December 31, 2002
I wanted to post on Christmas, but i just didn't get around to doing it. Even though it was on my mind a lot, i agonized over it all day until at last i stared at my watch's little LCD screen counting down the final minutes. I felt kind of guilty for not posting, but... what the hell. It's really nothing... since this is my personal page, i am in complete control of the content; i can easily set post dates to display any day i want... and nobody would know when i had truly posted. Of course, i can't lie to myself had i done that. I've only modified dates a few instances because of the common "midnight am/pm" conlict anyways. Posting both the date and time fell out of habit very soon after started to treat NewUD seriously. I think having no time makes my posts somewhat more vague, private, and mysterious.
Posting here is another thing. This isn't Xanga or some other commercial weblog site, so there is minimal through-traffic. Other than a few people, or people looking at my AIM profile, i don't think anyone knows about this place. Over the past several years, i've become increasingly aware of how private my posts have been getting. When i first created my website, this section was just to write about what i was doing, and what new things were up on the site. This gradually changed however, to how i was doing, and what thoughts i had. I began to feel as if i was infringing upon my own privacy. I thought of creating a separate journal for my eyes only before... but i think i got lazy.. and selfish too i guess. Sometimes i post because i really need an outlet, an outlet in which i know may reciprocate something.
Like a fighter jet executing a 'Split-S', i feel like i'm twisting and turning... continuing in the same direction... winding up at a lower altitude. Perhaps it should be a wakeup call to myself that during a dogfight, it's usually a pilot who is disengaging that would perform such a manuever.
December 30, 2002
I want a dog so bad.
December 21, 2002
Do you sometimes find yourself feeling great, but then you think of something bad... but then go right back to being happy again, wondering why the hell you were thinking about bad stuff like that?
Do you sometimes find yourself feeling down, and then something nice happens, and you feel good... only until the next moment, and then you feel as if it just didn't feel right feeling good and you go back to feeling bad?
@_@
December 15, 2002
Hmm, first time i have ever put up lyrics on my website. I guess it was pretty damn cynical of me when i thought people just put it up when they had nothing better to say =T
--by Donna Lewis and Richard Marx
We were strangers, starting out on a journey
Never dreaming, what we'd have to go through
Now here we are, I'm suddenly standing
At the beginning with you
No one told me, I was going to find you
Unexpected, what you did to my heart
When I lost hope
You were there to remind me
This is the start
And life is a road and I wanna keep goin'
Love is a river I wanna keep flowin'
Life is a road now and forever wonderful journey
I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I want to be standing
At the beginning with you
We were strangers, on a crazy adventure
Never dreaming, how our dreams would come true
Now here we stand, unafraid of the future
At the beginning with you
And life is a road and I wanna keep goin'
Love is a river I wanna keep flowin'
Life is a road now and forever wonderful journey I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I want to be standing
At the beginning with you
Knew there was somebody somewhere
I need love in the dark
Now I know my dream will live on
I've been waiting so long
Nothing is going to tear us apart
And life is a road and I wanna keep goin'
Love is a river I wanna keep flowin'
Life is a road now and forever wonderful journey
I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I want to be standing
At the beginning with you
Life is a road and I wanna keep goin'
Love is a river I wanna keep flowin' on
Starting out on a journey
And life is a road and I wanna keep goin'
Love is a river I wanna keep flowin'
In the end I want to be standing
At the beginning
With you
December 9, 2002
oi it's cold, and it's going to get colder... haha, the angels are descending down upon Buffalo... i'll be coming back probably on the 22nd. Good time to unwind, spend some quality angel time, build a few bridges, play some Forrest Law, watch Romance? =P Til then, finals and xfer stuff to do. Housing will also be a major pain. Though Stony still wants official transcripts, i got 4/5 of my professors to write nice things about me, so everything should make my case a no brainer to the Stony panel... and i'm getting an A for the prof that declined anyways =)
Think we may be having a transit worker strike soon. Don't know if they'll issue a court order making them work. It's gonna cost the city a shitload of money if they strike, like a quarter of a years retail sales are done these few weeks. Blah, no Q3 to the airport?
December 5, 2002
Last day of classes... snow... 5.5 hour commute... hmm, suddenly i don't feel like posting anymore. haha, sorry.. But it's not because of a bad reason... i just don't want to post right now. Besides, lots of studying and stuff to do before the end of next week...
December 3, 2002
The year is finally reaching its conclusion... shitty timing, but at least i can start another post year and not have to see some of the past. Besides, i think i may be approaching that quirky Geocities limit on how much HTML txt you can have... *sigh* another year, one more time around the sun... it's funny, i never noticed the uplifting spirit of holidays before. It was always like, o thxgiving; ok. Christmas, ok. New Years; ok. But now, these holidays are contributing bit by bit to make me whole again. I suppose when ppl are down and out, is when they can see things more clearly.
haha, so a lot of people have been copying my profile... or at least parts of it. No one seems to like duty or honor as much though. Damn that blinding light of love eh. I was reading some stuff on the Roman Republic when I came across the word 'passion', which apparently comes from the Latin word 'passio', or 'suffering'... o wells.. no surprise.
December 1, 2002
Ugh... KFC chicken... never again... why o why did i decide to eat it...
November 30, 2002
*sigh* 'The giant oak is the acorn that stood its ground.' so they say... emm, i suppose it does takes a strong one to think of these quotes when you're down.
geez, i hate this. grrr... i can't listen to most of my music now... it's just too depressing... again, i'm painfully reminded why there are times when i just don't like listening to any songs with lyrics. GRRRRR... dammit... >=(
November 28, 2002
*sigh*" I love you guys"... though i promised myself i would say it by the third time we errr- flipped over the meat baton, i was afraid that i'd start crying, and i didn't want to there in front of other people. But... today, i felt as if i was transported back to 10th grade.. when i didn't have any worries, and everything was going great. I always reminisce about soph year... i almost feel guilty about doing it so much. But i do it because it was so good. Thanks to you guys. *sigh* Who could forget midnight 'Flush treks' on our bikes? Back-to-back R6 while WINs was sleeping? Risk until CHK threatened tatoos? Steak and deep fried shrimp at 3am? Hmmm... i suppose dorming together was a bad idea.
=T but, we're still young... besides, geezers don't die, they simply become angels... we'll do a lot of stupid things, and we'll do a lot of cool things... but i don't know any other people i would rather be doing things with <=)
Since this summer... after enduring so many difficulties and making mistakes, i painfully realized that everything i do, and everything that i'm supposed to do has reasons and consequences... and that also, breaking my own promises were the most painful of all..... i guess that was one of the reasons i didn't wanna say about me getting back in shape; though i said i would, i put it off for a while. emmm anyways, here's something i found in my good friend DG's AIM profile... i think he may have gotten it from a song or something. It's pretty interesting if you think about each segment separately for a while, and think about them each in the form of a question:
The Warriors Reminder
i am awake-my mind is free-i am creative-i love myself-my willpower is strong-i am brave-i practice patience-i don't judge folks-i give, not to receive-i don't expect-i accept-i listen more than i talk-i know i'll change-i know you'll change-i'll hold on one more day-i start over when necessary-i create my own situations-i am cosmic-i do not have the answers-i desire to learn-i am the plan-i am strong-i am weak-i want to grow-i know i will-i take on responsibility-i hide myself from no one-i'm on my path-warriors walk alone-i won't let my focus change-taking out the demons in my range .
I hope everyone finds some renewed spirit in themselves to plow on... the semester's winding down guys.. 'let's rock'.
O yes, Happy Thanksgiving... esp. to that f*cker who charged us for the cake... grrr, why didn't i say something?? sorry, still dwelling on it =T
November 24, 2002
*shrug* fighting bouts of apathy lately... and i really hate to.. because i do care.... *sigh*
ummm also, i want to say thanks to the people who are helping Anne... makes me wanna have geges' and chickies of my own...... i am just playing.. =T seriously, thanks.
November 21, 2002
*sigh* the semester has turned really ugly... and it's not the schl work. Ummm... it took a while for me to come back here to post, even though i thought of it several times.. it's just too painful and muddy even catching a glimpse of my past posts... if you don't know what i'm talking about, sorry, i suppose you just don't know what i'm talking about.
GRRR.. I'm not going to rant.... because i'm too worn out to... things have been happening so fast and so many damn thoughts are running through my head these days that sometimes i need to consciously breathe. I want to thank the people who have been here for me... all my friends, and esp. CHK and the angels... you've all been really helpful. I agree 'angel time' has been too long overdue, and we'll make that better soon. *sigh*
GZGZ...... wo yie sad... lonely... and sorry.
November 13, 2002
haha, a pre-dinner weight of 179... *sigh* tho it sucks that studying and working out is about the few things i can do here... the weather's turning damp and chilly.. jus a couple more weeks ^.^
November 8, 2002
Yeesh... didn't really have a great week. It was OK, but certain things really killed it. Got a law test Monday too... i did however get to go to the Metropolitan Museum of Art yesterday tho. Haven't gone there since junior high... and it felt really exciting this time. It may b age or new knowledge or appreciation of art, but it was really exciting. Seeing up close art that's made with such purpose and skill made me feel really human. 20,000 year old pots just boggle my mind. I have made up my mind to visit as many "tourist" attractions we've got in our wonderful city winter break.
