Sailor Dorks
By: Merc
Chapter 3
Narrator: Okay then, to get on with this, the generals later
worked out a delightful little plan to torture and then kill the Sailor
Scouts once and for all. That is, with the help of their new "secret" weapon.
Meanwhile, the scouts are not having a scout meeting, but rather just hanging
around doing nothing at Raye's temple for no particular reason what so
ever (plot
hole!). Just then, Artemis runs up the stairs screaming bloody murder.
Artemis: IT'S THE APOCOLYPS, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Luna: ARTEMIS CALM DOWN!!!
Artemis: IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: (Singing) and I feel fine…
Serena: (Sarcastically) hardy har har, very funny Lita.
Luna: Take a deep breath Artemis.
Artemis: (Scared out of his mind shakily takes a "very" deep
breath) uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Luna: Good, now exhale.
Artemis: (Shakily exhaling) Whoooooooooooooosh!!!
Luna: Good, now, tell us about the apocalypse.
Artemis: Well, I, uh, well you see, uh, the, uh, Negaverse is,
uh, at it again.
Luna: Is that all?
Artemis: What do you mean is that all!?!?!?
Luna: Scouts?
Serena: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and no.
Luna: Why the nine no's?
Serena: I'm answering for everybody.
Luna: Well, in that case, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,
yes, and yes.
Serena: Smarty Cat.
Luna: Humph.
Amy: Well Artemis, where's the Negaverse hit this time?
Artemis: Uh, they hit over in Pokesta Park.
Raye: &©#@!
Mina: What's wrong Raye?
Raye: That's my favorite park! It's much more clean and Nega-free
than Mayfair Park.
Mina: I've never been there.
Raye: Been where?
Mina: Pokesta Park.
Raye: Oh, you really ought to go there sometime. It's nice and
peaceful there.
Mina: I guess I'll have to go and check it out sometime then.
Luna: Sometime? Try now!
Haruka: Yo Luna, don't blow a gasket now!
Michiru: Really!
Setsuna: We'll go, don't worry.
Hotaru: Uh, yea Luna, don't spaz out.
Luna: Ugh.
Lita: Well, are we going or not?
Serena: We're not.
Luna: (At the end of her rope) you…will…go…
Serena: Not a chance, fur-brain.
Luna: I'll…give…you…till…the…count…of…five…
Serena: Then what? You'll use your spayed paws to tickle me?
Luna: Five…
Serena: *Yawn*
Luna: Four…
Serena: Dum de dum de dum…
Luna: Three…
Serena: *Whistle*
Luna: Two…
Serena: (Humming) hmm hmm hmmmmmmm…
Luna: One…
Serena: *Cough* *cough*
Luna: ZERO!!! (Battle cry) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Serena: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: OH MY GOD, LUNA'S KILLING SERENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Serena: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *deep breath*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Luna: (Panting) My *pant* claws *pant* may *pant* be *pant*
spayed… but my teeth are as sharp as ever *pant*!
Serena: (Moaning) Uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…
Haruka: LUNA YOU RETARD!!! THAT'S OUR LEADER YOU JUST ANIALATED!!!
Luna: Your point being…
Haruka: @#$%^&*©)™®*&^%$#@!©™®LJ:P!!!
Everyone: !
Reeny: AMY!!!
Amy: What?
Reeny: She said a bunch of bad words! Go destroy her motorcycle!
Amy: Sounds good to me, I need the parts.
Haruka: Lay a finger on my bike and I'll turn you into street
pizza.
Amy: Watch out, I'm tougher than you think.
Haruka: Oh yea?
Amy: Yea!
Michiru: This isn't the time, Haruka.
Lita: Lay a finger on Amy and I'll turn you into mincemeat!
Haruka: Oh yea?
Lita: Yea!
Michiru: ALL RIGHT YOU THREE, BREAK IT UP!!!
Lita, Haruka, and Amy: !
Mina: Are we there yet?
Chapter 4