Caribbean Hitchcraft

A Fill-In-The-Titles Puzzle
The titles of all 61 films of Alfred Hitchcock have been woven into the text of the following story. But 49 titles have been blanked out, with the other 12 still hidden in plain sight. Can you fill in the 49 blanks and locate the remaining 12? Some titles span from one phrase or sentence to the next, but all of the words in each title are presented together in consecutive order. Punctuation should be ignored. Initial articles ("The," "A," and "An") have been omitted whenever they occur. Numbers after the blanks tell how many letters (or in one case, numeric digits) are in each word of the title. One title appears twice because Hitchcock filmed it twice. Names and other references from Hitchcock's films are included just for fun. Consider only the syntax and general (non-Hitchcockian) meanings of the sentences surrounding the blanks to help you solve each title by context.
Be sure to scroll down until THE END.
CARIBBEAN HITCHCRAFT

I picked up the phone and answered, "Bon aventure!  Malgache speaking, Kingston Police." It had been a particularly fine New Year's morning, with a lovely warm breeze wafting in from Montego Bay. Little did I know that I was just now being called upon __ _____ _ ____ (2,5,1,5), if I could find the larcenous culprit.

"Inspector, this is Sgt. Elstree calling. I'm afraid you're needed downtown near the ocean front. There's been a bar fight, and some jewelry has gone missing. One of the tourists involved is fabulously ____, ___ _______  (4,3,7) events shroud the incident in mystery."

"Which bar do you mean, Elstree?"

"It's a pub called Juno and the Paycock, just across from McKittrick's Hotel. Do you know it?"

"Yes, I'll be right there." I hung up the phone. Then for no reason, I lifted the receiver again and absentmindedly started to ____ _, ___ _____ (4,1,3,6) was on my mind. ______ (6) ? Why was that? This case wasn't a homicide at all. But nonetheless my happy morning reverie had been ruined, and I felt a lethal resentment. Not really needing to call anyone, I grumped to myself and slammed down the phone.

Minutes later, I walked into the pub to investigate the _______. ____ _____ (7,4,5) Belafonte blaring over the music system, this Calypso-nostalgic watering hole was normally a popular spot for American tourists. But what I found this morning was an unholy mess, as if a roomful of goons had gotten into a chair-breaking contest over each others' backs.

"Just take a look at this, mate," the barman call from the back wall of the bar, pointing to the shattered ____ ______ (4,6) with its shreds of ____ _______ (4,7) swaying in the breeze. "We're going to have all kinds of ____ (5) flying in through this broken glass. How am I supposed to run a bar like this?"

"And who might you be, my good fellow?"

"Oh, sorry. Paradine's the name. I own this pub, what's left of it, and I tend the bar most nights."

"That's a peculiar accent, Paradine. What are you, an Irishman, Welshman?"

"No, I'm a _______ (7)."

"Ah, from the Isle of  ___. ___ ___? ___ ____! (3,3,4,3,4)" I winced at my outdated colloquialisms. "In between, then. Between Ireland and Wales, that is."

"Between Ireland and England heading due east. From Wales it's ____ __ _________ (5,2,9)."

"Oh, right. Um...why don't you tell me what happened here?"

"It was last night just past 11:30. We had a big New Year's Eve crowd, and the place was mighty lively, I can tell you that. Then in comes this icy blonde, real dangerous type, you know? So what does this saucy vixen do? She announces, 'It's my birthday. I'm turning __,' _____ (2,5) up to the bar, and orders _________ (9) for the house. Well, I'd just popped the corks on five bottles, when in comes her gent, an older fellow, and he tells her he won't pay for it. So I'm out five bottles of high-priced bubbly, and I'm just about to give 'em both the heave-ho when she starts laying into him herself. 'Go back to Kansas to your corn and wheat fields,' she says. 'I wouldn't be a _______ ____(7,4) no matter how wealthy you are. And I bet this ____ (4) of yours is a fake, isn't it?' Then she takes it off her finger and throws it at him. So he says, 'Did you think that little birthday present meant an engagement? Sweetheart, I'm a happily married man. My wife doesn't care if I fool with the likes of you.' Then she says, 'Do you always tell your wife? She's the one with the real money, isn't she? How surprised will your dear Mary be in a few minutes when I give her a call, and how broke will you be when she throws you out?' Well, it wasn't long before they were in it tooth and nails. And then she flips, I mean, really goes ______(6),takes a chair and tosses it through that back glass. And before you know it, the whole crowd gets caught up in a chair-breaking brawl like sharks in a feeding _____(6). This," he pointed to the wreckage, "was the result. She's ruined me, that little ________(8)!" 