November 4, 2002
blah... 2nd round of midterms this week... wut the hell is wrong w/our profs anyways, giving tests the same day... it really bites when u have to commute >_< and dammit, how come i'm not losing anymore weight?!? it better b these marshmallowing muscles.....
October 30, 2002
ok... the spaghetti tonite... wasn't too great. I think i kinda overdid it by using too many ingredients. The bruschetta and mushrooms were a lil too much. Not to mention i did not notice that the mushrooms were marinated in balsamic vinegar. Strong and sharp... didn't blend well w/the rest of the sauce.
Ummm... been reading ppl's xanga and post pages... and i'm concerned about the negativity. I read a really long time ago off my friend's post, about how he felt saddened by his friends' troubles and negative views. I just read right over those profound thoughts back then... i didn't think much of it. Now, i feel exactly like he does... not only that, but i also feel guilty and saddened by the fact that i can't b around some of u guys when u encounter difficulties. (Please don't treat my last sentence as the cause of any additional burdens.) *sigh* I'm gonna try to talk now... gonna try to lighten every1 and myself up..... because everyone has ups and downs. It's complicated a lot of times... even when the problems are simple. I sound oversimplified, but we'll get by... and... I hope i've said something to help u guys. I'll be right here when u need me.
October 29, 2002
The new cooking craze i have is spaghetti... so i made some tonite with the angel hair pasta i always use... the sauce was 'ragu chunky garden style', which has tomatoes, onion and garlic. Mixed it with some 'prego -fresh mushroom'. Took some oregano from the backyard and cooked turkey meatballs and threw it in w/the sauce over stovetop. Added a lil bit of chopped sweet onions and freshly ground pepper, and poured everything over the pasta. It was really yummy ^_^
Tomorrow i'm gonna try to put in 'bruschetta dipping sauce' (tho it's really for bread toppings) into the mix and add some of that balsalmic vinegar marinated portabella mushrooms i saw in BJs the other day. Though, I think i'm going to skip on the parm... Yes, and i'll need to remember to add olive oil in and toss after i strain the pasta =)
October 27, 2002
Daylight savings... will bite me back later ^.^ Emmm, eating less these days and exercising is really helping. Been losing almost a pound a week since schl started. Going to trim 17 pounds, down to 165... that should put me in the FDA grouping of "healthy" if i'm "moderately muscular". I'm very nostalgic of my fitness in HS, esp. sophomore year... i figure i ate well at that time, played handball during lunch and fenced everyday after schl, soooo wut's to stop me from being like that now? Am i really that busy? I don't even have SATs to worry about anymore =)
No snacks, 2-3 light meals a day, no junk food, read all nutrition facts before consumption, only fruits and water outside meals, avoid fast food, and 4 days of weights and 3 days of handball a week... comon guys, suffer w/me =P
October 26, 2002
Grrr... yesterday i was sitting in business law waiting for our professor to show (since he's ALWAYS late), listening to my music... when this girl's bitching breaks through between songs. I didn't give at first, but then i was forced to turn down my volume and then finally argue with her when she started saying how the draft is wrong and how the gov't forces us to do stuff. She claimed that it's wrong for guys to have to register for selective service. When another guy said it's to protect our freedom, she replied, "freedom from what?" I couldn't stand anymore of her nonsense so i popped the question, "Why the hell are u taking business law?" She just couldn't grasp the fact that without these devices, our society would be chaotic or simply not be around. She claimed how it's a free country and ppl didn't have to be forced to do anything. She also said something like, "You're just saying that, when there's a war like in Iraq, you're gonna have to go." I almost laughed... cuz the last time we enacted the draft was Vietnam, where 50,000 Americans died. It'd hafta be a pretty big multi-year war, killing off most the active troops, and threatening reserves for them to take untrained college kids like me in.
Laws and gov't is around to help us continue to live in a society where its members are not perfect... it pissed me off so much, when i realized she didn't even have the appreciation for the sacrifices others had made in her benefit. GRRR, ppl these days...
October 23, 2002
Blah..... enough of nat'l and int'l probs... these days, it's really the stuff going on around me that suck >_< Stupid hw, mad midterms, missing my gz, waking up early... GRRR.....
*sigh*... on the other hand, it's almost November... in less than 2 months, i'll b leaving KCC and going back to Stony. The road back has been a humbling experience... trying to put everything to good use. Gonna continue to work hard and follow the classical Greek ideal; train the body and mind. (ain't art history great?) I'm well on my way to getting straight A's this semester. Haha, it'd b awesome if the grades would xfer over too along with the credits =)
October 10, 2002
Man, it's getting cold now... making me feel kinda lonely =T Grrr... so much crap to do... i'm like, taking breaks while i shower or eat... I read while i dump now... i mean, i already do that, but now it's actual schlwork! >.<
*sigh* at least business law is shaping up to b a great class... Right now we're studying contracts, which will take up the rest of the semester. (!) Today i learned the 'implied in fact contract', which basically means a contract where one indicated their agreement by way of their conduct, surrounding circumstances, and the common sense interpretation. So if u walk into a barber shop and sit down just to read a newspaper, and the barber starts cutting your hair... he can charge u for it. On the other hand, if you're sitting in a park, and a barber shows up and starts cutting your hair; sue his ass! hahaha =)
I used to think about why legal documents were so long and confusing. Why they're written in such awkward prose. Now i kno that we must. Especially seeing how English is a low-context language (meaning there's not a lot of meaning in a word out of context, or multiple meanings per word). Thus, English law documents tend to be lengthy... I'm appreciating the system of gov't we have in the United Stated more and more everyday, seeing how our system relatively successfully implements common sense and justice. Of course, if there's more than one person involved, there can never be justice... but our legal system tries its best. In 'economics of int'l trade' class, i can see all sorts of laws in action. The prof said that we have 5% of the world's pop., 70% of all court cases, and 90% of all attorneys. I bought this stat up to my business law prof, and he said that's definately true. And while the US spends a disproportionate amt. of time in litigation, we also have the highest compliance w/the law. And it makes sense... one of the things i see to be an obstable in my future is the compliance w/the law. Most likely i will participate in business in China in the future... and from the accounts i see, compliance and corruption will make work rather difficult. =T (which reminds me, today is Taiwan's bday...)
October 5, 2002
The news sure is disturbing these days... this 64 year old woman was awarded US$28 billion by an LA jury against Philip Morris. Yes, 28 bil. In the unlikely event she collects (most people analysts agree on this), she would become the 3rd richest American, behind Gates and Buffet. What the hell is up with those Californians these days?? 28 billion is just simply outrageous and against the norms of society.
This Dubya character "running" our country ain't too straight either. Bush seems to be putting the United States economy on the back burner... trying to distract everyone with this "let's fire first" attempt on Iraq. Scanning back to my magazines from the election year 2000, I was unpleasantly suprised at what many columnists expressed as, "will this Bush push us into a recession too?" Bush and his actually experienced team is just not suitable to handle domestic issues. Cheney, Powell, Rumsfeld, and Rice make this suck like 1991.
October 4, 2002
What is it with girls in KCC and sandals? I think about 20% of the girls there wear sandals. It's like, everywhere you go... *flip flop flip flop* Up the stairs, down the stairs... *clonk clonk clonk*
Ahhh yes, we got the car "fixed". Replaced the fuel filter, airflow sensor, and engine mounts. Though there's still some jerky motions when you drive. I think they just upped the idle engine rpm so it'd keep running at stoplights. Or at least that's what i think they did cuz after the tuneup, the car is noisier. Blah, and we're out 480 buks >.<
September 30th, 2002
What a crappy day. We had car trouble to and from B'klyn today... so bad we had to drop by our mechanic. So I'll be taking mass transit the whole way tomorrow. Man, we really need a new car. Our '88 Cutlass Ciera has almost 188,000 miles on it. (that's around the globe 7.5 times or one light-second) Original engine and transmission too.
So i get to schl... and my prof gives the the test today instead of tomorrow. Even when half the class says it's tomorrow. Apparently only the honors section, the ones now even taking it, knew it was tomorrow >.< Grrr...
September 29th, 2002
Hmmm, it appears i'm now chaotic rather than neutral. I'm also now a half-elf instead of elf. Seems like i'm getting more human or something...
I Am A: Chaotic Good Half-Elf Ranger Paladin
Alignment:
Chaotic Good characters are independent types with a strong belief in the value of goodness. They have little use for governments and other forces of order, and will generally do their own things, without heed to such groups.
Race:
Half-Elves are a cross between a human and an elf. They are smaller, like their elven ancestors, but have a much shorter lifespan. They are sometimes looked down upon as half-breeds, but this is rare. They have both the curious drive of humans and the patience of elves.
Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.
Secondary Class:
Paladins are the Holy Warriors. They have been chosen by a God/dess to be their representative on Earth, and must follow the code of that deity, or risk severe penalties. They tend towards being righteous, but not generally to excess.
