ONE MORE TRY
by: The Fox

1. Listening

The wind is savage, strong, violent, and cold, presaging a storm. Many dead leaves fly in the fury of the weather, and crazily turn again and again. In a tree, a dark, black figure looks about without seeing anything. He shows no sign of life, except his deep pools of red — his fathomless irises — which have the sparkle of a living creature. But they are opaque and sad. They contain a fury equal to that of the storm, and so much more.

Hiei.
Hiei, come here now.

The demon closes his eyes in anger. He can intimately feel the voice of the youko calling, ordering him: but he is still incapable of movement. When the storm begins, nothing can level or stop the fury. And when he looks into those green eyes again, he knows he will give in to the storm of his fury for a last time.

Kurama, how can you do this to me?
I truly hate you now.
Bastard.

Hiei.

Never. Never again, youko. You killed Yukina. You killed the one who kept me sane. You killed me when your thorns desecrated her white flesh, snatched her life minute after minute. I can still hear her screams. I can't hear you anymore.
I will kill you.
I swear.

2. Beloved

The storm begins.

The house of Minamino Shuiichi looks vacant. Dark, quiet — too quiet for a normal night. Something insane, dark, and mad hides in the whisper of the trees around the house, in the echo of thunder. A thin figure, darker than shadows themselves, walks slowly to the French window under the brutal rain. A lightning flash lights up his black cloak and the room in front of him.

I'm here.
I'm here for your blood, kitsune.

In the flash of light, the shadows reveal a figure. A young boy — his red hair the color of black roses tonight — rests on the couch, depressed and tired. He sits alone in the living room, silent and immobile.

So quiet all inside...

And the storm raging outside.

Come in, Hiei.
I'm waiting for you.

The demon smashes the window with a savage blow of his sword. While the crystal pieces fall like snow into the room, the red-haired boy doesn't move. He just opens big, liquid, green eyes, and looks into the red and flaming eyes of his executioner, where hate burns in the depths.

"You know why I'm here."

"Yes."

The silence. The emptiness in the space between them.

"I'm here to kill you."

"I know."

The silence again. Hiei looks into the fathomless green eyes with a quick glance, burning and hurt.

"There's nothing you want to tell me, Kurama?"

Don't say my name with rage... please.

"Don't kill me tonight."

"WHAT??"

"Please."

The demon waits. And then, he speaks in a whisper: "Are you begging for your life, kitsune?"

"No. But I don't want my mother to find me in a pool of blood. It would kill her."

The demon waits... And then explodes. "You didn't have mercy on my loved one. WHY SHOULD I HAVE PITY ON YOURS?!"

"Because you're not possessed by Hades now, like I WAS!!!!!" A sudden scream from the quiet figure. Then, he collapses. And cries.

The demon stands over him, sword in hand. And then he goes. The storm and the rain enter through the broken window onto the figure who kneels, crying. No sound can be heard over the fury of the weather.

I'm sorry, Hiei.
Beloved.
Yukina. Yukina. Yukina. Hades possessed me.
I would have preferred to die in your place. I never wanted to hurt you.
To hurt Hiei.
I will die for you, Yukina.
I can't stand the eyes of Hiei.
My Beloved.

3. Leader

Yuusuke waits, sitting in a chair beside Kuwabara's bed. The hospital is very quiet tonight. As it has been these last few weeks.

Kuwabara. My friend. You always were the strength of our group. You were always laughing. And yelling. An indomitable, crazy, mad force of nature.

::Flashback::

"My sword will cut you in two for this, BASTARD!"

"I. DON'T. BELIEVE. IT."

The thorns in his flesh. The cruel plants making him scream, breaking bones and veins. Kuwabara screaming, and then falling. A vision of white running to him, trying to catch him as he fell (amazingly able to support his weight), screaming his name.

Crying over Kuwabara, as his bloody hand touched her face with love.

"I'm OK, Yukina..."

And then the nightmare: The earth exploding in savage fury, as thousands of thorns caught them both. Their screams. The scream of Hiei in his ear. And the laugh of Kurama.

NO!!!!!

The laugh of Hades... it was Hades... Remembering...

"Is he really dead?!"

"I don't know. Maybe he's hiding inside of one of us..."

"Hey, stop the f***ing joking!!!!"

