Swingin' With Raymond

One of the less-well-known Chumbawamba albums, this LP was divided into two parts--the 'love it!' first half (the first six tracks) and the 'hate it!' last half (the last seven tracks). The last track, Last Taxi Ride, was recorded during the love it sessions, but not included on the release.

This Girl

This girl, she didn't turn out quite the way she was supposed to do
This girl, she got bored of all the things they brought her up to say
She never meant them anyway
This girl, she got caught out on the multi-storey car park
Throwing goodbye notes wrapped up in bricks
When they put her in the car she said, 'Jesus made me do it'
But all the priests in all the world couldn't save this girl
This girl, content with all the bloody noses, scabby knees
You get from fighting wars like these,
Running past the tidy houses pulling faces
This material world couldn't tempt this girl
(Chorus)
Now she entertains the world and all its mates
But she doesn't fit in
And everybody thinks this girl is great
But she's lacing all the party drinks with venom from a poison pen
This girl, she made a habit of habitually lying
Does everybody's head in
She knows what happens when the next stop that you see
It's not the one that everyone expected it to be
This girl, happy families 'round the supermarket check-out
She loves to be the odd one out
The party girl who stayed upstairs
Playing musical chairs
La-la, la-la-la
She doesn't care this girl.
(Repeat chorus)
This girl, she didn't turn out quite the way she was supposed to do

Never Let Go

These red azaleas
Never grew so tall
This well of loneliness
Could rise and drown us all
(Chorus)
There is no right or wrong
Things fall as they do
Pulled by the sun and the moon
Forever comes too soon
People come people go
But still I'll never let go
Ideas come ideas go
Still I'll never let go
Still I'll never let go
I've fallen for the girl
Been mad about the boy
When you've kissed an angel
There's just no choice
(Repeat chorus)
Lying with the squares
On the kitchen floor
Watch the clock's pointing fingers
It's seen it all before
(Repeat chorus)

Just Look At Me Now

Don't tell me lies
I want it all
(Repeat)
I don't need fingerprints
So button up your coat
Before you catch your death of cold
Throw away your books
They're building windmills
Three miles up
Out on the moors
There's an empire waiting
(Chorus)
Look at me now
I can take on the world and win
Look at me now
Towny go home
Whispers in the Tower of Babel
But I have all I need
I have shoes with sharpened soles
And every simple joy
We make it all so complicated
When all you need to know
Is putting the meat
Around your bones
(Repeat chorus)
Just look at me now
Both feet on the ground
My sights are fixed on the horizon
(Repeat)

Not The Girl I Used To Be

(Chorus)
Wondering
Have I given up dreaming?
Come down from the ceiling
I won't do that again
Thinking
My misspent history
Mistakes to teach me
I won't do that again
Dreams I kept as a child
Kept me quiet and hypnotized
Cooked away my valentines
Served myself up every night
Couldn't see me for the trees
And all that hallmark poetry
I'm not the girl I used to be
I'm not the girl I used to be
(Repeat chorus)
Trying to break the family ties
Chocolate hearts and tacky lies
Heard a thousand crappy lines
And I believed them every time
So I beg to disagree
Love's not taking all of me
I'm not the girl I used to be
I'm not the girl I used to be
(Repeat chorus)
I'm not the girl I used to be
(Repeat)

The Morning After (The Night Before)

Unholy Sunday a winter's day
Mine is the kingdom
Church bells ring a million miles away
Forever and ever
Nowhere to go, nothing to do
But stay here warm in bed with you
(Chorus)
The morning after the night before
Sunday after Saturday, the morning after
Sunday after Saturday, the morning after
Sunday after the night before
Ice on the windows, let's melt it away
It's a hell of a winter
So much time to waste, so much to say
Peppered with laughter
Nowhere to go, nothing to do
But move just a little bit closer to you
The morning after the night before
(Repeat chorus)
Plasticine people we could be
Do what you want to
Squeezing together for now or forever
Forever or never
Nowhere to go, nothing to do
But roll up into a ball with you
(Repeat chorus)

