Tent City
                        by Thomas Van Gemert

	
Situation

	After a devastating earthquake rocks Los Angeles, the government 
funds a city of tents for those who have become temporarily homeless.  
After the quake victims have returned to their rebuilt or new homes, the 
government decides to keep the tents up as homeless shelters.  It is now 
six months after the quake and the Stoops family is still living in 
their tent due to Mrs. Stoops clinical paranoia about living under a 
hard roof.  Even though the father is employed and the family can easily 
afford to move back into society, the government allows them to remain 
living in the tent due to the mother’s condition.  

Characters

Lonnie Stoops, the father, semi-dopey and happy-go-lucky, works in the 
Los Angeles sewers which is an acceptable setting as far as safety goes 
to Mrs. Stoops.  Mr. Stoops doesn’t mind living in a tent for free with 
only electricity and phone bills to pay.  His only complaint that he 
gripes about often is the lack of a sewer system and having to share a 
porta-john with the homeless neighbors.  He has fecalphile tendencies 
which surface every now and then which he makes no attempts to stifle 
because he is not aware of them as being odd and disturbing.    He 
considers his defecation time sacred and misses his old throne.  Often 
he will break out his picture album with photos of his old toilet, some 
with him sitting on it and others depicting his “works of art” which 
really drives Cecil up the wall and is one of the many reasons why he 
doesn’t like to have friends over.  Another is Lonnie’s built up 
tolerance to fecal stench which has him leaking out deadly SBVs in the 
tent and not being aware of it, even when the rest of the family 
frantically evacuates.

Drucie Stoops, the mother, is the sole reason why the family continues 
to live in a tent on the outskirts of the city.  She has been diagnosed 
with a phobia of structures (research needed) and her condition and the 
recommendation of Dr. Tyrone McGriff allows her and her family to live 
in the tent until she recovers.  Since the earth quake, with the help 
of McGriff’s suggestion and Lonnie’s handy man skills, electricity and 
television have been hooked up to the tent and additions have been added.  
Flowers and bushes outside add to the silliness.  There are even fancy 
tapestry dividers hung up to separate rooms.  Drucie is often found in 
curlers and a bathrobe, watching the local news which contributes to 
her acquiring additional paranoias. The more she watches, the more 
reasons she finds to continue tent dwelling. Cecil is continually 
shutting off the television and tossing a book into her lap, which 
she tosses aside and clicks the remote.  So Cecil hides the remote 
etc...many antics to be found here.  Whenever anyone, especially 
Lonnie or Cecil, leaves to go into town, she has them put on a helmet.  
Lonnie wears one for his job so he doesn’t mind but Cecil always 
takes his off the second he is out of the tent and hides it in a tree.  
When he returns, he puts it back on again.  Drucie likes Trenton for 
his pro-tent lifestyle and believes that his reasons are the same as 
hers.  In actuality Trenton’s reasons are quite different - rebellion, 
not fear, but he doesn’t let Drucie know this because he would like 
for the Stoops to adopt him so he won’t have to worry about paying 
bums to pose as his parents anymore.  So he is always trying to make 
a good impression and, when Cecil isn’t around, dropping hints but 
to no avail for she never comprehends.       

Cecil Stoops, the son and main character, is a college student studying 
English at UCLA and often times seems like the only sane person in the 
show.  Every episode finds him with a new plan to move out and every time 
he fails.  His biggest obstacle is his mother and the tension is evident.  
Often he dreams of her death.  But these dreams are portrayed in a 
humorous light hearted way so as not to be too disturbing.  

Trenton, Cecil’s friend since grade school, lives in tent next door.  His 
parent’s where friends with the Stoops and lived in the tent next door 
for a while after the quake but then   decided to move to New England.  
Trenton stayed to continue creating shows to put on the cable access 
station.  His shows are never accepted as material that is worthwhile 
for the community but he continues doggedly to create shows that don’t 
belong on cable access like professional wrestling (The Castrator) and 
swim suit modeling (Tippy).  He graduated from high school with Cecil 
but didn’t go the college route.  Digging the reclusive tent life, when 
he is not telemarketing from his tent to earn money or working on a new 
cable access show, he is maintaining a homeless man and woman to pose as 
his parents so he can continue to be allowed to live there.  In a sense 
Trenton lives like a homeless person.  His tent is a pig sty, he wears 
old worn out clothes, and he has an attitude against conforming to 
conventional society.  His living in a tent is his main way of rebelling 
against society and is the foundation of his personality.  He is always 
offering Cecil a place to stay in his tent but Cecil refuses because it 
is such a mess and because he’d rather live with his parents than Trenton.  
The way the two have such opposite views on life and yet remain such 
good friends is an essential part of the show.

