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	There was an old puzzler, Ben Ross,
	Who died - doing crosswords, of course.
		He was buried, poor Ben,
		With eraser and pen
	In a box, six feet down, three across.

	There was an Old Man of Madras,
	Who rode on a cream-coloured ass;
		But the length of his ears,
		So promoted his fears,
	That it killed that Old Man of Madras.

	There once was a fellow named Ray,
	Who said in utter dismay,
		"I really don't follow....
		How can anyone swallow,
	The same pill three times a day?"

	In my fridge there resides a mold,
	Whose colors are stunningly bold.
		When I found it last night,
		I said with a fright,
	That the thing must be twenty years old.

	A newspaper reader named Gage,
	Would fly into a terrible rage.
		When he would choose,
		To read some big news,
	And find it continued ...
	                         next page!

	Three scribblers whose names end in Bert,
	Gil, Her and Flau - are now inert.
		Gil wrote silly songs,
		Her satirized wrongs,
	And Flau was once set for School Cert.

	A pirate who had a tin ear,
	Was arrested on Buccaneer Pier.
		His crime, you should know,
		Was his singing: "Yo Ho!
	Ho, and a bottle of beer."

	There once was a fellow from Greece,
	Who forgot Pi's last decimal piece,
		So he used electronics
		To collect Pi mnemonics ...
	Now he's hooked, and there is no release.

	We were painting the church steeple gray,
	When the wind blew our brushes away.
		We said to the pastor,
		"We've had a disaster!"
	He calmly replied, "Let us spray."

	Fear not though, I will not desert you,
	For patience is always a virtue.
		Take new word you've found,
		Speak with diff'rent sound,
	It sounds as though someone has hurt you.