The Planet of the Meatballs
A SC fanfic by KayLynn
Part 1
…Spiraling out of control, the Christa nose-dives toward the planet…
Harlan: Hang on! We're going down!
Catalina: This can't be happening…
Radu: It is, though.
…As the ship breaks through the ionosphere, it approaches a strange, red planet covered with white clouds…
THELMA: 10 seconds to impact…9…8…7…
Comdr. Goddard: Hold on, team.
Ms. Davenport: We'll never make it!!!
THELMA: …2…1…0
…**Splooshaughluph** The ship falls into a murky swamp, skidding and sliding, till finally it comes to a halt. The 'Cases pick themselves up from the floor…
Bova: Are we alive? Did we make it?
Rosie: Well, I think we're OK, so maybe we can --
Radu: Wait! Hold on, I hear something…it's a…a leaking sound!
Catalina: What "leaking sound"?
…A slow trickle of red swamp goo coming from a gash in the ship's side suddenly widens, pouring rapidly into the CommPost…
Radu: THAT leaking sound.
Ms. Davenport: We're going to drown!
Comdr. Goddard: OK, everybody - looks like we have to abandon ship.
Catalina: We can't! We don't know what's out there! Suzee says it could be really dangerous, going out like that.
Harlan: I don't care what your imaginary --
Catalina: Invisible!
Harlan: Whatever. We're gonna do what the commander says. Got that, rainbowhead?
Catalina: Yeah, Harlan, like I'M the one who doesn't listen to him…
Comdr. Goddard: Can you people argue later?
…They all open the airlock and climb out onto the ship's hull. Then they look down at the planet…
Catalina: This is so weird.
Rosie: This planet is made out of spaghetti!!
Comdr. Goddard: That's ridiculous. Planets aren't made out of spaghetti.
Radu: It looks like spaghetti, sir.
Harlan: It smells like spaghetti, too.
Bova: It even tastes like spaghetti!
Everyone: Bova!!!!!
…Suddenly, the Christa tilts to one side - it's starting to into sink into the swamp! The 'Cases, unprepared for the jolt, fall off the ship, into the spaghetti…
Rosie: Eeew!
Comdr. Goddard: Everyone okay?
Ms. Davenport: Okay? We're about to drown in spaghetti on an alien planet, and you ask if we're okay?!?!
Radu: I guess he meant no-one's hurt, right?
Comdr. Goddard: Right.
…Unbeknownst to them, however, not everything on the planet is spaghetti. Slowly slithering towards them is one of the "residents" of the area…
Harlan: Ow! Someone pinched me!
Catalina: It wasn't me.
Radu: Hey, guys…has spaghetti evolved a lot lately, or is that…thing…something else?
…They all turn and look where Radu is pointing. A rather large worm is heading for them. They scream…
Rosie: What is that thing?
Harlan: I dunno, but it doesn't look friendly...
Catalina: Suzee says it's a Zidyonian neck-pinching worm.
Bova: "Neck-pinching"?
Harlan: We've gotta get out of this place!
Radu: There's nowhere to go! The Christa is almost totally under the spaghetti!
Ms. Davenport: We're all going to die!!!
…Commander Goddard wishes Ms. Davenport would be quiet so he could think. What are they going to do? Then he spots something in the distance…
Comdr. Goddard: THELMA! Can you get a reading on that thing over there? It looks like some sort of island.
THELMA: Sir, I have scanned the object, and it appears to be a large…meatball.
Comdr. Goddard: Great… Oh well, any port in a storm, they say. Team! Head for the meatball!
…They all swim frantically towards the meatball, trying to avoid the worms. After several minutes, they arrive at the meatball and climb up onto the shore…
Catalina: This is getting weirder by the minute.
Radu: I agree.
Ms. Davenport: We have got to get out of here, and soon!
Bova: But how? The Christa is stuck in the spaghetti!
Harlan: Maybe we should explore the island -- I mean the meatball. Maybe we could find something that would help us get the ship out.
Rosie: Hey, look, guys! It's snowing!
…White flakes were drifting down from the sky. Falling gently, they landed on the spaghetti sea, the meatball, and the 'Cases…
Bova: Actually, Rosie, it's parmesaning.
Harlan: "Parmesaning"?
Bova: You got a better word?
Harlan: *shrugs*
End Part 1
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Everything on this webpage is copyright © 1998 KayLynn. All rights reserved. No part of this story may be copied, transferred, reproduced, or re-distributed in any way without the express permission of the author. A NOTE TO ANY LAWYERS READING THIS: Please notice that nowhere in this story have I used any titles, names, or images that are trademarked or copyrighted by anyone other than myself. I have specifically avoided infringing on anyone's legal rights. Thank you.
Many thanks to Rossie for converting this picture!