Deity:
Solonor Thelandria
Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of
NeppyMan (e-mail)
September 28th, 2002
Okies... so this is the new look/URL... "oooohhhhh ahhhhhh". Yea, nothing much... CHK suggested i could see if Geocities supports scripts, which would allow me to create my own reader feedback thingy. Hmmm, good point =)
Bleh, it's raining again... watch the car short circuit again. Last Friday, constant rain overnight drained the car battery. Our trusty portable jump start kit didn't work. We had to hook the car to a charger powered by the house's AC. Good thing we had three 50' extension cables; running from the living room, out the door, across the lawn, and across the street! It's amazing the charger still works, since we bought it from Sears in 1988 =P
BTW, my room flooded... the washing machine missed the sink =T So i had to clean everything up, and air out some things. Big pain in the butt. It was a lot better than the time when the water boiler broke. That time was half an inch everywhere... this time was ony half an inch mainly in the staircase area and back room. Man, too many probs these days. If i were to design a house, i think i'd make most of the interior stainless steel. That way, when i have to clean the rooms, i'll jus hose the place down w/bleach solution and let the drain i built into the floor at the middle of each room handle the rest =P Hmmm, it'd hafta be AC'd and heated seasonally of course... don't wanna freeze or die of heat.
The events around us and around the world have bothered me for quite some time... our President is advocating a dramatic shift in nat'l security policy to accomadate pre-emptive military actions on states w/WMD... the stock market, specifically the DJIA, is at the level it was when we were all freshmen at BxSci... big business is suffering waves of setbacks in profits and ethics... These things aren't going to be going away any time soon. I can understand the reasoning behind Bush's moves, tho i don't agree that it's the right thing to do. We can't just say that because we have big guns, we want to make sure (w/the ultimate threat of force) that anyone else shouldn't have any. Of course, sometimes doing the right thing means taking dangerous risks. (Can we really risk Iraq controlling nuclear weapons? Once Iraq gets nukes, it is highly likely terrorists will also.) In any event, history is littered w/civilizations attacking one another to strengthen themselves. My worst fear is terrorists w/nukes... because bluntly put, even a teeny weeny nuke will make the WTC look like dead bugs on a windshield. Another thing i'm concerned about is the state of the American economy... all i can say is, it's a warzone out there... and it damn well better shape up when i graduate =)
September 27th, 2002
GRRR! Geocities lost my post when i JUST clicked save. Damn 404! ARG! must remember to copy posts! Geocities has royally screwed me over this time >.< I think they have a limit on how big a page can be. I realize that my NewUD page has an insane amount of HTML... so i'm gonna have to divide things up and post only the current year, archiving the rest. Arg! it's so annoying... i may switch to Xanga. Tho i don't want to give up complete control of my posting. It's easier to save all my pages in whole on Geocities also. But then, Xanga has that reader response feature, which i really like..... aiya le!! >.<
September 26th, 2002
Hmmm, still raining... tomorrow's Friday... I miss my gz... she works so hard these days >.< *sigh* I finally got my MD remote, which i'm very satisfied with... and err, another stupid software purchase... Starcraft. OMG SC?! Yes, since it was the 2002 version (includes latest patch and finally compatible with Win2K) and only 10 buks; i got it. I figure i'd be able to sell the CD key for more >=) haha jp. Geez, wut the hell am i doing buying software?! Ack! O wells, another cd key to my "colleetion" =)
Blah, tomorrow i hafta drag my butt to KCC for one class... y can't she cancel too? This bites... on the other hand, i'm really enjoying business law. I know business law sounds boring as hell... but simply put, the philisophical reasons behind law fascinate me. Today, i was actually excited to discover the differences between civil (or tort) law, and criminal law! Civil law is when an individual/person is the victim. The victim is then compensated by the wrongdoer. Criminal law applies when the villian is/could harm society. The solution in this case is removal from society. It's really quite interesting... our professor talk kinda loud for a class of 30, but at least he's funny and keeps us awake =) Anyways, back to work.....
September 17th, 2002
*muah muah muah* Visited gz and friends at Stony yesterday. While i couldn't stay terribly long, it was really satisfying for every1 =) I miss u guys so much... *sigh*
Alrite!~ i'm subbing in for my modern American history teacher tomorrow. Gonna b covering some stuff on the Great Depression and answering any questions about all the material up to now. Wow... i must say i'm really excited =) I'm getting to do wut i wanna do sometime in my life... teach history. I actually got on good terms w/my professor cuz i was able to name 3 outta 4 Supreme Court Justices who were not white males... anyways, i figure this would help me in the number one American phobia as well; public speaking =P Heh, I should ask gz for some tips on teaching =)
Aiya le..... my MD remote's been sitting in NJ for the past 5 days... geez, "free shipping means slooooooow shipping" =T I'm looking forward to using the remote cuz i like to put my MD inside my jacket. And on this jacket, the inside pocket is fairly "down there" *ahem*... it jus doesn't look right groping for them buttons.
September 14th, 2002
This page takes too long to load >.<
September 11th, 2002
It's been a year. What have we accomplished? Is it back to normal? Some, and no. We've succeeded in setting up a gov't in Afghanistan... how long, stable, and prosperous it will be has yet to be seen. The WTC tract of land is now a big hole in the ground. The rubble is gone, but recontruction will take years. Al Qaeda is hindered, but still viable. Bin Laden's still running. We'll never be back to 'normal'. Though, we've moved on, and done a superb job at that. Americans have an amazing amount of hardiness and yearning for happiness. We will remember September 11th, 2001... as a day we survived and dealt w/life, even when many had to give up their lives to do it.
Schl's progressing along well. I can tell art history and business law are gonna be a pain in the ass. A lot of paper. Handout after handout. Geez. Economics of int'l trade looks like it's gonna be a brainy class, our teacher used to work for a major US corporation (he won't tell us wut company, tho he tells us he's been married 5 times) and the gov't of Israel and the US. This guy demands answers! My only gripe of KCC is getting up at 5:47am and getting home 12 hours later every day. I suppose i'll get used to it, just like BxSci. My teachers r all Jewish, which is typical of the neighborhood. (Lotsa older Russian Jews at Brighton Beach.) How is the campus you might wonder? Cozy, pleasant and very windy. The place certainly does look better than Stony. (obviously there are no brigdes to nowhere, two big buidlings connected by a tunnel, lopsided floors, etc...) The campus is much smaller, and features a complex of interconnected academic buildings. The wind and smell of the sea is constant. Especially today; 50mph winds... the campus is a peninsula on another peninsula, rigidly jutting out into the ocean. Today it was so windy, sand was getting blown around and so every1 got sandblasted walking near the beach =) lil bastard sand grains... On the other hand, i hate to say; i miss Stony's variety of food. KCC food is horrible, very lil good food. Everyday i only eat like a bagel and a Snapple >.<
Ahhh yes... and Pete Sampras won =)
September 7th, 2002
OMG, it's been chive buffet here. We grow mad stuff in the backyard, and chives is one of them. There's around 24 sq. ft. of chives... that's enough for like 5 families. The thing grows as fast as grass... we've been eating them like crazy. Cucumbers... geez, we must've eaten at least 90 cucumbers this summer... it's great our veggies r growing... i jus wished we could sell them instead =P haha, I need to raise a bit of money for my MD remote...
In stupider news... those lil junior high punks piss me off. Is this America's future? Loud mouthed, rude, obnoxious sore losers? These kids must not get much attention... i was playing handball w/them and it seems that they need to cheat to play. I don't get how you could insist a serve was out when it's a foot good. Sports really do display a person's true character...
Speaking of sports... Agassi v Sampras; US Open finals!!! I haven't seen these guys duke it out in a long time. It's already amazing they blew past their decade younger opponents and guaranteed an American sweep in the US Open. Sampras leads 19-14 in previous games... so it's still pretty close. I hope Sampras wins... the way he's been playing recently... and his goal for a record 14th Grand Slam win is very powerful. This is gonna b a classic game, cuz it'll pit Agassi's baseline prowess against Sampras' aggressive serve-and-volley style. I love watching these two cuz i get so inspired and by their talent, it really helps in my handball and racquetball. I remember the last time Agassi won, in the Austrailian and French Opens, i was watching whole games halfway out my door in anticipation of emulating them at the handball courts =)
September 3rd, 2002
Yes, fall semester's rolling around. I'm gonna have to work extra hard at KCC, not only because i need to get back to Stony, but the business dept. at Baruch said the classes i'm taking at KCC aren't going to be easy. I'm taking 'business law', 'economics of int'l trade', and 'money and banking'. Then there's an art class and and something else for my damn DECs. I may xfer to Baruch instead of going back to Stony. Though it's not likely since i'd be behind for my year and major they say. Plus, i'd hate to ditch my awesome friends in Stony =)
I was reading Jason's Xanga site and saw he was interested in the new Creative Nomad MuVo. It's an MP3 player that's the size of a lighter. (very nice!) It doesn't require software to xfer songs/files too... the computer detects it as removable storage. I started scouting vendors, but found the $180 price tag larger than my wallet. (The 64MB version is $130... but a dozen songs aren't gonna satisfy me when i commute.) I looked around some more and came across a Sony NetMD Recorder; MZ-N505. It's priced at $150, and can store 5 hours of music on a single 80min MD. I figure MDs only cost a few bucks, so it'd be ok to buy more storage media. That proved unnecessary, since now my MD holds 76 songs, 1/5 of all the MP3s on my computer. You just use this weird Sony software and xfer via USB. The battery life is amazing too, 50+ hours w/a single AA. This new ATRAC3 compression codec Sony has is a real winner. So now i'm a dedicated MD fan. No more thinking about MP3 players! The only thing i need right now is a remote... apparently, only the European version comes with one. Though it looks like a nice remote's gonna cost me up to $60 =T
August 19th, 2002
OK, these sneakers were NOT designed w/handball in mind... the hard flat sole really hinders any movement. Perhaps i haven't really broken them in... but they're not that great to begin with. Dammit, and i thought Riddell made football helmets. I suppose i should wear my new Nikes or at least my old sneaks.
