"To Depths Unknown"23, 24 &25

by Leslie

"To Depths Unknown"

Chapter 23

Jax went to bed that night, thinking of Kendall and Jensen, and what a special day it had been for them.

Once Jensen had realized she could take a few steps, she "practiced" all day -- taking three steps -- falling down -- getting back up -- then repeating the process. It was a cycle of wonderful discovery for her.

Kendall had spent most of Jensen's naptime updating her baby book, recording her latest achievement in detail.

As he started to fall off to sleep, the image of Kendall dancing in the kitchen monopolized his thoughts, insuring he'd have sweet dreams.

His sweet dreams turned out to be more like a nightmare! He woke up repeatedly with an itch that wouldn't stop. He applied some more calamine himself, not wanting to wake Kendall. He walked around the bedroom trying to air dry the lotion, but the itching only seemed to intensify. He had felt the urge to scratch all day, but never to this degree.

"How much longer am I going to have to live in torment??" he said out loud. He went into the bathroom and began rummaging through the cabinets and drawers, trying to find something to help. It was all this rummaging that woke Kendall and summoned her to her own bedroom, still occupied by Jax.

She walked in on Jax, who had gotten her loofa sponge and turned it into a back scratcher.

"Hey!" Kendall fussed. "That's not what that's for! Give it here! You're not supposed to be scratching anyway! It'll only make it worse."

"That's easy for you to say! You don't feel like you have athlete's foot all over your body!"

"No, I can't say as I do! Jax -- Jax! Stop scratching!!"

"It's the only thing that gives me relief!"

"Have you reapplied the calamine?"

"Yes, but to no avail!"

"Isn't it working?"

"Not near enough! Don't you have anything stronger?"

"Sorry -- only comes in bite-me strength!!!"

"That wasn't very nice!"

"It's 2:30 in the morning Jax, what do you expect?"

"Some understanding! I think I deserve a little sympathy here!"

"Ok. The only thing that worked for Jensen at this stage was the oatmeal bath."

"Kendall -- I'm really not in the mood for your warped sense of humor right now! I'm itching out of control."

"It's not a joke. Look," Kendall opened the cabinet and took out the box of oatmeal bath, "read the the box for yourself."

Jax read it and looked at her as if he still didn't believe what he saw.

"So -- what? You think I had them print the box up just to trick you?"

"Somehow it wouldn't surprise me!"

"Jax, it's either the oatmeal bath or death by itching. Pick one!"

"Alright -- oatmeal bath. But if this is a joke . . . !"

"It's not a joke. I'll help you fix it."

Kendall drew Jax's bath. Not too hot -- not too cold. Then she mixed in the oatmeal powder.

Jax stood over her watching her. "That looks disgusting! I'm not getting in there!"

"You will if you want to stop itching," she told him. "It's up to you." She turned the water off. "It's ready." she rose to leave.

"So, I'm just supposed to sit in it?"

"Yeah -- make sure you kind of sink down in it to cover all those scabs."

"What about my face?"

"Take a deep breath and go under!" she couldn't hold back the laughter.

"You're kidding, right?"

"Jax -- you're such a baby! Yes -- I'm kidding! Just pat a little on your face where the scabs are, and let it sit there for about 20 minutes."

"Twenty minutes?!? Kendall -- if this is a joke . . . "

"Read my lips Jax -- IT'S NOT A JOKE! Now, I'll be in the next room -- in case you need me."

Kendall left Jax standing in the bathroom, looking at the goo in the tub and feeling extremely apprehensive. The itching was just too strong. At this point he'd try anything, joke or not. He removed what was left of his clothing and stepped in uncertainly.

He got situated in the tub, feeling more ridiculous than he'd ever felt in his life. He came to the conclusion that mud bath treatments at a spa must feel like this. He sunk down in it like Kendall had told him. He even patted a little on his face. The he laid his head against the back of the tub and waited for twenty minutes to pass.

