inability to cope with the 'chicken threat' gets him into plot advancing trouble like in Part I's cafe when Biff sees Martin McFly (Marty's dad) trying to woo Lorraine (Marty's mom). The outcome of this scene makes Lorraine even more attracted to Marty. (which is absolutely hilarious..)
Also interesting, is how through the three movies, Marty's gradually overcomes his urge to stand his ground. Though an admirable trait, maybe the movie makers wanted the audience to know that sometimes we must be practical, as in the scene of Part III, with Bufford Tannen and the gun duel. In this case, Marty finally refuses to give in to being called a chicken, even though he does settle it later, 'man-to-man'. Eventually, at the end of Part III, we see Marty completely overcoming his insecurity (i'll explain soon) when he decides not to race his pickup with another at the traffic light.
Marty's 'flaw' is even more closely integrated into the movie than I had thought, when I realized that perhaps it was because his father was such a wimp in the very beginning of Part I. I think this disapproval of his father's weakness probably manifested itself in Marty, so that he was insecure. Marty felt the need to prove that he was not a chicken, and would stand up to others. In the end, it's great to see 'the good guys come out on top' after everything. Though I like the Part I of Back To The Future best, I think Spielberg did an extraordinary job in picking the cast, and maintaining continuity/themes in the 'Back To The Futures'.
March 1, 2003
Grrr, forget it. It's hopeless, no one knows what the hell that song was.. hahaha *sigh* Well, here's one called 'Seasons', which I can relate to with so much... I had quite an obsession with this before, and for some reason these days, I've been listening to it along with 'Rasen' for hours on end =) You can access all my MP3s via my AIM sn.
February 27, 2003
Hahaha, someone pointed out that the biggest paragraph in yesterday's post was about my bikes =P
February 26, 2003
Yea, this is sort of a rant, but i guess not entirely..... It seems like it's just me, and I hope I don't fall into hypocrisy along my rant... but I don't like how people are "dependent" on others. There's nothing wrong with being dependent, but some people are dependent in a way that makes them selfish and lazy in my view. I don't know why I feel this way, but I'm pretty sure it has to do with the way I grew up.
My parents, especially my dad, didn't get much help from their parents. My mom's dad died when she was 11, and she had three older brothers in the family. My dad is the youngest of five brothers. It's not a stretch to see that my grandparents didn't pay too much attention to my parents' lives. Of course it doesn't mean they don't care, or that they didn't do a good job.. it just means that perhaps in a quantative time measurement, my parents' did not have a lot of parental supervision. As I've said, this isn't really a bad thing... seeing how my parents are extremely honorable people who were certainly not delinquents back then because of this lack of parental supervision.
This lack of attention however, probably influenced me more than my parents. My dad reminds me, way too much btw, saying that if he got the constant nagging he was giving me, he would be better off today. (I consider this an opinion of course.) The fact is that my parents had to tend to themselves most of the time when they were growing up. Their parents were practically only there to teach and care for them by way of example and sporadic admonishments. It seems to me that my parents learned more hands-on things from their siblings more than their parents. There's some good things about being independent, since you can do everything yourself and not rely on anyone. In any case, I think this growing environment made my parents somewhat independent, but also, when I think about it, uninformed about some things and harder for them to be particularly divergent and inquisitive in their thinking. (This point is actually much too lengthy for me to divulge in now... so maybe some other time...)
How exactly does this affect me? Well, directly, my parents will tend to make me do things by myself and point out that they had to learn almost everything by themselves... Sometimes, they will criticize me while I am in the process of learning or doing something. The situation may be something as simple as tie the newspapers for recycling, or something bigger in the scheme of things, like how I approach strangers or going into a relationship. If my parents have already taught me to do that something, then the lecturing/criticism/teaching will inevitably be more intense and prolonged.
Basically, my parents, especially my dad, expect my sister and I to learn quickly from their teachings and example. I haven't asked any one to see if they share the same experience, but I haven't heard of anyone being lectured for not actually doing anything wrong. For example, recently, my mom went to visit relatives and friends in Taiwan. I went home for the weekend from Stony, and my sister was tasked to make pizza for us on a skillet. (Yea, our oven is busted.) When it became apparent that she didn't really know the cooking sequence (you have to microwave defrost first, put some extra veggies on the already 'supreme' pie, etc...), my dad lectured her... saying how she
should've known how to do everything because we've made pizza like this for almost a dozen times already.