Yea, i think it's time to start planning our next BBQ. Mayby we should try an all seafood deal. Salmon and shrimp would be cool. Hmmmm, I suppose we could try something stupid like squid...
Interesting... a pellet of rice is stuck on my shirt... emmm, i'm getting sloppy =)
August 13th, 2002
Yes! tonite's BBQ was awesome! Ribs, shishkabobs, salad, and salmon. The grilled salmon was the best... CHK's idea to baste in honey/vinegar/brown sugar was really good. Next time all we hafta remember is to cut the salmon slab into smaller chunks; damn pcs. falling thru the grill. The ribs were kinda fatty, but they were good. I marinated the shishkabobs in teriyaki w/some steak seasoning, and diced in one red pepper. We never got around to eating the corn and pie tho... jus too much meat. I think JNG got skinnier too... he ate 1 shishkabob and some salmon (ok, and a 7UP and Nestea)... eat some more dammit =) Hahaha wow, we finally had our BBQ =P
August 8th, 2002
Nothing much happening these days... or rather, too much of the same. My parents are starting to really piss me off now. They are really turning up the nagging. Sounds bad... it is. Far from being a disobedient son, i've been a tolerant one. I jus can't take constant bitching every single day. Every single day. EVERY SINGLE DAY. Did that annoy you? Reading: "Every single day" four times already? Well, that's only four times..... My dad is constantly on my case... i probably deserve it for doing so poorly the past year. But the guy does not know how to do anything else. Our parents are typically very Asian. So Asian, they don't see how studying and being indoors all the time dampens the spirit. Sometimes, studying and working is all they know to do. Their views of American society we live in is skewed and limited. I think it stems from not wanting to get assimilated, trying to keep to their roots. I don't think that's bad... but it's not supposed to be all u can see.
Sometimes i think intensely about why we're here the way we are... i know my parents aren't slackers. They've worked very hard to get to where they are now... but i feel that this is less than they've deserved. There are many factors affecting a person's "peak" in life. I understand that there can be things such as discrimination undermining my parents' efforts. But perhaps the most crucial limiting factor my parents have is not trying something new. Well of course we try a new brand of baked beans or another type of detergent... but it's not like that. A recent example would be phone cards. People have been using them for years, as they present better value than the long-distance plans your phone company offers. My parents however, just used them recently... and have been touting all day long about how good it is. Yes yes, it's really old news. Phone cards are one thing... there's an even better system called OneSuite. (chk out their website at OneSuite.com) OneSuite is like a phone card, but u don't need the card. You sign up and dial their 800 number w/your PIN and it gets charged automatically on your credit card acct. It's very cheap too, comparing favorably to phone cards. While i may b younger, this is a poor excuse for my parents not knowing about phone cards, and less so, OneSuite. I think my parents are in a cocoon, their standard channels of communication the TV and newspapers. Typically, our channels should also include friends, the Internet, and your own personal quests. In these areas, my parents are sorely lacking. It's not that they don't have friends, they do, a good number of really good ones. It's just that they rarely communicate, especially for social occasions. I make/get calls for things like handball and such very often. We don't just play hball, we also talk about other things. Things that would be mutually beneficial, like which company is seeking interns, or classes we're taking. If there were 100 phone calls to my house, 25 would be for me, 25 for my sis, 47 telemarketers, and lastly 3 for my parents... all subjects included. It sounds bad, but I think you just can't get anywhere w/o connections and communicating.
Now, i may be venting here... Having been just bitched to recently does affect your judgements. I see there are also many things I need to improve. I think i need to learn to ask for help. Too often does my pride get in the way. Also, with all the lecturing my parents have doled out over the past decade or two, i've been reluctant to ask for help. It's like, i jus got a 2 hour lecture; lecture me some more =) *sigh* I can tell these are gonna be long days... I'm positive i'll miss my family when it's too late and i'm all grown up and moved out... but for now, please leave me the fuck alone.
August 2nd, 2002
Downpours today. A huge branch on the tree in front of my house cracked off and crashed onto the wide double-yellow street, blocking 70% of it. Luckily, my dad didn't park his car there when he got home... good fortune graced us again when Chuing had his car under the tree jus an hour before... but our stomachs summoned up an urge for Wendy's =) We called the police who called the FD and they arrived promptly to clean up the mess within 5 minutes. It was a really fast and smooth operation... so now it's jus sanitation or the parks dept. to throw out the remains.
So, that was a bit of excitement today. *sigh* We haven't had a BBQ in a long while now. I see so many ppl having BBQs left and right... while our group is scattered and well, not BBQing. Dammit, i went BBQ shopping w/Gongzhu and her friend Weiling the other day and i jus felt so nostalgic and sad over how we haven't had a group gathering of the Four Angels in years. It's always 2 or the most 3 of us. I want a BBQ within the next 2 weeks and this time, we're doing it right. The works =) And no more wasting meat throwing it at the cats! They've been spoiled enough by our gourmet burnt meat.
Geez!, it's time for another usual Friends-Everybody Loves Raymond-Frasier run again... which reminds me... i'm considering making a Movies Review Section. I jus love watching movies and talking about them.
July 29th, 2002
Is this a blog page? Who started calling postings "Blogs"? Was it Blogger.com? I have no idea... but lately, in the past 6 months, i've seen blogs addressed in many mainstream news magazines. (Newsweek, PC Mag, Business 2.0, etc...) Tho these appear to ignore the type of things i'm doing now and concentrate on blogs w/more "important" concerns. (Political decision discussions, as opposed to my rants about not enough bike trails in NYC.) I think it's interesting that the older literary public has noticed blogs. The concept has certianly been around long enough, since the advent of the first few personal webpages i suppose. The attention is really centered around the "big blogs" on the net like andrewsullivan.com. They post about news, politics, religion and sexuality there. If any1's serious about getting their opinions and views out, these are the venues you should seek.
Which reminds me... "Rich Dad Poor Dad" is actually a really refreshing book. I don't agree w/everything it explains, but i can see the logic behind all of its reasons. My dad told me about it after he saw it in the World Journal some time ago... but who really takes their parents seriously? =) Then i was reading Jason's Xanga about it, and decided to get the book. RDPD challenges a lot of the things we're brought up to believe, but it's ultimate goal is to educate ppl on financial intelligence. How money works, and how u should not b a slave working for it. One of the points it makes is how your house would b considered a liability, rather than an asset. I found this confusing, since my dad was always happy about how our house was appreciating so well. Though i thought that no matter how much our house was appreciating, it wasn't much use if we didn't sell it... in RDPD, the author further states how a house was detrimental. Defining an asset as something that returns profit w/o u having to work at it much (which counts out normal jobs like a doctor being an asset) and a liability as everything else: a house is a liability because it normally requires a mortage. (if u bought it all upfront, u rn't having much financial troubles) Wealthy ppl focus on acquiring assets, and minimizing liabilities... this was one of the main arguments in the book. "Rich Dad Poor Dad" isn't about how to get rich quick, but to show u how u shouldn't let money pressures push u around in life. I highly recommend this book, even if u don't agree w/it, it should get some juices flowing =)
Ok, anyways... back to surfing for Jewel lyrics.
July 19th, 2002
I'm home now... Many thanks to Chuing for the lift =) Today was a really shitty hot day too... fuggin Stony so inflexible, not letting me chk out when the RHD has office hours. Is it really so hard for the person who supervises all the damn RAs check my room and hand in my keys?! CHK says in CMU, they have online chk out!
July 17th, 2002
Whew... Microsoft is slated to release Service Pack 3 for Windows 2000. That's great news... since MSFT wanted to stop support for Win2K in early 2004. It appears they'll have to extend that date now. Ugh, Windows XP sucks so much. I think if ppl were armed w/the facts, they would choose Win2K over XP in a heartbeat. Windows 2000 is the only thing in computers that hasn't fuggin pissed me off =)
July 16th, 2002
"It is only in the mysterious equations of love, that any logic or reasons can be found."
