Nothing Changes Love

By Michelle McKague

Disclaimer- Xander, angel, Buffy, and Willow belong to Joss Whedon, The WB, Mutant Enemy, and 20th Century Fox. So please don’t sue me, I’m not claiming to own them, nor am I making any money off this.

Author’s Notes- Xander fans beware, some character bashing. He’s the villain of the piece. This is for B/A fans, I reunite them. Enjoy.

Spoilers- Nothing really.

It was hard to believe Xander was dead.

He was only 28.

Buffy offered to pack his things up and do something with them.

She knew she should be more broken up, she had dated him after all. But she only felt a pang of sadness, and only then for the old Xander, the one she felt disappear.

This Xander was bitter, and he had a nasty streak in him. One that sometimes had made her shudder.

She turned her thoughts away from that, and went into his bedroom. She opened the drawer of his night stand, she was surprised to see a letter there she opened it, not bothering to read the postmark.

She paused in shock, and kept reading one paragraph over and over.

“I love you. That’s the main reason I wrote. I need to know how you feel. A new Hellmouth has sprung up in Sydney, if I don’t get a reply, I’ll assume you no longer care and go. But if you do still love me, then I want a second chance. It’s entirely up to you, I know there’s a good chance this is completely unwelcome. It’s been 5 years since I left, and we’ve only had minimal contact. Besides I left to give you a normal life, one I know you have.”

There was more, but she didn’t bother to read it.

She knew enough. That was why Angel had left without saying goodbye, he thought she didn’t love him anymore. She was puzzled for a minute on how Xander could have gotten the letter, until she remembered that he had a key, he lived in the same building as her at that time.

It made sense. Everything made sense.

How could Xander have done such a thing?

Just then Willow walked in.

“Buffy what’s wrong?” She asked, making no pretence of grief. She and Xander had parted ways long ago, she was only there because of some emotion for her childhood friend, not the man he had become.

Buffy handed her the letter. Willow took it, and her eyes widened in horror. “Did you ever get this?”

Buffy shook her head. “No. Xander hid it from me, I just found it.”

She started to cry, Willow held her. “Oh, Buffy. What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know, I really don’t.” Buffy said, still crying.

Crying for so many reasons. For Angel and the pain he must have felt when she never responded to his letter. For Xander, the real Xander, and whatever had made him become the cold and evil man who had died only last week. And for herself, for all the truths and lies, and because she had been denying herself this for so long.

The right to cry.

* * * * *

Angel stepped out of the car on to the lawn.

He didn’t know why he was doing this, why he was here. He hadn’t like Xander, there had been no love between the two of them. Yet, Angel knew he had to do this, for Buffy.

Buffy.

He shook his head, he didn’t let himself think about her. It hurt too much to know that she had moved on while he couldn’t.

Suddenly he saw her, she walked out of the house. She paused when she saw him. Then she ran towards him something white in her hand.

“Angel.” She cried, burying her head in his shoulder.

Angel held her, never wanting to let go, but finally he pulled away. “Hello.” He said distantly, she looked at him for a second then handed him something.

It was the letter he had written her, the one she had never responded to.

She answered his silent question. “I just found it, Angel I never got it. Xander hid it.”

“So, you still care?” He asked, clinging to a last hope.

Buffy nodded. “Yes.” She said simply.

He held her tight, there would be time later to talk everything over, but now. Now he just needed to hold her, to make sure this was real.

He had her back, he finally had Buffy back, after waiting so long.

* * * * *

Buffy looked around at the living room full of friends. “How many of you are really mourning for Xander?” She asked, nobody said anything. “I thought so. Let’s face it, we all hated the person he ha become. So let’s not think about that, instead lets focus on the other Xander. The one we knew 10 years ago.”

Willow looked at her seriously. “That’s a good idea. We can remember him for what he was, not what he became.”

Everyone agreed.

Their Xander had died long ago, but they were finally going to say a true farewell to him.

To the boy they had loved dearly, not the monster he had become.

Buffy clasped Angel’s hand. Xander had failed, he had tried to part them, for awhile he had succeed, but not in the long run. In the end they would always be together, they could overcome anything.

Even Xander’s vicious interference, but that didn’t matter anymore. He was dead, and they were together.

They didn’t even hate him, they couldn’t, for as much they had hated him now, they had once loved him dearly. Nothing could change that, for some things never change and love’s one of them.

You do stop loving people, but the love you once had for them never goes away, and in some cases love doesn’t either.

Like Buffy and Angel.

Their love would never die.

The End