::End Flashback::

In our first fight with Hades, Kuwabara was right. He was hiding. Inside of one of us.
Hades is dead now, truly dead. When Kurama collapsed, incapable of supporting all the power of the Lord of Death, Hiei cleaved his sword through his chest. And I, from behind, used my Rei Gun to destroy the dying God of Evil.
Kuwabara is in a coma. Maybe he will never wake up again. Lucky bastard.
Yukina is dead — truly, cruelly, icily dead. Kurama had done terrible things to her.
Hiei... well... nobody knows.
And I haven't seen Kurama since he was released from the Hospital. He shouldn't be blamed. It's not his fault.
But I don't think I can stand to see the look on his face again.

Yuusuke, alone in the darkness, listens as the rain of dawn slowly creates for him a chorus, and cries...

"Yuusuke."

He must have dozed off for awhile. Koenma is at his side — his lovely, warm, brown eyes tired — shaking his shoulder gently.

"Koenma..." He sits up after a moment, rubbing his eyes.

"Yuusuke, I have bad news for you."

There is a long, deep silence. In a rush, a black figure — tiny and boyish — appears in the suddenly open window.

"Talk." Says a stern, harsh voice.

"You can't find Yukina's soul; is that it?"

"No, it isn't." The soft voice of Koenma makes them both shiver.

I don't wanna know.

"When Hades kills a soul, it is destroyed forever. Burned, lost forever. I'm sorry, Yuusuke... Hiei," he breathes slowly, "but we found Kuwabara's soul. We can return it to his body. You decide, Yuusuke."

"WHY me?!"

"Because you were his leader. He had trust in you."

"And for this I have to return him to a world where he lost his beloved? Why do I have to choose?!!!" screams Yuusuke in rage and despair. "Tell me: WHY ME?!"

"Stop, Yuusuke." The hard voice of Hiei breaks Yuusuke's scream in half. He falls softly into Koenma's arms and cries, trying to control his emotions. But Hiei's cruel voice finds his ears.

"You don't have to choose. Let him live: it is your duty. If he wants to commit suicide later, it is his responsibility."

"How... How can you be so cold, Hiei?" whispers Yuusuke, trying to stop the trembling in his voice.

"Because I earned the right," is the answer.

"What about Kurama?"

Koenma's words drop like a stone in the silence. Yuusuke falls into his chair, his hands cupping his face.

"I... I don't know... Not at this moment, please..."

"Kurama will live. He pleaded to me for his life." Hiei released a "hmph" of contempt. "He wanted to live... for his mother. He said..."

A silence. In this moment, Hiei feels ice seize his heart. He freezes.

Oh, stupid kitsune, Oh MY...

"He is going to..."

Hiei's gaze, suddenly filled with horror, meets the gaze of Yuusuke. For just a second. And then Yuusuke jumps of his chair, no matter his broken leg.

"We have to stop him, Hiei!!"

"Why?" The voice of Koenma is soft, and the two boys look at him in despair. "You wanted his blood for the blood of your sister, yes?"

"Shut up, you stupid..." Hiei's voice is for once filled with remorse and emotion. Yuusuke looks at him.

"And you wanted somebody to lift the weight of the choices from you, yes?"

"Stop, Koenma..."

"Let Kurama choose for himself. You don't have any reason to stop him."

"I have." Yuusuke's voice is strong, conveying his decision. He looks at Hiei, who is in the window, ready to jump into the air. "Go after him. I can't lose another. I won't lose another loved one. That's an order, Hiei!!"

"OK."

Hiei rushes out, and disappears into the cold air. Fear makes his heart thud faster, faster...

Stupid fox. DON'T You DARE!
Stupid Fox.
Stupid Fox.
Stupid Fox.
Don't you dare leave me too.
I love you.

4. Faraway Train: Tenkuu no Jagan

Kurama waits. After his classes had ended, he had walked like a zombie through the afternoon sun. Now the light is fading, and lonely drops of rain fall onto his hair.

He walks until the train station is almost empty. All the students have gone to their houses... and their mothers. When the cold, winter wind blows through the red strands of his hair, he closes his eyes with a tired whisper: "Mother, I'm sorry. I love you so much.
"But there's somebody whom I love much more.
"And he wants me dead."

Night is falling slowly. The last train will leave at 8:45. He walks to the bridge that passes over the tracks, sits, and waits. He is vaguely conscious of the cold wind and the dead leaves flying around him. When one touches his soft cheek, he catches it and smiles slightly.

Dead. As dead as I am inside.
Where did our green innocence go?
Where are you tonight, Hiei?