This is the environment we grew up in. And I believe that as the first-born child, I was particularly object and subject to these influences and lifestyle. I think this explains the reason why I refuse or avoid to rely on anybody. Whether it's homework or learning how to ride a bike, I generally don't like asking for help or advice. In most cases, I'd rather take the hit on my grades, or the cuts and bruises... In my view, I feel that if I didn't make the effort to work on the assignment enough to do a good job, then I should be man enough to take the consequences. Even at the age of 7, I would try to mount my neighbor's adult speed bike using a tree/fence, and push off from there. To me, the pain was worth the feeling of satisfaction and sense of independence as I finally found freedom on a bike. It's a feeling I enjoy to this day, maybe because it's one of the few things I can call my own. "My own", because nobody has taught me anything about bikes from when I first laid my eyes on one. Since then, I've had 5 bikes, including my "first", which was a gift from someone. It didn't matter that the "first" was already as used as a take-out delivery bike.
Going off topic, It's interesting to see how much I cherish (and am truly spoiled about) having a bike. (For clarity, the five bikes I have owned are referred to sequentially as "first", "second", "third", etc...) Heh, I rode my "first" bike so much, my parents had a lock on it to prevent ~me~ from using it... *sigh* Both my "2nd" and "3rd" were stolen by a groups of older kids when I was in 6th grade. My dad had warned me about biking alone (the "2nd bike" robbery), or in remote places (my "3rd bike" robbery... actually I was with Chuing, and we both had our identical bikes seized)... so I obviously didn't listen. After the loss of my "second bike", my dad said that he wouldn't buy me another. I could understand his refusal, because I didn't listen to him. But being a kid then, I cried sometime after because I still wanted to have a bike really bad (almost as bad as wanting a dog, but we just simply couldn't accommodate that)... and so my dad bought me my "third bike". After ~that~ was taken from me by force, I didn't mention wanting a bike until junior year HS, five years later. I really didn't like forking over $1.25/1.50 to the MTA to go places.. and I was in Bayside, while my friends were in Flushing... so CHK, WINs, and I all bought new bikes. That one, which is my "fourth", took a bit of pleading. But I still got it on the grounds that I was older, more responsible, and of the age/physique to be "jacking other peoples' bikes, rather than having my own robbed". Unfortunately, shortly after riding my "fourth" for a while, I ran over an 18" wide steel rimmed storm drain missing its covering grate at high speed. I pulled up the front wheel in time and got my ass off the seat, but couldn't prevent the rear wheel from impact and suffering a huge dent to the rim. (damn that Star Nissan dealership, maintain your premises!!!) With my "fourth" bike out of action, I was pissed, and again, pressing for another bike. My dad, seeing how badly I wanted a functional bike, bought me yet another one, my "fifth" and current bike, which is again, identical to CHK's =) Though, it wasn't the end of my "fourth" bike, because my dad hammered out the huge dent out of the rim, replaced the inner tube, and polished the rim facing the brake lining all by himself... haha, I suppose he does have more bike experience than me, seeing how he biked, mostly for transportation, since he was a kid and through everything including grad school. So now I have two (the "4th" and "5th") working bikes. My lifelong bike experience started with myself, but I admit the availability of my bikes were mostly not of my own. It's truly a parents' love that provided for my bikes, and it makes me sadly happy every time I think of it...
OK then, back to the *ahem* MAIN TOPIC... now, a little over a month from my 21st bday, I think I'm still that same kid. The one who doesn't hand in homework sometimes just because he's stupid or lazy and wouldn't ask a friend to cover. The one who would never think of asking his parents to teach him anything, not even learning how to ride a bike. The one who borrowed money for the first time in 7th grade and felt so bad over it that he insisted his stapler as collateral. I think that being like this is the byproduct of my upbringing. Perhaps it allows me to feel more in control, less vulnerable of being hurt by other peoples' failures, more secure of my future... and I just cannot see/relate to how others are willing to depend on others for unnecessary/trivial matters. It's possible that I feel that being independent is a way to make my parents stop pestering me so much, or even a way I can rein in my feelings. The other day, I was persuaded to attend a Health Sciences Center seminar for Asian-American health. The speaker pointed out many of the values for Asian cultures versus western one. Like, how Asians value tradition, formality, modesty, and 'indirectness and subtlety', while Occidental/Westerners value change, informality, self-confidence, and 'directness and openness'. I am practically born in the US, but my parents were not... so this could explain why I think this way, because I still grew up in an Asian-American household, and my parents' values are undoubtedly influential and, I suppose, rubbed off on me. Probably not the main reason, but I do feel reserved, along with those typical Asian values, so that I don't bother to ask for anything.