Love Can Knock You Over

Here's the devil in disguise
Hits me right between the eyes
Like a thief out of the night
Someone taught him how to fight
(Chorus)
Love can knock you over
Love can knock you over
Tongue-tied and crucified
Cross my heart and hope to die
But I'll get up again
And I'll fall down again
And I'll get fooled again
(Repeat chorus)
Beaten by the sucker punch
And I don't care about getting' up
You can count me out this time
And I won't mind
So used to useless metaphors
Lost the battle, won the war
Words to fight another day
Pass away
(Repeat chorus)

All Mixed Up

Sitting on the shelf when someone called my number
With a template in one hand, scissors in the other
'What lump of clay is this?' Said the king maker to me
Dull, gray matter, perfect for his alchemy
The future flesh and blood on the bones of the big lie
A no-wit who's face fits and never wonders why
I met my Mephistophelles, the papers sealed in blood
Like I got a transfer deal the lad done good
(Chorus)
Good King Danbert at the helm
His face on every coin of the realm
And every time we sing, it's three cheers for the king
Hey, hey, hey
Sirhan, Sirhan, where have you gone?
All mixed up
We take a fool for a king
All mixed up
Mistake a fool for a king
(Repeat)
The washing powder advert
That everybody hates
But all the research shows that's how brand names are made
Squeaky clean, no skeletons
In other words I've never lived
Makes me highly-qualified
To decide what gives
Rough-shod, riding rail-road
Over all the awkward questions
Queen Victoria of Grantham
To give me her blessing
It's written all over me
I'm touched by the hand
I am the something very rotten
In the state of little England
(Repeat chorus)
All mixed up
(Repeat)

This Dress Kills

I'm Judas Judy, panicking, got everything and nothing
Happy birthday mister president I'm here to call your bluff
From the top of the world I'm gonna jump, jump, jump
I'm so perfectly imperfect and I did it for your love
I'm as small as Thumbelina, sugar fairy on the cake
Because the thinnest of excuses leave the bitterest taste
Brittle-boned, Barbie-cued, take a piece of my heart
When you know you haven't got it, does it make you feel good
This dress is killing me
Frockanoia
(Repeat)
I won and then I lost and then I won and then I lost
And now I know how much a pound of flesh can cost
And the question isn't if, but a definite when
Do I throw my achy heart into the gutter again
The party isn't over 'til the thin lady sings
Critics dressed as waiters waiting in the wings
There they'll gather like vultures to pick at the bones
I won and then I lost and I got nothing at all
This dress is killing me
Frockanoia
(Repeat)

Salome (Let's Twist Again)

Part punk, part god almighty
Part fuck you, part mister x-ray eyes
I didn't choose to be
Shouting for a living, it happened
Something snapped and I don't know why
Too many slaps? Too many priests?
Fumbled sex in parks?
Or just a part of the me, me, me generation
The Thatcher youth
Coming home to roost
If the old school cap fits, wear it
But I'll take my cake and share it
Burning down a bonfire made of teachers
Pay your VAT bills on the cinders
Just you and little Molly Flinders
Doing the twist at all the dances
Don't look to me for answers
(Chorus)
Let's twist again, hear them sing
Let's twist again, see them sing
Let's twist again
Let's twist again, hear them sing
Let's twist again, see them sing
Let's twist again
Bring on the dancing girls
Part sussed, part amateur
Part love you, part mister bleeding heart
I singalonga, jump uppa-downa,
Watch this space
I've got lungs full of this stuff
Two sides together in the commons bar
Just who the fuck do they think they are
I am not a pop star
I am a part of the class war
Every revolutionary
Is motivated by love
I see the newsreels, two hundred bodies
In a shallow grave in Timor
What am I supposed to do?
Forget it? Pretend it never happened?
Whilst politicians circle-jerk 'round
Legal jargon totem poles
(Repeat chorus)
You tell me
Where does entertainment end
And responsibility begin
Oh Salome waits
Oh Salome waits
Oh Salome waits
She says 'bring me all the heads
of all the heads of state
(Repeat)
(Repeat chorus)

