I sit here today. I find myself, once again, weeping for the loss of innocent life due to the violence of man.
I'm hearing phrases in my head. They echo and enrage me before the person muttering them is finished speaking them. "It wasn't like that when I went to school." "There is so much violence today." "It's so easy to get guns these days." So on and so on and so on.
The sorrow is this isn't some isolated incident. It isn't part of some new trend either. It's reality, hard and painful. It's what has made America the country it is. Do you remember this is the country that built itself on the backs of other people? Do you remember this is the country that forced an entire nation of people to leave their home and gave them infected blankets for their journey, hoping to kill them on the way? Do you remember this is the country that lynched men for having sex with women of another race? Do you remember that this is the country that up until 30 years ago had segregated public places and schools? This is the country that tested the Atomic Bomb on it's own people and called them "low yield". This is the country that used that bomb in war. This is the country that goes to war over access to oil and allows it's companies to set up slave factories in thirld world nations.
I don't know where you all went to High School, but kids fought all the time at my school. I'll take you to some schools in South San Diego and in Los Angeles where kids worry about being killed every single day. These aren't all High Schools either, there are many elementary schools. These are just inner city kids (and mostly minority) of course, so they don't deserve the attention and outrage that affluent kids do. This is an every day reality to so many children in this country.
I guess my point of all this is why are we outraged now? I know it would be a horrible burden to weep every day for the crimes of the world, but I do. If these Trench Coat Mafia guys came out with a line of clothing, would you buy it? I don't think anyone would, based on principle alone. So why don't we make the same informed decisions in every purchase? Why do we buy clothes made in China? Why do we purchase things made in Honduras and Haiti? Why do we allow our government to do business with murderous people? My hands aren't clean. I'm a fucking perpetrator myself. The thing is, an event like today shows the absolute unfairness of the world. We expect the world to be safe in our country if it's a small city of mostly affluent white people. When the real world reaches into places we thought it couldn't, we get outraged. It confuses me and saddens me. I was outraged too. I think we should be outraged, but I believe our outrage is a long time coming.
I also would like to know the difference between this Trench Coat Mafia and NATO. These boys had been wronged, and to make the wrong doers pay, they had to take innocent life in the process. What about NATO bombing Yugoslavia and apartment buildings and fleeing refugees getting killed in the process? We tell this man Milosevic that he isn't allowed to kill his people anymore and if he doesn't stop, we will do it for him. What makes NATO different? The exact same rationalization and justification is used in both cases. What makes it okay in one instance and horrific in the other?
I'm also hearing that these kids that commited this crime, "must have been treated horribly" or "had really poor parents". There are many people who are treated horribly and cruely and do not react in this way. I don't feel sorry for them. They made their choices. They chose to take their misery out on other people. Perhaps we need to examine what made them do this, but that doesn't excuse that they ultimately made their own choices. I know so many people that have been hurt terribly throughout their lives, and they haven't killed the perpetrators, let alone innocent people. I'm a big fan of holding parents responsible for their parenting, but some kids are parented brilliantly and still can't cope with life.
I know the next thing we will be hearing is that these kids watched South Park and listened to Marilyn Manson. This is just indicative of the type of shifting the blame. Wake up America, your country is founded on violence. No matter how much money you use to try and isolate yourselves from the realities of the world, the world will come knocking.
What's the solution to all this? I don't fucking know. I think so many people are too busy trying to scapegoat it all they can't see the larger picture. How can you have a dialogue about solution when people refuse to see the problem? It makes me angry, sad, and wholeheartedly disillusioned. I feel helpless and angry. I'm so tired of hacks on television who have all the answers, but none of the right questions. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to direct my anger. I don't know how to fucking help the people I want to rescue. I want to rescue the world from Bill Clinton and Jiang Zemin. I want people to realise that our heroes aren't George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and Andrew Jackson, but people like Harriet Tubman, Albert Schweitzer and Gandhi.
What are the solutions, where do we start?
Sary