July 15th, 2002
I really need a new computer at home... it's a pathetic P200, 32MB RAM, 4GB HD, 2MB video card and 33.6 modem... u DON'T wanna right click by accident, or click a popup... it takes almost a full MINUTE to open AOL. >=T
July 14th, 2002
Well, since i'll b home for the next few months til Christmas, i'll b trying to work out more. Yes, i think it's time to really invest in a nice biking helmet. Especially seeing how dumbass Bloomberg made it illegal to ride bikes on sidewalks... wut the hell is the point of biking now?! I wanna see Bloomberg on a bike in the street... i hate it when politicians listen the the saftey ppl bitching about bikers on sidewalks. Obviously walkers come first... but it's not exactly safe for bikers to share roads w/multi-ton vehicles. I'm expecting NYC's rating on the list of 'cities most unfriendly to bicyclists' to worsen =T Boston and Seattle rank really well as bike friendly cities... they have mad bike only lanes and stuff =)
July 13th, 2002
I've been getting a few responses about yesterday's post. Most seem to ask y i'm saying sorry. This seems rather confusing to me, since i don't know wut else would work. Basically, all that effort invested in me was pretty much wasted. It'll b back, but i'm regretting that i won't b around to show it for a lil while. That's really wut i'm saying it for. Hmmm, that's about it... i'm getting lotsa encouragement, which is really good... thanks u guys =)
As you've probably noticed, this page is taking longer and longer to load. It's taking like 15 seconds on a 56K modem. This page has exceeded 100Kb of text and code. Chuck in the background image and sound and it takes quite a bit of time to load on my 33.6 modem. I'm considering archiving posts by year... or perhaps only showing the current year (having an archive consist of everything before). Well, i'll work on that laters...
July 12th, 2002
My friends... if I can even deserve to call you that..... I have reached a low point in my life, the lowest I have ever been. These past few semesters at Stony Brook have all been a great big lie. It appears that I’m doing ok; going to classes and my everyday routines. This however, is not the case. In reality, I have been neglecting my studies... doing only the bare minimum of work. As we all know, doing the bare minimum doesn't get you anywhere.
Well, being so indolent has cost me dearly. This summer, the Office of the Dean informed me that I’m under academic suspension. They state that I need to resolve any issues that are giving me such poor performances and then hopefully, come back to Stony by academic reinstatement. The soonest I can get back to Stony is Spring 2003. (They want 1 semester of off time) I have tried very hard to convince the faculty panel otherwise, but they stand by their decision. My classes are being cancelled and dorm appointments soon expired.
I'm sure this revelation comes as a shock to you. For that, I am truly very sorry. It is my fault. I know that sorry doesn't cut it most the time, that if one were truly sorry in the first place, things wouldn't happen. I'm telling you right now that if you're thinking this; you're both right and wrong. I AM sorry, and while I know I wasn't sorry enough to prevent this in the first place... I can promise you that I will try to the best of my abilities to never let this sort of thing happen again. I don't know how much you guys can really trust me now... individually, I will leave that to how you know me, and our relationships. But rest assured, there will be no evading responsibilities. I have made serious mistakes, and resolve to never commit them again.
Though I say I am sorry, there are still things on my mind that warrant mention. These are things that show how I now understand my dire situation. My first concerns are with my family. I know this is hitting them hard. Very hard. Their guidance over the duration of my life have not been in vain. The sweat, blood, and tears they have poured into me so that I could succeed are still all within me. I am not a different person, but one who has erred most stupidly. My friends, especially my best friends Chuing and Winson... you guys have always been there for me. We grew up together, learned, and had fun together. My Gongzhu Anne, this has to be the biggest disappointment we have faced. You have been at my side for everything and remain a terrific friend. All my friends have been awesome individuals... I’m very picky in befriending you guys, and I hope you guys know that. I will never forget the support and friendships my family and friends have given to me throughout my life. They will remain with me even if I am reincarnated several times over. That, is the level of my appreciation and your influence.
I wish I could alleviate the pain, anger, worry, and disappointment I am undoubtedly causing everyone. I know I cannot. The only thing that possibly can, are results. Whatever faith you have in me, I don't blame you for disposing of. I can only beg for your forgiveness and for you not to give up on me. From this point on, I can obviously not afford to go about as I have for so long. There can be no excess of entertainment I pursue, but instead, plenty of refocusing and studying towards my goals. I have already failed my family and friends, and most importantly, let myself down.
My options right now consist of attending several other colleges in the region. Kingsborough Community College, Nassau CC, Suffolk CC, SUNY Farmingdale, St. John's University, Long Island U., Adelphi U., York College, and Queenborough CC are some of my choices. I will be living at home during the time I am in one of these schools. I'm still in the process of researching the details, but I’m leaning towards York and Kingsborough. They both have good programs for people in my situation and host decent business and accounting programs. I will need to take a full semester (Fall 2002) at one of these institutions and prove my case to reenter Stony Brook. I have been informed that if I do well, I will stand an excellent chance of being reinstated, and that most of the courses I will take in other schools will have their credit and grades transferred over to Stony towards my graduation. In addition, I have talked to the Campus Residences Director regarding my intention to reserve a spot in Dewey College so my roomie obligations will eventually still work out.
The consequences of these events and actions, I am aware of. My ambitions in life have often been vacillating and not concrete. After being interested and invested in computers for so long, I have switched majors to business management. I aim to minor in history and/or political science. I am also considering a track in international business somewhere. All of this however, is still not going to bode well for my future; as when I am seeking employment. Socially, I will see how much everyone already cares about me. I wish to thank my family in advance. They cannot be thanked ever enough. My friends, thank you... I’d probably be gun running right now if it weren't for our positive companionships. Anne, I don't know how you put up with me, thank you. Everyone, thank you. The good parts in me of the person I am, I owe all to you guys... the bad part of me in the person I am is purely of my own.
Throughout the time I spent composing this text, my view of the computer screen was constantly blurred by the tears in my eyes. I thought of all the times when I was the recipient of everyone’s help. How I failed to realize the importance of my actions. How many countless chances I was given to correct myself. The fun times I had with everyone. The moments when I thought about my future on this planet. All of these thoughts seem pretty distant right now. In time, I will recover. I will continue and realize my education and career aspirations. I will rebuild the trust that has been shattered. I will redeem myself in the eyes of my family, friends, and myself. I will proceed to accomplish this immediately and as quickly as possible. If you have any thoughts or questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. This will be a really rough period in my life, and regretfully, yours too, because of me. I'm sorry.
- David Chang 7-12-2002
July 11th, 2002
Well, Business Ethics was really interesting... we have somewut of a strict teacher... but it was alrite. I really doubt i'll b late or not ready when he calls on me. We were discussing racial and gender discrimination in the work place... which reminds me, i already have a short presentation due Monday. Tho Stony doesn't offer a Speech Class, i figure this class, among others, could work to alleviate that shortcoming. It's amazing how unethical some companies are... for example; Philip Morris (which controls 80% of the cigarette market in the Czech Rep.) actually had Authur D. Little Int'l (a well respected accting firm) commission a report to the Czech gov't how the state would save money from the premature death of smokers. Geez, i couldn't believe the lengths to which a company would go to safeguard profits. (In this case, the Czech gov't was debating whether to raise tobacco taxes.)
It appears my normal day is gonna consist of sleep (sleeping at ~3am waking up around 11am), reading up on my classes, racquetball, eat(breakfast/lunch/dinner), shower, some rest, class (6-930pm), RSP (on Friday/Sat/Sun), chat w/Gongzhu on phone, and finally sleep again. It's actually not too bad... obviously, the one meal a day thing isn't too healthy. But it's still survivable.
Hmmm, our schl jus got new racquets. Wilson Strike/Mach3s... decent racquets. I think they're around 12-15 bucks more expensive than the 20 buk Rippers they had before. Anyways, i used one and man my wrist started hurting. I noticed it was distinctly heavier than mine, but i guess that's where my thinking stopped, cuz i started using it like it was my Ti-175. All those snaps took a toll on my wrist... i now appreciate how light and manueverable my racquet is. I couldn't believe how much my play was limited by a heavy racquet... the new Wilsons the schl got must b like 220 grams each. (in constrast, my Head is 175grams) Not to mention i can't play as well w/an evenly balanced racquet anymore. I'm used to the the slinging effect of head-heavy ones already. Hmmm, i guess another thing w/Wilson racquets is that the handles r usually pretty big. I think this is hugely detrimental (unless u got big hands or prefer big grips). It seems like Wilson is borrowing too much from their tennis division, and almost applying tennis tech in a hand-me-down fashion to racquetball. O wells, smaller grips (i use a "SuperSmall" 3 5/8) yields better grip, more power and control, and better manueverability.
I know, i'm obsessed =)
July 10th, 2002
Grrr, classes later today... living at Irving B106 these days... it's alrite, but it's 1st floor again. (I like second) Wow, i really bought the bare minimum stuff this time. Books, computer and clothes only. O yea, i jus saw the stupidest thing walking to 7-11 yesterday... it was raining and the sprinklers were all on in back of the sports complex. I think it's like that time when it was 90º and ppl were complaining about the heat being on... except the fuggin schl sets it for the whole season and "u can't change it".
July 5th, 2002
Today was such a nice day. 80s and a breeze... basically jus stayed home and played handball. Gongzhu came over and that jus made the day even better =) We ate some pizza and ice cream, and watched Ranma and Slam Dunk. It felt like schl again... unfortunately, i have summer schl soon on the 9th... i figure in 6 weeks i'll all b over... i can't until fall and winter comes. U jus can't cuddle in the summer. (Unless you're in a hotel w/maximum AC, huddling under the covers)
I saw A Beautiful Mind today. At first i thought i'd jus watch the first few minutes... since i jus put it on my computer off my CDs. I do that a lot, burn something and then dig it up months later to watch. So anyways, i jus got immersed in the life of John Nash. I couldn't stop, and by the time i was listening to the ending credits theme, i had lil tears welled up in my eyes. I find stories like these really moving. In general, i guess i'm a sucker for plots w/one person taking on a huge task/organization/gov't and succeeding. A Beautiful Mind, such a human movie =)
July 3rd, 2002
Grrr... this weather sucks! It was 95 yesterday and today it's gonna b 100. These are the times when i hate NYC. I'd so much rather b in say Canada. At least i'm ok in my basement, i feel sorry for all those ppl living in attics and dingy apartments. Actually, i think NYC is special in that way. We have such a range of temperatures and weather. We're as cold as 10 below zero sometimes and as high as 100º. We get snow, acid rain, muggy afternoons, everything... i guess it really wrecks havok on our man-made structures.
