Dennis McClain-Furmanski (dynasor@infi.net) wrote: :
: I'm gonna fix that if I have to do it one account at a time.
: Fuck the money changers, I'm going after the MIND CHANGERS.
: After claening out enough space, I'm building me a concrete and re-bar
: altar and I'm gonna PREACH MY ASS OFF. And a copy goes to every pink
: fuckhead's article that wanders through. The Word of Dobbs shall thus be
: carried like a LEECH upon the CHEEKS of the Normworms.
:
: * 2qwk! 1.26b3 * Two wrongs don't make a right, but I do.
:
AMEN brother.

Folks, if you see someone out there that inspires you, like Dynasor, Stang, whoever, don't just sit there, suck up their post and do nothing, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Anything at all, because if you don't react to that which you like, your experience of it becomes dulled and you are not allowing the Slack therefrom to enter your life. If you read a beautiful post, and do nothing, you are most likely to forget all about it. Yes folks, if you wanna GET Slack, you gotta GIVE Slack. Now I know y'all are gonna say "But I DID! I give Slack every day to my bitch twat girlfriend and my Mr Burns boss! And I didn't get SHIT ONE back!" WELL DUH! Don't give it to THEM! Give it to someone who entertains you. Give it to your Shordurpersav! Trust me, if it is real Slack and they are a Subgenius, they will GIT more than you Give! Or heck, don't fucking trust me! Try it your damn self! If you like Clavis, SEND HIM KEYS! If you think the church is loveywonderful, Become a minister dammit and stop jackin' off to nothing at all in an empty room with no windows. Go outside, not into the Con's world of flourescent lights, but to those billion other worlds each barking its own tune under the silly blue moon! Every Yetikin has about 6543876 new worlds to show you but you gotta show 'em yers first before they know you're not onea Them so...

Okay. If you send weird stuff, tapes, True Bulldada and especially MONEY to your fellow Subgenii, especially those who are REALLY COOL and NEED IT, you will NOT regret it. Because: 1) By sending stuff to them, you boost their confidence, they become a brighter light, and if you liked the way their light shone you are making your own world more pleasant, if you turn up the sparkly colourful lights the other ones get dimmer... 2) By giving stuff away freely into the void, you are indicating that you trust the Slack Plane. Not only will it therefore give you more gifts, but you will also notice the ones you already get more fully. 3) They just might send you stuff back. BOOM! But do _not_ expect stuff back or you will most likely be disappointed. Especially if you expect _foo_ in the mail at 23:47 AM EST by parcel post on a silver platter with tomatoes and cheese.

Be sure to send stuff they would appreciate, not stuff You would appreciate. But hell, if they don't appreciate whatever you do send, they're dick nose cheese anyway, so who cares.

BUT NOTE: If we do not hang together (with other Subs we like, fuck the Bobbies) we shall all hang seperately, whether literally killed, jailed, committed, burnt-out, suicided or turned into walking zombies like all those other victims of the Hamburger Machine out there.

So buy extravagant well-thought-out gifts for your friends and shordurpersavs and ignore pink acquaintances and get the MOST for your dollar and eat the FUCK out of that hamburger and kiss the PISS out of your friends and get the Starkest Possible Life for your Time. Cause I'm telling you, there's ONLY 3 YEARS LEFT!! REALLY!! And if 3 years seems like forever, YOU HAVE CANCER! YOU WILL DIE IN 6 MONTHS! AAAAH! CANCER!

Now you've GOT a dollar, what ARE you going to do with it? Let it rot in a bank so you can tell pinks you're "rich"? Get a $1 "posher" apartment with more room to roll over into further unconsciousness? "Save" it for a rainy day, when inflation and taxes will be higher, and it will be worth less? Or... TAKE A RISK! Send it sailing off into the unknown! Send it to your ShorDurperSav and WHO KNOWS what bulldada you will receive? Who knows what good luck it will randomly bring in other parts of your life? Maybe nothing! But you'll never know until you TAKE THAT CHANCE! What's a fucking dollar worth to you anyway? Even a cored-out heroin addict can afford to part with a fucking DOLLAR. The truth is it's _not_ the money. If anyone has not sent a dollar (or bulldada, which is easier) to their shordurpersav, it is for other reasons.

Now you may rationalize your reason with "who the heck does so-and-so think he's trying to kid?" or some such. Well, it's YOU they're trying to kid! It's YOU! They're trying to make your life more FUN! But they need your help! No one can walk up to you and hand you Slack, you've gotta GO GET IT! RIGHT NOW! There is no other time, there is No Time Like The Present! Seize the fucking day! If you can, seize the SECOND! Seize your LIFE! Seize your GENITALS! Seize your FOE, and SCREAM IN HIS FACE! Seize your wife, FUCK her all the way up to seventh Heaven (the REAL one) and down to the 666th Hell at the SAME TIME for a WEEK AND A HALF, WITHOUT STOPPING! Seize your WALLET, and INVEST IN SLACK! NOW! NOW! NOW!

Or we're leavin' without you, and you can live your life of quiet desperation all by your dang self. No one will pity you, except Oprah and everybody knows she is just faking it.

-Agsts Damocletian QPM 1