Kendall had turned on the TV and was flipping around trying to find something to watch. Infommercial . . . . infommercial . . . . . infommercial . . . . Hey! There's that movie we started watching the other night! She fluffed up the pillows and got comfortable.

Jax called out from the bathroom, "Hey, Kendall, watch the clock for me."

"Okay," she answered. She looked at the clock. It was 2:52.

Jax was feeling much better. The oatmeal bath had indeed soothed his itching. In his mind, Kendall had redeemed herself -- for now! He felt so relaxed.

He got to thinking about how he and Jerry had played in the dirt and mud as kids and how much fun they'd had, much to the chagrin of their mother. She'd hosed them down on more than one occasion before allowing them to enter the house.

He thought about Lady Jane, wondering how she would react to his Mother's Day surprises. He wished he could be there to see the look on her face. For him, the best part of giving a gift was sharing in the joy and excitement of the recipient.

That train of thought led him to Kendall. He had an idea of what he wanted to do for her, but figured she would disapprove of his doing anything at all. She sure is a hard one to figure out. He began to formulate his plan for Mother's Day.

After is seemed like plenty of time had gone by, he began to get a little ansy. Surely it's been twenty minutes. Then again, maybe it just seems that way to me. Kendall will tell me when time's up. He had complete faith in her, albeit misplaced.

Kendall was asleep. Cozy, comfy and conked out!

Jax let some more time pass and then said out loud to himself, "I know it's been twenty minutes now! Kendall." he called out to her. No response. I knew it!! I knew she was playing me for a fool!! She'll get hers! He plotted his revenge and then got things ready!

"Kendall!!!" Jax called very loudly. "Kendall -- I need you -- come quick!!!"

She jumped up and rushed to the bathroom. "What? What's the matter?" She was a little dazed.

"My leg won't bend. My joints feel like they're stiffening. I can't get up. I need your help." He looked so serious and so scared, that Kendall didn't doubt him in the least.

Without hesitating, she went to the edge of the tub and sat down. She braced herself and offerred her arm as leverage. "Here, you hold my arm and pull yourself up. Will that work?"

"Yeah, that'll work!" This was easier than I thought! She bought it!!

Jax reached over, took Kendall by the arm and pulled her down in the sludge she'd let him sit in far too long.

Kendall was shocked and speechless! Jax roared with laughter, and when he got control of himself, said "I can give as good as I get, Kendall Madisson!"

His arms around her, holding her, he took a handful of oatmeal bath and smeared her face with it.

She wiggled and struggled. "Jax this wasn't a joke! I promise!" she tried to convince him.

"Maybe not, but I've been in here for longer than twenty minutes! How long were you going to leave me here?!?"

"I must have fallen asleep. I'm sorry. I didn't do it on purpose." She had stopped struggling to get out.

Jax felt bad. She looked so innocent. "I apologize. I assumed you were playing a joke on me. It's three-something in the morning -- of course you're tired." He looked down at her gown and her legs and back up at her face -- all coated with his revenge this time. "Can you forgive me?"

"I think so. That was a pretty good act you put on! You had me convinced!"

"Convinced of what?"

"That you needed me."

"Who said that was an act?" Kendall had no reply to that. But Jax wasn't waiting for one. He took her smudged face in his hand and brought her to him. Kendall was more than happy to cooperate.

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"To Depths Unknown"

Chapter 24

Jax cradled Kendall in his lap, fully enjoying the close proximity the confines of the tub dictated. He kissed her with a passion that hadn't been tapped in over a year.

Kendall welcomed it, and returned to him a kiss the likes of which Jax had never been on the receiving end of.

They were engrossed in their kiss and entangled with each other. They'd both thrown caution to the wind and had given in to the fear of the unknown, uncertain and unpredictable.

Jax's lips briefly left hers, only to whisper in her ear, "This makes having the chicken pox seem worth it!"

She nuzzled her face against his.

He began to brush his lips against that curve of her neck that he found so irresistable.

"Jax," she whispered.