While I think this is generally fine... it does make me feel reluctant, and also, selfish in a way, when I assist others if they ask for things I think stem out of their own selfishness and/or laziness. Sometimes, we have no choice but to depend and rely on others for support or help. It's those times when we don't have to, but still turn towards other people that I disapprove of.
February 20, 2003
Haha... 'The Switch' (which I finally found out is aka: Stealing Dragon, Exchanging Phoenix) IS JUST TOO FUNNY =) It's about these babies switched at birth so that the boy one becomes emperor. The plot is decent and there's a fair amount of action. It's ripping Ranma, Rurouni Kenshin, and even even Crimson Tide BGMs like crazy, but I think I got used to it. I love the opening clip and music, hahaha =P
BTW, does anyone know what's the song currently playing? no one's knows...
February 19, 2003
NOTE: I started this post in DaveLieu's room watching the Superbowl. (Yes, I've been working on this thing for a while now) Paragraphs were deleted or condensed because they no longer applied and whatevers. They were mostly about the processes I went through for housing and the $2,028.77 the U. owes me. Ehhh, nothing too important. So anyways, I'm going to finish this post now:
At first, I welcomed the start of school, returning to Stony to continue higher education. I worked long and hard to come back, and had a great momentum going. But now, I'm not feeling so great about the thought anymore. Everything I do, everywhere I go, every time I stare at the speckle spackled ceiling..... I'm reminded about the past... Why can't I leave the past behind? It seems that every single aspect of Stony just hurts me because the last time I was here doing anything..... I was happy. The last time I was here truly feels like a short time ago, and also, a long time ago. Everything is so fresh in my memory, and yet, right now, nothing could be put me further from the past.
I don't even know what the hell to say anymore.. I'm trying to step back and take a look at the big picture.. but I don't like the big picture. Because I see reality in things I can't change, things I don't like, and things I never thought I'd come to hate as I step back and look at the big picture. Ahh yes, and if you're reading this and still clueless about my situation, then either you don't know me, or you shouldn't. Stop reading now if you feel like you don't want to. Don't be thinking about reading on just for the sake of curiosity or the fact that you'll know more. It won't do us any good if you do.
*sigh* I feel... tired, and distant. Yea, definitely.. distant from myself, and things I to believe in. The past year was full of happiness and progress. Everything can't be totally happy, but it was actually pretty close to being so; that's why I say 'progress'. I loved a girl with everything I had. Up to now, I think I've only just expressed vaguely my involvements, so this would be the first time I have ever posted blatantly about a relationship of mine. I know she loved me back with everything she had too. But in the end, her love wasn't enough. It was not enough for the both of us.. not enough for her, and now I'm beginning to feel... not enough for me.
I recently read that it's best for people to not concentrate/focus/center their life on something "tangible". For example, people can be family-centered, spouse-centered, money-centered, rivalry-centered, etc... But what happens when these centers or 'meanings of life' are taken away, destroyed, or made irrelevant? What would be the point of life then? Supposedly, it is most ideal to base our lives on principles, which we believe in and act upon. Principles like being productive, honor, being forgiving, knowing stealing is wrong, being responsible to our planet..... you get the point. Principles can be almost anything I guess.
As most can figure... Anne and I broke up in mid-November. I have been sitting on the floor ever since. I'd be flat on my back, but my quivering ab muscles, representing the remaining character I have left, keep me from being sprawled across the ground. *sigh* Some say she was my 'first love'. (Though I think dogs were my first love.) We did about everything together for nearly a year, lived in the same room at Stony, and talked on the phone like it was our religion or something. Anne and I were really close. Geez, I felt like I was married. No joke. Though, maybe by reflecting like this, allows me to realize how far I've fallen. I talked about principles a few lines back. Well, I realize now that I was a 'significant other-centered' person for a duration. One of my most treasured centers left, and all the painful thought about how much love I gave until I could give no more.. won't help me now. Trying to adhere to my principles, thinking out of love, and trying to shape my world.. I have continued to feel as I have felt before, and tried to revive our affections. Unfortunately, that didn't work out, and an emerging reality is that, most likely... our relationship is forever changed, I will recover from this eventually, we may not even be friends, I will look back upon this in the future, etc etc etc... To be clear, I do not like any of these scenarios. But dammit, this is how it's headed.