"Now, now, Paradine. Case you didn't know it, ________(8) is a different crime altogether, usually against an employer's goods or equipment. This looks more like vandalism, but hardly the crime you mentioned."

"Well, anyway, I want you to go over to McKittrick's and arrest her. She's still there, I've seen her. Her and him both, but not together, you know what I mean?"

"What's this about stolen jewelry."

"Oh, that. Well, the fight gets going really good, and the next thing you know, the ____ ________ (4,8) into thin air. And then her agricultural sugar daddy announces that he's missing the solitaire. He says we all witnessed her giving it back -- flung it in his face, more like --and that makes it his, and he wants it. So I guess he'll want you to charge her for knicking it. None of my concern. I just want my bar back the way it was."

"Can you describe the missing item?"

"I didn't see it very clearly, but it looked like a thin gold band with a diamond mounted on it. Big hunk of a rock, too!"

Just then, Sgt. Elstree came in. "Ah, Elstree. Could you please take Mr. Paradine's statement while I question some of the folks across the street? He's from the Isle of Wight, you know!"

Paradine shouted, " _____! ___! (5,3)"

"Ah, yes, Isle of __. ___ ____? ___ ____!" (3,3,4,3,4) I had to stop saying that! Just then the Belafonte ended, and on came an album of Austrian polkas and _______. "____ ______(7,4,6)? Strauss and other composers from that city?"

"New Year's crowd enjoys it," Paradine shrugged. "Not that we'll have any today. Blaney! Shut off that bleedin' music!" he shouted into the back room. I left.

McKittrick's Hotel was perhaps the most picturesque little hotel in all of ______. ___ (7,3) would be a better description, or actually boarding house since they usually kept a year-round ______ (6) or two in addition to their transient guests. I was greeted in the lobby by a kindly old lady.  "Luncheon will be served in 45 minutes. Fresh crab for your dining _______, ______ (8,6) peas and carrots on the side."

"Sorry, I'm here on police business." I flashed my credentials, and her smile disappeared. "Ms...?"

"Valdes. Carlotta Valdes. How may I help you, Inspector?"

"What can you tell me about your guests, those who were here last night?"

"Well, let's see.  We're a little shy of business this year, since the highway moved away, you know. We have our regular tenant, Mr. Garmes in number 13. Then next to him in 15, that nice couple from Milwaukee, __ ___ ___ _____ (2, 3, 3, 5), and their three lovely kids.  You know the name. Like Jimmy Stewart in that movie when he went to Washington?"

"Oh, yes, I know the name. It's very common. Who else?"

"Beyond them in ______ _________ (6,9), my, oh my, that pair! Those two have been nothing but trouble since they checked in. Flusky his name is. Sam Flusky. And she's something else. I mean, she's some other name, not even married to him. And I just found out that he is. Not to her I mean, to his own wife. Well, of course who else would he be married to, but really! In my hotel? With those kids next door? It's not right, it's just not right! I am at the end of my ____ (4)!"

"So they're both staying in that same room?"

"Not any more, they're not! This morning he up and asks me to put him in another room. They had a disagreement, it seems, and he doesn't want to be near her. So I put him in number 11 at the other end of the hall from her. It won't be a minute too soon when they're gone, the both of them! Whatever you want them for, I'm sure they did it, beyond a ______ __ _ _____(6,2,1,5)."

Starting at the high-numbered end of the hall, I knocked on the mysterious woman's door. "Come in, my bags are ready."  I went in. "You're not the bellman," she remarked.

I said nothing for a moment, but stood entranced, enraptured, __________ (10) by her perilous beauty. She seemed to gaze down from a stormy peak, and up that rugged ________, _____ (8,5) Scouts would not dare to climb. Too dizzying a height for me as well, merit badges or not, and it was already bringing on an acrophobic case of _______ (7). I wanted to dress her in gray, in a particular gray suit I had seen, and pull back her ashen hair into a tight twist.

