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Of Mind Games and Lucky Breaks:
Being The 22nd Part
Scene: The kitchen, right where we left off. Greg Hatcher: That's odd. Sir Tim isn't answering his phone. Golden Lion: I hope nothing's wrong. Slick: *zzzzzzz* As Golden Lion and Greg Hatcher try to contact the scattered members of their team, Slick has a dream sequence/flashback . . . Slick put the few pages from the file in the fax tray and quickly punched in a phone number. When it had gone through, he gathered the papers up and walked back over to the cabinet. Unfortunately, in his urgency, Slick didn't see a shady figure slip into the room behind him and whack him in the back of the head. **WHACK!** "Ow!" Slick yelled. "What the Hell are you doing?" "Uh, I was trying to knock you out," replied the shady figure. "Well you don't aim for the side of the head unless you're aiming for the temple, you nitwit!" Slick pointed to a spot in the back of his head. "You're supposed to aim for back here!" "You mean like... THIS?" **WHACK!** Slick woke up. He couldn't see anything. And he couldn't move. Needless to say, this didn't put him in the best frame of mind. "Hey!" Slick bellowed "What the hoo-ha is going on here?" Someone chuckled. Slick heard footsteps walking towards him. "It's that spot in the back, right?" **WHACK!** Luckily, the blow to the head didn't knock Slick out this time. "Amateurs," he thought derisively. "But I think I'll play dead for a little while. Maybe I'll learn something." "Why are we using him?" said the voice of his original attacker. "Why don't we just do it ourselves?" "Oook! Oook!" said another voice. "Oh, I guess." said the first voice. "So should we get started? I have the tape with the subliminal message. Just so you know, the trigger word is 'Nifty'." "Oook!" "All right then. Do you have the headphones?" "Oook! Oook-oook!" "Cool. Let's do it then." Slick could feel the headphones going over his ears. He steeled himself for the worst. **CLICK** "Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I think I did it again Kill Greg Hatcher "It might seem like a crush Oops!...I did it again Kill Greg Hatcher "You see my problem is this Kill Greg Hatcher "Oops!...I did it again Kill Greg Hatcher "Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO," Slick howled. "Play it again." **CLICK** Much later . . . "I think that's enough." "Oook." "Oh, okay. A few more times." Later still . . . "Okay, that's enough. Refresh my memory, what do we do with him now?" "Oook. Oook-oook. Oook, oook oook ook." "All right then. Back to the kitchen it is. Does he have his Moderator Gun on him?" "Oook." "Good. Now to 'sedate' him." **WHACK** Slick wakes up. He yawns. Slick: Hey guys, what's up? Golden Lion: We're having trouble getting through to the rest of the team. Sir Tim still won't answer his phone and Wolvie's Girlfriend thinks I killed Jack Tango. Greg Hatcher: We got through to Bouncing Boy, though. He'll be here in a few hours. Slick: Well that's good news! Golden Lion: By the way, Slick . . . do you remember who hit you? Slick: No clue, GL. One minute I'm standing right over there; the next, you guys are waking me up. Greg Hatcher: Too bad. I wish we had some clue to the identity of the real culprit, here. Slick: Oh, don't worry. I'm sure it'll all work out. ---- Scene: Yet another dingy, poorly lit room. There seem to be a lot of those in this story. Anyway, in this dim locale, Sir Tim, Fenris, Expletive Deleted, and Papergirl are sitting on the floor. They had all been tied up, but Fenris (the first to awaken) had been able to chew through the ropes. Too bad the door was locked from the outside. Sir Tim Drake: Darn it! How do we get out of here? Papergirl: *sniffling* I don't know. Expletive Deleted: There's no way out! We're doomed! Doomed, I tell you! Papergirl smacks Expletive Deleted upside the head. Expletive Deleted: Thanks, PG. I needed that. Papergirl: *still sniffling a little* Don't mention it. Fenris: Ri'm rungry! Papergirl: Huh? What was that, Fenris? Fenris: I said I was hungry. I think it's been almost two hours since I've eaten! You wouldn't happen to have any cake handy, would you? Papergirl: 'Fraid not. Sorry. Expletive Deleted: Crap. I was kinda hungry, too. Fenris growls a bit, then sits his head down on his paws and goes to sleep. Suddenly, his eyes snap open. Fenris: Someone's coming! Sir Tim Drake: Who is it? Fenris: I think it's Wolvie's Girlfriend! Expletive Deleted: *yelling* R.J.! We're in here! Let us out! The door opens and Wolvie's Girlfriend sticks her head through. Wolvie's Girlfriend: What are you all doing in Jack's Cult's storage room? Sir Tim Drake: We were kidnapped! What are you doing here? Wolvie's Girlfriend: I was collecting money to buy Jack a fruit basket. Kidnapped? Jinkeys! Papergirl: Jinkeys? What does that mean? Sir Tim Drake: Nevermind that. Let's just get out of here. Based on what Papergirl told us, we have to head towards the Vertigo Board right away! Wolvie's Girlfriend: The Vertigo Board? Why there? Papergirl: I think Howyadoin was the one who poisoned Jack Tango! Wolvie's Girlfriend: That bastard! And I trusted him! Papergirl: Creepy, isn't it? We all trusted him! Wolvie's Girlfriend: We can take my new van! Fenris: Rou, uh, I mean you have a new van? Wolvie's Girlfriend: Yessir! It's a big 'ol full size. Blue with green trim. Only problem is, the spedometer is broken and I can't tell how fast I'm going. I'm thinking of naming it the "Mystifying Machine." Sir Tim Drake: We're wasting time! To the "Mystifying Machine!" The gang runs from the room and out to the parking lot. Expletive Deleted: Any chance we could stop for a burger or five on the way? I'm still starved. Fenris: Rat rakes rwo of us!
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