This page is divided into sections. More to come!

1, 2, 3, Ways To Laugh... - This section tells you how many ways how to do this and that. Funny Jokes.

Phuny Dialouges - The funny conversations from the DKC show

Klump's Fitness A-go-go! - Funny Aerobics to trim off that fat! Aerobics were taken from DKC show! Err.. Klump is trying really hard!

Joke-O-Rama - Simple but still funny jokes. Consits of Knock Knocks and Q and A's.

Unanswered Kwestions - Hilarious questions from DKC show that no one can answer at all.

21 WAYS TO GET K.ROOL MAD

1. Insult him.
2. Insult his mom.
3. Be stupid and sensless.
4. Say K.Rool should not be ruler of Congo Bongo.
5. Saying Donkey Kong is the best.
6. Saying one of K.Rools plans to steal the Coconut is lame.
7. Saying that his dance steps a horrible and unhip.
8. Fail missions if your're Klump.
9. Make K.Rool make a stupid wish on the Coconut.
10. Do jumping jacks really fast and make whistling sounds at the same time.
11. Punching or bumping into K.Rool.
12. Stealing K.Rool's crown.
13. Not listening to K.Rool or not doing what he says.
14. Not doing anything when K.Rool tells you to do something.
15. Turning K.Rool into a baby.
16. Talking back.
17. Stinging K.Rool's butt with bees.
18. Trapping K.Rool.
19. Shooting K.Rool with a Klap Blaster.
20. Stepping on K.Rool's foot.
21. Bumping K.Rool off a cliff.

K.Rool: Once again, I have done the impossible. Teach Krusha to dance! What do you think, Klump?
Klump: Doododododododododododdooooo!
K.Rool: I wish you wouldn't do that!

And later in the story... Where Krool wins and wants to get a wish from the coconut. Instead he wished that Klump would stop doing those silly jumping jacks.

K.Rool: Let's see, what do I want to be for ruler of Congo Bongo?
Cranky: It's not your fault Donkey Kong.
Klump did some jumping jacks for celebration...
Klump: Dododododododoododdooddoodoooo!
K.Rool: I WISH YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT!
Cranky: Hahahaha! Looks like you got your wish, K.Rool!

Dialouge: From Episode "Kong For The Day"
In this episode, Dixie and Donkey were sitting in the woods when suddenly Klumps immitates Donkey's voice and insults Dixie...
Krusha: What about you, Litte Dixie Doodle! You are mine!
Dixie: Huh? What is up with you DK?
DK: What? I didn't say anything!
Krusha: C'mon! Put a lip lock on me Dixie! That chump chimp Diddy will never know!
Dixie: Why you doble crossin' two timin'... wait 'till Diddy hears about this!!!

Diolouge: From Episode "Get a Life! Don't Save One!"
In this episode, Bluster was captured by Krool and he gets a last request...

K.Rool: If you don't tell me what you apes are up too... you'll have to work in my factory!
(K.Rool lowers platform for Bluster to see how horrible the working conditions are)
Bluster: Looks like hard labour. Extremly hard labour!
K.Rool: Oh don't worry! You'll get that coffee break every thousand years or so!
Bluster: Do I get any last requests?
K.Rool: OK. But it can't be too expensive!
Bluster: Nonono! I simply wish to sing a song!
(Starts singing 100 Banana Bunches on the Wall along with some Kritters and Krusha)

Diolouge from: Speed
This part is near the end where genius Krusha returns back to his old self again.

Krusha: I've divised a new plan to let me do the following. One, take over the world, two get rid of those babbling baboons, three get the Coconut.
Klump: And rescue K.Rool from being blown to tiny bits?
Krusha: Hhhhhhhh, and rescue K.Rool from being blown to tiny bits!
(Krusha get hit by a cart)
Klump: Wake up Krusha!
Krusha: Duhhhh... is it Tuesday today?
Klump: You lunkhead!

Diolouge from: Klump's Lumps

K.Rool: Turn left Krusha! I'm going to give you a brainstorming session.
Krusha: I am?
K.Rool: Right.
Krusha: Right.
K.Rool: No you lunkhead! I mean...
(Mine cart crashed)

Diolouge from: Bluster Sale Ape-Stravaganza

K.Rool: Now I will demonstrate, the fall of your island!
Klump: Notice it's fine contours...
K.Rool: Get into the barrel you idiot! Ready, aim, fire!
(Klump gets fired from the bungy barrel)
Dixie: Uh-oh.
(Dixie slams doors and deflects Klump)
Klump: Ahhhhhhhh!
(K.Rool gets hit by Klump and sends them flying back to his cave talking King K.Rool with it).

Dialouge from: Double Date Trouble

K.rool: "Tell them the plan Klump!"
Klump: "A4 will go to the left, and A5 will"
K.rool: "Keep it simple, Klump!"
Klump: "Were going to Cranky's house to steal the crystal coconut! Any questions!?"
(All kritters stand straight with big eyes.)
Sent by Jack Flitton

Dialouge from: Bluster Sale Ape-Stravaganza

K. Rool: I will go on national television!
(pause)
Klump: On the Sing Along with Uncle Swampy show?
K. Rool: No, you lunkhead!
Sent by Diogo

Dialouge from: I Spy With My Little Eye

(In this dialouge, Robo Candy Kong takes the coconut into Krool's vault)
K.Rool: Mwahahha! After I take over Congo Bongo, I will go for a nice, long, stroll!
Robo Candy: Nice, long, stroll. (Robo Candy starts walking)
K.Rool: No! Come back!
(Klump, in a mine cart, bashes K.Rool into the vault and locks him there)
Klump: Where's King K.Rool?

