Is it Thursday Already?...July 8, 1999

Is it Thursday Already?...July 8, 1999

I care for a client over night almost every Thursday. In a career that has spanned almost a decade, I have tried not to "bring clients home" in an effort to maintain boundaries between my personal and professional lives. There was a nine month period a few years ago during my marriage when we fostered a youth, but aside from this, I have done fairly well not bringing work home with me (in a physical sense anyway).

I decided to accept this client for a couple reasons, least of which was the money. He came through an organization just starting to contract my services, and truth be known, without The Goddess here, it gets lonely sometimes. I figured that one night a week would not impinge on my ethics too badly. I have come to dread Thursdays.

I am not in the habit of making anti-client statements. I try to see the good in all people, even when it is buried miles deep below a mountain of pain. Nevertheless, this young man pushes my buttons. He not only pushes my buttons, but actively sought them out when we were first getting to know each other, and now pushes them on purpose. Combine one stressed out crisis worker with one ADHD (attention defecit hyperactivity disorder) child who lacks a conscience and social skills, and you have a mix not even the strongest of medications (for me that is) can bind. At almost twelve, he cannot find something to amuse himself with for even five minutes, and when I suggest something, it is never okay. When I plan an activity, he does not want to do it, but will ask to the week following as if I had been denying him the activity all along. He is selfish, self centered, and cannot ever see how his behaviour impacts on others. He is cruel. One cannot turn his back on this youngster when angry lest he be assaulted. When a person is not around for him to vent his frustrations on, he takes it out on Reekie, Moo, Will and Gull. This is perhaps what aggravates me the most above all else. My pets are kind, gentle, and loving animals who in my care have never been lashed out at or physically endangered. I can tolerate a great deal of transferred issues, but this I cannot.

I ask myself occasionally why I continue providing relief for this youth. The answer is clear most times. He needs someone to care for him, to show interest in his well being, and teach him what he needs to know to survive this hell called life. If it were not me, chances are it would be someone who was interested only in making money from this child, and someone who would not handle the abuse this child dishes out without dishing out some as well. I am not trying to be a martyr; I recognize the realities of our child care system. It is the same all over this continent.

So, here it is Thursday night. I am exhausted mentally, emotionally, and physically. I made it through another Thursday relatively unscathed, nonetheless. He made it through another day experiencing at least one person caring about him. A prayer to the spirits for both of us is in order...

...Blessed Be