Click of a Mouse-1 to 3

I got a little bored the other night & started thinking about this story. Now the idea won't go away. It's called The Click of a Mouse & takes place a few years from now with altered GH events.
Jax & Brenda still aren't back together, years after Sonny left her at the alter. Brenda did have her break down & she thought Jax was missing. Brenda also had the crash with Jason but unlike on the real GH, Jax and Brenda never reconciled. Jax & Brenda both are dating & have been dating but none of the relationships have been serious, in fact Jax & Brenda are known for being quite excellent matchmakers, not that they try to be but everytime they
try & double date they get so involved in their own conversation that many of their date pairings have gotten together & become quite happy.
As the story begins, Brenda finds herself at one of Jax's laptops at three in the morning. A few weeks ago Jax went off on yet another business trip, it seemed to Brenda that each trip seemed to get longer & longer, which made her sleep less & less. Before leaving on this trip Jax left one of his laptops with Brenda so that she could e-mail him whenever she needed to get in touch with him & couldn't reach him by phone. Brenda used it for that
reason as well as to make it appear that she didn't' miss him as much as she did. She developed a system to keep her phone calls to him to a reasonable amount: she wouldn't call him after eight or before ten in the morning, for every ten calls she wanted to make, she would only make one. Between calls she would write e-mails to Jax, some that she would send, some that she wouldn't. Just recently she decided that she would only call him once every
other day (she knew that Jax would call on the days she didn't since they very rarely went a day without speaking).
So Brenda finds herself not able to sleep & immediately goes to Jax's lap top. Since it's the middle of the night & Jax would know she's having trouble sleeping if she e-mailed him & she already sent three or four e-mails to him that day (well actually the day before but since Bren didn't sleep she still considered it the same day) Brenda decides to write one of the e-mails that she would never send (yet didn't seem to be able to get rid of either).
At least she would never send it on purpose (he he) but mistakes do happen!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brenda smiles as she finishes her e-mail to Jax. She quickly types Love, Brenda to end the e-mail completely. Feeling a great sense of accomplishment that she was able to get all of her feelings off her chest, so to speak, Brenda reaches for her glass of Pepsi. That's when it happens. The thing that brings a look of pure horror to Brenda's face & sends her into a fantastic panic. . .
Brenda looks at the screen one more time & sees that she really did it, she sent the e-mail. The e-mail that was supposed to be personal between her & her Jax, the Jax that she married, the Jax that was still in love with her, not the Jax who was off on yet another business trip, the one who was dating a new woman everytime she turned around. How could this have happened?, was Brenda's first thought, but she knew. She was careless, she reached for
her drink & must have clicked the mouse on send, it was the only explanation. Why hadn't she saved it on the disk before getting the glass? Did she send it on purpose? She knew the answer to that, or at least she thought she did.
She gave up any rights she had to his love the day she walked out of the penthouse and met Sonny on the docks. She left him & hurt him more then she wanted to admit, even years later it hurt her to think about what she did to his heart. Jax made it clear that they couldn't be more then what they currently were, friends, best friends. Sure Jax had stuck by her through everything after Sonny humiliated her by leaving her at the alter
(something she would later be very grateful for), including her breakdowns, but through out it all he made it very clear that he was there because he's her best friend, nothing more. Even if she could have given him more at that time, he wouldn't allow himself to want more or even think that more was possible. Jax always said that Brenda was stubborn but the truth was that Jax could be much more stubborn then she, especially when it came to
protecting his heart. Brenda knew that he was just shielding himself from the pain that she caused him & that if they had even a minuscule chance of being more then friends, ever again, it would have to be Jax's decision & she would have to be very patient. But now there was no time to be patient, Brenda had to find a way to unsend that e-mail. She couldn't let Jax read it, she couldn't risk losing the only connection she had left to him, their
friendship. If she had to go the rest of her life without ever making love to him again, she could handle it but she couldn't go on another day without having his friendship, not one single day, there was no way she could survive without him. Like it or not, the day she walked into his penthouse (to return Lois' gift) her life changed for the better & try as she did to resist Jax, he was irresistible. Jax won her heart during their too brief
marriage and, no matter how much either of them tried to deny it, it was now his to keep. If Jax cut his ties to Brenda now she would be completely lost. She made him her family as well as her closest friend. Each of her friendships that used to be so important to her now paled in comparison to what she had with Jax. She spent every holiday & special occasion by Jax's side & that's where she needed to be. Jax couldn't get this e-mail it would
ruin everything.
Brenda's first attempt wasn't worth the effort, she tried to unsend the e-mail but since Jax was using a different service, her effort was useless. Brenda's next attempt was also useless, she went through every file on the laptop in an effort to find a way to stop the message, but nothing worked. Brenda's next move was to pick up the phone. She quickly dialed the phone as sweat beamed down her face. Brenda's persistence (or as Jax liked to call
it, stubbornness) finally paid off after she redialed the number about eight times.

B: "Ned, I need your help"

Ned's voice sounded like a cartoon character as he tried to sound as if Brenda didn't wake him up even though she knew that she did, but didn't really care. She had an emergency & if it meant waking everyone up in Port Charles it was well worth it.

N: "Brenda, What's wrong?"

Brenda's voice is panicked as she tries to convey the urgency of her situation.

B: "I need you to come over here right now, You know a lot about computers right?"
Ned's voice is half way between a cartoon character and his own voice.

N: "What's this about Brenda?"
B: "I hit something on Jax's lap top & lost something that's very important, I have to get it back now!"
N: "I know more then the average person about computers but in no way am I a computer genius"
B: "Can't you at least try? This really is an emergency"
N: "First thing in the morning I'll be over"
B: "That's too late Ned, I need you here now."
N: "Okay but this better be important".

Brenda's voice finally takes on a happy tone as she thanks Ned.

B: "Thank you, Thank you Ned.I love you, you're the best."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ned finds Brenda pacing around her cottage with the door wide open.

N: "Brenda you really should keep this door locked"
B: "I heard you drive up".

Brenda quickly locks the door & moves back to the lap top.

N: "Now what's this emergency of yours?"
B: "I have to get back an e-mail that I accidentally sent".
N: "Is that all?"
B: "So you can do it?"

Bren looks at Ned who looks very proud of himself.