The 8:40. He slowly puts his hands on the iron railing of the bridge and looks down at the shadows underneath. Five meters. And the rails. Where the train will pass in four minutes.

I'm waiting.

8:41:30'
Yukina, I'm so very sorry.

8:42
Yuusuke, I know you will understand me. You were always my friend.

8:42:30'
Kuwabara... I can never forgive myself for how much I hurt you. More than your body. I killed the one you loved so much.

8:43
Mother, forgive me. I love you. I owe everything to you. I will always love you, no matter what. But I have to do this.

8:43:30'
The train's coming makes the bridge tremble. Kurama puts his left foot over the railing and prepares to jump. At this moment, he closes his eyes and feels the warm tears that will never be released. With the dead leaf in his hand, he falls.

Hiei.

"KURAMA!!!!!!"

He never hits the ground, but the train hitting his side causes an agony of pain. In this fraction of a second, two warm and very alive arms catch hold of his school uniform, and with savage energy send him flying to the left. The roar of the train doesn't allow him to hear anything as he painfully hits the rock-covered ground. He screams in denial. Against the painfully shining, white train lights, he sees a short black figure leaning over him.

"Hiei..." is all he can manage to whisper.

His left side hurts like hell, and makes his green eyes fill with tears. When the train is gone, Hiei gently kneels at his side and takes his red head to place it on his legs.

"Hiei..."

No response. And then something soft and cold touches his face... and another.

Kurama blinks.

Hiei is crying over him.

"Hiei... why? Why did you...?"

Silence. Suddenly Hiei holds him savagely, crying and screaming hysterically. The burning pain of his embrace doesn't matter to Kurama. He just lifts his uninjured arm and holds Hiei also, with all his fading strength. They cry together for a long time.

"How did you dare to...?"

Kurama doesn't have the energy to answer, nor the energy to try to smile. He can only close his eyes, and whisper.

"I'm so very sorry, Hiei..." he whispers with a hoarse voice.

He feels the demon's trembling. Then a pair of translucent, liquid, red eyes look at him closely.

"You scared me to death," says the demon so quietly he almost can't understand the words. Kurama's lips begin to tremble, ready to cry.

"I will never be able to forgive myself... and look again at Kuwabara... at Yuusuke... I'm sorry... ohh, I'm sorry..."

Darkness falls over them both. Suddenly a flash of light — like white neon — appears between them.

"My god..."

The Jagan is burning like a white flame. Hiei slowly, but with determination, lifts his hand and touches the redhead.

"You will be able to. Because I can forgive you... my love."

The completely open Jagan shines, blinding Kurama. Hiei closes his other eyes and concentrates. He knows it will be painful, crazy, maybe even lethal and cruel... but, anything for Kurama. For his life. For his sanity.

For my love.

The power of the Jagan burns all traces of the name "Yukina" from Kurama's mind. It flies and touches anyone who knew... who loved her. Hiei fights with Kuwabara, snatches the memory of the one woman he loves; with Keiko; Yuusuke... All the memories, all the scents and feelings related to the lovely girl with pale blue hair fade. All burned in the fire of the Jagan.

Hiei feels a tear gem on his cheek. Only he will remember her. Only he will carry this pain.

Yukina.
I love you, sister. I'm sorry.
I know you would be able to understand me.

Hiei and Kurama are unconscious when some station guards find them the next morning, under the rain.

Epilogue — A Demon Fairy Tale

Kuwabara only hits Kurama once in the face before laughing over the Hades debacle. After a short period of yelling and throwing things at the poor boy, Kuwabara laughingly forgives him for the Hades possession and his own serious injuries. Like Yuusuke said, anyone can become possessed; it wasn't Kurama's fault. The big, healthy redhead is out of the hospital in two months. The same day he leaves the hospital, the bandage around Kurama's torso is removed from the injury caused by the train impact in his suicide attempt.

"Kurama-kun," says Yuusuke to him, when they are alone. Yuusuke still has his broken leg bandaged. "Listen to me. We have to be happy that there's no fatal injuries to anybody. Thanks to God, Kuwabara will be OK. I understand what you did... but it was stupid. Stupid... and cruel. We love you, Kurama. A whole lot. I'm happy that Hiei arrived in time to save you. I know you feel bad about Kuwabara-kun's injuries, but don't blame yourself. Next time, maybe it will be me who becomes possessed. I was so worried and scared, my friend..."

"I'm sorry..."

The leader hugged his friend warmly — and carefully, around his broken ribs — and then they both go get Kuwabara and carry him to his house. Kurama is still laughing when he arrives at his own home, but something is on his mind.