Oxymoron

Shiny button-down clown suit
Oxymoron
(Repeat)
Fucked up the simplest of chores
Mister constant consternation
And his declaration of war
Makes a fist out of demands
With his plasticene hands
Matey makes a big, big deal
And matey makes a big big meal
Boasts of a conscience so big
It means his uniform won't fit
Cooking books and punching drunks
Working for the real crooks
The good cop
Oxymoron
(Repeat)
I don't believe in the good cop
I don't believe in the good cop
I don't believe
At the ticket inspector's party
Prison guards eye store detectives
All good fighters of crime
Same repeated chat-up line
Are you well tooled up
Come and have a go if you think
You're hard enough
Watch them tighten their straps
Yes sir I switched on the taps
Heads to crack, eyes to black
Bureaucrats will cover your tracks
Here's how your dictatorships begin
Fools obey without thinking
The good cop
Oxymoron
(Repeat)
I don't believe in the good cop
I don't believe in the good cop
I don't believe
(Repeat)

Waiting, Shouting

Just take a ticket
It takes you nowhere
They saw us coming
It's them and us here
Just keep your voice down
And light another
I am a patient girl
I wait, I wait, I wait
It's not your money
Don't call me stupid
Not big, not clever
Mean can mean awkward
It's Wigan Pier here
I'm not for jumping
See candid camera
Sees next to nothing
(Chorus)
You keep me waiting
I keep on shouting
You keep me waiting
I keep on shouting
You keep me waiting
I keep on shouting
You keep me waiting
My letterbox knows
Bangers and bad news
Good morning campers
Sees queues and queues and queues
They spell my name wrong
It's not for art's sake
And every truth told
Black mark on black mark
You love to chew on
This bread and butter
You crunch your numbers
And push your papers
Pile-up on pile-up
Malicious bad turns
I'll light another
Slow fuses, slow burn
(Repeat chorus)

Hey! You! Outside, Now!

One year later
This queue never moved
I've got well dressed slugs
Crawling over my shoes
And all these bouncers
Pushing me around
Well I'll huff and I'll puff
I'll blow your house down
In these hard times
No money for the arts
No money for a bonus
And my car won't start
The taxman cometh
And the landlord too
Now something better change
I've got things to do
(Chorus)
Scratched record carries on forever
On forever, on forever
Last waltz carries on forever
On forever, on forever
Prize fighter carries on forever
On forever, on forever
Too much bowing
To the sacred cow
Hey! You! Outside now!
Two years later
And the tap still drips
This pain in my back
Means I still can't sleep
They're ripping up the longsides
For plastic seats
We're ripping off the gas
Just to make ends meet
Half the population
Living off crime
I'm talking 'bout the fuckers
On question time
Pop fops on horse
Haven't got a clue
Now something better change
I've got things to do
(Repeat chorus)
Hey! You! Outside now!
(Repeat)
On forever, on forever
(Repeat)
Three years later
And I'm still in this queue
Now something better change
I've got things to do
too much bowing
To the sacred cow
Hey! You! Outside now!
(Repeat)

Ugh! Your Ugly Houses!

Ugh! Your ugly, your ugly, your ugly houses look so Ugh!
(repeat)

Last Taxi Ride

One last taxi ride before we die
'This is destiny, she cried
Ride so carelessly around the avenues
Watch the lights, the fairy lights
And all at once a thousand conversations
All at once we said all we want to say
One last taxi ride before we die
'This is destiny,' she cried
So sleep, dear friend, wake up and in the end
I must be silent now the city streets are paved in blood
Watch the world come in they don't know where we've been
Around the avenues a million miles
One last taxi ride before we die
'This is destiny,' she cried
And all at once a thousand conversations
All at once we said all we want to say
One last taxi ride before we die
This is destiny