Though, it's interesting, since all the most important cities in the world have diverse ranges of weather and experience snow. London, NYC, DC, Tokyo, Beijing, Moscow, Berlin... it's no accident these cities are all located north. Supposedly, as published in Scientific American, northern cities enjoyed a crucial advantage in the ancient times. The fact that northern cities had really cold winters; limited the extent diseases and such would have on the rapid decimation of population. (EX: no mosquitos in NYC in the winter, but in Central America, malaria is a year long threat...) This resulted in more stable societies for northern population centers, allowing for steadier advancement. Southern civilizations also tended to b much more agricultural. This encouraged a bit of "complacency" since it was basically growing season all the time. So perhaps our southern civilization's happily growing their crops in December... meanwhile, their northern counterparts are huddled indoors. Obviously they wouldn't b growing anything in the snow... so jus wut do they do indoors? Well, they're probably feeding off their food reserves and thinking up stuff... stuff like i dunno..... weapons. Wut for? Cuz they're eyeing their food-rich neighbors to the south =)
June 30th, 2002
Ack! Out of Stock! Normally i wouldn't b so alarmed, but they've been out of stock 2/3 times i checked. Grrr... i don't wanna buy from Sports Authority, cuz they retail at 80, not including tax. That's 10 buks more than RacquetballCatalog.com. And since i'm buying 2 of these, it comes out to 20 buks difference. Not to mention i need new gloves, (there's a hole forming already), eye protection (did i mention i'm getting new contacts for racquetball? my fencing ones are shriveled pieces of plastic now) Grrr... tho i need my paychecks to come in for me to feel at ease buying all this stuff.
Still waiting for 2 checks. RSP, and the petition job i had for 3 days trying to collect signatures for Jimmy Meng. (AD.22 candidate) I still can't believe the poor organization of that place. Geez, they called me a few days ago for my SS#... isn't it written on the same page as my phone number? They're taxing us 25% too! The bastards. It boils down to the sad fact that we've been toiling around in the heat of Flushing at 7.50/hr. That's pathetic. It's my own fault for not realizing the possibility that they would tax us 25% since i doubt any of us can claim any exemptions. *sigh* I asked around and it appears that i can request tax refunds later as long as my parents report this income to the IRS. So these Jimmy bums better have the paperwork straight when i do this. At least it's alleviated thoughts that the Friends of Jimmy Org. are trying to gyp some ppl. I'd say we were screwed over from the start anyways...
Not much summer left for me... so many things to do. I'm still recovering from yesterday's marathon day of handball... my legs are so tired... i slept and napped 10 hours today... haven't done that since schl let out. It's so cool how a nap makes u feel better. Sleep really is bliss.
June 29th, 2002
I wonder how many of you have younger siblings. I was jus thinking today about the generation gap. How each generation can't really relate to another. We see lotsa "typical generations" all the time: your WW2 vet, the grew up in the 70s stockbroker, the homeless Vietnam vet, even us; so called generation X/Y/Z (i'm guessing Y), computers and the WTC... Each generation has their moments, and their own unique history. Of course our parents understand us... to an extent. I'm sure mine don't understand y i stay up so late so much. Or wut's so fun about video games. It jus isn't easily relatable if they didn't do it at our age.
Do you feel old at times? I sure do, seeing schls change principals and converting to oil heat... i feel as if elementary schl was ages ago. In fact, it's been less than 10 years. Not too long actually. Heh, i'm already out of touch w/the latest Power Rangers (they're coming out w/all sorts of weird versions of that stupid squad) to disses and slang terms in schl. As we grow up, we simply leave our young and adolescent environments. Most of us are in college, perhaps drive to work, pay taxes and take our friends out to eat? Since when did we NOT hang everyday after schl? Pretty unthinkable when we were kids huh? I guess we jus grew up... wut does this speak of our generation gaps? Especially when we have kids ourselves? Can we fairly blame our parents for not understanding us?
The line should b drawn at the point where ppl need to understand that they are not some1 else, and another person is not him/her. Hmmm, i think that means that when there is a generation gap, both parties at least need to kno they're different.
Anyways, my dad is really telling me to go to sleep at this point. It's 1:19AM anyways... June30. Cyas laters =)
June 28th, 2002
Wow, Minority Report was a really good movie. Haven't seen a good movie in a while... for those of you who haven't seen it, (i'm not gonna spoil it) MR's about a society that experiments w/cathching murderers before they can commit their acts. Sounds pretty similar to our current Presidential Administration's policies on detaining suspects. In any case, MR invokes lots of thought, almost as much thought as The Matrix. Watch it guys! =)
It's no suprise the acting in Minority Report was above average... starring Tom Cruise (finally in a movie i can appreciate since 1985) and directed by Steven Spielsberg (sp?). Jus the other day i was talking about the Eastern and Western approaches to "individual presentation" w/my parents. It's no secret Asians in general are crappy actors. In Asian countries, actors like to sing too, and vice versa... often to really disappointing results in one area. I'm not saying we don't have that here in the US; J. Lo for that matter, needs to stick to singing... or acting... geez i can't figure out which one she suck more in. I love Mariah Carey, but she shoulda stopped singing shortly after her Daydream album, and why o why did she decide to go into acting?
Which kinda leads up to my opinion that we don't have a great deal many great Asian actors because Asian society is so fundamentally different from American or European society. Focusing on education: American students are much more likely to b expressive and less shy. (that doesn't mean they're smart, or dumb either...) Asian students on the other hand, generally kno the material by heart, yet act like fresh recruits on the first day of boot camp when a tchr. asks if any1 knos the answer to so and so.....
The results of such attitudes and practices can b seen every time u tune in to Chinese television and some "really important figure" is making say- a nat'l speech. He'll have lil post cards or other written material in front of him as he/she addresses the audience, reading almost verbatim and relying way too much on the words he/she prepared. The American President (perhaps more hi-tech) uses a teleprompter, an electronic device that projects words onto a glass plane visible only to the President. This is essentially the same thing as having paper in front of u, but it doesn't appear that American presidents use it much at all. I agree it doesn't looks too great for an Asian high political official to be so concentrated on the prepared text.
Thankfully, i've actually been informed that some Asian schools are trying to reverse this trend of fear of public speaking. I guess fear of speaking in public ranks pretty high up in the global list of phobias anyways... in Taiwan, supposedly they're incorporating more oral presentations in classrooms. I wonder if those Taiwanese education representatives that visited BxSci a few years back were any influenced by Science. Maybe they were...
We're pretty lucky to be growing up and educated in the US. As shitty as our public schools are... we should b alrite. The conditions for other places is jus far worse. I know for a fact that the Flushing library, AC'd and all, is pretty big compared to the all but the National Library in Taiwan. Hmmm, does this mean we should study harder to take advantage of our environment? (see, that's y there's at least three Internet/LAN cafes within a 5 block radius of the library, to help us resist our urge to study) Alrite, i probably sound like one or more of your parents (heck i even look it w/my grandpa glasses), so i'm gonna stop here =)
June 25th, 2002
Happy Birthday to my Gongzhu. Sagwa de Gongzhu's 19 now =)
Took my sis to BxSci for the math placement exam this morning. Oy, the commute... afterwards we went to the Taiwan Economic and Cultural Office on 2nd and 47th St. to renew some passports. All in all an OK day... hope Gongzhu's having fun celebrating w/her family...
June 24th, 2002
Today i quit my gritty job petitioning for Jimmy Meng. Jimmy's going for representing the Flushing District in the NY State Assembly. There are numerous reasons i feel he is not going to get it... but they mostly center on him not having enough experience and poorly marketing himself. The organization they're putting up to get him on the ballot and elected is jus too disorganized.
Anyways, forget about Jimmy Meng. I need to call Gongzhu soon and there's only 2 reasons i'm updating rite now. One, in response to Gongzhu's posts about her favorite season and two; Tom Hanks.
Winter's great... i think it's accurate how Anne says it amplifies moods. It really does. I feel the most isolated in winter too. Things that r alive must fight to show they are... good points =) Personally, my favorite seasons are spring and fall. It's usually nice out so i can wear minimal clothing and stuff. (not that i wear a lot in winter anyway) But it's perfect for outdoor activities i love like handball and biking. Interestingly, i like fall more because i feel it's more romantic. Actually, i think it leads to romance, since it's followed by winter. It's that time when i start feeling like i need a warm-body next to me that makes me like fall =) Sounds pretty sappy eh? Well play me in racquetball and we'll see how sappy i can get. I like spring too, cuz it means i get to go outside more w/every1. I sooooo cannot b locked up in a room if i can't help it. (did i ever mention that i'm pretty primal? ok, i'll save that for a later post) My gosh, i even love the smell of approaching fall from summer and approaching spring from winter...