Hiei.
Where are you?

The little demon had vanished soon after the station guards had found them both under the rain. He had said only: "I will be in the Makai for awhile," and then left.

It is two, long months later.

"Tadaima, Shuu-chan." Shiori, smiling at him, helps him pull off his wet jacket, and kisses him softly. Kurama knows he scared her to death with his suicide attempt. Only his mother knows all of the story, and understands. But she had cried, holding him... Consoling him so warmly, so lovingly. Just like a mother can. Kurama hugs her with all his strength, with all his love for her.

"Go to bed, Shuu-chan, it's late." His mother smiles. The boy kisses her and goes to his room. Slowly, he begins to put his books and school uniform in order for the next day of school. In the window, soft rain is pounding on the glass.

No, not just rain.

Kurama opens the window. A very, very wet — and very cold — fire demon jumps in, wetting the carpet.

"Damn Ningen weather."

"And good night to you too, Hiei. Where were you staying? I was worried about you." Kurama smiles, and gives him a towel to dry his hair. Going to his closet, he gives him a dry pair of pants and a sweater. "Come, put on these clothes."

Hiei doesn't argue, surprisingly. Then he goes over to the dinner of the red-haired boy and eats like he never has eaten before.

"You're hungry."

"Starving."

"What were you doing in the Makai, Hiei?"

"Nothing."

The night is very warm, despite the rain falling outside. When Hiei finishes his spaghetti, Kurama puts a compact disk in his little CD player. He stretches over his bed to read tomorrow's lesson.

I'm tired of the danger
And people of the streets
I'm lookin' for an angel
Trying to find some peace
And I think it's time
That you let me know
So if you love
Say that you love me
But if you don't
Just let me go

"Kurama."

"Yes, Hiei?"

"I'm not mad about Hades, you know."

Kurama looks at him with a smile. "Good. I never imagined it, from your behavior."

"Baka kitsune." Hiei walks over to him, and surprisingly puts a hand on his shoulder. "I'm happy that I arrived in time to stop you. Ahou."

Kurama looks at him, surprised by his gentleness, his softness. And suddenly the demon leans over him, his muscled — but slim — arms around his shoulders.

"Tell me, Kurama," just a whisper. "Are you happy? Do you... do you like me?"

Just a second, and then Kurama holds him warmly.

"You're my best friend, Hiei."

And the look in your eyes
Telling me no
Then you say you love me
That you'll never leave me
I know you're wrong
You're not that strong
Just let me go

Silence: deep and heartbreaking. Then Hiei softly pulls apart, and smiles at him bitterly — so bitterly — his eyes far away.

"What happened to you, Hiei?"

"I learned some things, kitsune."

So I don't want to learn to
Touch you
Hold you
Think that you're mine
Because it ain't no joy
For this forbidden boy
Whose teacher has told him good-bye

"Tell me, Hiei."

Hiei sits in the window frame, his red eyes closed on a distant image. Then he looks at the red-haired boy, and says softly: "You will like it. It's a story."

"A story?"

"Yes. A Makai fairy tale. About a snow-princess with pale blue hair and milky eyes, called Yukina."

Kurama comes over next to him and sits beside him on the floor, interested as always.

You're so curious, my kitsune.
What am I saying? You ARE a kitsune, after all.

"She lived in another world, a world of happiness and adventure. To protect her, she had a brother — Master of Fire — and a lover..." The youkai looks at the ceiling, then closes his eyes again with a tired smile. "...A lover, a prince of this world, a red-haired swordsman. But one day, their world was threatened and attacked... They saved it, but the princess died with her lover."

"And the Master of Flames?"

"I don't know." Hiei stops and puts his hand on the window frame. "I'd bet he lost his love too, and became a wanderer, maybe."

"That's a sad story, Hiei."

The demon glances at the youko.

You're really all I like in this world. It's a Ningen phrase, but in my case it's really true.

"It's a Makai tale, kitsune. Bye."

"Hiei, wait!!"

Too late. The demon moves through the night like a shadow. Kurama, alone in the window, can only smile. Maybe his beloved little Master of Fire will come again soon.

He did leave his cloak here.

Because the last one I had
Is my pride.
So I don't want to learn to
Hold you, touch you...
Think that you're mine
Because it ain't no joy
For a forbidden boy
Whose teacher has told him good-bye
So cold
Inside
Maybe just one more try.

The End

lyrics* George Michael