"Sir, who are you?" she said at last, and broke the spell. I looked again, and suddenly she seemed rather ordinary.

"Uhh...Inspector Malgache, Kingston Police. And you?"

"_______ (7) Burgoyne. But you can call me Becky."

"I'm here about the brawl last night in the pub across the street. And the disappearance of a valuable piece of jewelry."

"Oh, that. Don't worry, Sammy will take care of it."

"Sammy? Sam Flusky? Aren't you two split up?"

"Oh, no, not really. That's just part of the plan. You see, we staged that whole scene for his wife's benefit. We're to be married after the pre-nup runs out ."

"Explain that."

"See, she has the money, and she made him sign a pre-nuptial agreement. She knew his past, you see. He had always been known for his affairs, a truly _________(9) womanizer. And she had used that against him, and extorted him into signing. It was a form of _________(9), he was under such duress. His finances were so desperately drained, he had to sign to get her to marry him. Her money saved him, like a ________ (8) or raft to a man overboard. But after five years...that's next week...the pre-nup expires and community property kicks in. Then he can divorce her and take half of what's hers. Unfortunately, she found out about us, and he has to stall her until then."

"Won't she still throw him out too early because of your relationship?"

"Oh, no. She doesn't really mind him fooling around, as long as it's nothing serious. That part was true. But even a hint, even the vaguest _________ (9) that he might be leaving her would be enough to ruin everything. So we had to stage this very public break-up to throw her off guard. As far as she's concerned, Sammy and I were just _________ __ _ _____ (9,2,1,5) that passed in the night."

"I think the usual expression is 'ships,' but if railway imagery suits you better, so be it.  And you think it's going to work?"

Playfully, she tossed me a newspaper. "You tell me. Read my horoscope, right there _____ _________ (5,9)."

"The goat, eh? That's right, New Year's Day is your birthday, isn't it?" I tossed the paper aside on the bed table.  "Well, I must say, the two of you certainly seem to enjoy...what?...an elastic affair! It stretches to fit the pressures of the moment. Maybe not such a bad match after all." Money-grubbing and adulterous as it is, I thought silently. "But explain this. How does it help your cause for the diamond to go missing?"

"The diamond? Oh, it's not diamond, it's _____ (5)."

"But aren't they orange? This one was described as a diamond, which is clear."

"Some are orange or yellow, some blue, some clear like mine. And yes, it's still mine...wait...did you say missing? My birthday present is missing?"

"Mr. Flusky has reported it stolen. In fact, he accused you of stealing it last night after you left the pub."

Suddenly, her face turned a livid red. "Sammy!" she yelled, stalking out the door and down the hall to his room. She pounded on his door, still yelling, "Sammy! You let me in! Where's my present? You promised me. You promised it was mine!" This was certainly no babe in the woods here, not at all _____ ___ ________ (5,3,8), neither tender in years nor naïve of outlook. I recalled the age she had announced at the bar, and wondered how many returns of that same age she was celebrating this year.

The door opened, and a man who could only be Sam Flusky peered out. "Quiet, Bexy! We have to stick to the plan. Garmes is here, and so are Marnie and..." Then he saw me and stopped short. I showed my papers. He blushed.

"Why don't we all go inside and talk," I suggested, rather peremptorily, and Flusky meekly opened the door. The man with the badge frequently gets his way in these matters.

Seated to one side of the room was the youngish couple from room 15 who introduced themselves as Marnie and Edgar, with their three kids, Lisa, Carol, and Fremont. The little ones retired to a far corner and immersed themselves in play, not a part of the grown-up goings on at all.  Also present was an urbane and middle-aged fellow sporting a small beard, wearing a smoking jacket and beret. "I'm Garmes," he said, "a reporter, actually a _______ _____________ (7,13) filing international stories for a U.S newspaper conglomerate. I'm also the permanent tenant in the next room."

I took them all in, filed away my first impressions, and then returned to the host of this present room. "Well, Flusky," I remarked. "Your little scheme seems to have gone awry. The jewel is missing, is it not."

"Yes, it is. It really is. I knew my Bexy didn't take it. But someone in the crowd asked to see it, and when I couldn't find it, I couldn't think how else to cover. Sorry, sweetie." She smiled back at him.

"We'll come back to that. Answer this first of all. What was the brawl all about?"