I was watching the AFI (American Film Inst.) Lifetime Acheivement Award tonite. This year Tom Hanks was given the AFI Lifetime yada yada... i jus realized right there that Tom Hanks is such a good actor. My mom also pointed out the fact that so little ppl are recognized for thier work so young, while they're still in their trade. Let's think about the movies Tom Hanks have been in: Splash (tho i only saw it on the plane to Mississippi from Taiwan when i was 2), Apollo 13, Saving Private Ryan, Sleepless In Seattle, You've Got Mail, Castaway, Forrest Gump... a pretty impressive filmography... Tom Hanks certainly gets my respect for acting... which also reminds me of how i was thinking the past few days in kaoroke that singers are singers because they can sing. Every time i'm at kaoroke, i'm amazed that these songs r sung by ppl who're screaming or whispering on the verge of breathlessness.
June 16th, 2002
Waiting for pages to dl, so i might as well wait a lil longer and post some =) Grrr, the P200 chip i put in for this computer is barely noticable anymore... speed is indeed addictive.
Some funny cartoons and pics i found surfing around a while ago:
If any of you play Samurai Shodown; Mr.T vs Genjuro...
Yea, i do stupid stuff too =)
But not this stupid =P
June 6th, 2002
It's raining outside... i remember a time when i was a lil kid, and i actually had a raincoat and Transformers.. rainboots? Wow, it was so fun wearing all that so i could b all dry while i played and observed my surroundings. Standing at the edge of the road where the asphalt meets the curve, all that water rushing past my boots to the sewer grating... The incessant *tap tap tap* sounds of raindrops showering my raincoat... (it had a hood) I felt almost invincible to the elements. Now that i've grown up, i still haven't lost that yearning to feel invincible to the elements. I dunno if this explains y i dun mind cold or biking in the rain... mayb it's a different kind of fun. A more confrontational form perhaps?
Rain. Yes, another paragraph about rain... rain is so nice. It keeps everything around me green and cleans off the hball courts of all that fuggin spit.
Just a random thought, but as i was thinking about rain, i thought about bamboo. This guy in Flushing near Parsons and Holly has mad bamboo growing in his front yard. (ok, there's not much of a yard left since it's all bamboo) The bamboo is really lush, green and dense, and pretty high (around 20' i estimate)... OMG, but the best thing has gotta b the sound they make when wind blows thru them... just awesome =)
Hmmm, 1 more month of summer... i'll probably b playing rball at the Y, trying to get that 1 mo. membership. Yea yea, i jus can't wait a month for summer schl to start and play at Stony.
Hmph, in other news, the Pentium 200 system i found in the trash room next to my suite actually works! I put it in the other day, but didn't find a huge increase in speed. It's still noticibly faster tho... I guess the 32MB of RAM is the biggest bottleneck =T
Heh, Gongzhu got her own Internet domain now... for some reason, i'm excited... must b because i've never really known any1 so close w/their own domain. Yay!, i get to have some more imaginative e-mail addresses now =P
May 29th, 2002
Ahhh! SUMMER... *breathes in*.... *cough cough* goddamn ppl blowing mowed grass. Quick update... jus sitting around, seeing my Gongzhu sometimes, reading mad mags, arguing w/the financial aid office, playing some rball... have summer schl starting mid July. sux.
i may b going to MTC for a few days of the week, even tho i doubt i'll learn much anymore... been going there on breaks for over 5 years =T well, at least i'll help out...
lately, lotsa things have made me feel like growing up, as opposed to growing older. meeting Gongzhu's parents, if even not for a lil while, has given me some extra views of family relationships. Digging out my wallet my dad gave me when i was in 2nd grade and actually using it was a weird feeling. (i usually hate wallets; too many eggs, no need, big bulge, etc...) The way my parents treat me is better too, i seem to b getting yelled at less... or is my sis taking more of the brunt? =)
All in all, i can't remember a time in recent memory when time pasted faster. It's times like these when i usually worry of the future =P
May 4th, 2002
Ice cream just makes everything better =) it damn well better, since my roomie pissed me off again this morning... supposedly trying to normalize his sleep schedule. (when we don't have schl tomorrow)
This brings up of the other time when i was sleeping and Boris and Anne were silently surfing the web. My roomie comes in and then leaves. Boris then asks, "Where you going?" "Dave Lieu's; to sleep."
One must wonder how loud Boris, Anne and I were breathing, for my roomie to imply we were in any way going to inhibit his sleep.
It's pretty amazing the range of tolerances we observe in society. Some ppl just can't stand others. In the extreme end, we have documentation of some extreme Germans beating their own handicapped countrymen because they feel; how could these "weak" ppl b German? Other instances, we can see how tolerant other ppl r to constant abuse... like Rick and DaveLee =P
Anyways... for some reason i have this craving for those 25¢ drinks and chips. (BBQ Dipsy Doodles, Onion Rings, artificially flavored lime/punch/grape, etc...) It must be age creeping up one me... it's soooooo hard to find places that offer quarter dollar drinks/chips when 8 years ago, every lotto store and deli had them... dammit, the cheapest beverage on campus is 79¢ and the cheapest bag of chips is 75. fuggin inflation and Campus Dining Services suck.
April 30th, 2002
So glad this semester's almost over... damn, jus when i'm getting better at racquetball too. Heh... It wasn't my first lost to some1 over twice my age, but last Thursday's 21-4 lost was really awakening because my relatively young age and superior physical abilities were grossly negated by my opponent's experience and court savvy. haha... it was a really good night nevertheless... my most demanding and best game yet. Ed (the guy i played w/) taught me a lot stuff continuously for a good hour and a half. One of the more interesting things that would've taken me much longer to figure out had Ed not taught me was the rebound angles of the ball off the side wall on soft/hard Z serves. These days, when private coaches can command up to $2 per minute, i greatly appreciate the time he sacrificed to teach me =)
Hmmm, it feels slightly guilty that i'm updating here when i jus read Elaine's recent post... heh, sorry Elaine... e-mail ya soon!
Stupider news; my present roomie i really causing much displeasure. He's too comfortably selfish. Tonight when Anne and I were gonna watch some TV, He asked how long it was gonna take. Then he went on a break for that exact time estimate we gave him. (by jus going to the opposite room in the suite) *shrug* He already knows we were using earphones. This is jus one instance, there have been many others. He seems to forget he doesn't own a single or too used to the fact that he almost already has one. Anyways, that's all the crap tonite...
April 23rd, 2002
Yay! It is done... i jus ~had~ to post something to feel better rite after =)
April 22nd, 2002
Why the hell is this here? Cuz i'm gonna attempt to reverse (chronologically) the order of entries on this godawfullylong page... Y?, u ask? Well, it's to better accomodate my readers and save them some time... heh, i'm too nice. It's ok, if i fail some class, i'll jus blame it on u guys =P
I kno it's looking pretty funky rite now... please b patient... my attn. span for doing this isn't too long =) O, and i'm making the text for the 'date' of my entries white for easier reading....
April 19th, 2002
it's fuggin hot in this fuggin room... i'm so glad showering is so convenient in a dorm. even better that our shower is so high pressure, there's visible recoil of the shower head from the water =)
April 13th, 2002
Geez, 2 tests coming up real soon... i dunno y i'm not trying hard enough given the immense pride i have for the accomplishments of the human race. perhaps i'll explain later...
April 5th, 2002
I love this Google Toolbar!
March 28th, 2002
I decided to name my black lab "Paws". We've been suprised it can actually stand, and it has pretty big feet. They're lil beads in his feet, and nowhere else. heh, Paws should meet Nuts, my Beanie Baby Squirrel =P Thanks to every1 who gave suggestions...
Hmmm, i jus noticed it's been a year since the "geezer talk". Time is flying by. Chuing's rite, we're old geezers now. Look at me, i'm already wearing grandpa glasses =)
O yea, i forgot to post it before... watch Ice Age! It's a really well made movie. The animation's not as "3D" as something like Toy Story 2 or Monsters Inc., but i dun think that was the point and focus of the animation. The animation is more creative, in a way that isn't as boring as merely simulating common real life environments. The humor's simple and elegant for kids, and also appealing for older ppl. Voice acting was once of the strong points too, and add to the already characterizing visuals on screen.
Grrr, on a stupider note, my sister's floppy drive died last nite. I dun think this is worth mentioning. But i'll mention it anyways cuz i'm a stupid sagwa.. =) (plus, it really pissed me off last night)
March 27th, 2002
Oy, spring break... w/the threat of a massive hw pileup and 2nd rd. of midterms looming. fuck. shit, i jus cursed... o wells...
in other crappy news, i miss my gongzhu =*( o wait, ta yao nie wo... hmoph =) heh, got me a black labrador on her visit to her friend Becky's dorm at Trinity... i need to name it! Was thinking about naming it coco (since it's a black lab anyways)... but i thought a name i use in CS jus isn't fitting for man's best friend. Some of the suggestions i got from my insomniac friends online were 'lucky' (it's named "Lucky Lab" on the tag), 'grim reaper' (??), 'notorious d.o.g.', 'grizzly' (after the proud navy tradition of naming diesel submarines aggressive words?), 'boner'(it was 2:30am), and 'fobbie' (it's made in China)... hahaha, i was even wondering about combining my friend's name and mine; but i got 'dung' =P
wow, this is harder than i thought. i'm taking this seriously as if it were a real dog... *grrr*... need a name... name!..... (speaking of name... i'm looking for a male dog's name... which reminds me, i really should replace the red bow tie collar it has on now somehow)
*sigh*, mayb if i sleep with it tonite, i'll think of a name in the morning...
nitenites =)
March 11th, 2002
So much time! So lil work! wut's a bright college student to do?!
