Chapter Nine - Second Chances
It was dark when Serena opened her eyes again. But
then, it had been dark when she started, and dark when she'd
collapsed from power drainage. *I've really got to stop
collapsing.* Serena thought drowsily, *It's becoming a
habit.* Her body ached, and she was cold. She wasn't
wearing the princess dress anymore. *I wonder what it'll be
like to transform into Princess Serenity and out again
without being drained. Maybe I'll try it one day.* Serena
thought. She stirred slightly, trying to roll away from a
stone that was digging into her hip. She felt someone
gather her protectively, and she rolled over into somebody's
chest. *No, not somebody. Darien. I would recognize the
cologne he uses anywhere.* Serena stiffened slightly,
*Darien. What am I to do about him?* she thought sadly, *I
love him, but I can't bare to let somebody get close to me.
Not this soon... Not yet.* she pretended unconsciousness
for a while, trying to sort her thoughts and feelings out.
*I can't let somebody close. Verena.* her sister. For
a short while, she'd known what it was like to never be
without somebody who loved her. For so short a time...
*Not yet. Maybe one day... One day if he really loves me.*
she thought sadly, *I don't want to end up like Verena and
Jadeite. Verena broke apart when Jadeite betrayed us. I
can't stand it. If Darien... If Darien left me, or hurt
me... I - I don't think I'd be able to go on. I can't let
somebody so close to me... I can't even trust him... How
many times has he broken my heart...* and she decided then.
Maybe one day, if Darien loved her, maybe one day in the far
future, or maybe one day in the near future. But not now.
Not this day...
"Darien?" she whispered.
He looked down, he was in his normal, street clothes,
the scorched, burnt black armor of Prince Darien gone -
vanished when he transformed back no doubt. The courtyard
wasn't empty, but it was quiet as the fighters licked their
wounds and comforted each other. There were tear marks on
his face, and he grasped her tightly against him.
"Oh god, Serena. I thought - I thought you would die."
He whispered hoarsely, "I love you Serena. If you had died
- I don't know what I would have done."
She stiffened - *No, I don't want to hear this. Please
don't make this any harder for me.* she thought in despair.
"What is it?" Darien looked down at her, and Serena felt
a twinge of guilt, knowing he'd felt her stiffen, "Serena,
what is it?"
"Darien - I can't... I mean - we can't." She halted,
not knowing how to say this - this would be so much easier
if she didn't love him - if she could trust him. But she
couldn't trust him. Not anymore, "Darien, I can't go with
you - can't *be* with you." She said in a rush.
*NO! She can't mean what I heard her say!* Darien's
mind screamed in anguish. His hands fell to his side
and Serena scrambled away, standing alone in the empty
courtyard.
"But what about Reenie?" Darien whispered, "Your - OUR -
daughter in the future." He stood up, holding out one hand
to her, begging. . .
Serena shook her head, "Maybe one day we'll have her, Darien
- maybe one day in the far future. But not now..."
Darien let his hand drop, Reenie had been the last hope -
his last chance. The fact that she had existed, that she
had been his and Serena's child - *OUR child* - meant that
they would be together again. But now... *Can Reenie have
been born because of necessity? Because Serena knew she HAD
to have Reenie to save us all back here in the past?* he
stared at her, his face a mask, not letting emotions
through. Holding up that control that he'd pride himself in
having for so long now.
"Darien, please understand. I just can't - not now. Not
after Verena. I just want to be alone. I can't go out with
you anymore. Not now - maybe one day - but not now."
Serena whispered. She walked away, not turning back to look
at him again. If he saw the tears falling from her eyes...
It hurt her as much as it hurt him - but she couldn't now.
She couldn't. If he broke her heart one more time... She
couldn't trust him anymore. How could she trust him after
all that he had done to her? And the next time he broke her
heart... would she be able to pick up the pieces?
***
Somewhere in the Asteroid Field
Mistress nodded as she saw what the screens showed her.