"That was unintentional," Flusky answered, glancing at the woman he called Bexy.

"Yeah, that was me," she said. "I got a little excited. I've never tried to perform in front of an audience before, and I just got all nervous and overdid it. Next thing I knew, a chair was flying through a big glass pane, and I was the one that had thrown it."

"You mean," I answered, "the whole fight and all those damages erupted out of actor's jitters, an extreme case of _____ ______ (5,6)?"

"Afraid so." Now she was the one blushing. Sam pressed her hand. They really were in love.

"Don't worry, Inspector. I've already settled with Paradine."

I took out my cell phone and switched into walkie-talkie mode. "Malgache calling Elstree. Over." A crackle answered back, "Elstree here. Over."

"Sergeant, you're very faint. Where are you? Over."

"Helping out in the prison watchtower. Over."

"Tomorrow, Elstree, find out if Paradine has withdrawn his claim for damages. Over."

"Done, sir, quarter of an hour ago. Over."

"Very good. Over and out." I returned my attention to the group in the room. "That leaves the matter of the missing gem."

Garmes pointed to Marnie and Edgar, "Inspector, have you examined these people? Maybe they have the missing stone."

"Well, I like that!" Marnie retorted. "You are a bad man, a very bad, bad man! It's like my daddy used to say, vice is ____, ______  (4,6) is hard." And Edgar added, "Yeah, a man's character, like water, runs ________ (8), not up."

"Come now, Garmes," I retorted, "Look at the five of them...father, mother, kids. Could such an adorable ______ ____ (6,4) such a foul deed?" I thought again. "Hmm...On second thought, I guess stranger things have happened, but somehow I have other ideas. Flusky, I was wondering. Why did you come to our island of all places to stage your little scene? How was your wife supposed to find out?"

"By video, Inspector. Meet my man, Caldicott." He pointed to Edgar, who handed me a card that read "Edgar Caldicott, Tropical Charters and Private Investigations."

"Caldicott was in the crowd with a hidden camera. Mary thinks he's working for her. But he really works for me. And here's the proof." He held up a small memory card, the kind that goes in a digital video camera. In a flash, Garmes leapt to grab the video, but I was ready for him. Locking him in a secure wrestling hold, I muscled the small man back into his chair, towering over him to keep him from bolting again. "Better sit still, Garmes. Or should I say, Vandamm?"

"Vandamm?" everyone else gasped, as I ripped away "Garmes's" beard and beret and the wig under it to reveal a wizened and mousy visage well known to law enforcement the length and breadth of the island.

"Meet Leonard Vandamm, one time ______ _____ (6,5) for a clandestine international espionage syndicate, occasional con man, and frequent sneak thief and pickpocket. Well, Leonard old boy, I haven't seen you since you were working the old skin game at the casino. It's been years, but your little disguise didn't fool me for a moment." I tossed the puny accoutrements aside. The cornered criminal said nothing.

I went on, "Let's see that video of yours, Caldicott." Vandamm tried to rise to make his escape, but he could not evade my grasp. Edgar Caldicott connected his camera to the hotel's TV set, and before long we saw the interior of the pub as it had been prior to the devastation I had witnessed earlier. In the video, Ms. Burgoyne had just flung the jewel at her beloved Sam Flusky, and after a few heated words which were almost verbatim as Paradine had related them to me, she grabbed a chair and flung it through the back glass. At that moment, a small wizened rodent of a man could be seen slipping a sly finger into Flusky's pocket, and after a momentary glint of light flared in the camera's lens, both he and the pilfered item were out the front door.

"All right, _ _______ (1,7), I did it," Vandamm admitted. "You've got me dead to rights." He reached toward his jacket pocket, but I intercepted him. He raised his hands aside, and I fished through the pocket to find a tiny circlet of gold with a huge clear gem attached.

"This, I presume, is yours," I handed it over to Ms. Burgoyne. She squealed with delight and slipped it onto her finger. The acquisitive lovers were lost in a world of their own for a time. I proceeded to cuff Vandamm, and accepted Caldicott's offer to help me escort him to the station house. "Much appreciated, Caldicott. To the rest of you as you journey homeward in the coming days, I wish you Bon Voyage!"

THE END
Caribbean Hitchcraft

See also...