So, now what? My best friend suggests work. "Drive myself into the ground with it." I could drown my troubles in food, or play video games and immerse myself in a virtual world. Sometimes when I think too much, I tell myself, "Just shut up and forget about it." Others have suggested 'the remedy of another girl.' I don't think any of these options are real solutions. I guess there is nothing tangible I can derive from anything here, except to learn, add to my experiences, and eventually love again? Yes, that is a question, because just because I believe in it, doesn't necessarily mean it'll be answered... Besides, I know the last thing Anne would want is for me to become bitter, cynical, and pessimistic... Hmmm, what's there to learn? Well, for example, forgetting about the backdrop, let's think about friendship..... In an attempt to rekindle our relationship, I visited Anne where she worked late night shifts patrolling campus over winter break. Chuing was with me as I walked around Flushing, buying food, drinks, and snacks she liked. I don't think CHK approved of my plan to surprise visit her, but then when he saw my mind set, he gladly helped in my pursuit. That night, I took the train to Stony and got there at 10PM. It was 30º, windy, and sleeting somewhat. Haha... of course, since it was an announced visit, Anne was surprised. We talked for an hour something. But, I was not successful, not to mention I also had nowhere to stay that night (since I was supposedly at a sleepover, haha). My continued presence at Stony while Anne was at work made me feel as a liability, increased tensions, etc... So I left. After what seemed like the longest train ride in my life, I got to the Jamaica LIRR station at 1:30AM. CHK picked me up there and we drove to the Pathmark parking lot in Whitestone. We talked and hobo'd in the car and vicinity all night 'til morning. Starting from the train ride from Stony Brook, I already started feeling ashamed. It hit me how I had never done anything quite as dramatic for CHK... while my best friend had tagged along with me all day, I was so eager to please Anne and myself. That cold night, CHK was motivated by our long friendship. I, on the other hand, was driven by my selfishness and love. Wow, it's pretty easy to lose yourself when you love someone.
OK then. Even though I want to write more (it would certainly be therapeutic), I'm going to end my post at this. I'm not going to continue, because the situation is complicated, and I'm obligated myself to exercise discretion as well. I'll close with a poem written by a friend of a friend..I think I still feel this way, but I will be more conscious with my thoughts now. I cannot afford to lose my focus in the big picture. In a way, love cannot be my center.. but the principle of it can.
Poem about love:
Love is like a tree thrown into the sea
At first it is strange
And then it goes up and down
Sometimes it will look like it will sink
But it is not its nature to do so.
Eventually it will calm, float and be at peace
-warthur
February 17, 2003
Geez, schl bites. Yea I haven't been posting much for a while. Emmm, I don't really have an excuse, since it's not that I don't have the time. Just didn't want to. In a way, maybe this site itself is beginning to make me feel uncomfortable. *sigh* Anyways, I've been working on a post.. which is taking a lot out of me. Though, I'll be finishing it soon. Yea, finished.....
and Happy Bday to DaveLee...
February 10, 2003
Forget it. No. Forget it. Maybe. Forget it. ...
February 1, 2003
The tragic lost of space shuttle Columbia highlights the contributions of members in society, and the inherent dangers of space travel and research. NASA's best leads point to left wing tile failures. The thousands of ceramic tiles covering the surface of space shuttles withstand over 3,000º upon reentry, caused by air friction as the shuttle is going at around 12,000mph. I doubt it's terrorism, though it's still early to tell.
These astronauts died doing their jobs, for which they both loved and believed in. It makes me think about why I wanted to attend Naval Academy, and why I think these astronauts did not regard a single day of their careers as 'work'. Supposedly a famous Chinese philosopher said, "Pick a job you enjoy, and you won't work for a day in your life."
January 31, 2003
Happy Chinese New Year.. supposedly a time to reflect on our lives, what lies before us.. and what has happened. Currently, I am in a state of constant reflection..... it's been you know... fun.. ok maybe not. I'll write more on this and the 'act of reflection' laters.
January 24, 2003
For a limited audience: you'll have to word-wrap this yourself. (Revised March, 2003)
January 19, 2003
So you've figured out that this page does exist. Good for you, now pat yourself on the back and go away..
January 1, 2003
Hopefully it's a good sign that Forest Law started out this year fists flying..
(Most recent messeges on top)
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