* Sunshiney's Tribute to Darkness *

I just love quotes...
Here are some of my all time favourites.

"We enter into life naked and howling, covered with blood.
The fun doesn't have to end there."
- The Book Of Madness

"I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode."
- Unknown

"I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died."
-Unknown

"History, Lister - is written by the winners. How do we know that Oats went out for this legendary walk? From the only surviving document - Scott's diary. And he's hardly likely to have written down, "February the 1st. Bludgeoned Oats to death while he slept, then scoffed him along with last packet of instant mash"! How's that gonna look when he gets rescued, eh? No! Much better to say, "Oats made the supreme sacrifice" while your dabbing up his gravy with the last piece of crusty bread."
-Arnold Rimmer, Red Dwarf

"Don't take life so seriously... it's not permanent."
- Unknown

"Guys, there's some dinner on the floor if you want it!"
- Neal, The Young Ones

"In dog years, I'm dead."
- Unknown

"Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies."
- Unknown

"Our times as a ruler rises and falls like the sun. The sun will set on my time here and will rise with you as the new king."
- "Lion King"

"See that happy moron,
he doesn't give a damn,
I wish I was a moron,
My God! Perhaps I am!"
- Eugenics Review
(I learned this one from Sunni but it's just so cool I had to put it up...)

"If you don't like my attitude, STOP TALKING TO ME!"
- Unknown

"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
- Albert Einstein

"Beware of 0.666 - the number of the millibeast."
- Unknown

"PMS and guns don't mix well. I have PMS. I have a gun. Any questions?"
- Unknown

"Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before."
- Unknown

"Kill one man and you are a murderer. Kill millions and you are a conqueror. Kill all and you are a GOD!"
- Jean Rostand

"Engage!"
- Jean-Luc Picard, 'Star Trek'

"All you need is love, John Lennon, smart man, shot in the back, very sad."
-Independence Day

"In your pursuit of peace and justice, remember, the Force will be with you... always!"
-Star Wars

"You can't get rid of your temper by losing it."
- Unknown

"This world is an uncertain realm, filled with danger. Honour undermined by the pursuit of power, freedom sacrificed when the weak are oppressed by the strong. But there are those who oppose these powerful forces, who dedicate their lives to truth, honour, and freedom. These men are known as Musketeers. Rise, D'Artagnan, and join them."
- "The three Musketeers"

"God bless you, and may all your children be born naked!"
- Unknown

"Why do people believe that aliens, with the technology to cross the fathomless tracts of infinite space, would finally reach earth, and crash? And die. Like they can invent an interstellar drive, but they can't come up with seat-belts."
- Craig Charles

"Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
-(not from Star Trek)

"Marriage is a concept invented by people who were lucky to make it to 20 without being eaten by dinosaurs. Marriage is extinct."
"Dinosaurs are extinct. Marriage is still around."
-St. Elmo's Fire

"It always has been a banana, it always will be a banana, its a banana, its a yellow fruit that you unzip and eat the white bit, its a banana!"
-Kryten, Red Dwarf

"Life sucks... until you realize how little of it you have left."
- Unknown

"He who lives in glass house dresses in the basement."
- Unknown

"Doomsday is near, die all; die merrily"
- William Shakespeare

"Man who walk in middle of road get run over by bus."
- Unknown

"No officer with false teeth should attempt oral sex in zero gravity."
-Kryten, Red Dwarf

"Camille I think I E5-A9-O8-B7 you."
-Kryten, Red Dwarf

"Woman who spend much time on bedspring, may have offspring."
- Unknown

"It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it."
- Unknown

"This is a true story of how friendships run deeper than blood. This is my story of the only three friends in my life that have truly mattered. Two of them were killers that never made it past the age of 35. The other is a non-practicing attorney, living within the pain of his past, too afraid to let go, finding reassurance instead of confronting its horror. I was the only one that could speak for them, and for the children we were."
- "Sleepers"

"I have a medium-sized fire-axe buried in my spinal column. That sort of thing can really put a crimp on your day."
-Kryten, Red Dwarf

"Live hard, Die young, Leave a good-looking corpse!"
-Unknown

"I just made an innocuous comment. I merely voiced the rumour that McWilliams was sexually tilted in favour of sleeping with the dead"
-Arnold Rimmer, Red Dwarf

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."
-Unknown

"Some of the greatest words ever were spoken while you weren't listening."
-Unknown

"Out side of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
-Groucho Marx

"While I was gone, someone stole everything in my apartment and replaced it with an exact replica. When I told my roommate, he said: 'Do I know you?' "
- Unknown

"Sad is not to change your mind. Sad is not have any mind to change."
-Unknown

"The trouble with life in the fast lane is that you get to the other end in an awful hurry."
-John Jensen

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids over all the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- Mariah Carey

"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as Marijuana... The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
- Matt Laurer on NBC's Today Show, August 22

"If you look like your passport photo you're too ill to travel."
-Will Kommen

"Mind that bus, what bus, splat."
-Arnold Rimmer, Red Dwarf