MY HERO

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My Hero has got to be my dad. I know everyone will probably say the same, well not my dad (laughs), but, you know, their
dad...well maybe my dad, he was pretty damn cool. Only later on did I realize how much he influenced me and was such a vibe in my life.
I didn't really realize how much he had been a part of my life, and influenced me growing up, until later on. And when we finallygot back together, I saw we pretty much liked the same stuff and got along really good after all the B.S. that happened in our family life.
He was quite a strong man and had been through a lot of himself, obviously that generation had the wars, depression and what not that went down. You kind of forget how really strong that generation was, and how those times developed their character and their stronger values. It seems that now, most of the time, we have it pretty easy.
It's good to look back and realize what they went through. You never really do that a lot, you think your parents are there just for when you were born onwards, you know? You don't realize what they went through before that and how you came about.
And I just gained a lot more respect later on. But it's unfortunate when you actually realize it after they are gone, once they've passed on.
While he was sick I realized how strong he was and got a lot closer to him which was great, because a lot of people don't get to do that. Sometimes people just go, people leave us without warning. There was at least a little warning with him, and I got to get a little closer and even closer at the end.
He would pretty much try anything and everything in his life. He wanted to try it all really. Later on he told me about some of his earlier jobs. I knew he used to drag race motorcycles, I've got quite a few pictures and trophies of his from his earlier days. He worked in a candy factory, he was a milkman and he drove trucks for a living later on...
He started out with a few trucks with my godfather/grandpa we used to call him. But there were a few trucks and I've got
pictures of me hanging out in some of them. They used to park them underneath the freeway and that was their office (laughs).
Started out with a couple of trucks and grew to owing his own company, which to me is the American way. Anyone that comes from nothing and makes something out of nothing - you've got to respect that.
I did have a pretty huge problem with the religion growing up, Christian Science, pretty strict rules that I'd had in my youth and growing up, not fully understanding the religion. I just knew that there were rules around it, which was pretty frustrating. That's the kind of religion that you can really get into after you've lived a bit. It's something that...you can't just be a kid and think that doctors are no good and any medicine is not necessary and anything you have is God-given and basically comes down to huge faith and a lot of belief in yourself, that's something you don't really quite get when you're a kid.("The god that failed",His mother refued to take any medicines..Stigma ed. )
Later on in life, after you've gone through all the other stuff, it sounds a lot better. So as a kid id didn't make sense to me, and i battled it quite a bit through my teens and twenties, and it kind of messed with my head.
But later on when my dad was a bit sick, I kind of realized how much it played a part in his life and how pretty magical and
powerful it was in his mind. Through talking with my sister we really both agreed that he was probably the most powerful man we'd ever known. Not as far as money and high position or whatever, but powerful as far as controlling his thoughts and emotions and things around him, how he handled situations and his extremely positive attitude towards life.
I used to get really mad when he had a farm out in Arkansas, and he'd hire kids that came around. Even when he was sick, he'd give them the key to the equipment and they'd cut the hay for him or go cut some trees, he'd go down there (later on) and they'd ripped off his chainsaw or some really expensive equipment, some of his prized possessions and stuff that he had worked for. And I'd get som mad and say, 'Dad why don't you round up the boys and go kick his ass?' Call the cops or do whatever it takes, whether it's proper justice or street justice, just make them pay! And he would just tell me, 'nah it's allright, he'll get in the end somehow.' He wouldn't get himself wound up with little crap like that, and that takes a lot of self control. He was just out to have fun in life and have a good time and not let that crap get to him.
You know, I'm still working at it. I do aspire to that and a few songs came around to that kind of thinking, you know 'Wasting My Hate', that was kind of him and a bit of a mixture of Waylon Jennings too, you know, they were both from the same kind of school. You know, the idea of wasting your hate on somebody and just...moving on. 'Hero Of The Day' was another song that really was inspired by him and both my parents.
You know, children these days are looking for outside heroes and they don't look at their parents as heroes. But all they have to do is listen to, or understand a little more about, their parents I think and vice versa obviously.
There's a few people that I wish were still around, but I don't dwell too much on it. I don't remember anniversaries of deaths
and 'let's go visit the graves and put flowers on' and all that. They are always in my mind and always in certain situations you
think of a person like, 'oh, he'd have loved that!' or 'if he was here he'd have done that.' That's when they come alive in you.
Cliff (Burton) is one, but first and foremost are my parents.
I wish they were both here to see...I know they are...but I wish they were physically here to see shows and hang out
backstage, see my son and daughter and all that kind of stuff. My dad got to do that a little bit, but I get a little jealous when
Jason's parents show up and he gets the big family room and all that stuff. I see the joy that it brings him, with his parents there showing their support.
I do think about them all the time, especially now that I have the children. I wish they had Grandma and Grandpa on my side, but we still have a picture of him. Cali talks about Pops like he's there, which is pretty cool. So, somehow she knows that he's there in spirit."

Source: "So what, volume 7, number 4, 2000".

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