Dialouge from: Kong For The Day

Diddy: Stop you newts! As ruler of Congo Bongo I command you to scram!
Klump: Well, well! Look who's here! IT's the half pint ape! Open fire!
(Kritter fires gun, Diddy get burned)
Diddy: yowyowyow!

Dialouge From: Kong Fu

Diddy: Well, OK! You'll be sorry! I was just trying to give you a break!
Kong Fu: Oh, I'll give Donkey Kong a break. A whole lot of breaks! Not to mention some bumps, lumps and bruises! Because where I come from...
(Lights turn off and Kong Fu starts to whimper)
K.Rool: Klump, stop snnibling!
Klump: Aww... it's not me sir

Dialouge From: Kong Fu

After Krusha fixed the power failure problem...

Krusha: Everything looks bright now!
Krool: Well!!! NOT EVERYTHING!!! (Krusha isn't bright...so there!)

Dialouge From: Buried Treasure
K.Rool is playing a video game on his computer

Krusha: Only 500 more points to beat you record.
K.Rool: Come on, Come on, Come on!!!
(Klump comes in on the computer erasing the game)
Klump: This is General Klump King.K.Rool sir...looking a little pale there sir!
K.Rool:NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
K.Rool smashes the computer and takes deep breaths...
Klump phones on the cell phone
Klump: Seems we had some sort of interference.

Sent by an anonymus person.

Dialouge From: I Spy With My Hairy Eye
Krool gets locked inside a vault and tries to say the password in order to open it...

K.Rool: Uh, Iggly, Biggly, Smiggly, no-Biggly Diggly Piggly... (Klump rides in on a minecart)
Klump: Hold it right there, you mean old yeti! (Looks around)
Klump:Ooops, hah-hah, looks like I took a wrong turn...
K.Rool:YOU TOOK A WRONG TURN THE DAY YOU WERE BORN, YOU USELESS PIECE OF BRAIN MASS!!!
Klump: Retreat!!

Sent by Kaptain K.Rool (James Uhley)

From Episode:Barrel,Barrel,Who's Got the Barrel?
This is at the end when DK and Diddy are in Cranky's Hut

DK:Maybe you should put it in a safer place.
Cranky:Dont worry,as long as I have this stick,no one will bother me.
(Then Eddie the mean old yedi barges in)
Eddie the mean old yedi:Me Ediie the mean old yedi.
Diddy:Except someone with a bigger stick!
(Eddie starts breaking everything.)
Sent by DPer728611

Title: Psyke Out Gator
Danced By: Klump
Music Type Used: Hard Rock
Objects Needed: Kazoo
Dance moves:

1. Start jump up and down and start playing the kazoo
2. Start doing jumping jacks.
3. Go psycko!

Title: DK's Funky Disco Dance
By: DK
Music Used: Pop
Dance Steps:

1. Start bending your back at a really sharp angle.
2. Do the same thing except slouch forward.
3. Wiggle your mid-section.
4. Start from step one and keep going

Title: Sore Buns
By: K.Rool
Dance Steps:

1. Twirl around on your foot like a ballerena.
2. Take a couple of light footsteps.
3. Encore!

Q: What wears a pink hat, is edible, and tastes good?
A: Dixie Sticks!

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Don.
Don who?
Don-key Kong!

Q: Can DK's bananas be converted into a drink?
A: Yes. By giving it to a soft drink company calling it "mellow yellow". (A drink you can find at Burger King)

Q: Why are apes so hairy?
A: Because they forgot to shave!
Sent by Jack Flitton

Q. Why does Diddy like Dixie?
A. Because she went to ChickSchool!
Sent by Dustin Russel

Q.Why does Donkey like Candy?
A. Because he likes sweets!
Sent by Dustin Russel

Q. Why does Donkey like bananas?
A. Because it drives him crazy! (bananas)
Sent by Dustin Russel

Q.If Congobongo was a hotel, what would be the only vacant room left to stay in?
A. Between K.Rool,s ears!!!
Sent by Joshua Taylor

(Knock,Knock)
Who's there?
Crank.
Crank Who?
What do you think it's Cranky Kong and why aren't you getting bannana's?
Sent by Dave Bowman

Q. Why do Zingers hum?
A. They don't know words!
Sent by Chip Leyba

1. How many times will Dixie lose her pets?
2. When will Krusha learn how to tell Tuesdays from the other days of the week?
3. How many times Donkey Kong shouted "Bananaaaa! Slammaa?"
4. When will Bluster know that Candy doesn't like him?
5. What the heck is "Banana Burgingyo?" (Candy's food in episode "Barrel, Barrel, Whose Got the Barrel?")
6. Did Klaptraps wear dentures or braces?
7. What's the point of Krool broadcasting his live show of getting the Crystal Coconut when nobody is watching? (from episode "Bluster Sale Ape-Stravaganza)
8. When will Kiddy, Wrinkly, Swanky, and the Brother Bears will shop up in the show?
9. When will Krool fire Klump and Krusha?
10. How come the Kong's huts doesn't have bathrooms?

Hey! That's about it! Even if our jokes didn't tickle your funny bone, well... at least you know that this site has a bit of sense of humour. Do you have jokes? Funny ones? Well, you can send it to Klump and he'll post it right here! Just send clean jokes and jokes that are in one of the categories above! Keep comming back becuase there are tons of more jokes to come and that means tons of laughter!