  OFFICE CHRISTMAS PARTY

 John,  woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a
 pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable to recall the
 events of the preceding evening.  After a trip to the bathroom, he 
 made his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him.
  
 "Louise," he moaned, "tell me what happened last night.  Was it as
 bad as I think?"
  
 "Even worse," she said, her voice oozing scorn.  "You made a
 complete ass of yourself.  You succeeded in antagonizing the entire
 board of directors and you insulted the president of the company, 
 right to his face."
  
 "He's an asshole," John said.  "Piss on him."
  
 "You did," came the reply.  "And he fired you."
  
 "Well, screw him!" said John.
  
 "I did.  You're back at work on Monday."
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