Tippy, Cecil’s girlfriend, is also a student at UCLA (major?).  Beautiful,
 yet spacey, she is always trying to help Cecil with his attempts to move 
out but is always getting in the way and often accidentally foiling him.  
Her nympho tendencies, severe thrashing in her sleep, and incredible 
snoring prevents Cecil from being able to live in her apartment.  

The Castrator, an aspiring professional wrestler, earns a living putting 
dry ice on people with cancer who have had their bodies deep-freezed 
until the cure is discovered.  These wealthy people “in stasis” are found 
all over his apartment in glass caskets.  Not all of them have done it 
because of cancer.  One old man decided to do it because he was bored and 
wanted to do some space traveling.  
	In his spare time, the Castrator is trying to create a new 
wrestling federation.  Trenton, who shoots the Castrator’s matches 
(in one episode (the pilot?), he tries to get the wrestling on cable 
access) is also friends with him and Cecil and Trenton are often found 
hanging out at the Castrator’s apartment, with their feet resting on one 
of the sleep chambers that also functions as a coffee table.  There is 
no room for Cecil or Trenton to move in (this should be made clear in the 
pilot).  The Castrator can afford to rent the connected apartment next 
door and he has built a wrestling ring in the middle.  All sorts of crazy 
characters that want to wrestle in The Castrator’s federation are always 
found hanging out, coming and going, practicing, etc.  The Castrator is 
called so because of his trade mark tearing out the gonads of a pinned 
opponent.  He uses bloody pig testicles and stomps them, throws them 
into the crowd, forces them down the throat of the unconscious victim, 
etc.  Trenton tells him that this is too graphic for any television 
outlet but he refuses to listen to reason, feeling that his trade mark 
will one day make him a star.  When interested deep freeze customers 
stop by, he hides all signs of amateur wrestling and cleans up his image 
and manner.     

Dr. Tyrone McGriff, Drucie’s psychiatrist, is a blind African American 
who’s recommendations contribute greatly to the Stoops prolonged tent 
life.  Since Drucie can’t visit his office, McGriff visits the tent.  
Drucie looks forward to these sessions and lays down on her couch and 
rambles on and on about what’s ailing her.  She never realizes that 
McGriff is blind no matter how obvious his actions are.  He is attracted 
to her and goes to unnecessary and amusing lengths to keep her from 
discovering his disability.  What does he “see” in her?  Perhaps her 
blindness to reality.  Although research is needed, possibly McGriff 
also believes he’s on the verge of discovering a brand new anxiety 
disorder and his excitement causes him to embellish.  

Another possible character is a Department of Social Services 
Administrator or whoever it is that makes decisions about homeless 
shelters.  Hard-boiled, he is always looking for ways to oust the Stoops 
to make room for the bums littering the fine streets of LA.  Although 
Drucie barely notices him, Trenton is constantly kept on his toes.    

Scene

The setting is Trenton’s messy tent.  A dirty couch sits in the middle 
of the dirt floor, strewn with soiled clothes, pizza boxes, bags, etc.  
Trenton is sitting in his work area which consists of  a small desk up 
against the tent wall, talking on a phone and surrounded with scattered 
papers with lists on them.  The flap of the tent folds up and Cecil 
walks in...

Trenton:  Hi can I speak to Mr. or Mrs. Ker...uh...ringlenbum I mean 
baum?  Hi sir how are you today?  That’s good.  I’m calling to see if 
your interested in ..................insert amusing pitch here......
...........thanks for your time sir. hangs up

Cecil:  Do you always say this is your first day?  You’ve been doing 
this for months.

Trenton grins:  It’s classic strategy.  Makes them sympathetic.

Cecil:  Didn’t work on that guy though huh?

Trenton stands up and stretches:  No I interrupted his dinner.  

Cecil:  Maybe you shouldn’t call around this time.

Trenton:  Everyone’s home from work now.  When should I call?

Cecil:  How about never.  You’re a nuisance to society you know.  
Telemarketing should be made illegal just like junk mail.  It’s a 
waste of.......

Trenton:  Now now.  What the hell’s eating you?

Cecil:  Oh just the parents driving me nuts.