N: "It's quite simple, all I had to do was go to mail that you sent, now all you have to do is click on the one that you sent too soon & you can finish it & resend it letting the addressee know that you hit the wrong button earlier. I'm sure they will understand."

Ned immediately identifies the look on Brenda's face, it's a "You idiot" look, the same kind Lois gives him any time he does something she doesn't approve of concerning Brooke.

B: "I know how to view mail I sent, that's not the problem, I need to stop an e-mail before it gets where I sent it"
N: "Where would that be?"

Brenda sinks into the couch & quietly tells Ned the answer he anticipated before being told, the only person who could have Brenda in this much of a panic:

B: "Jax".

Ned's frustration from being woken up in the wee hours of the morning begins to show as he responds to Brenda.

N: "Why did you write an e-mail to Jax if you didn't want him to read it?"

Brenda speaks as if her answer is the most logical thing in the world.

B: "I couldn't sleep so I started typing. I must have clicked the mouse because before I knew it the e-mail was sent & I was on the phone with you."
N: "I don't see what the big deal is, just ask Jax not to read it"
B: "I can't, he'll know that I wrote something in there that I don't want him to see. Ned you have to get that e-mail back".
N: "I"ll try but I really don't see what I can do".

The next morning Brenda wakes up to the clicking of the keyboard. It turns out that poor Ned worked all night trying unsuccessfully to retrieve Brenda's message. He even tried calling Jax's internet server but they refused to help him & were quite insulted by his attempted bribes. Ned doesn't realize Brenda's up until he hears her devastated voice.

B: "No luck"
N: "Sorry. Once it's sent there's no way to get it back."

Brenda stumbles over to Ned & embraces him in a brief hug.

B: "Thanks for trying"
N: "I wish I could have helped. Good bye Brenda"
B: "Bye Ned, thanks for trying."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours after Ned left, Brenda is still in a panicked frenzy, worrying over rather or not Jax read her e-mail yet. Brenda said several prayers in hopes that it would somehow get lost, but there was no way of knowing for sure until Jax called, which he did while she was finishing up brushing her hair. As usual Brenda rushed to the phone in hopes that it was Jax, which it was.

B: "Hello"

Jax's voice fills Brenda's body with sweetness.

J: Hello beautiful"

Jax quickly detects a hint of sadness in Brenda's chipper voice.

B: "Jaaaaaaaaaax, how are you?"

Jax wastes no time before cutting to the point.

J: "Brenda I'm calling because I need to talk to you about something"
B: "You do?"
J: "Yeah, it's important".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What could Jax need to talk to Brenda about that's so important? Did he read her e-mail? Do you want to know? If you do I need some feedback! I'm already writing two fan fics so if you want this one to continue I need you to let me know.

So happy that we got Brenda's choice from the heart, Jax!
Darlene
J&B Angel/IRFC
GH Angel - Keeper of Jax's love for Brenda
J&B Reuniter

Chapter 2

The Click of a Mouse - Chapter 2

After a few minutes of deafening silence, Brenda’s thoughts run rampid wondering if the thing that Jax needs to speak to her about is the e-mail she accidentally sent.

B: “Jax, are you there?”
J: “Yeah, Bren I’m here”
B: “So what’s this important thing you need to talk to me about?”
J: “I’m sorry, someone just walked in, would you mind holding for a minute or two?”
B: “No, of course not”

As Brenda stays on hold her mind runs rampid trying to figure out if Jax indeed got & read her e-mail. Why else would he need to speak to her about something important? Then again Jax was quite good at making something sound much more drastic then it was. Maybe he just needed her to pick something up for him or arrange something. But why would he not come right out & say it rather then stay silent on the phone leaving her to wonder if he was still there? There was only one reason she could think of and she knew that she wouldn’t like it. He must have read the e-mail, she thought. Why else would he put off telling her what he needed to say, he never put her on hold and now just because someone walked in the room he had to put her on hold. This must be big. Big as in telling her that he could no longer be her friend or that he was doing the unthinkable, moving away from Port Charles for good. Or maybe, just maybe he got her e-mail and felt the same way, maybe clicking that darn mouse wasn’t such a horrible mistake. Maybe just maybe he would give their love another chance. Could that be possible? Brenda knew that it was not at all likely but she still could hope, couldn’t she? After all that is all she had left, her hopes and dreams of their life together.
Then Brenda’s mind went back to her original thought, Jax must be angry with her, that’s why he couldn’t stand to talk to her right now, that’s why she was on hold. She made her decision, Jax was going to end their relationship right there on the phone and there was nothing she could do about it. She would tell him that she loved him & cherished the time she had with him and their bond, but most of all their incredible friendship. She wouldn’t fight him, or guilt him into staying her friend, she didn’t need his pity. She would hold her head up high & wish him the best in life, then once he could no longer hear or see her, she would cry her eyes out and hope against hope that he would realize how much they mean to each other and how much they’ve grown to need each other, but this time she wouldn’t put herself first. Not this time, not ever again.
If he needed to cut all ties with her to make his life better, she would let him, after all, after the way she hurt him she didn’t deserve to have those ties. It would kill her heart, probably numb her of all feelings ever again but if this was her punishment for hurting the kindest, most loving person she ever met, she deserved it.
Then Brenda remembered how Jax started out their conversation, “Hello beautiful”. He wouldn’t have said that if he was going to end us, would he?, she thought. Just then something occurred to her, something more terrifying then Jax not wanting to speak to her ever again. . . Could it be that Jax decided to marry that Sally, Shiela, whatever her name was that he was currently dating. Could his nice comment simply be an easy way of building up to the fact that he was going to give his love to someone else. That’s one thing she couldn’t take. There’s no way that he could love that other woman as much as he loved Brenda. His eyes never sparkled when he looked at that other women, not the way they sparkled when he looked at Brenda. Even when he was furious with her, there was still that sparkle, that hint of love, of belonging.
Then something occurred to Brenda, something more horrifying then her last thought. Could it be that by some horrible accident, some freak of nature, SHE, that WOMAN managed to get herself pregnant, by Jax none the less. It couldn’t be. That Brenda couldn’t take. She couldn’t stand by & watch Jax have a child with another woman. She couldn’t just grin & bare that, not in this life time or the next. A marriage, that could be dissolved or destroyed, but a baby, a baby was permanent, forever. If Jax had a baby with someone else he would be bonded to them in a way that Brenda would never be able to break, she couldn’t let it happen. She could lose Jax, but not to another woman, that was sure to drive her back to the mental ward at GH. At that moment Brenda vowed not to sit & listen to Jax destroy everything she ever hoped for, to rip her dreams from her heart with a few simple words, either, “I’m marrying her” or “I’m going to be a father”.
Brenda simply wouldn’t allow him to get the words out, as soon as he came back on the line she would make a quick excuse and get off the phone. If Jax was going to destroy the hopes she had, even if they were very slim hopes, there was no way he was going to do it on the phone. He would have to look at her, face to face, & see what his little news was doing to her.
Of course Brenda had no idea what Jax really needed to talk to her about, she was just speculating: preparing herself for the worst, while still hoping for her world to do a one eighty and become extraordinary again, like when she was married to Jax. The dead silence was maddening to Brenda, maybe if there was music on Brenda could stop thinking up the horrible scenarios, but she knew Jax refused to put music on because he didn’t want to hear, “everyone who can’t sing try and sing.” Like he always said, “I’m not in the music business like you Brenda, the people I speak with don’t have wonderful voices, although most of them seem to think they do.”
Brenda slowed her heart a bit as she went back to her original thought, he’s not getting married, he’s not having a baby, he just got your e-mail. How much of a surprise could it be to him anyway? Your eyes give it away Brenda, you’re still in love with him, he would have to be blind not to see it. Explain to him that you don’t need more then his friendship, tell him you don’t need more, explain that it was a huge mistake, you never intended on sending it. He will understand or at least try to, he won’t throw you away that easily, after all look what he’s stuck through with you so far. Don’t blow this Brenda, don’t lose Jax completely!
Just then Brenda’s thoughts were interrupted by an angelic voice.

