You can do it. And when you do, this will be your gain. You will realize the truth about these seven gifts. You will discover the ecstasy of the divine. You will explore the deepest level of communication. You will debunk ten myths that stunt personal growth. You will learn Solomon's Secrets for Guaranteed Great Sex. This is categorically radical. And empowering. The road not traveled and must of necessity be trod.

Now is the right time for your change! Ensure for yourself that which was once marked only for the privileged: comfort, convenience, happiness, well-being. Astound yourself with the Seven Secrets of Solomon! You might well have one of the clues to the seven secrets of Solomon. Find your clue. Come, find the others who have clues and discover the secrets that will change everything for you forever.

Michael belches and reads the brochure again, taking special note of the backside.

The backside was decorated with an RSVP and its registration number, 12HMHGST1, a questionnaire, an unusual question, and an application form, the meeting place, and other stuff that may be related to the clue.

Michael studies the questionnaire.

As he scratches strips of Mac's burger from between his incisors and works his way back from his futon to the foyer, he thinks: "God must be answering prayers today." And it seems by the sign of the weather that Michael was right. The azure sky puffs only a few white clouds. And soon the night will shower silver stars.

Michael wants to be right in his life, so right, he had remained acutely silent about his deepest concern: why does sex and speaking in tongues cause so much confusion in his church?

He ponders these things often, which was not all that appalling, for Michael was once just as terribly confused about sheep and goats. He had grown up in the New York soup kitchens and church pantries thinking that all sheep were females and all goats were males, which was not so foreign a concept considering the cultural biases of his language. His confusion only worsened when one day as a lad he observed a goat giving birth and dared not ask what trick nature had played on him.

Sex confuses Michael.

Sex confuses the majority of youths, but Michael bides his time, having figured out a way pretty early to keep himself warm without burning ... burning .... burning!

Despite this and all, Michael grew to be an admirable stable-headed youth. Thanks primarily to the personal coaching of a caring New York pastor who knew that the Good News of the Gospel is good news and that the promise of a Living God is abundant life. Michael grew up spiritual and warm-hearted. But the Spirit did not remove his confusion about sex, a confusion that keeps him virgin so far. Not bad, especially since he was the sort who wouldn't care less whether his college mates knows he is a virgin. He has inner strength. He can stand alone. Being right is of higher value to him. And being respected for his values is paramount. And where did he learn much of this from? His new resident hero: the Reverend Basil Jones (Big J to his closest friends). Beryl greatly admires Micheal. He is juicy, young, and smart. But there are problems for Michael. He is not free and available to go on the appointed day to get discover these sacred secrets. There are a whole lot of stumbling blocks in his way.