Trenton takes a bottle of wine off a messy shelf:  Well you’ve come 
to the right place.  This stuff will ease your mind. 

Cecil:  What is it?

Trenton holds up the bottle:  Chateau de Morris.

Cecil:   Morris?

Trenton:  Yeah it’s good stuff.  Sets two wine glasses down on a 
decrepit coffee table and pours.  Hey did I tell you I have a new 
dad now. 

Cecil:  A new one already?  What happened to the last one, what was 
his name?

Trenton:  Credence?  He hopped a train.  Said he couldn’t stand living 
with Mable anymore.  He gestures and the camera cuts to a shot of an 
old woman sleeping on her side along the wall, covered in rags and 
filth.  I have to remember to check her pulse sometime.  She’s been 
like that for a long time.  

Cecil:  How long?

Trenton sips wine:  A couple days maybe.

Cecil:  A couple of days!?  Let’s check her pulse now.

Trenton:  No I’ll do it later.  I’m not in the mood.  There’s a chance 
it might wake her up.  They hate it when you wake ‘em up.  Go on, try 
the wine.  Cecil takes a sip.  What do you think, not bad eh?

Cecil:  Not bad at all.  There’s kind of an earthy, gritty tone.

Trenton:  Exactly.  I was looking for those words.  

Cecil:  Speaking of words that’s why I stopped by.  I want my 
Thesaurus back.  You done borrowing it?

Trenton:  Oh yeah.  Sure.  Starts searching amongst the mess on the 
floor.  You know it really helped me spruce up my pitch.  
(note: put a few fancy words in above pitch).

Cecil:  I noticed that.

Trenton tosses aside a heap of clothes, revealing a square of plywood 
with a handle.  The book is there too.  He picks it up.

Trenton:  Here it is. Thanks bud.  Tosses it while he is looking up 
and then clamps his hand over his mouth as the book hits a preoccupied 
Cecil in the gut while he is tipping his glass to finish the wine.  
He coughs violently.

Trenton:  Sorry man are you alright?

Cecil recovers:  Yeah, yeah.  Hey what’s that?  Points to the plywood.

Trenton:  A trap door to our new basement.  The new dad likes to dig.  
Said he was a digger when he was in the State Pen.  Got so good at it 
that he dug his way out.  

Cecil:  You’re living with an escaped convict?

Trenton:  No I don’t believe it.  Morris is always drinking his wine 
and telling stories.  Yesterday he told me he used to be a pearl diver.  

Cecil:  Drinking his wine?  Looks suspiciously at his empty glass 
and then covers his mouth.  Uncovering his mouth, says a bit 
frantically Chateau de Morris?

Trenton:  Yup you bet.  He’s the coolest dad I’ve had so far.  
You want to meet him?  Grabs the trapdoor handle. 

Cecil:  Wait a second.  He’s down there?

Trenton:  Yeah.  It’s where he makes his wine.  Says it has to be 
cool and damp.  

Trenton lifts the trapdoor and tinny bluegrass music and squishing 
emits.

Trenton:  Hey dad!

No response.  The squishing is in time to the bluegrass up-beat 
strumming. 

Trenton:  Hey dad!!

Cecil:  It’s okay.  You don’t have to bother him.

Trenton:  No I want you to meet him.  Hey dad!!!

The music and squishing stop.

Morris:  Is that you son?

Trenton:  Hey dad come up and meet Cecil.  Looks at Cecil.  
He’s funny.  You’ve gotta hear his government conspiracy theory on 
why grapes take so long to ferment.  Note:  Trenton is being sincere.

Cecil gives an uneasy chuckle.
 
Morris’s head pops out of the hole but camera cuts quickly to Trenton.

Trenton:  Cecil Morris.

camera cuts to close up of Morris’ sooty face rising up into the 
shot.  Then cut to Cecil seated on the couch with the empty wine 
glass in his hand, looking up and smiling.  Trenton’s voice:  
Morris Cecil.

Cecil nervously:  Hi.  We were, uh, enjoying your wine.  It’s 
really good.

Cut to shot of Morris’ face again as he smiles, revealing missing 
teeth, and replies  “why thank you” and slowly pan down.  He is 
in grape stained, soiled clothes and his skin is also dirty.  
The pan stops to rest on his filthy feet, splattered with grape.  

Cut to shot of Cecil dropping the glass and screaming over 
roaring canned laughter.  He bolts up and jabs a finger in his 
mouth to gag as he dashes out of the tent.

End of scene  


                     
  

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