J: “Sorry I had you on hold for so long. I didn’t forget about you, I got stuck closing a deal that I thought I had until Friday to finish up.”

Brenda put on her bravest face, thinking that the brave face would help steady her voice as she prepared for the bad news she was sure Jax was about to deliver.

B: “That’s okay. So what’s this that you need to talk to me about?”
J: “I don’t know how to tell you this Brenda, but”

Brenda’s mind instantly goes into a panic, <>
Jax suddenly notices that Brenda’s end seems to have gone dead, he doesn’t hear a thing, not even the sound of her breath against the phone.

J: “Brenda, are you okay?”
B: “Yes, you haven’t even given me the bad news yet, I assume it’s bad?”
J: “You got so quiet, I thought something happened, that you got cut off.”

Brenda doesn’t let the fact that he avoided answering her question about rather the news was bad slip by.

B: “Is it bad news?”
J: “I think so”

Brenda’s mind eases a bit knowing that Jax thinks the news is bad, <>

B: “Go ahead and tell me, I can handle it”
J: “Okay, but I have to warn you. You’re probably going to be furious with me”

So he got the e-mail and doesn’t want to be more then friends, that’s fine I can handle that. As long as he’s still a part of my life, I can deal with that, Brenda thought while waiting for Jax to reveal whatever it was he was having so much trouble revealing.

B: “Just tell me Jax”
J: “Okay but don’t say I didn’t warn you. You know that dinner we have planned for a few weeks from now?”
B: “You mean the one at the fancy restaurant where it’s almost impossible to get a table, even when you try and slip them large chunks of cash”
J: “Yeah, that’s the one. I know we planned this a long time ago”

Brenda momentarily forgets that Jax is leading up to bad news, as she relaxes and converses with Jax.

B: “To celebrate your return from a long business trip, the last one you’ll take for awhile”
J: “I know how much you were looking forward to it. I was looking forward to it too, but something’s come up. Bren, what I’m trying to say is I don’t think I can make it”
B: “Why not?”
J: “Do you remember when I told you about my cousin Andrew?”
B: “The one who was like a second brother to you in Australia?”
J: “Yes. You know I haven’t seen him for a long time, & I rarely catch him when he’s home, so we always end up playing phone tag. The only real communication we have is through e-mails”
B: “Uh huh”
J: “I got an e-mail from him last night. He’s going to be in Port Charles that night & he wants to have dinner with me, alone. It’s the only night he’s going to be in Port Charles but if you”
B: “I understand Jax. You want to spend some time with your cousin. We can go to the restaurant another time”
J: “Bren I don’t think we’ll get reservations anytime soon”
B: “That’s okay, you can fly in some oysters to make up for it”
J: “They’re on their way as we speak. Are you sure this is okay with you Brenda?”

A small part of Jax hoped that Brenda would say no, that she wanted him to keep their dinner plans, but most of him wanted Brenda to be okay with this. He really did want to see Andrew, even if it meant not seeing Brenda for a day AFTER he returned to PC from yet another business trip.

B: “I’m fine with it. Are you going to spend the whole night with him?”

Jax immediately knew exactly what Brenda was getting at, she wanted to know if he would have time to stop by her cottage and see her, even if he could only stay for a few minutes. It was what he always wanted when he returned from a trip, and he knew that it was what Brenda wanted too.

J: “I’ll try to rent a video & stop by your house after dinner, if it’s not too late.”

Brenda wanted to say that it’s never too late for him to come by and see her especially after they were separated for days, but she didn’t, instead she settled for a single word.

B: “Okay.”
J: “You’re making this too easy”
B: “Did you expect me to throw a tantrum?”
J: “No, but I thought you would at least want me to buy you something or take you on a trip to make up for it”
B: “It’s just one night, we’ll have plenty more”
J: “You are taking this remarkably well”
B: “It’s not that big of a deal”

Brenda’s comment worried Jax. Not that big of a deal! They planned this dinner for months, and now he cancels it and she’s remarkably calm, what gives with Brenda tonight?, Jax wondered. If only he knew what she was thinking while on hold, he would understand why a canceled dinner wasn’t that big of a deal.

J: “Are you positive that you’re fine with this?”
B: “Yes. I’m a bit disappointed but I’ll get over it”
J: “I’m disappointed too. I’ll call and cancel the reservations tonight.”
B: “No, don’t do that”

For a moment Jax thinks that Brenda’s going to change her mind & say she wants to be with him that night, but she doesn’t.