*Not as fine as I would have wanted, but still adequate.*
she told herself finally, keeping her anger in check -
barely. She held out her hand, twisting the bond that
connected her and Verena together. The air shimmered above
her hand, and a blue orb fell onto her palm. *She will have
to be punished for what she did.* she decided finally, *She
directly disobeyed me, and such mutiny must be controlled
now, else she later develops a will of her own.* Mistress
decided finally as she carefully floated the orb over to a
white case waiting it's arrival. The empty spot next to it
seemed to echo as the Sapphire landed there. Mistress
gritted her teeth as she controlled the anger in her, *It
does not matter, as yet. There is still many more cards and
the Imperial Crystal shall be mine very soon.* and yet,
precious time was wasted now, waiting for the stars to align
once more and the cards to win her the Crystal, when it
could have been her's now, so easily. *Verena shall pay for
this with blood for the wasted time.* Mistress decided,
allowing the anger to briefly show itself in the darkening
of her eyes, before she controlled it once more and sat down
in the gray chair, waiting.
She was very good at waiting - after all, she had waited
centuries to have the throne within her power.
*Soon, very, VERY soon.*
***
Darien stood on the edge of the cliff. The seagulls
screamed as they flew overhead. Below, the waves crashed
onto the rocks. The day was bright, the sun was shining,
and the wind was brisk and light, sending salty sea-water
into his face. If he turned slightly, he could see a young
family laughing as they played on the beach below. The day
didn't match his mood at all, it should have been pouring
with rain, or at least storm clouds should be gathering.
Grey, windy, cold. But it wasn't, it was bright and
cheerful. The perfect day for going to the beach or walking
down the street with ice cream as you went shopping with
your girlfriend.
Knives shot through Darien's heart. He kicked a rock
over the edge of the cliff, watching it hurtle down towards
the white spray. He wanted somebody - something - else to
feel the hurt he felt. It didn't work - he bent down,
wrapping his hand around a hard edged stone and hurled it
far out into the deep blue of the sea. But the sea didn't
flinch from the stone, it just swallowed it up. It didn't
care about another stone in its waters. Darien clenched his
hands, trying to control the urge in him to *hurt*
something, anything. To make them feel the hurt he was
feeling - had been feeling - would always feel. He picked
up the largest rock he could find, and hurled it out into
the wind.
"Damn you all!" he screamed into the wind, "I don't need
you! I don't need ANYBODY! You hear me?" he shouted,
closing his eyes and holding his hands wide, "I DON'T NEED
ANYBODY!" but he couldn't lie to himself... *I need you..*
He closed his eyes, clenching his fists, trying to get back
that control which he'd had since he was a child and failing
miserably. He glanced up at the sky, and prayed, "God,
please. If I've ever done anything. If I've ever done
anything good in this world. Please. Let me have the
chance to win her back. Let me show her that she can trust
me. She can love me," he whispered. The wind and crashing
waves drowned his words mercilessly. "Please." He pleaded,
"Please, let her give me a second chance."
Without you
The ground thaws
The rain falls
The grass grows
Without you
The seeds root
The flowers bloom
The children play
The stars gleam
The poets dream
The eagles fly
Without you
The Earth turns
The Sun burns
But I die
Without you
Without you
The breeze warms
The clouds moves
Without you
The tides change
The oceans crash
Without you
The moon glows
The river flows
But I die
Without you.
The world revives
Colors renew
But I know blue
Only blue
Lonely blue
Within me, blue
Without you
Without you
The hand gropes
The ear hears
The pulse beats
Without you
The eyes gaze
The legs walk
The lungs breathe
The mind churns
The heart yearns
The tears dry
Without you
Life goes on
But I'm gone
Cause I die
Without you
The End of Second Chances
Thanks to Sonia for your encouragement and endless
enthusiasm, and also, thank you Glenda for your help as
well!
Email me: Flim@hotmail.com
All comments (etc) are definitely welcome. :)
Fiona Lim
Copyright 1997: 'Second Chances' by Fiona Lim and any names she
might be known under. All ideas associated with the plotline
belong to the author.
