A little boy and his father were walking outside when the father took out a can of chewing tobacco and took a chew.

The little boy said "Daddy, can I have some too?"

The dad looked down at his son and said "Is your pecker long enough to reach your asshole, son?"

The little boy replied "No, daddy, it's not."

The father said "Well then I guess you can't have any."

Later, that night after dinner, the old man lit up a cigar. The little boy said "Daddy, can I have one too?"

The dad looked down at his son and said "Is your pecker long enough to reach your asshole, son?"

The little boy replied "No, daddy, it's not."

The father said "Well then I guess you can't have one."

The boy went into the kitchen and got himself some cookies that Grandma had made for him. His father walked in and saw him eating the cookies and said "Wow son, those cookies sure look good."

The boy said "Yep, they sure are!"

Then the dad said, "Do you think your old man could have one of them cookies?"

The boy looked up at his dad and said "Is your pecker long enough to reach your asshole, Daddy?"

The dad laughed and said "Yes, son. Yes it is."

"Good," said the boy "Go fuck yourself - Grandma made these cookies for me!"