J: “Why not? Change your mind?”
B: “I didn’t change my mind, it’s just that those reservations are so hard to get, don’t just throw them away”
J: “What should I do with them?”
B: “Go with Andrew. I know I can’t go, but at least you can; then you can tell me about it and we can decide if it’s worth going to another time.”
J: “You sure about this?”
B: “Yes, I’m sure. So when will you get back from this business trip?”
J: “I should get back tomorrow or the next day at the latest”
B: “How long before you have to leave again?”
J: “A few days”

Brenda wanted to ask if he would see HER, that woman that he was dating, the one who’s name she couldn’t seem to remember, not that she really tried. She liked to get their names wrong that way who ever happened to be lucky enough to date Jax at the time knew that his ex-wife, who also happened to be his best friend and the closest person to him, didn’t like or approve of him dating her, whoever she was at the time. Brenda held back and didn’t ask. She knew that Jax would come see her first and for her own sanity that’s really all she needed to know. As long as Jax went straight from the airport to her she could handle him dating, just as long as the person he was dating didn’t become more important to him then Brenda. For the time, all thoughts of the e-mail she accidentally sent, slipped her mind, a mistake she would later regret.
Just as Brenda wanted to know if Jax would see the woman he was dating, the one she couldn’t bare to call or even think of as his girlfriend, Jax wondered if Brenda was passing her spare time with the guy she was dating. Jax thought his name was Anthony, but he wasn’t even sure of that.
Neither Jax nor Brenda mentioned their curiosity, they focused on each other until Jax realized he was late for a meeting and had to go. Just after he said bye, Brenda remembered what she needed to ask him. Her voice started out low, then rose to a yell as she tried in vein to regain Jax’s attention.

B: “Jax, wait. JAX, I need to ask you something, Wait, Jax it’s important.”

Had Jax heard Brenda’s calls to him he would have gladly been late for his meeting, but by the time Brenda called out his receiver was already down. So Brenda never got a chance to ask Jax to delete her e-mail. She had to go on hoping that he would remain too busy to read his mail.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After keeping her eyes closed for a few minutes, soaking in the sweet sounds of Jax’s voice, still ringing in her head, Brenda got an idea. One she thought was somewhat brilliant, in fact she wondered why she didn’t think of it earlier. She would simply e-mail Jax again. In the subject line she would put delete my previous message, inside her e-mail she would explain that she accidentally sent something that wasn’t meant for Jax to see & it would mean a lot to her if he would just delete it. Jax would do it, for her he would do it without question. Then she could forget all about the mistake she made. It would work, it had to work, Jax meant too much to her for it not to work.
Brenda soon realized that it wasn’t as simple as it seemed. For some reason the stupid computer wouldn’t let her get through to Jax. Every message she sent him came back to her, undelivered. She didn’t understand what could have gone wrong, she was able to send e-mails to everyone except Jax, how could this be? Was it some sick joke?
After an hour of pure frustration, Brenda finally called Ned, but she couldn’t reach him. Ned was no where to be found & Brenda needed his help desperately, she left messages on his voice mail and answering machines, the only thing she could do now was wait. She tried to call Jax but Addie wouldn’t disturb his meeting, not even for Brenda, & she didn’t have access to his e-mail account either so she couldn’t help Brenda out.
Brenda thought about calling Anthony since he claimed to be a computer whiz, but how could she explain to him why she needed to get that e-mail back, what she wrote. Anthony would never understand. Finally Brenda decided that it didn’t matter. So what if Anthony didn’t understand. She wouldn’t be with him much longer anyway. Soon he would start pushing her to “make love to him” which simply meant have sex. There was no way she could make love to anyone but Jax and she knew it. She would either refuse his advances or try to do as he wanted, but she knew what would happen, what always happened. Brenda would pretend that he was Jax, that Jax was the one who wanted to make love to her. She would close her eyes and might even allow him, whoever HE happened to be at the moment, to satisfy her sexually, but she would never allow him to penetrate her. She might try to satisfy him as well, but she would pull back before he reached his peak, no matter how short of time that may be. But most importantly she knew what she would do to chase him away, the same thing she did to all the other guys over the last few years. Right when it came to that crucial moment, where she lost control and felt her insides shattering, she would scream out his name, Jax that is. That’s the only way she could lose control and peak, by pretending that it was Jax she was giving her control over to. Once she did that it wouldn’t be long before he would realize that he couldn’t take Jax’s place and he couldn’t stay and fall in love with her while she was in love with another man. Even though most of them knew that they had a very, very slim chance of having anything with Brenda that resembled what she had with Jax, they all were so enchanted with her that they were willing to take the chance, that is until she screamed out Jax’s name in the middle of what should have been just between them, and made it perfectly clear that her heart was already taken.
What Brenda didn’t know was that Jax had very similar experiences. He would only allow his fingers to penetrate the women he was with , so he had absolutely zero chance of getting them pregnant and while he allowed some of them to satisfy his desires a la Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky, he was rarely able to. He usually ended up going into the nearest bathroom and satisfying himself while thinking about his one true love, Brenda. On the few occasions when he did attempt to consummate a relationship, he always called out Brenda’s name before he entered the women who, though usually very tempted, ran off before initiating contact. Causing Jax to return to the bathroom and fantasize about his true love.

With the knowledge that they would break up soon anyway, Brenda called Anthony and summoned him over at once. Like all the others, he obeyed her perfectly, as Jax’s girlfriends did in regards to him. The truth was that most of their dates were attracted to them despite and because of their bond. It was that sparkly glow that lit up both Jax & Brenda when they were in a room together that attracted the opposite sex to each of them. Their dates always wanted to one day be able to see that look in his or her eyes, when he/she looked at them. It was that glimmer of hope that devoted interested parties to them, even though it was clear to see that their hearts belonged together, even if they couldn’t tell, everyone else could. But both of their magnetizing irresistableness made perspective dates want to devote themselves to them in an effort to win their hearts.

As Brenda waited for Anthony arrive and help her retrieve her message or at least send another voiding that one, she sat down to read the e-mail she so carelessly clicked over the internet the night before.

Tears poured down her face as she read the letter to herself.

Jax,
You’ve only been gone a few days and already I miss you like crazy. I hate being away from you for extended periods of time and I hate not being able to tell you how I feel about you, but I don’t want to burden you. So here I am writing, or should I say typing? I guess it doesn’t really matter since this will never in a million years get to you.

Brenda breaks from reading the letter for a moment to say to her self, “if only that were true”.

