Authors Notes: Okay, I'm on to part 2! I've had
it done forever, I just wanted you all to suffer! He he he, it's been know
to get readers this way, so tune in next week for part 3! In case you forgot,
there's a part 4, and I finally finished part 5! What's even better for
all you peoples is that I'm currently on part 6. Yay! Well, that's all
from me, enjoy the story!
Dedications:
Rissa/Mizuno Ami: All the way, her series "For The Love Of Mercury"
is so totally awesome! Sailor Mercury is my favorite scout and the story
is about her, so any Ami fans had better read it! And that doesn't' mean
that you Ami fans shouldn't read it, this girl is incredible at writing!
Serena/Tsukino Serena: Another awesome series here! Hers is
called "Sailor Moon H(ope)" and it's awesome. I tell ya what this girl
can write. She has 2 series out, "Sailor Moon H(ope)" and, "4 Weddings
And A Funeral". I love them both; she too is a very gifted writer. Her
favorite scout is Sailor Moon, so Serena fans this would definitely interest
you. Of course, it's interesting no matter what, so why don't you try it?
Susie/Sailor Phoenix: This girl has got a major poetic license!
She's the author of "Letters From A Marriage: Venus" and soon to come out
with "Letters For A Marriage: Kunzite". She has also written "The Other
Serenity". Her stories are very well written, a word of warning though.
If you're not the greatest with understanding near poetry, then reading
this series might leave you up a creek without a paddle.
Rating: G or a definite Y, again even 2 year-olds could read
this and be okay.
Disclaimer: Alrighty everyone here it is… I DO NOT UNDER ANY
CIRCUMSTANCES OWN SAILOR MOON!!!!!!!!!! I SO TOTALLY WISH I DID BUT I DON'T
SO DON'T GO GRABBING ANY STUPID, BLOOD-SUCKING LAWYERS AND JAMMING THEM
INTO MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Phew.
Sailor Dorks Part 2
By: Merc
Characters:
Serena Warren………………….Sailor Moon
Amy Anderson………………….Sailor Mercury
Raye Hino……………………….Sailor Mars
Lita Kino………………………...Sailor Jupiter
Mina Aino……………………….Sailor Venus
Reeny Warren…………………..Sailor Chibi(mini)-Moon
Darien……………………………Endymion (or a.k.a. Tuxedo Mask who does not appear
in this story)
Haruka ………………………….Sailor Uranus
Michiru………………………….Sailor Neptune
Hotaru Tomoe…………………..Sailor Saturn
Setsuna…………………………..Sailor Pluto
Narrator: Hello and welcome once again to yet another horribly
written episode of Sailor Dorks. This time, our scouts are on vacation.
It's winter break (next to no one's Christian in Japan, but then again
who really cares?) and everyone's having a blast. Serena as usual is over
at Raye's temple reading comics and annoying Raye beyond belief, and Amy
as usual is studying at the park (her favorite place aside of school).
Lita is (once again) at the arcade swooning over Andrew, Mina is right
next to her doing the same thing, and Hotaru is plugging in another lamp
when suddenly a fuse blows and the whole house turns into an indoor nightscape.
Setsuna is hanging around, reading a little bit, Darien is somewhere, Reeny
this time is diving her math tutor crazy, and Michiru and Haruka are at
some restaurant swooning over each other (as usual). Luna and Artemis are
hanging out at the city dump. That's it, now on with the story!
At Raye's temple…
Serena: * giggle *, tehee, Tehee, TEhee, TEHee, TEHEe, TEHEE!
Raye: Shut up!
Serena: HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
Raye: SHUT UP!!!
Serena: (between giggles) Oh Raye, take it easy! This comic
is so funny! Have you read this yet?
Raye: No because you're too busy hogging it!
Serena: Waaaaaa!!! Raye, your so meeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnn!
Raye: (silently praying) Great spirits shoot me now I beg of
you…
Meanwhile…
Professor Tomoe: AAAAAAAAAA!!! ALL MY WORK, WHERE DID IT GO?
Who, what? Why did the power go out? OH NO, ALL MY WORK (he looks at the
blank computer screen where only moments before he had finished a report
that took him 2 all-nighters to type up)!!!
Hotaru: Oops.
Meanwhile…
Tutor: Now then Reeny, what do you get when you take 10 times
9?
Reeny: A big number.
Tutor: Okay, Reeny, try to work it out. Now, what's 10 times
9?
