Index
Some Myths About Domestic Violence

MYTH 1
Domestic violence does not affect many people.

FACT

A woman is beaten every 15 seconds. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Report to the nation on Crime and Justice. The Data. Washington DC Office of Justice Program, US Dept. of Justice. Oct 1983)

Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between ages 15 and 44 in the united States - more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. (Uniform Crime Reports, Federal Bureau of Investigation, 1991)

Battered women are more likely to suffer miscarriages and to give birth to babies with low birth weights. (Surgeon General, United States, 1992)

Sixty-three percent of the young men between the ages of 11 and 20 who are serving time for homicide have killed their mother's abuser. (March of Dimes, 1992)

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MYTH 2

Battering is only a momentary loss of temper.

FACT

Battering is the establishment of control and fear in a relationship through violence and other forms of abuse. The batterer uses acts of violence and a series of behaviors, including intimidation, threats, psychological abuse, isolation, etc. to coerce and to control the other person. The violence may not happen often, but it remains as a hidden (and constant) terrorizing factor.
(Uniform Crime Reports, Federal Bureau of Investigation, 1990)

"One in five women victimized by their spouses or ex-spouses report they had been victimized over and over again by the same person." (The Basics of Batterer Treatment, Common Purpose, Inc., Jamaica Plain, MA)

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MYTH 3
Domestic violence only occurs in poor, urban areas.

FACT
Women of all cultures, races, occupations, income levels, and ages are battered - by husbands, boyfriends, lovers and partners.
(Surgeon General Antonia Novello, as quoted in Domestic Violence: Battered Women, publication of the Reference Department of the Cambridge Public Library, Cambridge, MA)

Approximately one-third of the men counseled (for battering) at Emerge are professional men who are well respected in their jobs and their communities. these have included doctors, psychologists, lawyers, ministers, and business executives.(For Shelter and Beyond, Massachusetts Coalition of Battered Women Service Groups, Boston, MA 1990)

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MYTH 4

Domestic violence is just a push, slap or punch - it does not produce serious injuries.

FACT
Battered women are often severely injured - 22 to 35 percent of women who visit medical emergency rooms are there for injuries related to ongoing partner abuse.
(David Adams, "Identifying the Assaultive Husband in Court: You be the Judge." Boston Bar Journal, 33-4, July/August 1989)

One in four pregnant women have a history of partner violence. (Journal of the American Medical Association, 1992)

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MYTH 5
It is easy for battered women to leave their abuser.

FACT
Women who leave their batterers are at a 75% greater risk of being killed by the batterer than those who stay. (Barbara Hart, National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 1988)

Nationally, 50 percent of all homeless women and children are on the streets because of violence in the home.
(Senator Joseph Biden, U.S. Senate Committee on the Judiciary, Violence Against Women: Victims of the System, 1991)

There are nearly three times as many animal shelters in the United States as there are shelters for battered women and their children.
(Senate Judiciary Hearings, Violence Against Women Act, 1990)

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More Myths about Domestic Violence/Wife Abuse

I want to clear up some of the "Myths of Wife Abuse".
This needs to be done due to society's beliefs that states the following:

MYTH STATMENT:
1) She must like it if she stays

RESPONSE: FALSE

No one enjoys being beaten. This is a fact no one should have to explain, but for some reason, this is what most people believe.

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STATMENT:
2) She must be doing something wrong for her husband to do this.

RESPONSE:FALSE

No one does anything that wrong that they would deserve a beating for. Abusers are the problem, not the victims.

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STATMENT:
3) She probably came from a family that abused her and is used to it.

RESPONSE:FALSE

No one deserves to be beaten no matter what they've done. Do not let society or the abusers convince you that any one deserves a beating, or any other form of violence.

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STATEMENT:
4) Maybe this is the only life she has known.

RESPONSE: FALSE

Some women have grown up in an abusive family and think that this is normal and accept it, but this is NOT NORMAL.
No one has to accept it.

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STATEMENT:
5) I'd never take it and I don't know anyone who would.

RESPONSE: FALSE

Anyone can become a victim and you do not know if your neighbor or your friend, colleague at work, or even a relative is an abused wife.
Most victims do not tell anyone and if they do tell, sometimes the responses aren't helpful and so they stay and learn very quickly not to say anything.
They will have excellent excuses for any marks that do show but most abused wives hide any marks they have. So you can never know if a person you know is being abused. Never say it can't happen to you. It can and does happen to very smart and intelligent women. Women who would tell you that they never believed it could happen to them.

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STATEMENT:
6) If this happened to me, I'd call the police and divorce him right away.

RESPONSE:FALSE

This can happen to you and does happen to many women who think that it won't. And calling the police and divorcing him are two things that victims don't do until they are healthy and well. Once they are, calling the police and divorcing him are two things that they will do. Until that time though, they do not consider these as options.

Hopefully, I have cleared up some of the myths that most people say in conversations and in talks. I wanted to put these myths to rest so that anyone coming here, will know that these are myths and not reality.

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