So where was I? Oh yes, this letter, like all the others I write when I can’t sleep or miss you too much to do anything but sit and cry and wish you were here, will never get to you because I need to tell you how I feel. Only I can’t risk losing you in my life so I can only pretend you’re here and share my inner most thoughts with you in a letter, I’ll never give you.
I tried to sleep tonight, I tried for a couple of hours but all I could do was lie there and think of you. Like most of my other sleepless nights I laid there imagining you were next to me. At first it was innocent. You lying there, talking to me, but as always my mind wandered further, & further away. I envisioned you reaching over and tickling me, at first playful but then more. I closed my eyes tightly and I could almost feel you running your hands along my body, awakening all the feelings I’ve tried so hard to push away. I closed my eyes tighter and could feel your lips brushing against mine. At first the sensation was barely there, but then it got stronger and stronger, I felt you connecting your mouth with mine and initiating a dance, salsa style and I’m not talking about the dip here. The single kiss turned into many more, until I could feel your loving lips burning my body with desire as you kissed every part of my body, sometime lingering, sometime regressing, but making sure not to miss a single spot. I felt your desire against me. I imagined removing your clothing as you removed mine, and joining you in a heaven that was all our own. I tried to imagine moving my lips among your perfect body but I couldn’t. Even in my fantasies I know that I don’t deserve to have you love me as completely as I know you can, and have. I imagined us making love over & over again. Sweet and delicious as it always is, I guess that should be was.
I tried to let sweet thoughts and fantasies of you carry me off to a wonderful dream world where we’re still man & wife & you still desire me, but my mind wouldn’t allow me to. So I came to your lap top, the only connection I have to you. I was going to write you an actual e-mail but I sent too many that day, so I decided to get my feelings out. After all that is what Gail told me I needed to do after my breakdown, stop holding every thing in.
I wish you were here with me. Talking, laughing, joking, teasing. I miss you. I hate these business trips of yours. The only thing I like about them is when you come back. That little bit of time when we see each other for the first time in a long time and we both let our guards down. I get so lost in those long hugs, I wonder if you do too. Hopefully you will get back late and rent a movie. We never do seem to make it through the entire movie, do we? I love sitting there next to you, taking in your every move as you watch the movie. I never remember what we watched. The best part of the whole night is when we fall asleep in each other’s arms. I love waking up the next morning with your arms around me. But then your defenses go back up, causing mine to as well and we lose that physical contact. I sometime wonder if not touching is as hard for you as it is for me.
The absolute worst days are the ones when we should be celebrating. Our wedding anniversaries, and our other “Anniversaries” like the first time you said you love me, and the first time I knew I loved you. I wonder if they’re as painful for you as they are for me. I wish we could spend more then a few minutes together on those days but I feel you distancing yourself from me the most on those days. You avoid all eye contact with me and you won’t touch me, not even my arm. I wish you could ease my pain on those days but I know it’s my fault that we’re not together celebrating them. I wonder if you feel as lonely as I do on those days. You must know that those days are difficult for me because you always give me time alone (which I usually spend crying until I have no tears left), then you call me late at night and talk me to sleep. Your phone calls are the only thing that gets me through those days.
I feel considerably better now so I’ll try to go back to bed. I wish you would come with me, but I know that’s not possible, so I’ll wrap myself up in one of the shirts you left here & try to sleep. I miss you Jax and I love you. I wish I could tell you how much.
Love
Brenda

Tears continue falling down Brenda’s face as she closes the file and nervously waits for Anthony to come and hopefully save her from a huge embarrassment.

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Will Anthony be able to help Brenda? Will Jax read the e-mail before Brenda stops him? Does Jax’s cousin have a secret agenda? To find out you will have to wait for the next chapter.

Chapter 3

The Click of a Mouse - chapter three

At first Anthony’s arrival went unnoticed by Brenda (she had door open so she wouldn’t have to get up and answer it). It wasn’t until he called out her name that she realized she wasn’t alone. All it took was one look for Anthony to know that something was terribly wrong with Brenda. Anyone could have seen what he did. Brenda moved away from the lap top as Anthony moved closer. A closer view revealed to him that Brenda hadn’t just been crying, she was still crying. Her eyes were puffy and swollen . From the look of her, she must had been crying for quite some time.
As anyone would do for someone they cared about, Anthony tried to embrace Brenda in a comforting hug but Brenda pulled away before he got a chance. He tried to kiss her, but that too was rejected by her. Brenda didn’t waste time with hello’s or pleasantries. She immediately pointed to the chair in front of the lap top indicating that Anthony should sit there.
Once Anthony was seated and ready to begin whatever it was Brenda needed him to do, Brenda stood beside him and moved the mouse, clicking and moving until she had the list of mail she recently sent visible. She didn’t bother to look at Anthony as she pointed to the one she sent to Jax.

B: “That one, I need to unsend it or at least send another one to that address but the stupid computer won’t let me get through.”
A: “I should have known, it’s to Jax.”

Brenda didn’t speak at first she just nodded her head yes.

B: “So will you help me?”
A: “Ill do everything I can”

So Anthony began working on the computer. First he tried to send Jax an e-mail just to confirm what Brenda told him, that it wouldn’t go through. His next attempt was to try and e-mail someone else who used the same internet server as Jax did. That confirmed what he didn’t want to know, that it wasn’t the server, for some strange reason it was just Jax she couldn’t get through too.
Anthony then went on to do a whole bunch of other things that Brenda didn’t understand, but hoped would work. As Anthony worked on the computer, Brenda sat on the couch shaking. Anthony glanced over to her every once in awhile to make sure she was okay, but she didn’t look at him, not even once, only Jax was on her mind. Anthony noticed that Brenda was wearing a shirt that was way too big for her, and he quickly deducted that it was Jax’s. Why did that not surprise him?, he wondered. Brenda appeared to attempt to pull the shirt tighter around her, as if trying to make the shirt hug her. That’s when Anthony knew it had to be Jax’s. There was no doubt about it, she was wishing that the shirt was Jax, hugging her.
Despite this knowledge, Anthony continued doing everything he could to retrieve Brenda’s letter. After hours of trying, there was nothing left for Anthony to try. He shut down the lap top and went over to Brenda who, with the realization that Anthony wasn’t making progress, now looked almost catatonic. It took a few minutes for him to pull her out of her dazed look and return her to reality. Once he did, he tried to explain to Brenda what happened.

