The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words possible.
1. Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
2. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
3. I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.
4. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
5. A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
6. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
7. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
8. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.
9. In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
10. I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.
11. I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
12. I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
13. The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck the front end.
14. As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly approached in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was
unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
15. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
16. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
17. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
18. I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.
19. I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.
20. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
21. I saw a slow moving, sad faced gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car.
22. The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
23. I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