"You're not going to interrupt me like you did the first time, are you?"

She didn't want to. She really didn't want to! "Wouldn't you like to get out of this oatmeal?"

"Not particularly." And he kissed her again.

She allowed herself to be derailed by his fervor.

What Jax had appreciated about the tub's confines eventually began to annoy him. "Come on," he suggested. Then they both began to struggle to remove themselves from the mire.

Jax managed to get his footing and pull Kendall up. She was staring at him with the oddest look on her face.

Jax looked down and realized what had her so mesmerized. In an attempt at modesty, he had pulled on a pair of boxers, knowing he would be pulling Kendall in with him. He hadn't wanted to offend her. They were now heavy with oatmeal and sagging unbecomingly.

Kendall got the giggles and couldn't stop laughing.

Jax found it more than a little amusing himself.

"Why is it that both times we've kissed I look like I haven't bathed in weeks?" Jax asked.

Kendall was still giggling. "Maybe now is a good time for one!" she suggested.

"You're not trying to do that 'change the subject' trick again -- because it won't work this time!"

The look in Kendall's eyes told Jax what he didn't want to know. She was having second thoughts.

"Jax . . . " she couldn't finish her sentence. She wanted him so much, but at the same time, she wanted to get as far away from him as possible. She was giving credence to her fears.

"It's okay. There's no hurry." He looked at her with eyes that understood. "Go take a shower in my room. I'll finish up here and we can meet back on the couch and talk for awhile. How would that be?"

"I think that would be good."

Jax's shower was quick, so as not to aggravate his skin any further. He had no clean clothes at all in her bedroom, so he went to his room to get them. His plan was to grab something really quick and be on his way -- until he heard her.

Kendall was sobbing in the shower. The water running down her, intermingling with her tears.

Jax didn't know what to do. He could go back downstairs and give Kendall her privacy. Or, he could offer to help. His heart's instructions were clear.

"Kendall . . . it's me." He didn't want to pry and he didn't know what to say. He just wanted her to know that she didn't have to deal with whatever it is by herself.

She turned the shower off. Jax handed her a towel over the shower curtain.

"Do you want me to leave?" he offerred, his voice laced with tenderness and concern.

"Not really. Will you just wait for me outside the door? I'll be out in just a few minutes, ok?"

"Ok."

Kendall dried herself off, got herself together and freshened herself up a little.

She entered the bedroom in her robe, her hair still wet. But Jax thought she looked beautiful. The only thing missing was her smile.

"I guess I owe you an explanation."

"Only if you want to give me one."

Kendall thought for a minute. "I do."

Jax was sitting on his bed, still wrapped in his towel. Having heard Kendall crying, he'd forgotten the original purpose of his trip.

"I'm not good at sharing my feelings, so bear with me, okay?"

"I will."

Kendall walked ot the bed and sat down beside him. She swallowed hard, trying to make the lump in her throat disappear. It didn't work.

Jax watched her struggle to find the words to begin, and when she couldn't, he offerred up his, "Kendall, the last thing I meant to do was rush you."

Tears filled her eyes as she listened to his words. She looked at him -- her blue, sad eyes brimming with the tears she wished wouldn't come -- and managed to say, "You didn't do anything wrong. I did. Jax, I'm going to be completely honest with you, and if it scares you off - then so be it! My marriage to Blake was amazing in the beginning. He was a doting husband who made me feel like I was the center of his universe. He showered me with love and affection and attention. But, things eventually started to change. As he went up the 'ladder', he seemed to leave me behind. I couldn't understand what was happening! I was just so sure of his love!"

There was a familiar stab in Jax's heart.

"I felt him distancing himself from me emotionally. I thought he had found someone else. He hadn't. I thought maybe he was in financial trouble. He wasn't. I thought he still loved me, but just wasn't able to show me. He didn't. He no longer shared his life with me. He shut me out. I had trusted him with my heart. I had pledge my life to him!"

The knife in Jax's heart twisted.