A: “I tried everything and nothing worked, there’s nothing more I can do. How long ago did you send it anyway?”
B: “About two in the morning”
A: “If you would have called me sooner I might have been able to help but it’s too late now. Once the letter has been sent and delivered there’s no way for me to get it back.”

Tears still flow down Brenda’s face as she finally looks at Anthony.

B: “So there’s nothing you can do?”
A: “I’m sorry Brenda, there’s nothing anyone can do”

Anthony doesn’t attempt to stay or ask Brenda when he will see her again. He knows that she probably won’t answer anyway. He does try and hug and kiss her one more time, but once again she backs away. He mutters one more, “I’m sorry” and leaves, knowing that any chance he could possibly have with Brenda no longer exists, not even in his hopes. After seeing her in this state over Jax, he realizes that he can never have even a piece of her heart because unlike he previously thought, not even a small piece of her heart was left for anyone but Jax.

Once Anthony is gone, Brenda washes her face in the bathroom. She tries to pull herself together then dial Jax again, but she still doesn’t get an answer. After several more failed attempts she calls Ned to see if he’s in yet. She finally catches him at his office. Brenda doesn’t bother with pleasantries with Ned either, she stays focused, very focused on the matter at hand, getting that e-mail back.

N: “Hello. Ashton here”
B: “Where have you been? I’ve been calling you all morning?”
N: “I had to sleep some time since I was up most of the night helping you”
B: “Did you get my messages?”
N: “Yes, I was about to get back to you on that when you called”
B: “Can you help me?”
N: “I called the company a few minutes ago and it seems that they misunderstood what I was asking for last night.”
B: “What do you mean?”
N: “You know I called them to ask them if they could retrieve your message”
B: “right”
N: “They misunderstood my request. They thought I was Jax, actually they didn’t realize the account belonged to Jax since I just gave his internet address”
B: “I don’t understand”
N: “It’s simple really. They thought I wanted them to stop you from e-mailing me, only they thought Jax’s account was mine. So they blocked your e-mails from coming through.”
B: “Can they do that?”
N: “It’s one of the main services they perform. If a user doesn’t want to be contacted by someone, they can give them the other person’s e-mail address and get their messages blocked.”
B: “So they unblocked me, right?”
N: “It’s not that simple. The lady made a mistake last night and now they can’t correct it until Jax tells them to”
B: “What? That’s not possible, Jax can’t know. Why can’t they just unblock it since you’re the one they blocked it for?”
N: “There’s two problems. One is that they don’t believe I’m the one who called them last night, now they think I’m you and Jax really doesn’t want you to e-mail him. They want me to log on and come to their sight on Jax’s account, that’s the only way they will undo it”
B: “Why?”
N: “because they want to make sure I’m him. If I log on with his user name, I have to know his password, which I don’t. Without the password there’s nothing I can do.”
B:: “What’s the other problem?”
N: “Their computers are down right now because of some wide spread system error, so even if I could figure out his password, there’s nothing they can do about it, until they fix the problem.”
B: “When will that be?”
N: “They said it could be a few hours or a few days, they don’t know.”
B: “If their system’s down does that mean no one can sign on, so Jax can’t read his mail?”
N: “I asked them that very thing and they said their users can still get on and access their e-mail but that’s about the only thing they can do.”
B: “And that’s the one thing that can destroy everything”
N: “What do you mean”
B: “Forget it. Thank you Ned.”
N: “Brenda will you be okay?”
B: “Yes, as okay as I can be”
N: “I’ll stop by and see you later.”
B: “Bye Ned”
N: “Bye”

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Unlike Brenda who was a nervous wreak, Jax was too busy to think about anything else except for his work, that is besides the few times his mind drifted to thoughts of Brenda. But the majority of his thoughts were on the deal he was working on.
After a very long day of working and a quick dinner, Jax decided to go to his lap top & let his cousin Andrew know that he could meet him for dinner. As soon as Jax signed on & got his mail to appear on the screen, he noticed that there was one from Brenda. As was his usual routine, he went to click on Brenda’s first, but then he noticed a different e-mail. One from a name he didn’t recognize. entitled, “hey cousin, I miss you”. So Jax moved the mouse down a bit and clicked on the unknown e-mail.
Jax’s face lit up as he read the e-mail, it was from one of his favorite cousins, Rene. Actually her name was Renee but they called her Rene which she preferred over her old nick name, Nae-Nae. Jax couldn’t remember the last time he saw Rene, or even spoke to her, he couldn’t have been more then a teenager when he last saw her. Before he met Brenda he used to call her all the time and tell her every thing that was going on in his life, but then he began confiding in Brenda, and stopped the phone calls and slowed down the e-mails. The e-mails that he wrote her with her old e-mail address. Once Brenda separated from him, he continued writing Rene but not as often, and not about much besides Brenda. He hadn’t attempted to e-mail her in months, so her message came as a big surprise to him. She wanted to fly to Port Charles and spend some time with him, but she only wanted that if Jax couldn’t fly over to visit her. She almost demanded that they see eachother, or she would be forced to never talk or write to him again. So Jax got an idea, why didn’t he invite her to come to PC the same time his cousin Andrew would be there.
Jax wrote Rene a quick e-mail saying that he missed her too, & asking her why she didn’t just call him if she wanted to get in touch with him so badly. He said that he didn’t appreciate her threats, but despite them he would like her to come to Port Charles when Andrew would be there that way they could all get caught up. With the click of the mouse he sent it off to Rene.
He was about to click on Brenda’s mail when he remembered the reason he went online in the first place, to let Andrew know he was free to have dinner with him the night he would be in town. So Jax put off the one e-mail he wanted to read so that he could contact his cousin. He let Andrew know that Rene might be in town as well that day and he hoped he didn’t mind (which he knew he wouldn’t since his only reason for wanting to have dinner alone with Jax was because he didn’t want Jax to invite Brenda along).
What Jax didn’t know was that Andrew asked Rene to e-mail Jax with the request to see him, and knowing Jax as well as he does, he knew that Jax would invite Rene to show up the same time he was there. It was all part of his plan, as was Rene’s answer to Jax’s e-mail. Andrew had a definite goal in mind and he planned to achieve it. What Andrew didn’t know was that Rene also had a goal in mind & it wasn’t the same as his, in fact it was the complete opposite, but he had no way of knowing that.
Jax requested that Andrew let him know if he was okay with Rene being there and reminded him to make sure he showed up this time (like Jerry, Andrew also was known to show up when least expected, and not show up when expected). Jax clicked Andrews letter away over the internet & clicked on Brenda’s e-mail.
Right as Jax smiled and was about to read what Brenda wrote him, he got one of those very annoying messages saying that he had been disconnected and was no longer on line. In that instant, Brenda’s e-mail disappeared off the screen, & Jax’s phone rang obnoxiously. Jax finally picked up the receiver, with a very angry tone to his voice he asked, “What do you want?” He soon discovered that it was a telemarketer calling to ask him if he wanted to subscribe to the local newspaper. Jax quickly ended the call and tried to reconnect with his account, but he was unsuccessful, he tried again, and again, until finally he decided that he would rather call Brenda then read what she wrote anyway, but he would be sure to go to his old mail the next time he went online and mark Brenda’s e-mail as new mail as well as save it on one of his “Brenda disks”. But for now, he would rather hear her voice coming into his ear.
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Brenda had already changed into her night clothing, her creme pajamas that Jax loved so much, when she sat down to call Jax. She wanted to be able to stop wondering and know if he read her mail yet. She cursed the fact that he refused to use AOL like she did, if he had his account on AOL not only could she have unsent her mistake before he had a chance to read it, but she could have checked the status of it and seen if he had read it yet, but now she had to sit around and wonder her fate as the only relationship that truly mattered to her was in severe jeopardy because of one stupid click of the mouse.
Before Brenda could call Jax she was startled by the sound of her phone ringing. She answered it sounding annoyed, annoyed that someone prevented her from hearing Jax’s voice.