Blah... some cool guy down at the rball courts a few days ago actually taught me some backhand ceiling shots, awfully kind of him =) It's so tough to whip a "backward" backhand... grrr... if i can jus get my backhand whips to execute naturally... i could at least return vertically down left wall shots and low left ground serves w/some consistency and power. Need more practice...Supposed to play at least 4 days outta the week anyways... but ehhhh- o wells. At least i'm going...
One thing that pissed me off this afternoon, was the receptionist in clinic 5W at NYU Dental. She must've been on the verge of exhaustion, cuz she was really slow in responses and hung me up (to get some rest?) after i said 'pardon?' to her really weak voice. (?!) This is behaviour i expect when it's closing time on Friday w/the flu... Quality service ppl r jus so rare these days. I'm so glad it's not jus my schl that has such crappy service =)
In other news, i started working RSP (Residential Safety Program) last Saturday nite... it's not bad... at least i have the dead nights of Friday and Saturday, so i could get some reading in.... for schl that is.... mostly. RSP's pretty cool, it's efficient and has a friendly work environment. And i'm working towards enhancing our saftey on campus. I thought things run mostly by students would've had a great potential for disaster... it's good to b suprised.
March 3rd, 2002
Jus finished reading "Say Goodnight, Gracie", a novel by Julie Reece Deaver. My sis recommended it, saying how it was only fair after i recommended her read "Where The Red Fern Grows" by Wilson Rawls. "Say Goodnight, Gracie" is a really great book. It parallels w/the wrenching of "Where The Red Fern Grows" and concentrates a lil more on the part after the "big event" in these novels... I wish no1 has to go thru the things these characters, and dogs =), have to go thru... but they're parts of life. Go read the books, we highly recommend them =P
Mayb i'm jus growing up... mayb i'm jus thinking i am, mayb i'm already grown up, mayb i'm already grown up jus thinking i'm not; but for some reason now when i read fiction.. pretty much any fic, after i finish reading the book... i sit there and think about it for a good while. Perhaps it's the stories and themes about these books. I dunno.
This rarely happens to me after i watch movies... or does it? Now that i think about it, lately i've been watching a lot of thought provoking movies... "GATTACA"... 'tree hugging strong female roled' OVAs like "Mononoke Hime", "Nausicaa", and "Laputa"... war doc./movies like "Black Hawk Down"... even something i've seen yet again a dozen and a half times; "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"... I'm sitting there thinking about the movie. The msgs. they aim to convey and how it semi-links to my life. I guess i can thank Anne for making me watch these w/her =)
Wut thoughts r going thru my head rite after i watch movies and finish reading novels?
Wouldn't you like to know.....
February 28th, 2002
interesting.. finding out my D&D character. jus the other day, Igs gave me a link to find out my gun =) P90, MP5, and then M4/M203 for those of u who must kno... i think this D&D thingy is more accurate... i'm jus not a P90... so they say:
I Am A: Neutral Good Elf Ranger Paladin
Alignment:
Neutral Good characters believe in the power of good above all else. They will work to make the world a better place, and will do whatever is necessary to bring that about, whether it goes for or against whatever is considered 'normal'.
Race:
Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently conccern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existance.
Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.
Secondary Class:
Paladins are the Holy Warriors. They have been chosen by a God/dess to be their representative on Earth, and must follow the code of that deity, or risk severe penalties. They tend towards being righteous, but not generally to excess.
Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of
NeppyMan (e-mail)ewww... i hate big blobs of code all in lower case =P heh, nothing much to say on the last day of february... life's going ok... after my 830 test tonite anyways... o wells, gonna go surf and snack... after i study of course. uh huh.
March 2rd, 2002
GRRRR, i was supposed to go home this weekend to get mad stuff... which would make our lives more comfortable here in the middle of nowhere... my parents r under the impression i have a shitload of work to do (which is true, but i can handle it!, honest...) haha
o yea, i jus found out my webpage is registered by Google. you can find this place by jus searching for "falcon741w" =)
February 27th, 2002
Mmmmmm~ food...
February 17th, 2002
i'm hungry...
February 6th, 2002
Grrr.. 8 in the morning.. class in 3 hours =T my skateboard isn't seeing much action. Anne's on foot.. and ppl look at me funny =)
Roomie's lappie got stolen this week. It really bites when u think about thefts against individuals.. it hits harder. Every1 watch out.. stupid as it is, safety really comes first.
I will most likely b dyeing my hair purple sometime... i can't say i was inspired or wutever by Shampoo... but i'm also bored.. and my parents would have fun. Ok then... nitenites! =)
January 27th, 2002
Blah... the Lego (not Legolas) section is turning out so bad... i think the only pt. of it is that i like it =)
Mad work these days... big bad books ganging up on me. Actually hafta read the stuff before class... My skateboard is only giving me an extra 10 minutes of sleep only 2 days outta the week too =T
January 23rd, 2002
hahahahahha... the pic above proved so popular... that i've decided to give the people wut they want =) These pics have been on geocities for some time, but jus not linked..... y i joined fencing , WINs age 17, after wetting the bed , me, JHS yearbook photo , 7th gr. 'save our harbor' poster contest at the WTC =T , me age 2, at restaurant in Taiwan that my parents frequented ,
Moving along to bxsci =) ..... DaveLee and Herky Bird, uhhh- on the steps... , Monkey see monkey do: Al, me, Igs, and Shaunna hanging =).
These three are BxSci graduation pics, at the glorious arena where our local basketball/hockey teams dominate: my sis couldn't make it, tho i kno she would've enjoyed it =T (geez, i had this weird jus graduated look), who's Chang Sr.? , and -haha.. after my parents told me to smile more =)
Ahhh handball.. unfortunately, this is only some our valued group. From left: Wei Q., DavePark (kinda behind Weiq's grande cabeza.. jp), DaveLieu, me, Han-Ching, Jessica, and MikeJ..)
They made us sit in the gym for some reason; my black homey... Bobby (jp, it's jus really dark there), Sherrell, Albort, Mike, Lelei.
Emily and me , there for me for so long...
Big group photo after we watched Titan AE in Astoria. (From top left, then bottom row: DaveLee, Carrie, Errol, Karen, Lucy, Sherrell, Florence, Michelle, MikeJiang, Lelei, and a girl i dunno =) Albert and mayb Jackie are standing behind me...)
Ehhh, that's about it for the stuff around rite now.. there should b more i suppose... chucked into some album or something... I guess i'll scan them some time. If any1 has any pictures they'd like me to post up, please drop me an e-mail or IM me =)
January 22nd, 2002
i'm in my freakin dorm... the net jus went up. And nicely up too; almost 1MB/sec now =P haha, maybe i'll do better this year.. hahaha.
I was backing up all the essential files for my computer when i migrated OS yet again, and found a lot of pics i forgot about. I was gonna integrate it into my mememe.html page, but i figured no1 chks there anyways, since i don't even.. so here's a nice pic for u guys: 4 Angels, age 11 O and you also may have noticed that i changed my mainpage.html... the modified falcon pic is from mechwarrior2, jade falcon clan =)
Use this 'banner' version of the falcon pic to link to my site. i kno i kno... it's about time i made one =T
January 15th, 2002
Errr, happy new years? Long time me not write here... and for good reason too. I was being butt lazy.. haven't done much this break. Went to C-town to karoake and eat tonite.. met some new ppl =) Pretty fun... Elaine brought along her friends from NYU and Stuy (another Dave in the crowd too), while i basically only knew her... and Vincent, who came along jus for me mostly. (tho he really wanted my CS CD =) heh)
Meeting in front of NYU Stern's... we went to this Karoake place next to a door labelled "karoake champ" and sang some fun songs; "In the end" (which actually sounds pretty good in chorus), "u've lost that lovin' feelin'" (i kno, me and my old songs), "twinkle twinkle little star" (hahaha), and some other Mandarin/Cantonese songs (i jus dunno the names!). We proceeded to a Cantonese restaurant, where we were all starving. =) Every1 ordered meat.. haha, and i got the 'beef chow fun' thingy (noodles and beef thing so popular in take outs). I also ordered a bowl of rice, cuz for some reason.. if i dun eat rice, i feel like i didn't eat substantially *shrug*. We talked about student employment and girl/guy fat buildup/loss areas for a while. These interesting topics continued as we went to "Green Tea Cafe". I got a cool coconut drink (dun look at me like that..). A girl got this peanut pancake which i'm not familiar w/and hesitated to try. We all talked til like 10... it's interesting to meet totally different ppl.. infusion of convos =)
Got Serial Experiments Lain from eLAINe too. Had mixed reviews by friends since so i'm gonna finally chk it out myself =) hmm, which reminds me... i wanna record Shaolin Temple before schl starts. But my video cables are in my dorm =( hmmm, would i even have access to my bldg.?
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