"I can't go there again, Jax. I can't feel that depth of pain again. I hoped I would be able to trust someone again, but I can't."

"You can't live your life alone just because Blake destroyed your trust in love!" His own words were like salt on his stab wound! It hurt like hell -- but it was a necessary part of the healing.

"Jax, you don't get it! It's not love I distrust! It's not even Blake! It's me! I don't trust myself!"

Jax gritted his teeth. He knew this pain all to well.

Kendall continued, "I was so sure of Blake -- so sure I could turn him around if I tried harder!"

Jax's demons were surfacing.

"That's why I got pregnant with Jensen. Call it my last ditch effort to save my marriage. As you can see, I failed."

Jax regained control, somehow feeling more clear-headed than he'd felt in months. "Kendall -- you didn't fail! Blake failed you! You gave it all you had and more, and he chose not to accept it! He didn't deserve you!"

Kendall's tears flowed freely. Jax was fighting his back. "Come 'ere," he said pulling her to him, "It's okay. Everything's going to be okay."

And in his own heart, resolution had come. He was going to heal. There was going to be life after Brenda after all, something he wasn't sure of before. It was just going to take time.

**************

"To Depths Unknown"

Chapter 25

Their talk had proven to be a catharsis of sorts for each of them. Their feelings of fear had been expressed and purged. It was all out in the open now.

After Kendall's cry, Jax had shared with her his own fears and distrust of himself and relived the intricate details of his and Brenda's relationship, and it's demise. He even told her about Miranda. Jax had learned a lesson -- he would never go headfirst into a relationship again with anything less than total honesty.

Their talk was no magic answer, but it was a start.

^^^^^^^^

As the days passed, there was an obvious change in Jax and Kendall. They had battled their demons and emerged victorious. The excess baggage had been cast aside and they felt a peace and a freedom from fear that seemed to breathe new life into them.

Mother's Day was the next day, and Jax had a few details to wrap up. He was full of anticipation and excitement. He had been sneaking behind Kendall's back plotting and planning. He had a satisfied smile on his face as he thought through the details of the day. Now, to set the stage! "Kendall, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure, what's up?" She was so light-hearted. Her mood was reflected in the tone of her voice and the pleasant look on her face.

"I was wondering if I could cook you dinner tomorrow night, as a token of my appreciation for all you've done for me this past week?"

"You don't have to do that."

"I want to. Will you let me?"

She smiled that beautiful smile and her eyes smiled right along with it! "Of course I will. You can cook, can't you?"

"You'll just have to wait and see!"

And wait she did, envisioning a wonderful evening.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Jax and Kendall had gone back to sleeping in their own beds days ago. Jensen and Jax improved every day with their chicken pox. Jensen was almost 100% better. Jax still battled the itching and still had the scabs, but it was all less noticeable.

Kendall had slept in, still tired from the late nights and early mornings of the preceeding week. She was awakened by the clatter of dishes and the smell of fresh coffee. Mmmm, coffee! She listened for Jensen, and when she didn't hear her, decided to take a shower before breakfast, something she usually didn't have time to do.

She tarried in there longer than she meant to, but she enjoyed every peaceful, self-indulgent minute of it. It's Mother's Day! I deserve a little treat! Blake had not even acknowledged her on her first Mother's Day last year, which had hurt her so deeply. So, almost as a matter of protection, she had lowered her expectations of the day, so as not to get hurt again. She would just enjoy Jensen and her antics and that would be enough!

She got dressed and ready and headed out towards the kitchen. She could hear Jax talking in a very strange voice . . . .

" . . . . then you put them in a 350 degree oven for 20 to 30 minutes, or until golden brown," he instructed in his best Julia Child imitation.

Kendall heard Jensen squeal and giggle, and then she heard a loud "Clang, clang, clang!" She rushed around the corner, and there was Jensen, sitting on the floor -- wooden spoon and metal bowl in hand -- banging to her heart's content. She lit up when she saw her mother.

"Good morning, baby girl. What's all this?"