Reeny: You can't make me!
Tutor: (growing impatient) Come on now Reeny, you can do this.
Reeny: Go pound sand!
Tutor: That's wasn't a very nice thing to say.
Reeny: I think it was appropriate!
Tutor: Why you little, I oughta…
Reeny: Tehee hee.
Meanwhile…
Lita: (drool is running down the side of her mouth) What a hunk!
Mina: (dumbly) Huh?
Lita: Dang, he can have my number any day.
Mina: Not unless he's dating me!
Lita: Huh?
Mina: He he.
Lita: Oh no you don't!
Mina: Oh yes I do!
Lita: (growling) Wrong answer blonde!
Mina: (stammering) L-L-Lita, what are you doing? He he, I was
only joking!
SLAM!!!
Meanwhile…
Michiru: (dreamily) Haruka…
Haruka: (dreamily) Michiru…
Michiru: (dreamily) Haruka…
Haruka: (dreamily) Michi… HEY HOW'S ABOUT SOME SERVICE?
Michiru: Huruka!
Haruka: What?
Meanwhile…
Luna: Artemis, I've got a question.
Artemis: What?
Luna: Well, you see, I've been, uh, wondering, why have you
been walking and sitting so weird?
Artemis: Well, um, you see, after you nearly killed me and then
that Negamonster slammed me and all, Mina took me back to the vet. Well,
the doctor had to take my temperature and all and well, you've been through
it. Ya know, where they stick that cold, dry, thermometer up your * ahem
*.
Luna: And?
Artemis: It went south.
Luna: South?
Artemis: Yea, south.
Luna: Ouch.
Artemis: Tell me about it, the doctor said that there were two
ways that he could get it out: a quick painless surgery or the hand. Mina
opted without hesitation for the hand. Ever since then, I've been very,
um, uncomfortable.
Luna: Oh.
Artemis: Yea, oh.
Meanwhile…
Setsuna: (reading) Do de do de do…
Some Guy: Hey there, hot stuff.
Setsuna: (upper cuts him hard and then gives him a swift knee to the
you-know-where) don't call me hot stuff!
Some Guy: (moaning) @#$%^&*(@)!
Meanwhile…
Darien: (entering the arcade) Hey Andrew!
Andrew: Hey Darien!
Darien: What's up?
Andrew: Nothing much, there was an incident though about an
hour ago. Lita slammed Mina over the head pretty hard with a stool. Had
to call an ambulance, but she'll be fine as soon as she can remember her
name.
Darien: Oh.
Andrew: Want something to drink?
Darien: Nah, game?
Andrew: What the hey, lunch break is in 5 minutes anyway. Boss
won't mind.
Darien: Lucky dog.
Andrew: What?
Darien: I said lucky dog. My boss is a total jerk, won't let
me out early for anything. The guy really should go see a psychiatrist.
Andrew: I know the feeling.
Meanwhile…
Amy: (reading) Do de do de do…
* Suddenly, someone walks up and stops in front of her. Noticing
the sudden loss of sunlight, Amy looks up. *
Amy: Greg!
Greg: (shyly) Hey there, long time no see.
* Amy stands up, not noticing that she dropped her book *
Amy: (shyly) Hi.
Greg: (bending down to get her book) Hi.
* Greg hands Amy the book that she dropped *
Amy: (blushing) Thanks.
Greg: (Blushing) No problem.
Amy: What are you doing here?
Greg: I wanted to surprise you. I just moved back, hopefully
for good this time.
Amy: Oh.
Meanwhile…
*Serena is walking through the park after being kicked out of
the temple by Mars, the goddess of war, otherwise known as Raye the angry.
She sees the little romantic get together and hides behind a tree. She
listens to their conversation, trying as best as she can to stifle her
laughter, until Greg kissed a startled Amy on the lips. *
Serena: (whispering to herself) Oh man, Raye's gotta here about
this! Greg kissing Amy, man this is sweet!
* Serena sprints back to the temple where a frustrated Raye stands
trying to kill a giant indestructible beetle. *
Raye: @#$% you stupid beetle, die!
Serena: RAYE, RAYE YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS!!!
Raye: I thought I told you to get lost, ya meatball head!
Serena: Waaaaaaaaa! Raye, you're so mean!
Raye: Oh no, not again!
Serena: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Raye: Would you calm down already!
Serena: (sniffling) Noooooooo!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Raye: Why me?
Chapter 2