B: “Hello”

Jax immediately knew something was wrong with Brenda. He also knew that she would try and down play it or hide it all together. She’d done that ever since he called her during one of his business trips to discover that she was in a horrible mood (which he didn’t realize was simply because she missed him more then she was willing to let on, even to herself at the time). He rushed home right away and blew an enormous deal, which Brenda didn’t find out about until Jerry threw it in her face during one of their many arguments.

J: “Is this a bad time? If it is I can call back later?”

Jax relaxes some when he hears Brenda release what sounds like a sigh of relief.

B: “Jax! You don’t need to do that, I was just having some problems with the computer”
J: “Which, computer? It’s not my lap top is it because I just brought that one for repairs a few weeks ago”
B: “It is the lap top but there’s nothing wrong with it, it’s me. I keep hitting the wrong buttons, in fact”

Before Brenda can get out that she needs to ask Jax something he interrupts with his own computer troubles.

J: “I know what you mean. I was online and got knocked off by someone who wanted me to buy the local paper, now I can’t get back on”
B: “If you need me to go online & do something for you, I can”
J: “Thanks but that won’t be necessary. I was just checking e-mails”
B: “Oh, you were”

Brenda’s heart immediately speeds up as she wonders if he read hers yet.

J: “As a matter of fact I just opened yours when I got knocked off. I hope I didn’t lose it.”

The thought of Jax losing the e-mail was exactly what Brenda wanted. She realized that this was the perfect opportunity to get him not to read her mail while not alerting him to the fact that she didn’t want him to read what she wrote.

B: “At least you didn’t lose anything important, right?”

Jax wanted to say that her e-mails were the most important ones to him, but he didn’t know how she would take it and most importantly he didn’t know if he would be able to ever trust enough to let her know what he really meant by that. Jax wasn’t willing to let the e-mail be lost forever so he asked Brenda a question about it.

J: “I’ll determine that myself. So what did you write?”

Brenda was knocked off balance by Jax’s question, she never in a million years expected him to ask that, then again she never in a million years expected to send it to him in the first place.

B: “What did I write?”
J: “Yeah, you must remember.”

Brenda knew that she couldn’t tell him what she really wrote, so she only told him a very small part of it.

B: “I said I miss you”
J: “Anything else?”
B: “No, that’s the only important part”
J: “Well I miss you too. I should be home tomorrow night. Are you busy?”

Once Brenda knew that Jax believed her, she relaxed completely and forgot all about the possibility that Jax could still retrieve her e-mail and read it.

B: “I am now”
J: “Why’s that?”
B: “Because you’re coming over to the cottage the first thing after you land”
J: “Oh I am, am I?”
B: “Yes”

Jax and Brenda stayed on the phone for over an hour, talking and laughing. the only reason they stopped talking was because Jax could hear that Brenda fell asleep while still on the other end. Jax smiled, happy that he could still help her fall to sleep & whispered, “Goodnight my Angel, sweet dreams.” He couldn’t bare to hang up on her & leave the annoying sound of the dial tone in her ear, so he left his line open all night in case she woke up & needed to talk to him. He knew that the sound of her voice in the phone would wake him even from the deepest sleep. A small part of him hoped that she would wake up, but she didn’t. She had her first peaceful night of sleep since Jax left for his latest business trip.
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While Brenda slept soundly, Ned couldn’t shake the memory of the conversation they had earlier that day when he went to visit her. Ned went over to check on her like he said he would. He found Brenda in a panic, trying to figure out something that would help her get rid of the mail she sent Jax. She even tried to guess his password so she could delete the mail herself but she was unsuccessful, she had no idea that his password should have been easy to figure out, if only she would have thought the way she thinks, and not tried to guess how Jax thinks. She did have one thing right though, his password was an abbreviation but she could never guess what the password was especially since he switched servers after they were already separated. All she needed was six letters: ILYBMA, but without the knowledge of what he was thinking there was no way she could guess that his pass word was short for a something he used to say to her all the time when they were married, I Love You Brenda My Angel.
Brenda’s lack of ability to break the code and her wandering thoughts about if Jax read her letter yet, and what he would do if he had; Which she determined was get away from her as fast as he could, were driving Brenda into a panic and the worst mood Ned ever saw her in. Ned tried to cheer her up but nothing would work. Finally he asked her what she wrote in the letter that could possibly have her so worried. What could she have written that Jax didn’t know? The conversation was crystal clear to him even hours later.