Jensen stood up and toddled clumsily over to her mother, who scooped her up and gave her a big hug. It still made her heart swell with pride to see her little baby walk.

"G'morning. It's Mother's Day and Jensen wanted you to have a special breakfast. We didn't know what your favorites are, so we fixed Jensens' favorite -- blueberry muffins. Hope that's OK."

"It's more than ok." She beamed at Jax. "Thank you. And thank you too, sweetie," she said covering Jensen's face with little kisses. "Do I smell coffee?" she asked eagerly.

Jax laughed, "You don't miss a thing! Yes, there's coffee. Sit down and I'll pour you some."

"I can get it."

"It's our turn to take care of you for a day." Jax smiled, seeing how pleased and surprised Kendall looked.

Our turn. His words echoed in her mind. Sounds so all-inclusive. It seemed like a dream -- too good to be true.

"I thought you were going to cook dinner, not breakfast."

"There will be three meals today, none of which will require you to cook."

"My goodness! A girl could get used to this!"

"A girl like you deserves it."

Kendall crinkled her nose and grinned, almost embarrassed by his sweetness.

Breakfast was a success -- and a pleasure for all three of them.

Jax watched Kendall soak in all of the attention she had craved. Phase 1 complete! he thought.

After they finished, Jax exiled mother and daughter to the living room so that he could clean up after himself. Kendall was overwhelmed with his kindness! On her way out, she happened to look down the hall and she noticed that the door between the penthouses was closed. That's odd, she thought. "Jax, why is the door closed to your place?"

"Aren't you the observant one?"

"You're pulling a 'Kendall'! I can recognize my own trademark!"

"Then you know how annoying it is!"

"Touche'."

"So -- you're done quizzing me?"

"For now," she smiled playfully.

^^^^^^^^^

Jax listened and Jensen and Kendall played their sing-songy games in the other room. He finished up the task at hand and joined them.

He coaxed Jensen to him and whispered in her ear. Of course she had no clue what he was saying, but you couldn't tell it by her smile.

"What are you two up to?"

"Patience, patience. Perfection takes time." Jax led Jensen over to the bookcase and pulled a pink envelope from between two books.

He gave it to Jensen and said, "Give it to your Mommy." Jensen thought it was a toy for herself and waved it wrecklessly in the air. Jax panicked, but Kendall reassured him that it was okay.

The card made it to Kendall in one piece, and Jax took Jensen and placed her on his lap as they watched her open it.

It was a beautiful card with a picture of a rose garden and a very thoughtful message. But the most meaningful part of the card was Jensen's handprint, that had been stamped on one side. Kendall was so touched. "How did you do this?"

"A stamp pad and lots of baby wipes!" Jax explained.

Her heart felt like it would burst.

"Don't go weepy on me yet! We're not done!" Jax got up and picked Jensen up in his arms. "We're going to play a game."

Kendall was intrigued.

He and Jensen left the room for more than a few minutes and returned with a handful of paper. "These are the playing cards. You hold on to them, but don't read them! Can I trust you?"

"I'm no cheater!"

"Ok, we'll be right back! Got to set up the game!" Jax was just that like overgrown little boy again, enjoying himself as much as Jensen was! "No peeping," he reminded.

While they were gone, Kendall squirmed with anxiousness. What in the world could they be doing? Her curiousity was about to get the better of her when the secretive pair bounded back into the room.

"Okay! You ready to play? Jensen and I call this game 'Treasure Hunt'. You have to follow my instructions to the 'T'. Can you do that?"

"Yes, sir!" she saluted dramatically.

"Alright then. Turn the card on top over and follow the instructions to Treasure #1!"

Kendall flipped the card over. It read, "For the first surprise of your day -- follow blue footsteps, they'll lead the way." Kendall laughed and looked up at Jax a little confused.

"Go on -- do what it says!"

She arose and walked out into the hall where various sets of different colored footprints led off in all different directions. They were the tiniest construction paper footprints and they were taped to the floor. Jax had traced Jensen's foot and cut them out to make a trail. Kendall was in awe.

