1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj. Possing the ability to turn the

bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.

2. CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of

running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching

over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the

vacuum one more chance.

3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the piece of candy you

dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow remove all

the germs.

4. ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one

armrest in a movie theater.

5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto

the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally

decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling the "open

here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the

"illegal" side.

7. PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole

purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.

8. PHONESIA (do nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and

forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

9. PUPKUS (pup'kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog

presses its nose to it.

10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting

the phone ring at lease twice before pick it up, ewven when you are only six

inches away.