B: “I said some things I never should have, that I had no right to say”
N: “Is this about his business?”
B: “No”
N: “Then what’s it about?”
B: “How I feel about him”
N: “That you still love him?”
B: “What?”
N: “That’s it isn’t it”
B: “How could you”
N: “I would have to be blind not to see it Brenda. Your feelings for him are very transparent”
B: “You think you know everything don’t you?”
N: “I don’t know why you’re in such a panic over this. You told him how you feel, what’s the big deal. It’s not like he doesn’t know”
B: “The big deal is that I could chase him away forever”
N: “That’s the best thing that could happen to you”

Ned knew he made a HUGE mistake when he said that. Brenda’s eyes felt with anger and she shot him some looks that were meant to kill. But Ned stood his ground.

B: “How can you stand there and say that to me”
N: “If you chase him away, he’ll leave Port Charles and get out of all of our lives, I can’t think of anything better then that”
B: “You can’t be serious, you can’t really think that I would benefit from Jax leaving”
N: “Of course you would. He’s no good for you Brenda.”

Ned knew he made an even bigger mistake with those words as soon as tears started pouring down Brenda’s face and her voice gave the impression that her heart had just been broken into a million pieces.

B: “How can you say that? You know what he’s done for me. What he’s been through for me and with me.”
N: “He was just trying to win the prize which is you, once he gets you, he won’t want you anymore.”
B: “You must be delusional Ned. I don’t understand how you can say that to me. YOU the person who’s supposed to be like a brother to me. Are you deliberately trying to hurt me?”
N: “No but”

Ned wanted desperately to take back what he said and wipe the sadness from Brenda’s face, but he couldn’t, Brenda wouldn’t let him. He spoke his mind and Brenda wasn’t going to let him take it back, not until she said what was on her own mind and in her heart.

B: “I’m the one who hurt him, and he made me feel better.”

Brenda tries to fight the tears as she continues but her resistance isn’t strong enough to stop the river of tears waiting to flow out of her eyes as if they were water falls. She doesn’t try and wipe away her tears once they flow, she lets Ned, no, makes Ned see how hurt she is by his accusation that Jax just thought of her as some prize to be won.

B: “Do you even realize that Ned? I broke his heart, and he put mine back together. He stood by me through everything Ned. He was the only one willing to stay by me through the worst times of my life.”
N: “I”

Ned tried to interrupt and point out that he has always been willing to come when Brenda asked for help. but Brenda makes him put it off while she continues.

B: “He wasn’t trying to win me NED, I wasn’t some prize to him. If that’s all I was, he could have had me a long time ago. Even you said that my love for him is obvious. So can’t he see it Ned? Couldn’t he of had his prize a long time ago if that’s all I was to him?”

Ned’s mind was still stuck on what Brenda said about Jax being the only one willing to stick by her, he whole heatedly disagreed. Though thinking back on it now, he understood what she meant.

N: “He’s not the only one who stuck by you. I was there, all you had to do was call and you know I would have come”
B: “What about the times when I couldn’t call, when I couldn’t ask for help NED. What about those times when I was stuck in the mental ward? I saw you what, maybe two times. Do you know where Jax was? DO YOU?”

Ned shook his head no although he knew that Jax was by her side most of the time.

B: “I’ll tell you where he was NED. He was right there in the hospital with me, making sure I had every thing I needed and wanted. The only time he left was to do something for me or ask the doctors how I was. He didn’t go home Ned. Do you know that? Not even for one night, he stayed there next to my bed every night. He slept in that hard chair by my bed, or he fell asleep sitting up on my bed, still holding my hand. He was comforting me NED. A few months earlier I threw away every thing I had with him, but he didn’t care NED because I needed him. I needed him Ned and that’s all that mattered to him. When the rest of you were going on with your lives, maybe with an occasional thought about if I would be okay or how sorry you felt for me, Jax was there with me. Because I needed him. I needed Jax.
I couldn’t tell him but he knew and he put his life on hold so he could make mine better. He didn’t just stop by for a few minutes every once in a while to see how I was. He knew how I was because he was there with me, even when I was so gone that I couldn’t recognize anyone, he didn’t care because he knew that what I needed was to have him by my side.”
N: “If you would have just told me, I would have”
B: “What Ned? What would you have done? Would you have sat there and watched as I stared into space and couldn’t even feed myself? My sister couldn’t even do that. She flew here just to see me Ned, but you know what? She couldn’t face me. She would come in for a minute or two then leave, but not Jax. He was there through it all. He told me that it broke his heart to see me like that but that didn’t scare him away like it would have sent you away. He sat there while his heart broke and did everything he could to make me smile, to make me happy. I’m not some prize that he’s trying to win Ned, if he wants me he can have me. Do you even understand how much he has done to make me happy at his own expense? DO YOU? He should hate me, he should have walked away as soon as the charges were dropped against him and let me stay in pain, but he didn’t. Because I needed him. Do you realize that he risked his life to save me from Lilly’s father? You probably don’t. But he did. Do you realize that if it wasn’t for Jax I would still be in that mental hospital”

Ned shakes his head no.

N: ”That’s not true”
B: “That is true NED. I never would have gotten out of there if it wasn’t for Jax. He believed in me when I couldn’t believe in myself. He stayed there until I slowly regained my sanity. If he gets that letter and leaves my life, I don’t think I will be able to cope with it, that’s the one thing that could send me back to that mental ward. I can’t lose him Ned, I can’t. I could lose anyone else but not him I have to find a way to stop him from reading it. I have to”.

After Brenda finished talking , Ned realized that she used up all of her strength telling him what he didn’t know about Jax. She didn’t look at Ned again. She hid her head in a pillow on the couch and shook as she cried even harder then before. This time her cries weren’t silent, loud sobs escaped her mouth as she avoided all contact with Ned. Ned’s attempt to apologize was useless since the only reaction he was able to get out of her was when he touched her and she moved her arm as if he was trying to inject poison into her. Ned said he was sorry and left, but Brenda never even looked at him. He tried to call and apologize but Brenda either left her machine on or hung up when she heard his voice, neither of which helped ease his guilt. So as Brenda slept peacefully with Jax sleeping soundly on the other end of the phone, Ned laid awake full of guilt for not being there for Brenda when she truly needed him and not realizing that Brenda could be more then a prize that Jax was trying to win.

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Will Jax retrieve and read the e-mail? How will J&B spend his “home coming”? What’s up with this cousin Andrew of Jax’s? To find out you will have to read the next chapter & give me feedback.