"The blue ones!" Jax reminded.

Kendall followed them into the foyer, where there was a huge bouquet of the most beautiful pink roses she had ever seen. "Oh my gosh! These are gorgeous!" She breathed in their scent and held it there. "Jax, Jensen -- I'm speechless!"

"Good," Jax said, "then we can move on."

"There's more?"

"There's more. Next card, please."

This card read, "From here pink footsteps lead the way to the second treasure of the day."

Kendall looked down and followed them into the kitchen, where she found a little card welcoming her into the "Coffee of the Month" club. She giggled gleefully.

"Tell me I don't know the real key to a woman's heart!" Jax toyed. He felt a sense of nervousness as he told her to read the next card.

It simply read, "Follow red footsteps wherever they go. I want you to see a little show." Kendall looked at Jax. "You're quite the poet!"

"I wouldn't go that far." He walked on ahead of her to ready Treasure #3. When she entered her bedroom, there was a video camera on top of her TV with a red bow on it. And on the TV, Jax had began playing a tape. It was a tape of Jensen -- walking -- laughing -- with Jax's voice in the background, encouraging her, just as Kendall had the day she took her first steps.

Kendall's tears flowed freely. Her chin quivered as she scooped up Jensen and held her close. She walked over to Jax and stood on her tiptoes and kissed him softly on his cheek. Then she whispered, "Thank you, Jax. Thank you for making this day so special for me."

Jax closed his eyes and hugged her. He too was loving every moment of this day. He had touched Kendall's heart. He had given her the recognition he felt she deserved.

He pulled back and looked at her -- her joy so apparent. "There's one more card."

She looked at Jax as if she couldn't believe there was more. Then she read the final card which said, "It's Mother's Day, Kendall and you deserve the best life has to give you, but you're on your own with this one -- I'm not going to give you a clue!"

Kendall laughed. Jensen laughed. Jax just stood there.

"You've got to help me out a little. I don't see any more footprints."

"Nope. Like the card said, you're on your own. I'll tell you this though, it's something we talked about the other day."

"Could you be a little more specific? Give me a little hint -- something!"

"Ummmmmmm, No!!! Think, Kendall!"

She thought back over the past week, but it was too much! She couldn't possibly remember every little thing they'd talked about."

"Ok," he said getting impatient, "one little hint. It's somewhere you wouldn't expect it to be."

"Oh, yeah! That helps! Thanks alot!"

"Think, Kendall!!! Anything seem out of sorts to you this morning?"

She closed her eyes and reviewed the morning in her mind.

"The door to the penthouse!!" Jax's grin confirmed that she was right. "Can I go?"

"Be my guest!" He picked up Jensen and followed Kendall's quickened pace. She got to his door and stopped, looking back over her shoulder to make sure it was okay to go on.

"Go," he said nodding.

She opened his door slowly and peered around the room. She hadn't been in there too many times and she wasn't sure if she would notice the surprise. But as the door came completely opened, she saw it.

That can't be it! she thought. She put both hands over her mouth in total disbelief. She spun around to look at Jax, still holding Jensen.

"Happy Mother's Day, Kendall."

She shook her head, "Oh, no Jax, this is too much!"

"Shhhh. You're worth it! Go on -- take a closer look."

Her heart pounding, her steps uncertain, her hands shaking -- she drew closer to a gift she couldn't believe she'd been given.

It was a shiny, black Baby Grand piano! On the velvet covered piano bench was a single piece of sheet music -- "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay'.

Jax watched the paper tremble and his heart was full. He'd done what he set out to do. He'd made her feel as special as he believed she was.

Her cheeks were crimson from the emotion of the moment. She didn't know what to say. "You gave me one of my 'Go There' songs!" He could barely hear her speak.

"It's yours on one condition."

"What's that?" Kendall asked.

"That when you 'Go There' -- you let me go with you."

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