Sometimes I find myself crying out to you when your not even there to hear.
I ask you to hold me even though I know you can't even when you are there.
I beg you to tell me that everything is alright when I know inside that if you could I still wouldn't believe.

Are we going to make it through this?
I don't even trust myself anymore.
I have dreams where you leave me, like the others.
I have dreams where I lose you for holding on too tight.
I have others where I lose you for not holding on tight enough and you don't feel loved.

They don't give out mannuals on how to live.
And if they are, they must have skipped me for some unknown reason.
Even if they did give it to me I'm certain I wouldn't obey the book.
I realise I'm already causing myself pain and that there is more to come.
Why can't I obey the book?
No, no, no, why can't the book obey me?
It has it out for me, I swear....
It doesn't stop here...
No...it never stops...
Please leave before I suck you in with me....


~~forward~~